Good grief, how many pages have been added since yesterday... I’m sitting here reading through all this and I can't help but laugh because it reminds me of that one grumpy little Smurf from the old cartoons.
It’s driving me crazy because, honestly, my mother-in-law is a total sweetheart. She wants to come visit us for a few days, but she won't pick a time that actually works for our schedule—she just picks when it suits *her*. Since I'm currently on leave, I really don't have the energy to be playing hostess and cooking up feasts, even though she isn't even expecting it. But let's be real: I feel terrible about it. I know deep down I’ll end up doing it anyway, even though I shouldn't, simply because she only visits twice a year and she's such a wonderful guest. I told my husband quite clearly that he needs to handle the logistics and coordinate with her for a time that fits our lives. I definitely don't want it to look like I'm the one being difficult or refusing to see her. It feels like a constant game of tactical maneuvering just to make sure nobody gets their feelings hurt or thinks the wrong thing. Honestly, it’s exhausting dealing with everyone's sensitivities!
It’s like everyone is trying to "help" me by making decisions for me, but no thanks, people—just let me live my life! And what am I supposed to do? This woman grew up in a small rural town where you're up at the crack of dawn; she isn't going to spend her whole trip rummaging through my kitchen cabinets. Should I set my alarm for 6:00 AM just to brew coffee? Grrrr! The thing is, she is incredibly low-maintenance and doesn't ask for a single thing. But once you have a guest in the house, you feel that weight of obligation. When I try to explain all of this to my husband, I end up feeling like a complete villain.
I have to brag for a second—my husband is the only one who isn't driving me absolutely crazy right now! When he’s off the clock, he’s glued to my side 😍. He’s constantly checking in, worried about whether there are any complications, even though we've been dealing with little hiccups from the very start. On the days when he’s at work, I’m mostly flying solo, just waiting for him to walk through the door . Honestly, you get what you teach them, right? 🥳 Now that my bump has really started showing over the last week, he’s become totally obsessed with it. It’s like he’s fascinated by it! He follows me around the house, staring from every possible angle. I feel like I have to pace around the living room or lift up my shirt just to give him a better view—it’s as if he’s only just realized that I’m actually pregnant! 😁
My mom calls me every single day, and it’s always the same thing: "Oh, what yummy treats did you eat today?" She uses this tone that makes me feel like I'm five years old!🙄 And honestly, she never used to talk to me like that before. So then I have to tell her, "Hey, why are you talking to me like that? I'm not a toddler!" (By the way, if you didn't catch that, I'm pregnant!😁 ) Then it goes: "Well, since you're on maternity leave, what do you want to eat? What can I cook for you or bring over?" And my answer is always a resounding NOPE. Like, seriously, NOTHING. Then she calls back later saying, "I made this and that, and I'm bringing it over." It takes her an hour and a half to drive from the other side of town, and she ends up making me feel incredibly guilty—even though I know she doesn't mean to. I hadn't planned on anyone visiting at all, so maybe ask for my opinion first? It gets even worse when she says, "I'll just leave it there so we aren't bothering you."🙄 Yeah, right! Just leave it on the porch and don't bother stepping foot inside the house.
Then she starts getting all intense about what I need. I was like, "What could I possibly need?" and she jumps straight to baby bedding. 😠😠 Seriously, who needs fancy bedding? I already told her I want high-quality stuff, and it's not like I want to spend my life ironing sheets. When she suggested, "Well, I can come over and iron them for you,"😠 😠...can you imagine? Calling my own mother to come over and iron my sheets? No way. I told her quite firmly that it wasn't going to happen—though sometimes she actually hits the mark. It's the exact same thing with my grandma from the Midwest; she keeps insisting on making these feather pillows for the twins. I'm like, "No thanks, but absolutely NOT!"
Also... I've gained two pounds in just one week.😲😢 And I haven't been overeating! My stomach has definitely popped out, but I'm only 19 weeks along. Is that normal? I'm still technically two pounds under my starting weight, but this feels totally weird. I'd love to believe it's all just going straight to my belly!😛
Adam Evans62, I honestly feel like you should just completely tune out any relatives when it comes to this stuff and stop sharing those kinds of details with them altogether. For instance, if they start pestering you about what you're naming the baby, just tell them you're still totally undecided and stuck in limbo. It’s much better than dealing with the headache of everyone's unsolicited opinions and reactions.
I know plenty of people who just had babies and didn't even settle on a name for several days after the birth.😁
On a side note, I am currently in a total bind! I have to narrow my list down to two names, but I don't even have a single boy's name on there yet.🙄 (Since I don't know the gender yet), the interrogation starts immediately: "What's your top choice?" "Which one do you like better?" Blah, blah, blah... look, people, I simply do not knooooow!
Honestly, I think it is completely out of line to bring up weight when talking to pregnant women. I usually make it a point never to comment on anyone's size because I know how sensitive that can be for most people, let alone someone going through pregnancy
I felt like everyone was losing their minds over me because I lost quite a bit of weight early on due to morning sickness. They acted like I was doing it on purpose—as if I were choosing to have an eating disorder! Hello, people? I’m just pregnant! It's a lose-lose situation, really...
If there is actually a medical issue with my weight, I trust my doctor to handle it and step in accordingly.
