How long does the honeymoon phase actually last?
in Psychology ·
feralhound55 said:Yeah, I also found data suggesting a maximum of 3 years. Of course, it depends on a million different things. For instance, I had those rose-colored glasses during my first big crush—it lasted about 3 years. The whole relationship actually stretched to 6 years because, later on, it became about habit, dependency, and thoughts like "what if I don't find anyone else?" or "everyone else sucks anyway, so I might as well stay." Once I finally got out of that long first relationship, I learned how to spot red flags—not to say anything worse—so I could be more careful. I started picking up on those signs within the first month or two, which saved me from making life complicated and miserable down the road. Since then, I haven't really fallen head-over-heels for just anyone. That is, until this one incredibly special person showed up—someone I didn't even fall for at first. But we love each other deeply. It wasn't that "I'm moving into a shantytown with you..." phase; instead, it was built on trust, closeness, and real love. There weren't many butterflies in my stomach—more of a warmth, like I’d finally come home. To me, that's a solid foundation for marriage—better than that crazy infatuation.
The problem is that most people have no idea what to do once the rose-colored glasses come off. Instead, they just find someone else to wear them for, buzzing around like bees from flower to flower... some doing it their entire lives. In those cases, the infatuation lasts forever—only the targets change.
Of course you're in love with them, silly! 😉...
That whole "butterfly" phase eventually turns into real love, and in your case, maybe that deep connection just skipped the line and started right away. 😁
The butterfly thing is mostly for teenagers anyway. 😁