7 posts shown.
hollowmason64 said:But for heaven's sake, you can't just go after someone with an execution if the bills aren't even in their name.
And honestly, the craziest part is they’re trying to pin this on someone who wasn't even registered at that address during that timeframe. Under what kind of law would that even hold up in court? What kind of judge would actually sign off on an execution like that? 😕
So, let's break this down—it’s a bit of a mess, isn't it? We have one person listed, but then there's this other individual who was also officially registered at the address back then... Let me try to clarify the situation for you. Essentially, we are looking at a father who moved out and left the household entirely back in 2012. Now, the actual owner of the property is the mother, but—and here is the kicker—the warning notice regarding the execution is being issued in the names of both the father and the adult child. Talk about a headache! Given that the legal ownership doesn't even match the names on the notice, what would be the smartest move here? What's the best way to handle this legal knot?
So, I’ve been looking over these notices, and honestly? It makes absolutely no sense! They’re sending out two different amounts—it's almost like they decided to just split the total right down the middle and send half to each person... but why?! And here is what really trips me up—if they’re being so "clever" about splitting things up, why on earth didn't they just list my mother on the paperwork? She’s the actual owner of the property! It feels totally illogical—I mean, seriously, where is the reasoning there? Since we live in such a small town where everyone knows everyone else's business, I can't help but wonder if they think this approach will make it easier to squeeze the debt out of my father? Or—and this is the part that really gets me—is it some sort of roundabout way to pressure us kids into paying at least a portion if he doesn't come through? I don't know... I am just completely lost on the logic here!
rowdyraven112 said:First off, how sure are you that these are actually notices before execution and not the actual executions themselves? As for whether an execution can hit a second person—yes, it can. But explaining the specific conditions for that is a waste of time because you described your situation like a fifth-grader writing their very first homework assignment.
I realize I didn't explain myself very clearly, but I was just trying to be careful about not sharing too much personal info... Why am I so sure it isn't an actual execution order? Because both documents explicitly state "notice prior to execution"!
Here’s the situation—and I am genuinely curious if anyone here has the legal insight to make sense of this mess! So, we have someone who lived in a household where all the utility bills were officially under their name—including the municipal services for the city they resided in (not New York City, by the way)—and now they are moving out. Suddenly, a notice regarding a 2008 writ of execution arrives for unpaid utility fees from back in 2011, a year when those bills were strictly tied to that specific individual. But wait, it gets even weirder! The city is actually sending out two separate notices for that same year: one addressed to the person whose name was actually on the account, and a second one addressed to another adult living in the house—someone who was never registered as the account holder, isn't the homeowner, and was simply an adult member of the household. How is that even legally permissible? It seems like the city is just trying to squeeze money out of anyone they can find, but how can they issue a notice for execution to someone who wasn't even on the bill to begin with? They even included a specific payment slip with that person's full name on it! Does this mean that utility bills and subsequent notices for execution can be sent to any random adult living in the house, regardless of whether they are the actual account holder?
Personally, I am a huge believer in being kind—truly, deeply kind—to everyone we meet. Even toward those who aren't particularly nice to us, right? And heaven knows we should certainly be kind to people who are objectively decent human beings! But honestly, following that philosophy to its extreme has landed me in social circles where I feel like nobody actually *knows* me or even appreciates me. I don't feel like an equal in those relationships, let alone comfortable; it feels as though my warmth, my kindness, and my softness are constantly being mistaken for mere weakness or being a pushover.
Sometimes, it is just impossible to pinpoint exactly why you feel so drained at the end of an interaction. Is it because you simply don't click with the group and lack common ground—making everything feel forced and awkward (which seems to be the case here)? Or maybe you feel like someone is emotionally leaching off you, dumping all their baggage onto your shoulders? Sometimes it’s that sinking feeling that people are only hanging out with you because their "real" friends are busy—you know the type, where they treat you like their best friend for two days when they're lonely, only to completely forget you exist once their other plans fall through. Other times, it’s a clash of core values or life stances that we hold dear, or perhaps it’s their condescending, arrogant attitude toward us. And sometimes, people just don't get it! There are a thousand reasons, but when we are in the company of certain people, they act like absolute energy vampires. I truly believe this; after spending time with them, instead of feeling bright and happy, you just feel hollowed out, pathetic, and exhausted! It doesn't actually matter what the specific reason is—if we aren't enjoying ourselves, we need to walk away. It’s exactly like staying in a bad relationship. We get to choose our friends and our partners, and I firmly believe we have every right to do so.