Now, I’ve started using a little defense mechanism: whenever someone makes a snide remark or gets something wrong about my health, I just jokingly threaten them with gestational diabetes.🤣
It honestly drives me up the wall when everyone suddenly acts like an expert on my life! When it came to the gender, we actually wanted to be surprised at first. We were really looking forward to that big reveal, but since we’re expecting twins, we decided to skip the suspense and just find out.😁 The thing is, my extended family seems to have a mental calendar of all my doctor's appointments (!). I’ll mention a date in passing, and I swear they probably jot it down in a planner somewhere.🤣 Then, like clockwork, everyone starts blowing up my phone, calling left and right to ask if we've heard anything yet. Seriously, guys—take a chill pill! Give us some breathing room; we promise we’ll let you know once we actually know. Oh, and get this: someone actually had the nerve to ask if we even intended to tell them once we found out. (Just like that other post mentioned!) No, of course not—we're planning to lock the results in a high-security vault at Fort Knox and hire a private security detail to make sure nobody gets anywhere near the paperwork.🙄
Olivia Miller2, you should totally just tell them everything next time. You know, play it cool. Just say something like, "Oh my goodness, you two look so much more rested since the last time we saw you, it's wonderful!" It sounds like a lovely compliment, but deep down, you're totally shutting them down.
Even though I’m strictly vegetarian, I make it a point never to lecture anyone about their diet. mm is a total meat-lover,😁 and honestly, I don't see why he should give me a hard time about my choices, nor should I bother him about his. He didn't even say a word to me when I found out I was pregnant. I live by a pretty simple rule: live your life and let everyone else live theirs.
It’s funny how once you become pregnant, suddenly you're treated like some sort of public utility—everyone feels entitled to weigh in with their unsolicited opinions. I’m actually dreading the moment someone might get too handsy and reach for MY belly; they really won't be happy with my reaction. I’ve even toyed with the idea of designing a T-shirt for expectant moms featuring a big "stop" hand gesture and the words "Private Property."😛
By the way, I’ve been taking magnesium tablets from Nature Valley to help with uterine contractions, and they’ve been great.
This is such a great topic for venting some serious frustration!
Here goes nothing: It’s driving me crazy that I’ve spent the last three months dealing with constant morning sickness and basically isolating myself from the world, And then, on Tuesday, I found out I have to be on strict bed rest. It means I can't head to Ikea in Denver to pick up furniture for the nursery, I can't wander through downtown or hit the shops to enjoy picking out baby clothes, and I can't drive over to Austin to visit my friend who just moved into her new place. My whole spring road trip is ruined, and my friend from the Midwest was supposed to visit for the first time, but now I won't be able to take her out for lunch or a movie... all my plans have just gone up in smoke. When the weather finally gets nice, I won't even be able to go for a stroll or sit on a park bench and soak up the sun. To top it off, my ultrasound isn't scheduled for another week, and I am absolutely losing my mind wondering if everything is okay. I'm terrified that things won't turn out fine, and honestly, I'm scared I won't have the strength to pull through this.
Then there's the constant stream of random baby name suggestions, and everyone telling me I need to start eating meat—even though I'm a vegetarian! Meanwhile, my blood work is perfect, including my iron levels, and unlike those "worrywarts" out there, I've never been sick before. I’ve consulted actual medical professionals, but apparently, relatives always know better than doctors. Or they tell me, "Just sleep now while you can," as if I can somehow sleep ahead of time for the future! As if! Like I can just bank sleep now and then never sleep again once the baby arrives... give me a break.
When I mention I'm having twins, people just go, "Ohhh, it's going to be so hard..." Yeah, thanks for the encouragement, really. And when I say I want a natural birth, I get comments like, "Wow, you're so brave." Like, what does that even mean? Just weird.
The advice "just eat, it doesn't matter if you're throwing up, something will stick" is so incredibly annoying,🙄 As if they could just keep eating normally whenever they have a stomach bug!
So yeah... again, this is a fantastic topic for venting.🤣
Betty Bailey66 said:My gynecologist is actually a family friend. Honestly, there’s something strangely comforting about lying on that exam table while he asks, "So, how's your mom doing?" He’s a fantastic doctor, even if his sister is always a bit prickly. Meanwhile, the other doctor in their practice is constantly finding some random yeast infection or fungal issue—it doesn't matter if you have perfectly balanced pH levels; she’ll swoop in with those intense vaginal treatments and just wipe out every single microbe down there, good or bad! It’s like Batman and Robin, but one is a hero and the other is a total wrecking crew.
😂 My mom was telling me about this one time she hadn't seen her longtime gynecologist in ages. She’s sitting there on the table, looking at him like, "I don't know if you even remember me," and he takes one look down and just nods, "Oh, I definitely remember you." 🤣
I honestly cannot believe this! Mothers are supposed to be our biggest supporters... instead, they're acting like this—good grief, what a mess... Look, ladies, my advice is simple: either just go along with it without saying a word to avoid starting a pointless fight—since it’s pretty obvious they aren't going to change their minds anyway—or, like someone else mentioned earlier, just firmly stand your ground and insist that this is your life and your business.
For context, I started a long-term relationship at a very young age, and my mom isn't exactly naive... She actually told me, "Sweetie, why don't you go see a gynecologist for a checkup so you can talk everything through?" She even went ahead and booked an appointment with a private specialist and handled all the details for my very first exam, where I ended up getting a recommendation for birth control pills and everything else.