That’s true, though finding people you can truly laugh with from the bottom of your heart is a rare thing. Most of the time, it’s just my pets that get me like that. :-)
I’d love to be able to laugh more often... but clearly, that just isn't my nature... unfortunately. It really is such a beautiful thing... so pleasant and relaxing..
I started taking it three times a day right away. For those first couple of days, I dealt with some dizziness, but after that, there weren't any other side effects—though I didn't feel much of anything besides a slight reduction in anxiety. As far as the depression goes, things actually felt a bit worse. I don't want to discourage you, though; I see others here who found relief, so I really hope it works for you too. Let me know how you get on... Greetings!
I struggle to understand why everyone is being so superficial about this... In my own experience, I once felt an incredible connection with someone, yet I chose to walk away for these exact reasons. I was struggling so much personally that I knew I couldn't provide what a partner deserves, nor could I contribute to the kind of deep, meaningful relationship that person earned. PERIOD. The guy is simply going through a rough patch; he's lost his sense of self and his confidence. He recognizes that she is a wonderful person, and perhaps her being so great actually makes him feel even worse about himself... If these are truly the reasons behind his decision, you have to respect it. It shows he is being honest with both himself and her... For her, the wisest path forward is to let him go. She needs to simply move on and let things be; only time will tell if he manages to get his head straight, and when that might happen.
You really think he isn't ready??!! And what about you? What are you doing to yourself?
Look, when that selfish jerk finally decides he is ready, just send him back his own words. That’s how you close the loop. Don't go chasing him either; you don't need that kind of baggage. If you give everything you have, you'll just end up feeling discarded and empty-handed. I know it hurts, but believe me, there is no real love here. He's just playing at being Mother Teresa—it's all sympathy and false compassion.
YOU CANNOT HELP HIM!!! At this stage, he doesn't even want to help himself.
stormymaker24 said:Well, hello there—I’ve been somewhat absent from the conversation lately. But I am back now.🙂
On a more positive note, the constant crying spells have finally subsided, and my mouth feels normal again; I suppose that is how the equilibrium is supposed to function.
However, my goodness, when you combine this with alcohol... last night I had two glasses of Bamboo. It was weak, half-and-half stuff. This is problematic because I am someone who usually requires half a liter of brandy just to feel a buzz, and I used to drink quite heavily in the past. Yet, after those mere two glasses, everything went sideways. When I arrived home, I heard something—someone said something to me that cut deep. I managed to blow the whole thing entirely out of proportion, spiraling into a paranoid state and weeping like a child for hours on end; I even felt a flicker of suicidality, which is something I have truly never experienced while in my right mind. Honestly, I don't think I have ever felt quite as wretched in my entire life as I did last night. I genuinely feared I wouldn't make it through the night to see the sunrise at the local hospital or end up in a morgue. I eventually drifted off from sheer exhaustion caused by the crying, and now I am suffering from a headache and a hangover so debilitating it feels unnatural.
To be fair, I hadn't eaten all day, so those two glasses likely hit me with the force of four, though I wasn't technically drunk. A friend of mine who previously dealt with ADHD told me that medication interacts terribly with alcohol, and she actually quit drinking altogether until her ADHD was under control, but I certainly didn't anticipate this level of volatility.
Looking back, I truly cannot find a logical reason for such an extreme mood swing. I mean, I have certainly endured bad episodes before, but typically people would have to say something far more egregious than what happened to trigger such a catastrophic narrative in my head. This was not normal. To top it all off, I am having a miserable few days where it feels like everything is hitting me from every direction at once. Ugh, well, I suppose it will pass eventually.
How are things on your end?
Things are okay—some good days, some bad. I don't feel like I've made any massive leaps forward, but I am doing better. I still deal with certain issues and occasional depressive dips or symptoms, but they hit much less intensely now. It's only been about five weeks, so I'm hoping things stabilize more over time. As for the alcohol, I cut it out completely as soon as I started Coaxil, since that's specifically used for alcohol cravings... so it's really no wonder you felt that way. And judging by your post, it looks like I won't be testing that theory myself either! :-)
That initial gut feeling is heavily influenced by your headspace at the moment. If you’re dealing with high stress or just feeling off, about half of that first impression is likely just a projection of your own state of mind... When I reflect on my first impressions—whether they're about a person or a situation—it feels like an all-or-nothing scenario. It's either spot on, or it turns out to be completely wrong... It can be quite difficult to pinpoint the exact line where a first impression ends and logic begins...
