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Honestly, if you're looking for an answer to all those ridiculous questions you guys keep asking, this specific episode of South Park is basically the ultimate guide!
Season 10, Episode 10 (Miss Teacher Bangs a Boy)
I was just listening to the radio this morning and honestly, I’m just sitting here floored by what I’m hearing...
The autopsy report claims that 17-year-old Miroslav Tunjić passed away from injuries sustained after a car plowed into him while he was already lying on the ground being beaten. Even so, the two attackers who were pummeling him have been taken into custody on attempted murder charges.
But here’s the kicker—the reporter actually says "but"!
It’s absolutely unbelievable to me. The entire tone of the legal reporting is basically, "Well, at least they didn't technically kill him; a car ran him over instead."
By that logic, if I tie someone to the tracks, I should only be charged with attempted murder because, hey, I didn't kill them—the train did!
It’s like saying, "Oh, it wasn't a person who killed him, it was just a bullet to the forehead." 👎