School closures/delays?

I feel like I’ve been badgering everyone I know about this same old topic, so I figured I’d come over here and bug you guys for a bit too 🤣😳. My little guy was born back in February 2008, which means he’s technically supposed to hit the ground running in kindergarten this coming fall. But honestly? I’ve been leaning pretty hard toward holding him back for another year, especially since he’ll only be six and a half when the school year kicks off.
It’s one of those things where nobody can ever seem to agree, right? You’ve got some child psychologists swearing by delaying enrollment, while others think it’s a terrible idea. Even his preschool psychologist told me that holding him back might not even be necessary, though she did mention that sticking him in daycare for one more extra year could be a total double-edged sword depending on how it plays out.
The academic testing went perfectly—zero issues, no signs of being "behind" or developmentally immature at all. And yet, here I am, still obsessing and weighing my options like crazy.

So, what’s the consensus here? Is it actually better for a kid to start school at seven and a half, or is there more to it when they go in at six and a half?

It’s a bit ungrateful—if you'll excuse my choice of words—to generalize here, given that every single child is their own unique universe.
I have two colleagues, for instance—one started her little one in kindergarten at six and a half, while the other actually pushed for a deferral so her child didn't start until seven and a half. And honestly? Both mothers are perfectly happy with how things played out; in both instances, the kids were developmentally ready to take on the world at those ages. So, really, it all comes down to the individual.

At the end of the day, you know your child better than anyone else ever could. Maybe try looking at how many of his neighborhood friends or preschool buddies are heading off to school this year—it might be worth considering if they'll end up in the same class. Since you mentioned he's already showing maturity, having that social connection might make the transition easier, which could help guide your decision.

Anthony Gray said:It’s a bit ungrateful—if you'll excuse my choice of words—to generalize here, given that every single child is their own unique universe.
I have two colleagues, for instance—one started her little one in kindergarten at six and a half, while the other actually pushed for a deferral so her child didn't start until seven and a half. And honestly? Both mothers are perfectly happy with how things played out; in both instances, the kids were developmentally ready to take on the world at those ages. So, really, it all comes down to the individual.

At the end of the day, you know your child better than anyone else ever could. Maybe try looking at how many of his neighborhood friends or preschool buddies are heading off to school this year—it might be worth considering if they'll end up in the same class. Since you mentioned he's already showing maturity, having that social connection might make the transition easier, which could help guide your decision.

The thing is, I don't know if he's truly ready or not... I mean, emotionally he's definitely stepped up in the last few months, but independence-wise? Not quite there yet, though I guess we kind of enabled that, which is on us. His best friend would be starting school with him this year, but the rest of the crew is going to a different district because of that extended preschool program.
Plus, knowing he'll have such an amazing teacher this year makes me feel way better about pulling the trigger.

What do you mean by "not independent"? Are we talking about the logistics—like commuting to school or handling his own schedule—or is this more about basic hygiene habits?
The teacher’s perspective is actually a pretty crucial piece of the puzzle here.

We’ve still got two years left before we hit the big school milestone, but I’m already thinking about hitting the pause button for an extra year, which would make it three total. I'm curious, though—what’s the potential downside to a move like that, and why do people say staying in preschool for an extra year can be such a double-edged sword?

I don't see anything wrong with keeping a child in preschool until they're 7.5 years old, though I suppose it might get a bit boring if all their friends move on to elementary school. My approach would be based on whether the kid actually feels ready for school and if there's anyone left to play with at the preschool. If they're lonely, I'd enroll them in school; if they still have a social circle, I'd let them stay.

Look, he’s not exactly "independent" yet—I mean, the kid can barely tie his own shoelaces, but let’s be real, how many first graders actually know how to do that? He comes home from preschool constantly with his undershirt untucked and his nose a total mess because he hasn't mastered the art of using a tissue.

I’m honestly not against holding him back, truly. I weigh everything so carefully. On one hand, you’ve got the school experts and the preschool teachers all saying he’s totally ready to go, but then you’ve got the other parents—the ones who’ve been through this loop before—telling me that waiting a year is the smarter move. It’s such a headache because they’re drowning these kids in coursework; these kids are basically glued to their books from the second they walk into class until they get home. It’s like they’re studying for a PhD instead of just trying to learn how to read.

It’s kind of mind-blowing to me, honestly, especially since all I ever hear are horror stories about how intense the curriculum is. There have even been moments where I’ve seriously considered skipping the whole school thing entirely and just fleeing into the wilderness.😳🤣

In his current preschool, he’ll have a few buddies staying behind this year, while his absolute best friend is heading off to elementary school.
The preschool itself is absolutely packed, which is why he’s so reluctant to go there—most of the kids feel the same way. It’s a double-edged sword, really; it’s a literal battle just to find a square inch of personal space.
And man, would it be beyond stupid to try and pull him out and enroll him in a different preschool right now...

