Posts by Larry Lewis

David Vaughn75 said:Larry Lewis, why've you gotta be so brutally honest all the time? Honestly, having a little bit of diplomacy is a damn important life skill 😬

Ah... I suppose that's just what happens when people lose their minds—or maybe I don't even know anymore.🤷

briskcyclist40 said:

For me, OCD is hands down the worst. It mostly shows up as those constant, intrusive thoughts you just can't shake.

I totally get what you're saying. Back when my life was a complete wreck and the stress was hitting redline, I tried dealing with it, and then the panic attacks started rolling in. It didn't last forever, but let me tell you, it wasn't exactly a walk in the park. I remember my doctor telling me that's what happens when things overflow—when the stress builds up too high and anxiety just takes over. Honestly? It feels more like a psychological hurdle than some clinical psychiatric issue. Maybe it’s enough to just—and I know how easy this sounds to say—actually sit down and find answers to the questions we keep burying deep inside ourselves.

Believe me, I have spent countless hours digging through my own head and interrogating my own soul until I felt physically sick to my stomach—and even then, nothing changed.🙂

I think my psyche is just plain worn thin, and honestly? That's just the way the cookie crumbles.

briskcyclist40 said:Larry Lewis, have you ever looked into B3 therapy—you know, niacin?
Do you read much English? Take a look at this; http://www.drmyhill.co.uk/wiki/Schiz...emical_problem

I just stumbled onto this connection today between metabolic issues caused by a B3 deficiency and full-blown psychosis. I've been reading all over the place about how people are seeing incredible results. In a lot of cases, the hallucinations and depression just... vanished. It's hard to find much info on this in American medical circles, but there’s plenty of research out there in English and Italian.
I actually sat down with my son's doctor today to talk about trying this out, and he gave me the green light. Honestly, he was starting to suspect something like this anyway, especially since the standard meds don't seem to be doing anything for my son at all.

I haven't tried it yet, though I might give it a shot while I still have some extra cash to burn.
Mind you, I’m already taking a whole cocktail of supplements—The Pentagon, calcium-magnesium-zinc, and a few other things.

My episodes aren't exactly life-shattering, but then again, anyone with half a brain would want to get rid of them.

For me personally, OCD is the absolute worst part—it mostly manifests as those relentless, intrusive thoughts that just won't quit.

briskcyclist40 said:

I just wanted to say that having a psychotic diagnosis doesn't automatically make someone a crazy or terrible person!

Of course they aren't. My son deals with psychosis, so obviously I don't see things that way.
The main thing is that when you're living with someone going through a psychotic episode, you have to stay as calm as possible. If you don't, you just end up feeding into their anxiety and making everything worse.
It sounds like vividorca9 is reaching her breaking point—you can tell by how she’s typing—but panicking isn't helping anyone, least of all him. Honestly, it would be best if both of them sought out professional help so they can each find some stability. You can't just dump your own mental state onto the other person. That just creates this endless cycle and makes the whole house feel like a pressure cooker.
It takes a massive amount of patience, tenderness, and just plain old love. Because if that person starts feeling unloved? That’s terrifying for them.

I've been through the exact same wringer they're in right now—I know firsthand that there's nothing I can say to fix it, so I'll spare everyone the useless lecturing on the subject.

vividorca9 said:Did I ever mention that you all are absolutely insane and terrible? Do I really need to bold the sensitive, beautiful, and brilliant part I just pointed out? And the creative part?

I was just echoing what jumbi said—honestly, I was just repeating myself. You saw exactly which parts I chose to bold.

You know enough about this whole mess that any further debate is just a waste of breath—besides, everyone here has actually tried to lend a hand. But hey, whatever... life is a bitch sometimes.

vividorca9 said:Look, I’m sorry if my comments rubbed you the wrong way, but I have zero interest in playing politically correct when it comes to stuff I have to deal with on a daily basis.

