Posts by Carol Barrett2

It’s really just about eating less—volume-wise, you know? Just cut back. Especially when it comes to bread. If someone is actually feeling hungry, they should grab some fruit instead—maybe even just half a piece, like a banana or something. Honestly, it’s hard to give a "smart" answer here because everyone's body works differently; you can't just hand out the same advice and expect it to work for everyone.

cosmiclynx79 said:I don't get how antidepressants are supposed to cause weight gain. The logic goes that they increase appetite, right? But here's the thing: I eat normally, I don't binge, I actually track my calories, and yet, I'm still gaining weight. It makes zero sense.

Me? I manage to keep my weight steady. Mostly by just... skipping dinner and handing it over to the enemy. 😁 Or I'll just have something tiny for dinner. Like last night—just a bit of cheese and a banana. Breakfast is where I really struggle, though. My mom knows how to cook a killer meal, and she'll whip up something great for breakfast, but it feels like a total crime if I don't load up on bread. 🕺

I don't even eat much bread at lunch.

Jurica222 said:Is there any mental health stuff going on here?

Just out here chasing a personal best—three whole years without a hospital stay. @Harold Anderson3, I'm right there with you.

I don't really have much of a sweet tooth, honestly—but I definitely go a bit overboard with the sugar when I'm making my coffee. 🕺

fadedhound86 said:I’ve been dealing with these absolutely brutal mood swings lately... I honestly have no idea what’s causing them, but it’s like I’m flipping between being totally miserable and feeling great five different times in just two days... (and then it flips right back again)

Between bipolar and depression, we might as well just throw schizophrenia into the mix while we're at it. You should talk to your doctor about getting something specifically for that. I had a long talk with my psychiatrist ages ago—she agreed with me and actually added something extra to my prescription just to handle those mood shifts.

I'm doing okay now, thank God—been stable for over two years. I still have some occasional setbacks, nothing major, but nothing where I completely lose my grip or have an episode. Though, to be fair, there were a few close calls where it almost went south.

The worst part is when money gets tight—when you're struggling financially and can't even afford the basics. That's when the anxiety really starts to claw at me.

I've been diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia, though personally, I don't feel like that's quite right. It’s more like I get totally disoriented in space. When I go to a mall or somewhere with my family and I lose sight of them for even a second, I just lose all sense of direction and panic.

I can't even find the exit or anything. My mom actually told me recently that I absolutely have to carry my phone on me at all times because of this.

But I don't carry anything. No ID, no phone, no cash—nothing. It's like that every time I head out with my folks. I can't even move around without someone keeping an eye on me, period.

It's almost like I'm on the spectrum or something. 👎

fadedhound86 said:That line you dropped really gave me something to chew on. I guess I’ve spent so much time stuck in my own head, feeling sorry for myself, that I didn't even realize how much my hospital stays, my outbursts, and those dark moments where I'd threaten to end it all actually took a toll on the people closest to me...

Man, this mental health stuff is just brutal... Even when you think you're finally in remission, it still haunts you...

Sent from my iPhone using Reddit

I know I've caused damage—mostly just to my own people. But that's just how this disease works, what can you do? It’s been a huge financial drain on them, too. I mean, they were constantly footing the bill for gas and travel just to come visit me at the hospital and stuff like that.

It's hard to call that "healthy." Unfortunately, I'm not even in remission right now. I'm more like in a plateau stage with the illness. I'll probably have another episode eventually, since I seem to end up hospitalized every couple of years or so.

It's been over two years since my last major episode, though. 🙂

This goes back to 2013—specifically in March, right around when Hugo Chavez passed away.

So, I basically stumbled right into the path of a car, and it hit me—but honestly, I didn't even feel the impact at first. I just kept walking, maybe for a mile or so, before I suddenly realized there was blood dripping from my chin and my leg was absolutely killing me. An ambulance finally showed up to pick me up and rushed me to the hospital, where they ran some scans and took a urine sample... and then, without even stitching me up or treating my wounds, they just dumped me straight into the psych ward.

For an entire month, I was stuck in psych with these open wounds, just slathering aloe vera ointment on them while trying to deal with the swelling and pain in my leg. To top it all off, they found morphine in my urine, claiming it was because of the codeine I’d taken. I'd popped some codeine right before the accident just to manage the pain I was already dealing with.

Apparently, my body can't process codeine properly—it just converts it straight into morphine. Some kind of metabolic demon is messing with my system. As for why I ended up lunging in front of a car? I have no clue. All I know is that I wasn't trying to end it all.

I was also going through this intense spiritual phase—not strictly religious, just... intense. And considering I'm nearly 6'7", weighing only about 143 pounds back then was definitely not helping.

crimsonviper48 said:Is anyone even active on here anymore? I’m curious about something... what I see when I close my eyes... because the first unnatural thing I saw while my eyes were wide open was death. I was only six years old back then... and I used to have these night terrors, but God would always give me this guidance... I listened to Him, and honestly, things just worked out better for me in life... once, I actually slipped on some soap in the bathroom and it was almost over—I was falling straight onto my back—but then this invisible force just caught me and set me right again. I just said, "Thank you, God." It happened when I was only six... anyway, getting back to the point, does anyone else see things behind their eyelids at night? Like visions of martyrs in hell or demons and stuff... has anyone else experienced this? To me, it doesn't even feel like schizophrenia, it just feels... strange. These antipsychotics sort of numb me out, they make me feel dead inside, specifically Qpin... but if I just take Modafinil and Prazin, it’s like I haven't taken anything at all.

