Posts by brisktiger56

Jeffrey Kelly said:Good grief, I have no intention of wading through that entire PDF. I'll just say this: the mere sight of the thread title left me absolutely speechless...

...do parents actually wonder what their kids are thinking? Or does the kid even bother to ask what "required reading" is supposed to be for anyway? It wouldn't surprise me if at least half of these kids don't see any point in wading through some massive tome.

rowdypanther12 said:Oh, I don't think it's quite that simple. It isn't strictly the fault of teachers or parents, though there is certainly a group of people who grew to hate books because of school assignments—even if they usually end up finding a book they love later on.
I've always been a total bookworm. I'd say I owe it to my mom, who read to me constantly growing up. But my sister hasn't read three books in her entire life, despite my mom trying just as hard with her. She just wasn't interested. My partner is the same way; he just doesn't care for books or reading.
Since I think he's a smart guy 😍 and, as a lifelong lover of the written word, I struggle to understand how someone can dislike books, I tried to "convert" him. It didn't work. 😁
To him, books are just ink on paper. He reads the words, but he doesn't truly see them.
Even when a story is interesting, it's just letters on a page rather than a magical new world waiting behind the cover.
That isn't something you can force; maybe you can spark it in childhood, but not if you're just handing out random books instead of ones tailored to the person. 😁
I suppose it's just one of those things you either have or you don't.

Personally, I always found reading pretty dull; the only thing that ever kept me awake was Kafka.🙂

I honestly think it's just one of those things—you either have it or you don't.

It feels to me like that "missing piece" might be because it wasn't nurtured or sparked early on—specifically that sense of imagination required to turn raw sentences into that "magical new world" people talk about when they open a cover...

The whole trick with reading is how it builds entirely new worlds and relationships inside your own head—it kicks the emotional engine into gear, stirs the conscience, or forces you to question yourself. A book is arguably more valuable than a movie because it doesn't let us sit there as passive observers. To actually digest a story, we HAVE to build everything ourselves in our minds—visualizing every presence and absence—and I suppose that process makes us a bit more spiritually enriched.

wanderinggardener12 said:Good grief. Looking back through some of these threads, I’m struck by just how much heavy lifting is actually required here—and I don't mean the writing itself, but the fundamental cultivation of a reading habit.

But we aren't talking about the way things are currently handled in our schools.

Every one of us is a unique individual from the moment we're born, yet isn't it true that there exists a core collection of perhaps a hundred books that almost anyone would find captivating if they had the chance during their formative years? If those books were actually selected specifically for the person being recommended, wouldn't it be nearly impossible not to catch the reading bug? And if you pair that right choice with an environment that actually encourages exploration, aren't we all just a few steps closer to meaningful communication on every possible level?

It honestly pains me to think that some of you missed out on the sheer joy and intellectual nourishment that comes from a good book. You can look directly at your parents or your teachers for that; go ahead, hold them accountable for the deprivation they caused. It’s fundamentally the same as someone trying to strip the pleasure out of intimacy or the satisfaction of a great meal by forcing you into a hollow encounter with someone you find repulsive, or making you choke down something you consider absolute garbage, all while demanding that you sit there and provide a detailed, clinical description of the experience...

I mostly agree with that...
...but then again, I also feel like when we're putting together a reading list, it might be good to toss in something that actually makes us a little uncomfortable—just to stir the pot a bit and spark some real debate or thought. A healthy mix of "reading for fun" and "reading to challenge your worldview" seems like the move.

rustyjackal10 said:Oh, absolutely, they would have to. Honestly, that’s what makes a great teacher, and frankly, we need way more people like that in our school systems (though let’s be real, the shortage of actually competent teachers is a whole other headache entirely). Right now, the whole "What did the author mean?" thing usually just boils down to the student giving the answer the teacher WANTS to hear.
Like, imagine an author writes that their curtains were a strikingly bright blue. The teacher asks little Perica what the author was trying to say. They’re expecting some deep, philosophical epiphany, but little Perica just concludes that the sentence was meant to highlight the fact that the curtains were, well, really blue—which totally ticks the teacher off.

But in reality, one person might see a longing for the sky and freedom from sorrow, someone else might see a yearning for love, and little Perica is just pointing out that the curtains WERE indeed blue. We shouldn't be looking for a single "correct" answer or forcing kids to memorize plot points and literary critiques by rote. We should be encouraging free thought—where students talk it out among themselves until they realize the point is that the author’s intent eventually meets whatever the reader concludes.


