Posts by Larry Lewis

Charles Patel said:I’d tell him no 😛 if I actually 😛

Yeah, sure, I get what you're saying 😉

But let's be real—cheating is just as much of a trigger for schizophrenia😂

That’s like asking someone if they would have married their spouse if they had known from day one that they were going to be unfaithful. It’s a bit of a circular, pointless question, isn't it?🤷

Charles Patel said:I drop in on this thread every now and then to learn from these "real-life examples," since I work in the medical field. 😉

Quick question: for anyone here who used marijuana or other drugs that likely acted as a trigger for your condition—do you actually regret doing it now?

Personally, I don't regret it one bit; if I had access to some weed right now, I'd light up in a heartbeat.

Eric Mitchell55 said:Honestly, they’re all pretty much the same. And hey, you're alright too—I mean, if I look at it from my sister's perspective, you're definitely someone I'd get along with. 🤣🤣

I’m perfectly fine just being my own person... honestly, I'm quite enough for myself.😍

Eric Mitchell55 said:To be honest, I've actually never even tried moonshine before😳

Sorry, I’m being a bit of a menace—but hey, that's just why I like you.🙂

Eric Mitchell55 said:Well, it doesn't necessarily have to be that way.
I actually went through a few similar episodes myself back in the day, and I was strictly following my prescription the whole time. 🤷

And let’s be clear: whiskey definitely doesn't count as medication.😛

David Vaughn75 said:Blue Jays, how did things shake out with that schizoaffective acquaintance of yours?

So, here’s the play-by-play on what went down today: our buddy who was working the unit with us started spiraling—full-on hallucinations, paranoid conspiracy theories, the whole nine yards. Then it got dark; he started threatening to take his own life, so the guys and I had to call 911, and they ended up hauling him off to a psych ward in Seattle. He made it pretty clear that we don't exist to him anymore because we blew the whistle, but honestly? If I could go back in time, I’d do the exact same thing. Look, if he actually goes through with it, I don't want that weight on my shoulders for the rest of my life thinking I could've stepped up but didn't. How this all plays out is out of my hands now, but I did what I could, and my conscience is clean.

He probably just stopped taking his meds.

Dana Miller7 said:Easy.🤣

Honestly, I’ve always thought about wanting to be Stalin—the man had a great hairstyle, and let’s be real, he was an effective dictator... kind of fits my vibe, I guess.🤣

Melissa Sanchez59 said:I think you misunderstood me—not really. Of course I get up and go to work, but the issue isn't just that I'm sleepy. It's more like I'm completely slowed down and my brain feels totally blunt. I just can't think. I don't know how to put it, everything is just... foggy? I can barely make even the simplest logical connections...

So, if I see that I won't be able to get enough sleep, I'd rather just nap for a couple of hours on something milder, then just power through the next day with coffee to stay somewhat functional. Because, honestly, I'm just sleep-deprived. What I'm talking about isn't just being tired—it's much worse than that.

I get up at 6:30 AM. If I want to try and sleep, I have to take an AP by 8:30. By 9:00, I'm already feeling totally drugged, and by 10:00 at the latest, I've passed out. So, you can probably imagine that sometimes I just have way too much going on and I can't exactly afford to sleep that much every single day.

That’s exactly how it’s been for me whenever I’ve had a job, past or present.

I mean, fine, go ahead and vent—it sucks, I get it—but you aren't going to find a fix for this on an internet forum. You need to go see a real doctor in a proper clinic.

Melissa Sanchez59 said:I think you misunderstood me—not really. Of course I get up and go to work, but the issue isn't just that I'm sleepy. It's more like I'm completely slowed down and my brain feels totally blunt. I just can't think. I don't know how to put it, everything is just... foggy? I can barely make even the simplest logical connections...

So, if I see that I won't be able to get enough sleep, I'd rather just nap for a couple of hours on something milder, then just power through the next day with coffee to stay somewhat functional. Because, honestly, I'm just sleep-deprived. What I'm talking about isn't just being tired—it's much worse than that.

I get up at 6:30 AM. If I want to try and sleep, I have to take an AP by 8:30. By 9:00, I'm already feeling totally drugged, and by 10:00 at the latest, I've passed out. So, you can probably imagine that sometimes I just have way too much going on and I can't exactly afford to sleep that much every single day.