I'll just stop posting then. 🤷

Don't be an idiot. The guy is in the middle of a psychotic break, plain and simple; there's no room for "correctness" in a situation like that. Honestly, if I were in your shoes, I'd tell you to get as far away from him as possible—dealing with someone in that state is an absolute nightmare, especially since you've got your own baggage to carry. There's no profound wisdom here, just reality.

All I was trying to point out—and clearly, I've missed the mark—is that having a psychotic diagnosis doesn't automatically make someone a monster or a lost cause!

briskcyclist40 said:The check-up is almost over, but I really have to hold it together so I don't lose my mind dealing with all this constant attacking.

I’m just as crazy as anyone else—if I start arguing with him about this stuff, it never ends well. I’m going to try ignoring it from now on, but at least I managed to talk him into actually showing up for the appointment.

And yeah, he’s always been untrustworthy and difficult. It’s true. But right now? He’s seriously crossed the line of common sense. This disease is just heavy...

Jesus, the projections are the absolute worst part. I was talking to a friend of mine who's in college, and I think he's got some deep-seated complexes because out of nowhere, he starts telling me I'm stupid for no reason. Or if I compliment him on something that actually bothers him personally, he just starts attacking me. Honestly, it feels like I'm dealing with a toddler right now.

Larry Lewis, believe me, this isn't about stigma. Do you honestly think this behavior is helping him? I don't even want to imagine what the communication is like between those two young people...

The reality is, he's in a state of psychosis and requires medical intervention. His current condition isn't a life sentence—having a diagnosis doesn't mean you're "crazy" forever (if you'll excuse my choice of words). I keep saying this: there are plenty of people living with schizophrenia whom you would never suspect because they've managed their treatment so effectively.

I know how hard this is for vividorca9—I remember clearly when I was going through my own psychotic episode, and God, how difficult I was to be around... absolutely insufferable. But I'm not that person anymore because I take my treatment seriously.
He simply needs to get under professional care, otherwise, things are only going to spiral downward for both of them.
I know she's completely exhausted and has nothing left to give; honestly, it might be best if she distances herself from him, at least temporarily, while he's in this acute phase of the illness.

I just wanted to make it clear: having a diagnosis doesn't mean you've lost your mind for good.

briskcyclist40 said:vividorca9, I was just reading over what you wrote... Are we talking about your husband here, or are you guys not even married? (I’m a bit confused by that part where you mention gray hair popping up—makes me think you might still be pretty young).
Manipulation, lying, keeping secrets, paranoia, indifference, coldness, jealousy rooted in feeling inferior... these are all red flags. It's a sickness. You either accept him as he is or you walk away. He isn't going to change; if he's been stuck in a psychosis for this long, it's likely baked right into his personality at this point. What seems absurd to you might be totally normal to him. You have to take him with everything he brings to the table—including the stuff he hasn't even done yet, which could lead to some pretty nasty surprises for you. And honestly? Your anger isn't helping him. All you're doing is making an already impossible situation even worse.
Psychosis is a wild horse you can't tame... just remember that!! Don't go thinking you can save him if it's not something he actually wants for himself. You can't help anyone against their own will.
There's a lot more to unpack here... shoot me a DM.
Take care!!

Why is there always this constant stigma?
It isn't his fault that he's experiencing psychosis. If he goes to a hospital and gets the right treatment, things could turn out perfectly fine. Psychosis isn't some permanent sentence—we have excellent doctors and effective medications now. It's an acute state that can be managed with proper care.

It's exactly because of people who view us as some kind of lost causes—people whose lives are just too much of a burden to deal with—that life becomes so difficult.
Just tell me: how would you feel if someone you loved was diagnosed with a malignant tumor, and then someone had the nerve to write to you saying you should just abandon them because they'll die soon anyway? That they shouldn't bother staying by their side because it's "too much work" and will only negatively impact your own life?