I was honestly appalled by some of the comments attacking that young woman... If he isn't enjoying her company, why stay? But to just snap at her and tell her straight to her face that being around her is uncomfortable or exhausting? I don't know. Some people are suggesting he should just tell her how draining she is, but I think that would hurt her even more and create unnecessary insecurities! She is likely a perfectly fine person who probably has other friends who genuinely love her company—it’s just that *he* doesn't vibe with her, and that should be that.
I have also made the decision to distance myself from certain relationships—at least enough to thin out my contact list, my coffee dates, and my phone calls. And I’m doing this after years of unsuccessfully trying to avoid it, purely out of fear of hurting someone's feelings. Then, I finally took a moment to remember how many times *I* have been hurt and humiliated. Honestly, if you don't stand up for yourself and allow people to walk all over you, you're partly to blame. Every time something happened, I used to convince myself I had misread the situation, or that my "friends" were just looking out for my best interests. But then I finally decided to consider the alternative: maybe they aren't being sincere? Maybe they aren't, and regardless, I just don't mesh with them, and clearly, they don't understand me any better. But knowing the types of people I'm talking about, if I were to be honest about what bothers me, I would be labeled a complete lunatic! For instance, if I told someone, "I'm sorry, but when I share a problem that's weighing on me, it hurts when you respond with condescension or a smirk instead of empathy," I wouldn't dare say that to their face. Even when I desperately want to, I won't, because friends shouldn't act that way—I certainly don't act that way—and I feel like they would just attack me or call me "weird." I don't necessarily think they are bad people, but it bothers me enough that I no longer want them close. So, I will handle it in a neutral way to avoid causing pain, by gradually phasing them out. Perhaps it sounds selfish, but I truly believe it is normal to be "selfish" in this context... I mean, if we wouldn't stay in a romantic relationship just because someone is "nice" while we feel uncomfortable or "weird" around them, then breaking up would be considered selfish too, wouldn't it? It's all about how you handle the exit. Telling that girl, "Look, I feel awkward around you and I can't quite put my finger on why, but I'm just not comfortable," isn't necessarily the right move, nor is it necessarily moral just because it's 100% honest. That is your subjective impression of her and your relationship; there is no need to insult her or cause deep emotional damage that might leave her fearful of future friendships or worried that everyone finds her unpleasant. I know that if someone told me they felt "weird" around me, I would feel terrible about everyone else, too!
Joshua Gomez said:I honestly feel like my true self just... wandered off somewhere a long time ago and never looked back!
Oh, goodness no 🙂, it hasn't vanished entirely—it’s just gone a little astray, and you'll need to go out and find it again... It might take some patience and a bit of time, but I know you can do it!!
Joshua Gomez said:I don't even know how to thank you for what you wrote... and honestly, just for taking the time to put anything together at all! I guess, in the end, maybe I just need to find a way to accept that nothing is ever truly certain or set in stone. If I can wrap my head around that, maybe then I could actually function—you know, like, really live! My biggest struggle is just this overwhelming fear of everything, and when the panic hits, I just totally lose my footing. It gets so bad that I feel like I can't even think about anything else.