Well... they aren't helping me at all; if anything, I feel even worse than before. I thought I’d just give it some time to work. But here we are, nearly a month later, and I feel completely numb. I'm not sure if I should keep waiting, but honestly, my depression is much deeper now. While the anxiety has eased up slightly, it hasn't vanished, and I just feel strange—as if I have this massive pile of emotions trapped inside me, yet there's a shield surrounding me that I can't break through to express them. For instance, I can't even cry, which feels like being stuck in a fog; I feel like I'm going to burst, but nothing comes out. I just feel blunt and empty.
I feel a sense of regret that I didn't overcome this sooner. It has reached a point where it feels like a permanent way of life; I’ve carried this anxiety within me for far too long. It has fundamentally altered who I am, shifting my entire self-perception. My confidence has hit rock bottom, and while I truly want to rebuild it, the process feels incredibly difficult and exhausting.
I also dealt with some pretty intense dizziness for about two or three days, but that seems to have cleared up now. For a few mornings, I actually felt great—almost a sense of light euphoria—but lately, it feels like things have just plateaued for the past week. It’s just been a steady climb from there. I'm hoping this is just the lull before the medication finally kicks in for real. I honestly don't care; I could take these medications for the rest of my life if I have to. It’s nothing compared to the actual suffering I've endured. You only get one shot at this life, and after realizing I wasted eight of my best years trapped in that hell, I refuse to let it happen again.
It’s also about how symptoms manifest physically. It becomes this constant cycle of catastrophe—headaches, bladder issues, back pain, shortness of breath, or just random sharp pains. I’m perpetually tense, and eventually, all that strain just drags me straight into depression.
Working on myself... well, I understand the theory behind it all, but applying it is a different story when you're being overwhelmed by physical sensations. My primary focus is just trying to get rid of the symptoms themselves. By the time I deal with that, I have zero energy left to actually function, especially when I need to be out in public. I don't quite follow that part; I used to be quite the social butterfly, and honestly, I think I still am at heart, but this constant tension makes being around people feel incredibly uncomfortable.
I’ve been digging through some research on Coaxil, and apparently, doses can be bumped up to 200 mg daily. Honestly, everything I’ve managed to find about this medication feels a bit sparse; it’s such an unusual drug, and the way it actually works is almost the reverse of what you'd expect, which I find quite fascinating. I’m currently taking it three times a day as well... As for that part about fighting this battle alone for five years—I relate to that completely, though in my case, I’d add another three years to the tally 😁
Self-improvement is a given, but I was actually referring to how these tablets work. It seems like there aren't many people online using them lately... so, what made you decide to get them?
It’s honestly tough to hear. Since you’re about a week ahead of me, I’ll be watching your progress to see how things unfold so we can compare notes... For example, during my first week, I dealt with dizziness, then felt like I was actually improving in the second week, but now, in this third week, the anxiety has hit me hard—I was practically sobbing all day today! It feels as though my external reactions to stress are becoming shorter or more superficial, yet that underlying tension remains just as heavy on the inside.
Most medication leaflets claim you'll start feeling the effects within two weeks, but in reality, it rarely works quite like that. For instance, I’ve been on my current dose for exactly three weeks now and I feel like absolute crap today. It’s hard to tell if there's any actual progress because I'm dealing with both emotional lows and intimacy issues, which makes everything feel much heavier. If anything, I just feel slightly more muted, but I can't really say if that's the medicine working or just me feeling numb. I was hoping to hear from someone who has personally used Wellbutrin and could share their own experience. Anyone?
I was wondering if anyone here takes Wellbutrin for anxiety and depression, and how long it typically takes before you start noticing a real difference? I'd love to hear about your experiences—what things were like for you beforehand, what led you to start the medication, and how it eventually changed things for you.
Honestly, you remind me of my younger self. I used to be just as convinced that committing to a single person was a mistake because one individual simply can't possibly meet every single expectation or fulfill every need... and honestly, that part is true. But the other side of the coin is that we don't actually have the right to demand that from anyone; it’s just too much to ask of one person. That’s why we have other people in our lives to fill those gaps. While finding that one perfect person would be the dream, realistically... well, life happens. We shouldn't place such heavy demands and expectations on a single partner; it isn't fair.
There is honestly no need to tell her; there's simply no reason to... and truthfully, speaking up now would be nothing but brutal, destructive, and pointless. If it’s in the past, just move forward. It happened once, a long time ago. One day you'll look back and realize you did the right thing by everyone—by staying silent to protect them from that pain, and by protecting yourself from the unnecessary heartache that comes with it. I really am quite wise.🤣🤣