Poor thing. Honestly, pretty much everyone feels that way, even those who aren't on medication. I suppose that's why we've all become so fragile lately—we're just mentally ill-equipped for this modern grind.

darksurfer4 said:I work a job that involves night shifts, and honestly, I absolutely loathe them!!!! By the next day, my brain is just completely fried; I simply haven't mastered the art of sleeping while the sun is actually up!! What’s even more infuriating is how often I miss out on half of the Champions League matches—I'll turn on the TV and within sixty seconds, I'm out cold...

During these graveyard shifts where there’s practically zero work to be done, I find myself scrolling through Reddit, and man, it is incredibly toxic. You'll see people posting at 3:00 or even 4:00 AM saying they need to get going because they have to head into work in the morning, and it makes me wonder: what kind of shape are they actually in when they show up to their jobs???!!!????

Thinking back to some of the more famous figures who were known night owls, I think of Hitler, Stalin, Rembrandt, and Edison. Take Hitler, for example; he achieved incredible successes during his early reign, but eventually, Hitler becomes totally irrational and drags his entire country straight into catastrophe!!!!

And don't even get me started on Stalin. He was a liberal, an artist, a poet, always ready to lend a hand to anyone—only to transform into a paranoid wreck who ended up executing or sending almost his entire government and military leadership to a gulag!!!!

Is it possible that these bouts of irrationality exhibited by Adolf Hitler and Joseph Stalin could actually be attributed to chronic sleep deprivation???

Honestly, after a single night without any shut-eye, even Adolf Hitler wouldn't be much to me.🙂

Susan Evans3 said:OP - Look, you need some serious backbone and a real reason to break this cycle you're stuck in, because honestly? This routine is just a one-way ticket to misery. This whole sleep deprivation thing triggers a massive domino effect. You skip sleep, you end up dragging your feet or flat-out missing work or class; then you try to make up for it by staying up all night, which basically nukes any chance of having a social life or even a functioning existence outside of your bedroom. It’s a downward spiral toward a pretty bleak future. Just thinking about how bad it gets should be enough to scare the hell out of you and force a change.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L02r6fkcz2c

Kevin Nguyen3 said:Did you ever stop to wonder why I can manage while so many others end up passing out from these meds?
A huge number of people rely on APs just to get some sleep.
But you? You take them because of your actual diagnosis.
For them, the effect is hit-or-miss, totally inconsistent; but for you, they work exactly the way they are supposed to.
You handle them better because your body processes them differently than someone who doesn't have psychosis—any kind of psychosis.
Sure, it’s an extreme way to knock yourself out, but sometimes there isn't any other option.
That right there is proof that an AP isn't a "one size fits all" solution, and you shouldn't play games with them. I'm talking to those people who skip their anxiety meds and jump straight to APs without thinking.
I take them too, and for a few hours after, I'm basically a houseplant. Just sleeping. And I've been doing it that way for years, damn it.😢

Oh, they work alright, alright—what do you think happens when I try to roll out of bed on a day off? It’s a massive struggle. These things try to drag me under like a freight train, tempting me to just sleep the whole day away, but I refuse to give in.

Kevin Nguyen3 said:Well, look at you now—you've gone and embarrassed both your boss and the whole station.😁
Where exactly is this "willpower" and "discipline" coming from... the bottom of a bottle at a dive bar?
The reality is simple: you need to take your medication earlier, and that's the whole story.
As for me, I’m done for the night after 10 PM... because once I take my pills, I’m out for the count.🙄

I didn't blow it. For two years straight, I held down the job—hitting the sack around midnight and dragging myself out of bed by 6:30 AM every single morning. It was brutal, sure, and I lived off caffeine, but I showed up. And honestly, I don't need to bring up my diagnosis just to justify it—it wasn't like I was spending my evenings on some "manly" session of AP therapy.

What, is every person dealing with schizophrenia supposed to just quit their job because the medication makes them a zombie in the morning? That's ridiculous.

Of course I was sleepy, and yeah, I was usually in a foul mood until about 10 AM, but I had to work. Period. You just grit your teeth and deal with it.