Oh goodness, now that I'm looking back at what I wrote more carefully—I was in such a rush and made so many typos and grammatical slips, sorry about that! But I'm glad you caught the heart of it... Believe me, nothing in Life is ever truly certain. Just think about the billions upon billions of people who have lived and died throughout history... trillions of human lives, and not one single person during their lifetime found a concrete, verified answer to the very questions you're asking right now. Is it normal to wonder about these things? Absolutely! But there are no answers—it’s just not our day, and unfortunately, it isn't anyone's day! I'd probably be the first person in line if I could finally grasp the true purpose and meaning behind all of this. But it hasn't been granted to us—and honestly, even if an answer were provided, it likely wouldn't be in a language our current human brains and consciousness could even comprehend... So, if you have even a semi-stable situation regarding your job or your family (even if they're far away from you), please, just enjoy life as much as you possibly can! Go ahead and ask those big questions from time to time; there is nothing wrong with that. In fact, because of those very questions, you'll eventually gain a different perspective on Life and the world around you—one that is unique and so much deeper...
I think I have a pretty good idea of how you’re feeling right now... It sounds like you've entered one of those intense phases where you just can't stop questioning everything—searching for that one concrete, definitive answer? You're looking for the actual reason behind our existence, aren't you? And once those thoughts take hold, they just haunt you. But please, listen to me: you aren't crazy. Why on earth would anyone be considered "crazy" for thinking this way? Believe me, there are so many people out there just like you. There are entire lives dedicated solely to trying to unmask that one truth. Honestly, even I am one of those people who can't go a single day without these kinds of thoughts drifting through my mind... And trust me, even many religious people go through these exact doubts. I was raised in a Catholic family where some people believe everything is laid out in such a simple, neat little package—but I know better! I think it's almost ridiculous; I feel like the Catholic Church, with all its rigid dogmas, creates a caricature of God because they try to take everything so literally instead of seeing the symbolism in it. Ultimately, though, the conclusion to all this soul-searching is that there simply isn't an answer. Brilliant scientists, deeply religious figures—millions of them over the centuries—have poured their entire lives into seeking the answer to the very question you're asking, and they haven't found it. No one can truly know who is right—is it the scientists, the priests, or someone else entirely? Personally, I think the answer is NO ONE. Truly, absolutely no one knows, and we will likely never know with 100% certainty during our lifetime whether our beliefs are actually correct... and who's to say we'll even get an answer after we die? What actually happens to us? Why hasn't anyone cracked the mystery of Life and death, or uncovered why the world around us is structured exactly the way it is? Nobody has figured it out, and nobody will for a long, long time. That is the space where a person has to find their own comfort. Sure, people hold onto certain beliefs that might seem rock-solid at first glance, but those beliefs are either superficial—just products of how they were raised in American tradition—or they cling to them because it makes life easier. Then there are the third group: the ones who genuinely try to believe, but if you sit down and talk to them, you'll see they have their own deep doubts and constant questioning too. There are no answers to these questions. NONE. We aren't granted those answers. All we are given is the chance to live and then to die; the rest is just a pair of shoes—we spend our lives walking a path that feels upside down, distorted, and frankly, quite unnatural. That’s why so many people are going through this kind of identity crisis lately. We aren't living in harmony with nature or even with ourselves. It feels abnormal for humans to even ask the questions you're asking! Because, apparently, we were "designed" to work ourselves to the bone for someone higher up in the corporate pyramid, earn money, spend it, build a consumerist family, spend more, and then eventually pass away—either buried under debt or surrounded by piles of stuff and cash that won't fit in a casket anyway. We spend the best parts of our days killing ourselves for money—just pieces of paper that some people decided held value, because apparently, you can't survive without it, for heaven's sake! That cannot, and should not, be the meaning of Life. The fact that you are asking these questions is proof to me that you are human, and those questions are perfectly normal. However, if they start to feel suffocating—if they're weighing too heavily on your mind—find a good psychologist to talk to. In the meantime, try to find some people you can chat with about your views on the world and everything else that's bothering you. Surely you have at least one friend who finds these things interesting? (Not that you should smother them with these topics every single time you meet, but maybe drift into them every once in a while...) Ideally, that person shouldn't be someone who thinks their worldview is the absolute, infallible truth. You need someone relaxed and kind, someone who actually thinks for themselves and is willing to listen and engage in a healthy conversation! Good luck!