Red flags and manipulation in relationships
in Psychology ·
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Red flags and manipulation in relationships
in Psychology ·
Hi everyone, I’m reaching out because I really hope someone here can help me make sense of this..
I broke up with my boyfriend about two weeks ago—I just told him I couldn't keep doing this anymore. We hadn't even seen each other in two weeks, and he wouldn't even call; he would just leave my messages on read... I just couldn't take it, especially since I had fallen so hard for him.
So, here's the thing. I called him last night just to say I didn't want us to end up hating each other—there's honestly no reason for that. We aren't the first couple to go through a breakup, after all. But while we were talking, he just started attacking me. He said some truly horrible things. He called me a total nympho—claiming I have a sex addiction—and said he couldn't even hold a conversation with me because, in his words, "I can't put two sentences together." He tried to blame me for the breakup, even suggesting I pay guys to hook up with me because I supposedly can't help myself. It was incredibly insulting, and it really hurt. I am definitely not an addict; we were just a normal couple having a relationship, and we were together for a year. I guess I just want to know why some men feel such a desperate need to belittle and insult women. I never said a single mean word to him—when we split, I spent days stuck in my room just crying over him. He really meant everything to me... I'm honestly just heartbroken realizing who I actually fell for. I would have done anything for him. I even lent him $100 when he was completely tapped out. I'm a college student and don't have a job yet, whereas he works, but he'd already blown through all his money. So, I lent him those last $100 straight from my own pocket—and of course, he never paid me back. Honestly, the money isn't even what's bothering me. I'm just struggling to understand why I deserved to be treated like that?!?!? Why did he feel the need to pin all the blame on me????
I broke up with my boyfriend about two weeks ago—I just told him I couldn't keep doing this anymore. We hadn't even seen each other in two weeks, and he wouldn't even call; he would just leave my messages on read... I just couldn't take it, especially since I had fallen so hard for him.
So, here's the thing. I called him last night just to say I didn't want us to end up hating each other—there's honestly no reason for that. We aren't the first couple to go through a breakup, after all. But while we were talking, he just started attacking me. He said some truly horrible things. He called me a total nympho—claiming I have a sex addiction—and said he couldn't even hold a conversation with me because, in his words, "I can't put two sentences together." He tried to blame me for the breakup, even suggesting I pay guys to hook up with me because I supposedly can't help myself. It was incredibly insulting, and it really hurt. I am definitely not an addict; we were just a normal couple having a relationship, and we were together for a year. I guess I just want to know why some men feel such a desperate need to belittle and insult women. I never said a single mean word to him—when we split, I spent days stuck in my room just crying over him. He really meant everything to me... I'm honestly just heartbroken realizing who I actually fell for. I would have done anything for him. I even lent him $100 when he was completely tapped out. I'm a college student and don't have a job yet, whereas he works, but he'd already blown through all his money. So, I lent him those last $100 straight from my own pocket—and of course, he never paid me back. Honestly, the money isn't even what's bothering me. I'm just struggling to understand why I deserved to be treated like that?!?!? Why did he feel the need to pin all the blame on me????