"Wouldn't it stop being about just checking boxes and start being about recognizing how someone personally connects with a text—using language to back up an opinion, almost like presenting a thesis from a book?"

That’s exactly it.

"Some books are to be tasted, others to be swallowed, and some few to be chewed and digested"
- Francis Bacon book

You’re supposed to experience a book, chew on it, form your own take, and then defend it—that’s basically the whole reason we even assign reading in the first place.

I don't recall ever being taught to approach literature that way back in my American school days...

isn't that just awful?
🙄

rustyjackal10 said:I am absolutely suggesting that. At the end of the day, all that knowledge is pretty much useless unless it's paired with building actual character and teaching people how to think for themselves.

If we actually did this, teachers would HAVE to respect different takes on the same book. Instead of everyone just nodding along, what an author intended could actually spark some decent, productive debates in the classroom!

It wouldn't be about just checking boxes anymore—it would be about recognizing when a student is actually putting themselves out there, using language to defend a stance or an opinion, almost like they're presenting a thesis based on what they read.

rustyjackal10 said:Look, assigned reading is a great tool, but you can't grade it based on a system like—"Hey, show me your notebook, your handwriting looks neat, here’s an A." That's not it. In my experience, reading assignments were always graded through actual discussion or testing; we weren't just quizzed on tiny details from the plot, but rather on the big themes, the metaphors, the moral lessons, and basically, "what was the author trying to say?" To me, there really needs to be room for two specific things when it comes to grading:

1. The author meant what I heard—everyone experiences a book differently. Some people connect with a story one way, others totally differently, and I think every teacher needs to leave space for that personal connection, provided the student can actually back up their take with a solid explanation.

2. "This book is boring and I hate it"—man, I cannot tell you how many times I've seen students get tanked on their grades just for feeling that way... I personally got into a massive, heated debate with my professor once over Mark Twain. Some books are just plain dull for certain people, but honestly, if they can explain *why* it's boring, they should be fine. It proves they actually engaged with the material, understood the author's style, recognized where things went overboard, or identified which of the author's viewpoints they just couldn't get behind.

That all kind of assumes the kid already has a developed worldview, doesn't it? I mean, how can you decide something is brilliant or tedious if you don't have your own "self" to compare it against? It feels to me like the school system just uses reading lists to cram info into kids, almost like they're just giving them the gears to start thinking with...

Are you suggesting we should encourage students to develop their own personalities regardless of the reading list—basically, independent of the specific ideas the books are pushing?

Daniel Gomez10 said:That's a tough one...
I think it's just like anything else—kids naturally gravitate toward certain things, including reading. You’ve got some kids who absolutely live for a good book, and then you have others who just aren't really into it at all.
Maybe we could try leading that second group by example? I've found that picking out some shorter, punchier books that actually grab their attention helps get them hooked. Then again, I know from experience there are just some kids who won't be swayed by anything, no matter how you approach it.
Look, reading the assigned books is mandatory, plain and simple. It’s just like finishing a math worksheet—it's part of the job when you're in school. There's really no point in doing the homework or the reading for them, though. It's their responsibility to get it done, whether they're feeling it or not.

to me, it feels like kids would actually dive into books to find answers to everything under the sun IF there wasn't this sense of forced compliance—assuming, of course, that the books actually contain interesting insights that can blow their minds or help them grow...

Obligations and homework make sense on paper, but let's be real—who actually enjoys them??
What percentage of kids actually tackle a task, or a required reading list, with genuine enthusiasm?
Where's the disconnect? Is it the pressure?

rustyjackal10 said:Look, I honestly don't think it's fair to judge a kid based on a drawing or anything like that. I spent all eight years of middle school struggling with those art assignments—just trying to sketch this or that—and I was terrible at it. For some reason, the "age-appropriate content" they push in the lower grades doesn't actually match what kids should be doing.

They shouldn't fail them. Our entire education system is broken from the top down, but if you're forced to deal with it as it stands—well, all those grades eventually lead somewhere, and I don't think we should be blocking a kid from getting into a specific high school just because of a lack of raw talent. You aren't going to find fairness in grading by changing the grading scale itself; you get it by changing the people enforcing it and how they go about it. Everyone here seems obsessed with wanting to change the kids and their attitudes, yet nobody stops to ask what kind of environment they're being raised in or if the whole method is even sound to begin with.