If the experts say they're ready, I’m leaning toward their side...

To us, they always seem like babies—but maybe you just have to let them grow up? You gotta ask yourself if this is just another way you'll end up holding them back from being independent.

Over in Canada, kids start ninth grade even earlier and turn out just fine—I'm pretty sure things move fast in the States too.

Richard Morris43 said:I feel like I’ve been badgering everyone I know about this same old topic, so I figured I’d come over here and bug you guys for a bit too 🤣😳. My little guy was born back in February 2008, which means he’s technically supposed to hit the ground running in kindergarten this coming fall. But honestly? I’ve been leaning pretty hard toward holding him back for another year, especially since he’ll only be six and a half when the school year kicks off.
It’s one of those things where nobody can ever seem to agree, right? You’ve got some child psychologists swearing by delaying enrollment, while others think it’s a terrible idea. Even his preschool psychologist told me that holding him back might not even be necessary, though she did mention that sticking him in daycare for one more extra year could be a total double-edged sword depending on how it plays out.
The academic testing went perfectly—zero issues, no signs of being "behind" or developmentally immature at all. And yet, here I am, still obsessing and weighing my options like crazy.

So, what’s the consensus here? Is it actually better for a kid to start school at seven and a half, or is there more to it when they go in at six and a half?

But how can you even delay him if he's already met the age requirements? He's already passed the testing and showed no signs of being behind.😕

With kids right on that age cutoff, I’d definitely lean toward waiting a year, too...
They won't miss much academically, but they'll never get back that one extra year of carefree playtime.

And what does he think about it? Does he talk about school or seem interested? How does he usually play?
Is he the type who's always running around, climbing things, exploring nature, or playing soccer? Or is he more of a quiet kid who prefers drawing, coloring, or listening to stories? Can he sit still for a bit during playtime, or does he prefer more sedentary activities?
How was he with his pre-K assignments back at daycare?

We pushed it back, but even the experts were on board with the delay. I actually just got my paperwork finalized this past Friday. And honestly, the month ahead is really just for the kids in your 🙂

I’m actually heading into the school next week to sit down and have a real talk with the counselor. We’re pretty lucky, honestly, because our local district has one of the top-rated schools in the city.
I didn't bother prepping him at all before the testing, you know? I wanted to see what his actual intellectual and emotional baseline was without any coaching.
As far as sitting still and paying attention goes, he’s actually pretty adaptable, which is a huge win in my book—I think he’ll be able to handle a few hours of classwork without losing it. But man, does he prefer being active? Absolutely. At the start of the school year, he really struggled with those worksheets because he’d just rush through everything just so he could go play.
Things are looking up a bit now, though. He’s focusing more, even if he’s moved a little slower when filling things out, but he gets the work done and usually nails it. And no, we didn't drill perfectionism into him; honestly, nothing ever rubbed me the wrong way more than those parents who demand their kids be flawless all the time.

Regarding us, part of me wishes he could just stay home for another year, but I’m trying to weigh what’s truly best for him. It’s such a massive headache because there isn't some universal rulebook telling you what's right for a kid—do you keep them home or push them into the classroom?
I mean, how much harm can it really do for a kid to stay home for one more year? 🤷

Good luck to you, seriously; at least you don't have to spend all day agonizing over these decisions like I am.

It could be tough if a kid feels left behind at preschool because all their friends moved on to kindergarten, or if they feel like they're being held back as punishment or due to some perceived shortcoming.

Richard Morris43 said:Look, he’s not exactly "independent" yet—I mean, the kid can barely tie his own shoelaces, but let’s be real, how many first graders actually know how to do that? He comes home from preschool constantly with his undershirt untucked and his nose a total mess because he hasn't mastered the art of using a tissue.

I’m honestly not against holding him back, truly. I weigh everything so carefully. On one hand, you’ve got the school experts and the preschool teachers all saying he’s totally ready to go, but then you’ve got the other parents—the ones who’ve been through this loop before—telling me that waiting a year is the smarter move. It’s such a headache because they’re drowning these kids in coursework; these kids are basically glued to their books from the second they walk into class until they get home. It’s like they’re studying for a PhD instead of just trying to learn how to read.