Larry Barrett2 said:Can someone give me a quick breakdown of what a schizophrenic episode actually looks like? I have BPD, but when I was sitting there with my psychiatrist, I kept most of this to myself... He prescribed me some > and >. Honestly, antidepressants don't do squat for me—they don't help at all—whereas Risperdal, which is an antipsychotic, noticeably shuts down all those unreal fantasies running through my head. I don't deal with auditory or visual hallucinations, but my brain just won't shut up; it creates these intense trips where I’m everything I want to be, even though I'm not that person in the real world. When I'm in that headspace, it feels like I'm totally losing touch with reality. It gets so intense that I'll catch myself pacing around the house for no reason at all. Once one of these episodes finally breaks, I feel like a walking corpse and the depression just hits me like a ton of bricks.

Take a moment to scroll through this thread or just do a quick Google search on the symptoms—it might give you some perspective. Otherwise, look, speaking as someone who has been working in the mental health field for a long time—I can tell you right off the bat that your mental health is definitely compromised. That’s just my initial take. Of course, doctors have their own way of gauging the extent of things, but at the end of the day, you’re the only one who truly knows the full picture of what's going on inside your own head.

vividorca9 said:He is on meds, but they aren't working for him. He actually ended up in a psychosis last time because of this exact treatment. He started taking them again just to please me regarding some specific thing we won't get into right now (and nobody asked him to!), but whenever he's on that stuff, his libido goes through the roof in a totally unhealthy way, and he gets hyper-religious too.

He has check-ups, but I’m worried he’ll lie to the psychiatrist since the meds "work" for him in that one specific area.

Mark my words—once that psychosis finally breaks him, he’s going to be begging you to haul him off to a hospital. It’ll be a brutal recovery, a long, agonizing slog through the dark—and frankly, it’s all his own damn fault. He’s being incredibly foolish. He’s been through this exact cycle of psychotic breaks before, yet here we are again, watching him stubbornly refuse any kind of help. It’s self-sabotage at its finest, really—this refusal to accept assistance even when the walls are closing in. He's digging his own grave, and quite honestly, I've seen this movie before.

vividorca9 said:I know. But he just won't budge. Every time I tell him, "You're acting psychotic," he snaps back with, "I'm not psychotic, you're the one who's psychotic—look, you're crying." Well, yeah, I'm crying because I'm watching you act like an absolute idiot, not because I've lost my mind.

It's the same old stuff: religious obsessions, weird dreams, superstitions, and daydreaming all day without any connection to reality. Then there's the zero-control hypersexuality, the binge eating, and the total emotional instability. He’s also dealing with auditory hallucinations; I’m basically his worst enemy because he tells me he feels like people are attacking him through subtle cues (I won't go into detail so he doesn't recognize himself). It's just constant grandiose delusions fueled by people he thinks are "friends." He treats whatever they say as gospel, like he's lost the ability to think for himself. He parrots their words like a damn parrot, hides everything from me, and manipulates me constantly. And now, even loud noises are bothering him...🤷

So, is this psychosis, or am I actually the crazy one here? 🤷

It's psychosis—and honestly, what comes after that can be even worse.

Fellow sufferers—I just wanted to state for the record that my medication dosage has been bumped up yet again. At this rate, I’m convinced that one day I’ll simply wake up as one giant, oversized pill☕ and proceed to brew myself a mid-day cup of coffee😍

slystag43 said:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9XzTzB2b4Q

Listen, you idiots, get it through your heads once and for all: I don't have F20. 🙂 If you're crazy, that's on you, but I'm not. 🙂 I don't have hallucinations, and I manage my mood swings with Seroquel.

(Seroquel) handles both the lack of hallucinations and stabilizes my mood at the same time. ☕ 🙄

Which bottom-feeders? Are we actually going to go out there and tear them apart?!

vividorca9 said:Hey there. How can you tell if someone is actually having a psychotic break, specifically when dealing with paranoid schizophrenia?

And if they are, how do you explain to them that things aren't actually going down like they think? 🤷 Because, obviously, they won't admit they're in a psychosis because, in their eyes, I'm just trying to mess with them.

Honestly, I'm losing my mind too. :gaah:

Thank God he's never been violent—he's actually a very quiet, passive guy 😍—but this mental state is absolutely destroying both him and me.

