Posts by Rachel Williams

I was thinking today about how much harder it is for athletes from tiny places to actually make a mark on the world stage. When you come from a massive country, you have endless resources, huge training facilities, and a massive pool of talent to pull from. It’s almost expected that someone will eventually win something big.

But when you're representing a tiny little island or a small territory, the odds feel completely stacked against you. I remember watching a local swimmer back in high school who was absolutely crushing every regional meet, but she just didn't have the funding to travel for the big stuff. It felt like her potential was hitting a ceiling just because of where she was born.

It makes me wonder if we give enough credit to the sheer willpower it takes to compete at an elite level when you don't have a giant nation backing your every move. Is it actually harder to reach the top when you're essentially a "small fish" in a massive global pond?

Do you think being the underdog actually helps with motivation, or does the lack of resources eventually just hold everyone back?

I went ahead and gathered every single one of my mother's medications and dropped them off at her primary care physician's office. It’s a strange feeling, isn't it? We, or rather Mom, used to receive those "unlabeled" prescriptions from the doctor quite often, so I can only hope that her leftovers might actually serve some purpose for someone else in need.

My deepest condolences, Joshua Kim69. I hope you can find some small measure of peace in knowing they aren't suffering anymore; let's be honest, it was an incredibly difficult road for everyone involved.

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Amanda Perez42 said:Hello everyone. Does anyone know if there are any organizations in Miami that offer psychological support for cancer patients? Or perhaps just a general support group of some kind?

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You can find a directory of patient advocacy groups right here on St, including several specifically focused on oncology. It might be worth reaching out to them to see what resources they have available. Additionally, some people find solace through various forms of spiritual therapy—perhaps that could provide some mental relief as well? Best of luck.

amberseal said:Hi everyone. My mom (64) ended up in the hospital the other day because of some chest pain. An ultrasound showed a 3mm infiltrate on her spleen.
She had seen a doctor previously about a cough, but the chest X-ray came back clear.
About three months ago, some walnut-sized lumps started appearing on her torso. Her doctor insists they're just lipomas and is referring her to a dermatologist. She’s been under their care since 2020.
Today, she had an ultrasound on those lumps. The doctor at the hospital looked at the info and said they aren't lipomas—they're metastases.
What happens now? What are the next steps? My dad and I are in total shock. They’re going to perform a biopsy on the lumps. Is there any hope left? What are the prognoses?

Uh... honestly, the best thing to do is wait for the results. But, based on my own experience with my mother and her lumps (in her case, they were discovered to be metastatic breast cancer after several months, even though she was being monitored for lung cancer), this doesn't sound particularly good... They will likely send her for a PET scan to get a full picture of the situation and see where else the metastases might be.
I am wishing you all a lot of strength for whatever comes next, regardless of what the results show.

It has been four months since my mother passed, and I am just three weeks away from giving birth. To make matters worse, we found out yesterday that my aunt—my mom's sister—has been diagnosed with lymphoma... 🕺

Maria Allen6, I wish you nothing but strength and courage as you continue this fight. We honestly need more stories like yours on this thread—and frankly, more positive news in general. 🎉

Terry Ruiz23, I hear your frustration, and while I see where you're coming from, I view things through a slightly different lens. In my experience, if my mother’s primary care physician hadn't been so relentless, she probably would have never received a diagnosis at all. She was bounced from one specialist to another, sent on a wild goose chase through endless clinics, and after several years (!) of running in circles, it was obviously too late to change the outcome. To make matters worse, two doctors at a pulmonary clinic—one of whom actually held a director position!—tried to convince her she had scarring from tuberculosis she never even had, only for it to turn out to be lung cancer. Then, on the other hand, specialists at a rib clinic were insisting those lumps on her neck were just fatty deposits, when they actually turned out to be metastases fused to her nerves. How does a situation spiral so far out of control? My poor mother suffered so much after the diagnosis; she endured three and a half agonizing years before she finally passed. 🕺

Maria Gray45 said:I see that, but where exactly did it metastasize? Was it the lungs?

The lungs, yes.

Linda Fox2 said:Thank you all for the support..

