3 posts shown.
goldenskipper13 said:..if we just listened to their doctors, we wouldn't react to anything... the whole point is that through this thread, we learn from each other's experiences so we can actually be prepared when talking to physicians..and so on
If it weren't for this forum and the wonderful women here who were so willing to share their stories and journeys, who knows when I would have finally walked away from the OBGYN that kept feeding me the wrong medications and the wrong diagnoses. I learned so much from their experiences. It helped me realize exactly which direction I needed to take. Like I said before, thank you all so much for that.🙂
And thanks to the admins for the way things were handled back then, because we didn't have these kinds of moderators. If things stay like this, any new women joining us won't find any actual value in this community. 👎
goldenskipper13 said:then that beta test is like winning the lottery.
If I were to post a positive beta now—after all the struggle, the despair, and the tears—knowing there are women here who would honestly cry tears of joy right along with me, and then someone deleted my post and told me it was "unimportant," I would take that as a personal insult. It would feel like a mockery of everything my husband, our families, and I have endured just to reach that positive result. Please, let's not make light of anyone else's hardship.
Look, we get it. There's an effort to bring some order to RiD, and that makes sense. But please, don't treat us like we're just some wannabe group; we've all been through this. Personally, about a year ago, I spent an entire afternoon in tears after coming to the WB forum to write about what lay ahead, only to be met with a flood of responses telling me to "just relax, the baby will come." Some women on the WB forum try to step up and help, and thank God most succeed in staying out of MPO waters. They can't understand our discussions regarding the medications we take or the struggles we face at hospitals and in our communities, and we don't expect them to. However, I cannot fathom how anyone could say "just relax" when tears are so common for any woman who has been battling infertility for years.
Infertility isn't the same thing as WB. Infertility hurts. It hurts deeply. There are specific diagnoses and treatments for infertility. Is it really too much to ask for those of us who are becoming more numerous to have a dedicated MPO chat? On RiD, our posts could be a massive lifeline for many people who just stop by or follow us regularly without posting themselves. They won't find that on the off section. They won't read our stories, which would undoubtedly help others. I know those posts were a huge help to me; if it weren't for them, I likely wouldn't even know where to turn or who to talk to today.
I am grateful to all my fellow sisters 🙂 for where I am now. I'm thankful for everything they wrote and for the fact that, through their posts, I found the doctor who is managing my care today—the one I know will eventually give me that positive beta result.
To the moderators, I simply ask for a little understanding. We feel marginalized in so many ways; please don't add to that. 🙂
It’s exactly one week until my 30th birthday. For the longest time, I had this clear goal of having two children by the time I hit 30... and I haven't made it happen.
It’s also one week before my vacation starts. While everyone around me is buzzing about trips to the beach or buying new swimsuits, when they ask where I'm heading, I just tell them I don't know yet. How am I supposed to explain that the thing I'm actually most looking forward to is a quiet retreat at a spiritual center?
And now, it's the day before my fourth IVF cycle begins. Who knows if this will be the last one...
Between the heavy PMS—which is just a constant reminder that my hormones are running wild again—it's hard to hold back the tears. I find myself thinking about how there is this one corner, this tiny thread on a single forum, filled with people who actually understand me and get exactly what I'm going through. I can't wait to get home, open my laptop, and connect with those people... but as of today, doing so is against the forum rules. 😲
God, how is this possible? How can posts be considered "unimportant" when a woman is in tears, standing on the edge, sharing how a strange ache in her abdomen seven days after an embryo transfer—an ache I'm feeling right now and hoping is a good sign—turned out to be nothing because the blood test was negative again? Or how can it be "irrelevant" when a woman with the exact same diagnosis as mine shares her positive result after the procedure? My God, these aren't unimportant; a post from six months ago can mean everything to me, restoring my faith and hope right when I feel at my lowest. Just like today.
So, to our moderators: I sincerely hope you and your loved ones never have to learn how much infertility hurts. But I am asking you, from the bottom of my heart, please do not strip away our mutual support. We are fighting the hardest battles of our lives right here, right now. While others are going on summer vacations, celebrating birthdays, and enjoying the season... we aren't. We are fighting like warriors, and all we ask of you is to let us keep fighting. Without support and understanding, it's almost impossible.
And if we—the forum members, the very reason this site exists—really are unimportant to you; if you think people only stop by for a specific piece of data... well, I'm constantly Googling my diagnoses and reading through ancient threads on other forums. I follow stories from, say, 2007, tracing someone's journey through their treatment, the encouragement they received, and finally, that positive test result that restores my optimism. Yes, it all happened years ago, but it means so much to me right now. Not a single piece of information I find is irrelevant. The fact remains that on MPO, discussions have always centered on things related to MPO. Isn't that the whole point of this topic?
Please, have some understanding. To us, this topic is more important than anything else on this forum.