Melissa Sanchez59 said:Well, I actually was taking them regularly back when I could afford to get that much sleep every night. I mean, everything feels fine once I manage to get 8 or 9 hours—otherwise, it’s just a total disaster. I already know all that other stuff, though, so no worries there.

@Jason Vaughn482 I'm not taking Coaxil.

Hmm... well, I spent quite a bit of time on various antipsychotics during my working years, and honestly? I still managed to drag myself out of bed simply because I knew I had to be up.
Sure, those drugs tend to dull your edge—they definitely cloud things—but you still have your own willpower and discipline to fall back on.

Melissa Sanchez59 said:Well, it’s not quite that simple. For me, even tiny doses of antipsychotics turn me into a total zombie—well, except during my absolute worst crises, when I can actually handle a bit more, but luckily that's been super rare lately.
The only thing they do for me is help me sleep, but I can't even take them at night unless I know I have 8 or 9 hours to spare, otherwise I can barely function the next day. Everything feels slow and foggy, and I just can't think. It's hard to even describe how awful that feels; I can barely make it through the day. Plus, it's tough to find that much time for sleep with everything else going on. Sanval is basically garbage—it leaves me waking up in a panic every few hours. And I've definitely been taking too many anxiolytics for way too long. Honestly, I'm just sick of these meds. I just want to function like a normal person.😢

APs don't cause addiction, and they work wonders in small doses, especially for sleep.
I honestly think if you were taking a small, consistent dose of an AP specifically for sleep, your body would eventually adjust and you wouldn't feel like a zombie.
And I'll say it again: APs aren't addictive, but those anxiolytics? They're the dangerous ones in that regard.

Edit: Definitely check in with your doctor about it.

nimbletinker10 said:Well, there's a massive downside if you can't drag yourself out of bed for work the next morning.😁 I used to be the exact same way; once darkness hits, I finally come alive. All those "must-dos," expectations, stress, and obligations just vanish—it's finally my time, you know? It feels like such a waste to sleep through it. 😁
Jebada is that I can't function at the office the following day. I'm definitely not a morning person anymore, but I force myself to hit the sack at a decent hour just so I can actually get through my shift.
Structure in life is absolutely vital. Seriously. And having an organized daily routine is everything.

I served in the military, and honestly, that was enough discipline for one lifetime.😂

I really want to thank you ladies—honestly, I feel like a total jerk for being so cocky earlier, and I truly owe you an apology.

But look, since we’re going to nitpick my choice of words—and since I’ve actually been a fan of yours since before you all stepped into those moderator roles—I have to say, you’ve consistently offered such solid advice and genuinely thoughtful perspectives over the years. It's rare to see such a class act online.

In fact, if any of you ever decides to pursue a career as a psychiatrist, consider this my official application to be one of your patients.🙂

Michelle Evans said:By the time those pills even kick in, the paramedics will have shown up and hauled him off to the ER five times over...

Listen, I get it—really, I do—but back when I was flying solo and completely off my meds, I once split a 5mg Xanax into quarters during one of those deep, dark psychotic episodes. And honestly? That tiny little quarter was enough to take the edge off immediately. It was palpable.

So, what I’m saying is, if things are hitting rock bottom and you need an ambulance, any psychiatric med is going to provide some level of relief.

EDIT: I remember one time, right at the absolute peak of a breakdown, I called 911 to come get me. Can you believe it? I actually told them my full diagnosis and everything—they almost didn't laugh, though God knows they wanted to—and then I ended up having to call an Uber just to get myself to the psych ward at Bellevue... you truly cannot make this stuff up.

Michelle Evans said:There really isn't anything funny about it... 🤷

I was just listing my goals and how I see myself improving. I honestly meant it as a compliment. Just a general one...
(Having iPads at a wedding is a great touch. 🙏 )

I promise, I won't do it again. 😳
I'm off to go cause trouble somewhere else.

Then you turn around and dismiss me when I’m actually being serious, telling me I have a "good sense of humor" and that I should just take it as a joke.

Well, thanks for the clarification. And hey, let me return the favor—compliments to you for using actual, human language for once. And sorry if I’m being a bit defensive—I’ve been on this planet for thirty-five years now, so I suppose I've earned the right to be a little prickly.

Peace Corps