My brother-in-law is doing poorly. He was supposed to be discharged from the hospital to home hospice care these past few days, but his condition took a turn for the worse today. It seems likely that his large intestine ruptured above the tumor, causing contents to spill into the abdomen. On top of that, his kidneys are failing—his urine is dark brown. His liver is also shutting down; his blood has become extremely thin and refuses to clot. Because of this, they’ve called off the surgery to attempt an ostomy bag to divert the waste. Alibse won't risk it because it feels immoral to touch him when they know he might simply die on the operating table. So now, one by one, the organs are just flickering out. They’ll give him heavy sedatives so he isn't even aware of it.

We said our goodbyes today; all the little grandkids came by, and I know he wanted to see them more than anything. He is still conscious, lucid, and communicative. His brain works. But the body is giving up. You can tell he knows the end is near. It’s devastating how much weight he lost in less than a month. He hasn't even received an official diagnosis based on the pathology report yet, and he is already dying. It's tragic. I only wish for him that he doesn't have to make it until morning—that the suffering stops and he moves on to a better place.

I am so sorry... I was praying too, asking God to shorten his pain, but it wasn't even close to being this bad. I just hope there is as little suffering as possible now that he has managed to say goodbye to everyone. Wishing you all so much strength.

A colleague of mine is the best man for a wedding and he’s tasked with organizing a bachelor party down in Split. The whole group consists of Austrians who don't speak a word of American, so they're effectively flying blind. I visited St twice a long time ago, but my husband hasn't been once, so neither of us can be much help here. Are there any local Americans or Dalmatian women around who could offer some guidance so we can pass the info along? Where do guys usually hold these things in St? Which clubs are actually safe? Where can you find a decent atmosphere? And most importantly, how does one avoid those hospitality workers who treat foreigners like sheep arriving at a shearing shed?
Thanks 🙂

Linda Fox2 said:They'll probably fly him out to Italy if there's any way he can travel.

They've concluded he’s too weak because his blood work isn't looking good, apparently. Yet, strangely, nobody mentions anything about a transfusion. They’re just pumping him with antibiotics because his CRP levels are high. To be honest, they haven't even told them they'll attempt to stabilize his blood counts. All they’re doing is handing out painkillers and antibiotics.

The surgeon was in today; the colonoscopy confirmed everything is pointing toward an intestinal obstruction. He went in to assess whether surgery was an option, but he backed out. He said he's afraid the patient wouldn't survive it. So, they’ll just wait—unless things get critical, then they’ll be forced to operate. Meanwhile, the oncologist mentioned that after surgery, he’d be moved to a palliative care unit. It seems clear they've essentially given up on him; they aren't even trying to intervene anymore.

And we're left standing here, completely lost, wondering what direction to turn or what can even be done at this stage.

Look, colon cancer is a sneaky bastard. In the early stages, there are almost no symptoms. For men over 50, prevention means an annual colonoscopy, but hardly anyone actually follows through with that. I see you're active in alternative circles, and regarding that, it's all five stars; the search function on the Forum is finally working, so just look through the posts from the members you communicate with... If the father-in-law were in a better state, maybe Breuss could happen, but with him, weight loss is inevitable regardless of nutritional intake. Personally, I wonder how much he could even handle right now, especially when you factor in the pain. Besides, how would you manage Breuss while the father-in-law is in the hospital? Do you even have the circumstances to be home?
Honestly, both I and many others on this thread understand exactly what you and your wife are going through—that sheer mountain of frustration when everything is just speculation about what *might* be done, while in reality, nothing is known and you're constantly just waiting. But in these situations, there really is nothing else to do but live one day at a time and see how things unfold.

Linda Fox2 said:I’m just talking to myself here, I suppose, but I need to get this out. They managed to schedule an appointment in Aviano for May 30th, and the cancer clinic mentioned they would provide a second opinion as soon as the pathology report comes back (in about 10 days), because without that, they can't say anything definitive. They also said they'll bring everyone in to assess his general condition.

But now my husband is calling me because my father-in-law is vomiting something brown, and the doctor says—based on experience—that it's part of the liver failing. Does that mean he's already in the terminal phase? He’s also been a complete wreck mentally over the last two days, and he says he's in constant Pain.😢
The question is whether he will even be physically capable of making it to the appointment in Aviano in five days. Is it even possible that we've gone from finding out the diagnosis to having no help left in just three weeks?

