7 posts shown.
Benjamin Taylor6 said:You've got a boyfriend and you love to travel. Honestly, what could be better? Tell everyone trying to nag you or force you into their little mold to just go jump in a lake!
I do, actually. And I love him immensely—I’d do absolutely anything for him. He truly is the finest
human being I have ever encountered; he possesses such a youthful soul and is just an incredibly sincere, loving person.
But this isn't really about him, it's about me. Though, I suppose no one would be happier
than if he were right there by my side during this search for... "that certain something." 🙂
steelnomad84 — owls are quite brilliant, I'll give you that. 😁 Personally, though, I'm more of a cat person; they possess the most colorful
range of expressions; they're just top-tier. 😍
edit: for instance—this face I make whenever my mother reminds me that my biological clock is going to start ticking much faster
over the next few years...
coastalhound58 said:I find myself in much the same position—I genuinely prefer my own company, mostly because I spend so much time buried in books. I need an enormous amount of solitary time just to recharge. It’s a strange paradox, I suppose; there are moments when I feel like I’m missing human connection, yet the second I actually find myself out in a crowd, all I can think about is getting back home, crawling under a warm blanket, and finally getting lost in a good book.🙄
I suppose I just retreat into this little world of my own making—a small, curated headspace where everything actually makes sense and feels a bit more beautiful than the reality we’re stuck with.
I find myself in agreement—I also struggle to define exactly what I want, though my list of what I refuse to tolerate is quite extensive. For instance, I have zero interest in being coddled, having arbitrary rules forced upon me, or dealing with anyone attempting to play boss—because, frankly, that is precisely when I tend to transform into a bit of a monster.
The only thing I know for certain would truly make me happy is traveling the world—but, unfortunately, I just don't have the means to make that happen right now.
I suppose I’d give just about anything if I could finally pinpoint exactly what it is I’m actually searching for—just so I could actually start moving toward it.
🙂
Are we even single individuals at this point? 😲🙂
Amanda Jackson5 said:Eventually, you’ll realize that the wanderlust is mostly just a metaphor. Someone once pointed out that the most profound journeys usually happen right between the four walls of your own room.
This is incredibly fascinating; I actually just experienced one of those sudden "aha!" moments myself. 🙂
Truly compelling stuff.
Since we’re already on the subject of "spamming," I feel like this video actually fits the vibe of this discussion quite well...
I wouldn't exactly call myself a social butterfly; I've always been more of a lone wolf...which leads to the strange irony that the larger the crowd, the
more isolated I tend to feel..it's a bit of a paradox, I know..
Honestly, thank you all from the bottom of my heart for the support and the advice. It is such a relief to finally talk to people who actually get it 🙂
I am just utterly exhausted by all these arbitrary rules—but honestly, it’s more than that. It’s the hatred, the discrimination, all those ugly social constructs that
drive a wedge between us. Sometimes I find myself staring out at this world we inhabit and just feeling overwhelmed. Everything seems to revolve around money; people are
judged solely by the size of their vacation homes or their job titles. I still remember when my dad made a comment about
this guy: "How can a man be any good if he wears shoes like those?" (The guy was wearing these beat-up, century-old sneakers because, frankly, he
couldn't care less about his footwear or how he looks to strangers). It genuinely broke my heart to hear him say that 😢 It is simply impossible
to squeeze any sense of openness out of certain types of people.
Everyone is so obsessed with cash and material possessions, acting as if they’re going to carry them into the grave with them.
I don't know exactly what it is I'm looking for... I just know that I'm not a lesbian 😁, that I will never give a damn about what Peter from the third floor thinks...
and that I want to travel—to see every single corner of this planet. I've always had this dream of living for one year at one
end of the world, then moving to another the next year, and so on. Just spinning the globe and letting my finger decide where my next home will be...
I don't know...
Benjamin Taylor6 said:That isn't depression. It’s just the search for meaning in life. And let me tell you, that is a complicated business. Plus, it’s deeply personal to every single one of us.
So, I suppose I am slowly drifting into the world of adulthood... assuming, of course, there is actually some kind of recipe out there for finding purpose.😢
If we’re talking psychology, someone please just relocate my entire existence to that subforum. Honestly, I might as well move over to the "depression" thread so I can transition from being a perfectly sane woman
into a complete lunatic, much like Nicholson in *One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest* 😁
Capsule — look, I wasn't trying to imply that I'm somehow "superior" to anyone else who thinks
or wants different things out of life... I just needed to vent a little... and perhaps confirm that I'm not drifting through this alone..
I honestly don’t even know where to begin. On paper, my life looks absolutely flawless—I’m young, I’ve got my head on straight, I’m nearly wrapping up my degree, I look decent enough, I’ve been in a stable relationship for several years now, and I have plenty of hobbies to keep me busy... Yet, for the last year or two, this creeping sense of emptiness and anxiety has started to settle in. I suspect it’s tied to the fact that I’m rapidly approaching that stage of life where society expects you to land a career, settle down, start a family, and just slide effortlessly into some "happily ever after" script. It is particularly grating when my parents start their usual litany of expectations: "Well, in two or three years, you'll probably have a baby, so you should start preparing... We need to start saving up for your wedding... You really need to find a job in your field," and so on and so forth. My best friend is following the exact same trajectory; she’s finishing up college and we spend our coffee dates discussing wedding guest lists, the struggle of the job hunt, and how she’ll likely have kids within the next couple of years...
🙂
It makes me wonder, what exactly are we? Are we just some kind of pre-programmed biological machines? Does anyone actually bother to ask if *I* want any of this? Why am I supposed to have a child just because it’s considered "normal" or because "that's what everyone does"? Why am I expected to marry and "settle down"? Whenever I pose these questions to my family, they look at me as if I’ve completely lost my mind—most of the time they just ignore me entirely and steamroll ahead with their lectures about how things "must" be done. Even when I was a little girl, I never played with baby dolls, I never spent my time daydreaming about a white wedding, and I never harbored any desire for children (and I certainly don't have any now). So why on earth should I suddenly undergo this transformation just to satisfy an external expectation? This is my life, and mine alone. Don't get me wrong, my parents don't have much sway over my actual decisions—I'll ultimately do whatever I want regardless of whether they disown me or not—but these constant expectations are profoundly disorienting...
Please don't take this the wrong way; I’m not trying to offend anyone. There are people who find genuine bliss in marriage and parenthood, who truly love that lifestyle, and more power to them. But I crave something more substantial than that; I refuse to live my life according to a cookie-cutter template. Find a job, work a standard 9-to-5, pick up the kids from school, prep breakfast and dinner, have intimacy with a spouse in the evening... and repeat that loop for thirty years? Then eventually get some grandkids, retire, and spend my mornings picking out produce at the local supermarket... Is that it? Is that the entirety of a human existence? 😲
Tell me, am I losing my mind for wanting something more (even if I can't quite articulate what that "something" is)? I feel a profound sense of pity for myself when I realize that at only 23, I already feel this utterly miserable... if this is how it feels now, what does the future hold? I've become disillusioned with people, too; I only have one true friend left (though even with her, I don't feel I can truly open up), and I simply lack the energy to invest in building relationships with anyone else. I find I only truly connect with animals; at least they are honest and instinctual. Perhaps I should just pop a few antidepressants. Then I could just fake a smile, wear a mask, retreat into my own little shell, and pretend to be fulfilled and happy just like everyone else. 🤷
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