Effort counts for something, I guess. Being dedicated is pretty vital when it comes to making progress in school, but you can't really have a fair assessment of knowledge when the actual delivery of that information is, in most cases, pretty much useless. Again—fix the system first.

But then how do you handle grading literature? I mean, how do you even grade that fairly when most kids just pull a summary off the internet?😛

nimblelynx7 said:Exactly. Reading the assigned books wasn't the issue; the problem was the sheer volume of writing required. Back in high school, we had this one teacher—thank God she retired after just one year—who demanded at least 15 pages per book. If you didn't hit that mark, you got an F, regardless of whether you actually read it or not. It was ridiculous. All it did was force everyone, both the readers and the slackers, to just scavenge stuff off the internet.

For her, sheer volume mattered way more than actual quality ☕
poor lady...

but honestly, what makes it worse is that she isn't the only one using totally broken metrics and a flawed approach to teaching.

Daniel Gomez10 said:It's about learning how to read and truly understand things—developing critical thinking, analysis, and synthesis skills. It helps with mastering our own language and others, too. But honestly, the best part is letting your imagination run wild and getting lost in different eras and worlds.
Plus, you pick up bits of human history along the way, depending on the book.

If you're wondering why certain titles are picked as "required" instead of just letting kids choose whatever they want, it's because those books are considered landmarks in literary history. That alone makes them worth studying in an English class.
Another huge reason is that, let's be real, most kids probably wouldn't pick up a book at all if it wasn't assigned. 😬
Sadly, even with assignments, a lot of kids still skip the actual reading and just hunt down summaries online.

edit: To answer the main question here, I don't do my kids' homework or required reading for them. I want them to learn how to be independent and responsible. I'll help if they ask, but I won't do the work for them. And that goes for more than just books.

Back when I was forced to read these things, I didn't see the point. It was all just boring 😛 and writing those little essays was even worse. I couldn't find any sense in living through someone else's imagination or reliving historical events...

Now, looking back, it seems like stuff worth paying attention to, but I have no clue how anyone could have gotten me interested as a kid. Since I wasn't interested and it was mandatory, everyone else was just reading and writing purely so they wouldn't fail their American literature grade.

So, how do you actually spark that desire in a child to read, explore, or talk about what they've read with others? I suppose if we actually had the answer to that, there wouldn't even be a need for required reading... right?

moved from the thread "Do you help your kids with homework and reading assignments—and why?"
tihonsee

Alright, let's just step back for a second—what is the actual point of assigned reading anyway?
What's the grand design behind it all?

It was shut down because someone with the power to kill threads unilaterally—without checking if the majority actually agrees—decided it was time. Whether that’s democratic or not is pretty obvious, but honestly, if the topic didn't fit the "Philosophy 101" section, they could have just moved it elsewhere instead of nuking it...

I guess this format works better, though it’s pretty clear the person in charge is finally feeling alive—or maybe just finally feels like they have some semblance of control over something in their life: deciding whether a thread gets 👎 or 👍 (life or death, metaphorically speaking). It’s a good thing they aren't deciding anyone's actual life or death...

p.s. There’s really no point in arguing with the mods about this. So far, they haven't exactly shown an ability to understand the users in most of those closed threads—you know, the ones that don't offend anyone and are totally harmless... Meanwhile, there are a million other threads that are incredibly offensive but stay wide open... Conclusion: the mods are anything but perfect or objective.

You just call up someone who’s already working as a consultant and ask them what their rates are. It’s pretty straightforward—and honestly, it's a way to keep things fair for everyone in the industry by keeping prices stable.

I actually went through something similar when I was second-guessing what to charge for a shoot. So, I called up a local photography studio and played it cool—telling them I was looking for a photographer to handle "this and that"—and they told me exactly what their fee was. And boom, there's my benchmark.

I pitched that same number to the client, and yeah, I landed the gig.

Are you talking about the rate of change of volatility here?

Sam Hayes said:Not at all—actually, I’m at the beach every single day right now, just soaking it all in 🙂 and honestly, I've been feeling so much better lately; I think I might finally be reaching a point where I truly believe real change is possible 🙂

Oh, come on, don't be silly! You've already changed—you're just sitting there overthinking how you *might* change next... ah, get real!

If you thought you were just waking up as the exact same person every morning, well, you're mistaken. We're all shifting just a tiny fraction every single day—it’s just a matter of... which direction we're heading.

Enjoy being young while it lasts!!!

So, anyway, did you ever end up making it out to the carnival?

🙂

Sam Hayes said:Life is truly an art form...