If he is physically able to make it to Italy, take him. Given the distant metastases, this is undoubtedly Stage IV—the final stage—though every individual's timeline varies. A full cure at this point would, unfortunately, be nothing short of a miracle. At this stage, the goal shifts entirely toward trying to ensure whatever quality of life and pain management remains. I wanted to ask you: what was the basis for the doctors deciding he was too weak for chemo? For instance, some patients have poor blood counts that can be corrected, or they might just need a transfusion, etc. But seeing this vomiting, I suspect it truly doesn't matter anymore... just stay by his side as much as you can right now, and try to distract him from all of this as much as possible.

Linda Fox2 said:So, what's the move now?

What is your father-in-law's actual mental state right now? How much does he even understand about the diagnosis? People often struggle to handle chemotherapy, so perhaps being in a familiar environment might make things slightly easier for him. If you were to move his care to Chicago, would anyone actually be able to visit him at the hospital at least every other day? Just looking at the logistics—I highly doubt they’d keep him hospitalized between individual chemo cycles, so how difficult or easy would it be for you to drive him to Chicago for every single cycle? Where would he stay during those gaps? And if he stayed home in San Francisco, what happens if things go south and you run into some idiot doctor who refuses to see him just because he moved his care to Chicago?

I'm not asking these questions to audit your choices, but rather to give you something to chew on—ideas to help you weigh your options while making this decision. Perhaps looking at it this way will make the "right" path a bit clearer for your family.

@Crazydiamond, I don't have any personal experience dealing with that specific type of tumor, but based on what I know about other cases handled at the Cancer Institute, I wish you nothing but the best. It really all depends on which doctor you end up with; some can be incredibly knowledgeable, while others tend to be cold, detached, or just plain blunt. Still, they are undeniably efficient and proactive. Personally, if I were back in the States after everything we've been through, they would be my very first choice for treatment.

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@Linda Fox2 I am not entirely sure where the absolute best place to seek treatment in Chicago is, but if you are looking for a second opinion or perhaps just some guidance and direction, I would highly recommend Dr. Cepulic in Chicago. He runs a private practice, and I believe consultations run around $200. You are welcome to bring whoever you need if they are up for it, though you can certainly go alone as long as you have your medical records in hand. The man actually takes his time; he explains things thoroughly, and he is truly worth every recommendation.
Prognoses are such an ungrateful thing to deal with—you can find just about anything online, but one must remain aware that a prognosis is nothing more than a statistic. So much depends on the patient's own willpower and mental fortitude in a situation like this. My mother actually beat the odds for about 80% of people in her exact position, but then again, she was incredibly stubborn and unshakeable. She had a difficult life from puberty all the way until the end, so she viewed this as just another hurdle to clear. Last winter, she told me she viewed that cancer as nothing more than a common flu—fine, it’s here, it isn't going away, but I won't let it touch me any more than necessary.

@velvettrucker7 if you ever discover a way, please let me know... while my mother was still alive, I focused entirely on being happy and grateful for what we had. I tried to be by her side as much as humanly possible. If it hadn't been for my pregnancy complications, I wouldn't have been able to be there when she passed, and for that, I am thankful. From here to eternity, I regret that she didn't get even a few more months to see her grandchild arrive, because I know how much she looked forward to that. As for whether I will ever reconcile with the sheer irresponsibility and negligence of certain doctors—I honestly don't know. I’ve written about this before; Mom did her annual check-ups—chest X-rays, ultrasounds, mammograms—because she had stage 97 breast cancer (mastectomy, chemo, radiation), and everything seemed fine until one year they found "something" in her lungs. For the next years, they kept insisting that "something" was just a scar from tuberculosis (neither she nor anyone in our family remembers ever having TB, but the doctor immediately points to that as the cause). Her cough was "surely due to GERD," her nail issues were "surely fungal," the pain in her shoulder was attributed to spinal problems, and for about a year to eighteen months, the lumps on her neck were dismissed as enlarged lymph nodes or fatty deposits that "didn't even require a biopsy" (this involved several different doctors at the Lung Clinic and at the Rib, so it wasn't just one person messing up). After losing a few years, here we are at Jordan, where that "scar" has turned out to be Stage IV lung cancer, with neck metastases fused to the nerves; the cough, the shoulder pain, and the nail issues were all symptoms of lung cancer. That was only the beginning of the "it could have been different" nightmare, which all unfolded over three and a half years, but I won't go into further detail... Even if I had the money to sue them and drag them through the courts, it won't bring my mother back. Tomorrow would have been her 62nd birthday if she were still here; in three months, it will be two years since she's been gone. I am becoming increasingly convinced that you simply learn to live with this cocktail of grief, bitterness, disappointment, and mistrust, but it is something that never truly disappears.