I had an allergy to Q pin, and Seroquel almost caused my kidneys to fail. Now I'm on Modafinil and Prazin, plus Luminol and Xanax. I can't remember the other name for Luminol—Abilify, if I recall correctly.

That sounds like schizophrenia to me, man. But maybe a milder version? Everyone's different. Personally, when I'm having a psychotic episode, I lose my train of thought, start talking nonsense, and just act totally manic.

crimsonviper48 said:Honestly, you guys... I’m just sitting here reading this forum today and man, I thought I was the one dealing with schizophrenia, but you all have truly mastered what the professionals call "word salad"... I am genuinely lost tonight. My eyes were jumping from the second line to the third trying to make sense of anything, but nothing connects... anyway, how are you all doing? As for me, I'm somewhere in the middle. I stay on my meds, though the psychosis still creeps back in sometimes. It’s not really voices for me, though... I think I heard actual voices maybe four times in the last three years. For me, it's more like when I close my eyes to sleep, things start happening... like driving through a desert, or little people dancing around a campfire, or flaming skulls and demons... it’s terrifying. And then there's the paranoia, mostly when I'm riding the subway or the bus. My first psychotic break was surreal... I was busy working, judging people, when suddenly, out of nowhere, it felt like the Virgin Mary appeared and told me, "Don't worry, dear child, the world will end in 2035." The second time was this strange light that kept shifting colors, like a weird sun reflection... it was so disorienting. The floorboards even started warping and bending... nothing too crazy at the time, I guess. I didn't even realize I was losing it; I just figured, okay, I saw what I saw, let's move on. But when the panic attacks started hitting, I couldn't handle it anymore. That was probably the first time I actually saw a psychiatrist... or maybe my GP sent me after a hallucination, I can't quite remember. I just remember being on an IV drip that felt so incredible, like I had stepped straight into heaven... who knows what they gave me. I spent six stints at the local psychiatric hospital and, well, that's my story. Alongside the schizo, I've got borderline too.

Six or seven hospitalizations, acting out, no hallucinations, but plenty of delusions. Officially, I've had it for 12 years, but unofficially? Probably since I was a kid.

Sandra Lee2 said:Ever tried caffeine? There are tablets for it; I use them myself.

I drink plenty of coffee, but if this narcolepsy thing is real, caffeine doesn't even touch it. Honestly, though, I think the diazepam is messing with my sleep too much. Someone else on here mentioned a while back that it might be wrecking my REM cycle, which would explain why I'm constantly exhausted.

With narcolepsy, you get those days where insomnia kicks in or you just can't get enough sleep—assuming, of course, that's actually what I'm dealing with.

Anyway, the healthcare system over here is a total disaster.

Matthew Castillo5 said:Carol Barrett2, I think you might be dealing with a different set of laws and regulations since you're in a different state.

It’s not identical, but there are definitely similarities. Most of the laws they pass over here are just carbon copies of what you guys do or what the European Union dictates. Personally, I got hit with some paperwork mess-ups myself; now we have to resubmit everything this April because one group of bureaucrats is treating me like a Category I disability case with limited capacity, while another group thinks I'm a Category II case—which covers maybe 90% of the situation.

Everything went sideways during that whole Corona mess, so my folks didn't really bother complaining about the chaos. I actually have rights regarding benefits from Canada, but those Canadians are being difficult—they're asking for something extra, but we can't figure out exactly what it is, and getting in touch with them isn't exactly easy.

We tried reaching out, but honestly? It was a total waste of time.

Sandra Lee2 said:Thanks

Honestly, you’ve got nothing to lose. My plan? I just landed a win here, so now I'm thinking about reapplying this coming April to bump up to Category I status. They tagged me as Category II almost two years ago, but the second medical board—and the doctor on it, specifically—told me I actually qualify for Category I, which would stop them from docking my disability benefits.

Anyway, moving on to a different tangent—I decided to tweak my meds without asking anyone first. I was taking one pill, half a tablet twice a day. Now, I’m just taking one full tablet once a day. The original deal was supposed to be half a pill twice a day or maybe one or two whole ones depending on how I felt.

I also cut back on the Diazepam—down from 5 mg to just a half pill. Some days I’ll take the whole thing, other days just a half, kind of playing it by ear.

I’ll probably sleep less, though I'm still sleeping quite a bit.

Sandra Lee2 said:Don't mention it. You have to fight; life is a struggle. I'm fighting too—I managed seven months without antipsychotics, but I couldn't push past that.

Besides, the famous John Nash dealt with schizophrenia and didn't take meds for a good portion of his life after leaving the hospital.