It’s kind of mind-blowing to me, honestly, especially since all I ever hear are horror stories about how intense the curriculum is. There have even been moments where I’ve seriously considered skipping the whole school thing entirely and just fleeing into the wilderness.😳🤣

In his current preschool, he’ll have a few buddies staying behind this year, while his absolute best friend is heading off to elementary school.
The preschool itself is absolutely packed, which is why he’s so reluctant to go there—most of the kids feel the same way. It’s a double-edged sword, really; it’s a literal battle just to find a square inch of personal space.
And man, would it be beyond stupid to try and pull him out and enroll him in a different preschool right now...

Hold on, what has changed so drastically regarding the curriculum for grades K through 4? 😕What a black doctorate?
I haven't heard anything like this from my friends back in the States. Kids go to school just like they always have; some excel, some struggle, some love it, and some don't. People also tend to turn everything into a massive drama.

If his friends are going, he should go. What is he supposed to do in preschool all day?

Around here, kids typically start at age five. That "Year 0" concept is definitely different from how we handle kindergarten in America, given how young those little kids are. We’ll likely enroll him a few weeks early to align with the start of the semester, provided there aren't any issues, so he can stay with his peer group, who are mostly just 3-6 months older than him.

Mine was born on June 15, 2009...
We aren't required to enroll next year, but I have to say—my friends living abroad are genuinely baffled by how I can send my kid to school at 7 years and 3 months instead of 6 years and 3 months. Apparently, in the rest of the Western world, they start earlier... (and I’ve already made it clear: no way am I sending them in at 6 years and 3 months)

Now, kill me if I don't get it—I just can't figure out what stops parents in this country from starting kids early, when in neighboring countries, it's basically the standard practice🤷

It’s like we think we’re the only ones doing things right, while everyone else is just off.
Take Finland, for example—kids don't even start school until after 7:00 AM. Plus, their whole approach to early childhood education is structured completely differently; they don't treat first grade like the high-stakes jump into "real" school that we do here in the States.

Hopefully 🤔 I’m trying to aim for that too 🤷
Mind you, my youngest will be starting this new program (assuming it actually sticks) once elementary school shifts to a nine-year model... she'll be part of that first wave—and she'll be starting a year earlier than usual

Down in Canada, they start things up earlier since it's just for nine-year-olds—but don't expect that old-school first grade vibe you see in the States now. It’s more like an advanced preschool where they sit on the floor, watch TV, and play games for just a few hours. Honestly, for most parents, the whole drop-off and pick-up routine is such a hassle, but hey, I guess it's better for the kids, right? 🤷

Look, I’m not even going to get started on the West right now, that's a whole different conversation entirely. And honestly, if he was born in April or June, there's no way in hell I’d be enrolling him early.

Yeah, the curriculum is way more intense than what we had back in our day—at least that's what all the parents say, and seriously, *every* single parent seems to suggest waiting a bit longer to enroll your kid. There are a million reasons people give, ranging from the coursework being too brutal to the sheer weight of those backpacks.
My relative keeps telling me he's just too tiny... like, he won't be able to carry the bag and he'll basically be invisible to cars on the road.🤣
He's pretty much right in the middle of the pack for his age, standing about 4 feet tall and weighing around 46 pounds, but according to the logic flying around, he really needs to hit closer to 88 pounds before he's ready to tackle kindergarten.🤣

Richard Morris43 said:Look, I’m not even going to get started on the West right now, that's a whole different conversation entirely. And honestly, if he was born in April or June, there's no way in hell I’d be enrolling him early.

Yeah, the curriculum is way more intense than what we had back in our day—at least that's what all the parents say, and seriously, *every* single parent seems to suggest waiting a bit longer to enroll your kid. There are a million reasons people give, ranging from the coursework being too brutal to the sheer weight of those backpacks.
My relative keeps telling me he's just too tiny... like, he won't be able to carry the bag and he'll basically be invisible to cars on the road.🤣
He's pretty much right in the middle of the pack for his age, standing about 4 feet tall and weighing around 46 pounds, but according to the logic flying around, he really needs to hit closer to 88 pounds before he's ready to tackle kindergarten.🤣

I’m genuinely curious if these concerns are valid. One thing I am sure of is that textbooks in later grades seem much thinner, more engaging, and better designed than ours used to be. Is there less time allocated for the same amount of material? Is there actually more to learn now? Or are the books just better, and maybe kids today just have shorter attention spans? I'd love to hear some perspectives on this.

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Hopefully so. 🤔 I'm starting to feel the same way about it. 🤷
My younger daughter will be part of that new curriculum—assuming they don't change things again—once the elementary school system switches to a nine-year model. She’ll actually be starting a year earlier than usual, making her part of that very first class.

I’m honestly not sure how they plan to pull this off—whether it means starting school earlier in the day or just extending after-school programs. But I think we should probably save that for its own separate discussion. 😁