I mean, honestly—for me, life itself is the masterpiece.

Kevin Bailey2 said:Has anyone actually found a cure for changing your perspective? 🤣

Look. What can I even tell you.
It’s basically an act of will.

In the end, everything boils down to "practice."
Order, hard work, and discipline.

Everything else is just an illusion... let's call it that.

Nothing happens without effort... in this case, "working on yourself."
Working on order.
Putting things where they belong.

The problem is you have to force your thoughts toward the positive.

How do you think you get overwhelmed by negative thoughts?
That was also a process... a long, drawn-out process... that a person just gives in to.
Because it's easy.
Going downhill? Oh, there's nothing easier.
Just tumbling like a ball... 🤣 and rolling straight down.
Great!!! 🤣

That's just a pile of trash that builds up inside a person.

First, you have to purge it all out, then start building from the ground up.
Because how are you going to build on top of trash?
No chance.

I'm sorry I have to be blunt with you... but you have to fight.
That's the whole philosophy.
The struggle.
And it's hard... and that answer doesn't sit well with everyone.
It's easier to just pop some Zoloft, Xanax, or Prozac... 😍

But what does that get you? Eventually, you aren't even aware of your own personality... so what did you actually achieve?

What do you really have if you don't have yourself?

Today you look up at the sky and think it looks gloomy.
You tell yourself: "Gloomy sky. It's going to rain. Wonderful. Perfect! It's all part of nature. Man, I love life."

Besides, you mentioned you don't want to wake up at 50 and realize you wasted your entire self.

Isn't that enough motivation for you?

You won't be here forever.
This life might be the only one you get.
Learn to appreciate it.
It's short. You wouldn't believe how short.

Maybe you should start... not tomorrow... but... hm... right now? Right this second?

Well written, but...

Some people are always going to find it hard to accept that THEY are the ones who have to move themselves, because nobody else is going to do it for them. Also, I worry about how much self-pity plays a role in sinking deeper... and to change that, you really do need to shift your perception.

Maybe people like that should be faced with a truly serious problem, like... a shortage, hunger, or thirst... and once they’ve spent months struggling through the desert only to have clean water finally flow (which they’d now have constantly), maybe their perspective would shift toward gratitude, and with that, toward greater
life satisfaction.

What do you guys think?

Sam Hayes said:It’s funny how things change as you get older—I honestly can’t tell if I should take that as a compliment or a bit of a critique 🤣
I mean, I know I’m still relatively young, but there’s no running away from who you are... not that I haven't tried, but I think I finally realize I don't want to run anymore...
And it’s largely because of my ego—I’m becoming very aware of how much it holds me back in so many areas of my life... which is exactly why I’m looking for a change, I suppose. I really don't want to hit 50 and find myself wondering how I even managed to live my life when I was younger... I don't regret anything I've done or haven't done in the past, truly, but sometimes I just get this wave of anxiety thinking about how much better life might actually be if I were just... more relaxed. It’s not like I’m aiming for some impossible, cinematic life where I’m constantly chasing mountains and valleys or trying to check off a billion once-in-a-lifetime experiences—that's not really me. I just want to learn how to unwind and actually enjoy the moment, to give my absolute best toward my goals without being so weighed down by my own ego...

For me, acting a little crazy or hitting up an amusement park always does the trick. It helps me forget all that stuff that's weighing you down. Have you even been to a carnival lately? Just a thought...

Sam Hayes said:Of course, I'm 22 years old 🙂—did you honestly think I was a minor? 😕

I was pretty much convinced you were pushing fifty—honestly, I had it all mapped out—but I can finally breathe a little easier now that I realize your situation is actually totally normal for someone your age. It’s a relief, really. And since you've already figured out how to get everything back on track yourself, I’m feeling pretty chill about it... I have a feeling things are going to click into place for you sooner rather than later.

P.S.—since you’re still pretty young, do you have any real sense of how much the demographic landscape—you know, the actual adult population—is going to shift by the time you reach my age? 😉You really have to step back and look at things from their perspective—with that specific lens they’re using—to actually realize how much you've got going for you. It kind of puts things in focus, seeing where you're standing right now and just how many doors are actually open to you. Honestly, it makes you appreciate your own position a whole lot more.

Alright, here’s a little something for everyone:

Isn't the whole foundation for shifting how we see things just being open to new ideas—basically, checking that ego at the door and moving past this constant, nagging feeling that we’re the only ones who actually have it right while everyone else is just fundamentally wrong?