Raymond Smith53 said:My observation regarding wait times wasn't directed specifically at them—because if you actually ask the patient or their family, they’d say it’s always "immediately"—but rather at those who were supposed to get things done on schedule. To be precise, I understand why there's a wait for a PET scan; it comes down to the logistics of radioactive tracers that decay incredibly fast. In our case, they're delivered by Pfizer, and they only supply a handful of doses—maybe seven or eight—per machine per day, strictly because of the material's half-life and the fact that the entire procedure takes quite a while. Having been through a PET scan myself, I've talked to people and I know exactly where the bottleneck lies. A standard CT, on the other hand, can be performed without any issues at all. That’s why I wrote what I did.

Sure, a standard CT can be done immediately—granted—but it really depends on the hospital. Unfortunately, our healthcare system is in such a state that you sometimes find yourself waiting even for the simplest procedures. Honestly, my mother was treated as an inpatient and still had to wait three weeks just for a CT scan. When she needed follow-up CT scans, they would sometimes schedule her six to eight weeks out, even when going through internal hospital referrals. I don't want to badmouth doctors; I believe there are good, bad, and mediocre ones everywhere, just like anywhere else. But the reality remains: our healthcare system is fundamentally broken in certain areas, and patients are the ones paying the price.
When I was in Austria, I needed an MRI. I booked it on Thursday afternoon for Sunday morning. Usually, when dealing with state-run healthcare, there are no special connections required and no out-of-pocket costs; everything is handled with a basic referral. I had my results within two days. The entire system is organized differently over there; it certainly has its own flaws and shortcomings, but when you need an exam, you get it almost immediately.

Raymond Smith53 said:To be perfectly honest, these results are a total mess. To even discuss whether something is "operable," you have to know where the primary tumor actually is. Did they write anything more at the end of the report? Based on this, I can't see where the primary site is located (though personally, the liver looks most affected), but unfortunately, it seems to have spread everywhere. Lungs, lymph nodes in both the chest and lower areas, the liver, bones... Looking at what’s written here, the most significant changes are in the abdomen, so the tumor is likely there. Tumor markers themselves aren't particularly reliable anyway, especially not at the beginning, and certainly not once everything starts spreading. It is incredibly difficult to target chemotherapy at metastases if you don't even know what originally metastasized. I hate to say it, but as a layperson, this situation looks extremely serious to me. I still find it strange that you waited so long, because from what I can tell (if I'm not mistaken), you went for a standard CT rather than a PET scan. In emergency cases, a standard CT should practically be done the same day (which is why one must insist on hospitalization for severe cases if the doctors don't arrange it themselves). At least that was my experience, but that's the least important part of the story right now...

And perhaps you were just lucky in your case. (Forgive me, I'm not sure if you are male or female.)
From what I've been following, the father-in-law of our forum member has been hospitalized, and given the hospitalization, this is the fastest they could manage to get things moving. They are in San Francisco, and I had an identical experience with the waiting games and delays—even just for a standard CT in Chicago. Over the course of three and a half years, my mother had to go to a PET-CT that doctors from the Cancer Institute sent her to last year, after the people over at Jordan for three years couldn't manage it despite all our efforts. The folks at the Institute were absolutely livid about the whole thing and couldn't say enough bad things about the ones at Jordan, while those at Jordan were actually perfect and I'm grateful to them for a hundred other things. Not to mention our experience with the hospital in New York, where they couldn't even manage to set a diagnosis; instead, they wasted months rambling about fatty deposits on the neck when we were clearly dealing with metastases fused to the cervical nerves.
Given that, I think your assessment regarding the wait is a bit harsh toward someone who is new to this world, especially considering they only managed to convince the father-in-law to see a doctor after a month. You can't exactly dictate terms to a man who is still of sound mind, and naturally, he attributes his pain to his own age, much like most older people who are aware of their "expiration date."