It is incredibly difficult to reason with someone mid-psychosis. It took me reaching my absolute breaking point before I ended up taking a taxi to a psychiatric ward in NYC because the paramedics wouldn't even pick me up.
You know as well as I do that the longer someone stays in that state, the harder the recovery becomes—and frankly, the brain starts taking actual organic damage.

Just try everything in your power to talk them into getting medical help immediately; there really isn't any other way.

But please, don't abandon them now while things are at their worst, or it will just sink them into an even deeper hole.

Harold Anderson3 said:I actually worked a construction job while dealing with schizophrenia myself, though my shifts were ten hours instead of twelve.😁
I ended up getting fired after only four days because😢 my boss was just a total flake.
At the end of the day, construction is pretty much like any other job, it’s just a little more taxing on the body.😉

I used to pull shifts just like this back when I actually had some life left in me—and honestly, it wasn't even that grueling. I’d finish up, grab a cold Budweiser, maybe light up a cigarette, and call it a night... only to be right back on the job site at sunrise. No complaints then. But now? Lord help me. If I tried to maintain that kind of pace for even six months, my body would probably just file for bankruptcy.
I used to hold down some truly respectable, high-class positions—real professional work—right up until that whole 2008 meltdown hit. Honestly? I’ll be mourning the loss of that career for the rest of my life.

Who cares about some minor little anxiety—it’s not even worth our breath🙂

Schizophrenia? Please. Try pulling twelve-hour shifts on a construction site in Chicago during a heatwave—then you'll see what real life actually feels like🙂

David Vaughn75 said:Look, depression is pretty much the same boat as schizophrenia—if you catch it early and actually get on top of treatment right away, you can usually get things back under control.

I’m telling you, we really lucked out being born in an era where modern medicine actually exists. Sure, the social stigma is still heavy—it's everywhere—but at least they aren't treating us like monsters or pariahs the way they used to back in the day. We aren't being crucified by society for our chemistry anymore.

As for me, the schizophrenia isn't even my biggest hurdle right now—since I don't really deal with the psychotic side of things—it's the OCD that's killing me... just constant, endless loops.🙂

It truly baffles me—honestly, it leaves me somewhat stunned—just how much normalcy a person living with schizophrenia can maintain. And I’m not just talking about my own experience here; I’ve seen plenty of folks in my own circles navigating life with that diagnosis who seem perfectly composed. Believe me when I say this: if it were a choice, I would take a diagnosis of schizophrenia over chronic depression any day of the week.

Kevin Nguyen3 said:Illness... it’s a heavy thing, isn't it? A truly heavy thing. Of course, medications can leave you feeling quite unwell—unsettled, even—but it is nothing compared to the actual weight of the disease itself. There is no comparison! And long-term treatment—when it is handled correctly, mind you, strictly by the book—can actually suppress the symptoms of schizophrenia. It can suppress them so effectively that, sometimes, you wouldn't even dream of suspecting that the person standing right in front of you is struggling with an illness at all. Would you even know? Could you tell? Often, you simply wouldn't.

Sometimes, if I’m being completely honest, a little bit of bourbon helps me not notice my conversational partner is ill either.🙂

David Vaughn75 said:And look, it’s always gonna be this way until society finally stops acting like mental illness is some kind of moral failing and starts treating it like any other medical issue. I mean, seriously—if you lose a leg, people feel for you and offer help, right? But if you've got schizophrenia, people just steer clear because they think you aren't "tough enough" to keep your head straight. It's a joke.

And honestly, it isn't even about how you actually behave—it’s the label. The second someone hears a diagnosis, they either put you under a microscope or just hit the mute button entirely. It's exhausting. You get lucky sometimes when you find someone who looks past the clinical terms, and thank God there are still people like that out there, but it shouldn't be a rarity. Ultimately, though, the most vital thing is for the person living with the diagnosis to accept themselves and their reality—without that self-acceptance, you aren't moving an inch.

They say the one who fights might lose, but the one who doesn't bother fighting has already lost the war.

You have to be brave enough to be selective—only let certain people be allowed to shape how you see yourself.