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Brandon Newman95 said:Yeah, I get that. It could be a clinical psychologist who does psychotherapy, or a psychiatrist who specializes in it. Honestly? If I were in her shoes, I'd go with the psychologist-therapist route.
I agree. My main point was simply that not every psychiatrist or psychologist actually has specialized training in psychotherapy. When people don't realize that distinction and end up seeing someone without that specific education, they often walk away with more damage done than help received.
Brandon Newman95 said:This story hits way too close to home. It’s giving me major Tild vibes... honestly, it feels like something I would’ve written myself back when I was twenty. If I were you, I’d definitely look into talking to someone. You don't have to jump straight to a psychiatrist or anything, but maybe just find a good psychologist to vent to.
Don't go to just anyone, whether they are a psychiatrist or a psychologist. If you decide to see one, make sure they are specifically trained as psychotherapists.
BramtyP,
It’s truly unfortunate that your relationship with your mother feels so hollow, almost as if she isn't even there. I imagine there is a quiet, persistent longing deep down for the warmth, acceptance, and tenderness that most people associate with the concept of a mother.
Your conclusion makes sense; the way she treated you and the environment you were raised in—which seems to be the same one you're still navigating—has undoubtedly shaped how you approach intimacy and why connecting with others feels so difficult today.
I want to offer some encouragement: while a cold upbringing leaves its marks and creates certain behavioral patterns, it is entirely possible to work through this and build a stable sense of self and healthy relationships. I see evidence of this happening every single day. If you find that you're struggling to make progress on your own, please consider seeking out psychotherapy. There is no reason to shoulder this burden alone, nor should you risk passing these unconscious patterns onto your own future partners or family.
Wishing you nothing but the best.