@Linda Fox2/">@@Linda Fox2: The fact remains that these results are a chaotic mess; you know it has spread, but you don't know exactly what you're fighting. If chemo is used, it will be palliative chemotherapy—the kind intended to extend the patient's quality of life for as long as possible and, of course, reduce the metastases. For the bones, maybe radiation could be an option, though I doubt it given the description in the findings. As for surgery—it isn't clear from the report where the primary tumor is, so there's no way to know what would theoretically even be operated on. Furthermore, without a concrete diagnosis, I don't see the point in sending a sick person to Chicago, unless you have specific connections there to pull strings so the results come back faster or something. If this is colon cancer, the whole situation looks grim. I haven't dealt with that specific type of cancer, but if you are going to send your father-in-law somewhere, look into the doctors' reputations rather than just aiming for Chicago and gambling on whoever happens to take you.

Linda Fox2 said:I have no idea why they’re making her wait so long for the CT scan; apparently, that’s the earliest available slot. Personally, I feel like she’s waiting far too long. It’s going to take ten days just to get a concrete diagnosis and actually start treatment. We are all just waiting on this CT so we can transfer her to Chicago immediately, but since we don't know exactly what we're dealing with yet, we don't even know which hospital to move her to.

I don't know exactly which marker it is. I'm just getting updates from my husband, who doesn't see the actual results himself because the oncologist refers everything through the information briefings. Generally speaking, her reaction to how high those markers are is that this isn't good at all.

I'm afraid the situation isn't looking great. They are ready to fight, but somehow everything feels like it's moving in slow motion.

Has anyone else here had a patient use CBD oil?

From the moment we were admitted to the hospital, we waited about three weeks for a definitive diagnosis in Chicago, so I wouldn't count on any kind of speed. It would have taken even longer if she hadn't been an inpatient; being in the hospital allowed her to secure earlier appointments. Back then, she went through two CT scans, a bronchoscopy, and I won't even begin to count the X-rays and blood tests.

We used the oil, almost from the very beginning. Doctors gave Mom about six months to live,
but she lived for more than three and a half years, and they were quite good years. During the last six months, bigger issues arose, but despite that, she was about 80% independent and 100% lucid. Of course, unofficially, doctors told us on several occasions that the oil was the only explanation for how much the disease had plateaued for so long.
I wanted to introduce beta-glucan right away, but after talking with the League Against Cancer (who are absolutely open to alternative options), we decided against it. The reasoning was that while beta-glucan definitely has an impact, it can be a double-edged sword; instead of stimulating healthy cells to multiply and regenerate, it could just as easily stimulate the tumor cells. We know plenty of positive stories regarding beta-glucan, but we didn't dare take the risk.
Also, there are supposedly some very good success stories with Brezov therapy—personally, we only knew one person who tried it twice, but there was no success whatsoever.

Given that the whole situation doesn't sound particularly promising, I would certainly wait for the final diagnosis before deciding if it's worth the risk of trying to source the oil. It is incredibly difficult to find the real thing, and there are so many scammers out there. There is a lot of money at stake, and despite all the advertisements and anecdotes, the oil itself isn't a magic cure-all.

Linda Fox2 said:Thanks for the response. I forgot to mention that upon his admission to the hospital, they performed an abdominal ultrasound, which showed clusters on the liver. However, the complicating factor was that his abdomen was apparently full of gas, so the visibility wasn't great. That's just how my husband describes it; I haven't actually seen any of the lab results since he was admitted.

The Oncologist also suspects the primary issue is located in the abdomen. She didn't specifically mention the pancreas. The lung markers are high, but the abdominal markers are even higher (I don't know the exact values, but my husband mentioned something north of 4000).

He truly had no symptoms at all until about a month and a half ago when those lumps appeared on his back. Is it possible for metastases to develop there? How much is that related to the bone sheath—if I remember correctly? If it is pancreatic cancer, from what I've been reading, that isn't a good scenario at all. Although it says one common indicator is elevated blood glucose, his glucose levels are perfectly normal.

There can be issues on the back like you described involving that sheath, but my mother had them on her back too, which seemed like subcutaneous metastases—first one large one, then a few small ones, and eventually they were everywhere in different sizes. Regardless, unfortunately, the situation isn't looking good... I want to wish you all a lot of strength. Please, just come here with your questions. Everyone we know will help as much as we possibly can. 🙂