Nash did not take any medication after 1970, nor was he committed to a hospital ever again.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_F...Mental illness

+1 Mental illness

Sandra Lee2 said:Maybe try getting a second opinion from another doctor. From my experience, schizophrenia itself doesn't necessarily cause drowsiness, but antipsychotics certainly do. Some hit harder than others; for me, they hit quite hard.

Perhaps you could lower the dosage, or better yet, ask a different physician—not your current one—to switch you to a different prescription.

With this whole COVID-19 mess, getting an actual face-to-face with a doctor is basically impossible around here. I haven't seen mine in person for nearly two years. It’s all just electronic prescriptions at this point. And as for my current psychiatrist? I can't exactly just swap them out—they're assigned through the local county clinic, via the CDC system.

I get it, I know the Associated Press reports that these drugs cause drowsiness, and yeah, I need to stay awake, but the problem is I'm oversleeping even without them—or with just a tiny bit. Even before I was on this stuff, back when I was just a kid, I used to sleep like a log.

Thanks, man. I might try reaching out to some other doc privately.

Sandra Lee2 said:Perhaps consult a physician about Pfizer? It’s prescribed for narcolepsy.

Well, he’s convinced it’s all just schizophrenia and the meds—that’s his diagnosis, anyway. He claims it’s totally abnormal to be sleeping 10+ hours multiple times a day. Most days it's 10 to 14 hours, sometimes even 16 to 20. No matter how much medication he's on, it's never "normal." And honestly, I was oversleeping way before the therapy started—back before the actual illness kicked in. Though, who knows, maybe I had schizophrenia back then too and nobody just realized it yet.

I've been an excessive sleeper since elementary and middle school. Even back in class, I'd drift off occasionally. My parents basically had to drag me out of bed whenever they wanted to go somewhere. They'd call for me, I'd stumble home from school and pass out immediately, and my mom would just have to yell down from the balcony that I was already asleep.

Take last night, for example: I slept from 7:30 PM to 9:30 PM, stayed awake until 12:30 AM, and then slept another 8 hours straight until this morning. Now, I’m probably heading right back to sleep, likely for another 14, 15, or maybe even 16 hours.😵

Sandra Lee2 said:Does anyone have any insight regarding disability benefits and schizophrenia?

I’ve sort of managed to figure out a similar situation for myself—partially, anyway. I’m basically living on minimum wage right now, but considering I was making absolutely nothing before this, it’s a step up. Still... whether that's actually enough to survive on once I'm on my own? Honestly, who knows.

Sandra Lee2 said:Hello.
How are you all managing the drowsiness caused by antipsychotics?

I’ve been relying on caffeine pills and quite a bit of coffee. But I’d really prefer something more effective.

It's rough, especially since I might actually have narcolepsy. Between the meds and just sleeping way too much for years before I even started them, I'm basically a professional sleeper at this point.

Sandra Lee2 said:A healthy mind requires a healthy body. Proper nutrition matters, and it might just help.

True enough, but let’s be real—we’re all basically just dosing ourselves with measured poisons. Every medication has its trade-offs and side effects, after all. Personally, I sleep way too much anyway—I sometimes joke that I might have narcolepsy—but the meds definitely make the drowsiness even worse.

I’m honestly a little worried about developing Parkinson's as I get older because my hands shake a bit and I get those occasional spasms... plus, some of the stuff I'm on can actually trigger Parkinson's in certain patients as a side effect.

I’ve been on Diazepam for nearly 12 years now, Fluphenazine for about 11, along with a few other things. I actually ended up in the psych ward once because of a Fluphenazine overdose—they gave me way too much during my treatment.

There was also one time where a specific med almost caused my kidneys to fail.

mellowwalker59 said:Honestly, just hearing a diagnosis of schizophrenia can be terrifying... It’s more than just a medical condition, though—it feels like a sentence. When people want to hurt someone, they wish a schizophrenia diagnosis on them. Someone carrying that label often faces a harder life than someone behind bars. But look, schizophrenia isn't an absence of emotion, or some kind of "evil" state, or a void where nothing exists. It usually shows up as a reaction—kind of a trigger response to the world around us. It tends to surface after trauma, injustice, or abuse. People living with this aren't stupid, and they aren't malicious or dangerous to others. If anything, they are most dangerous to themselves... They tend to withdraw because they feel unnecessary or misunderstood, and they're painfully aware of their diagnosis and how everyone else perceives them. People jump to conclusions about everything based on that label, but once you have it, you're stuck with it forever, even if the psychotic episodes don't happen again. These folks are suffering twice over. Is it truly their fault they ended up sick?
And if I could say one thing to anyone who's received this diagnosis: many of you didn't deserve to have that on your record. Just be certain that, eventually, it will be used against you. A friend tells a best friend, and suddenly the whole country knows. Anyway, thanks to the admin for at least looking out for us by banning those hateful comments and the stigma...

+1 Though, let’s be real—most of us lose our minds every now and then. I once wandered out into the street and got hit by a car; I didn't even realize I'd been struck until after the fact. I wasn't trying to kill myself or hurt anyone—it just happened.

Most of the time, I end up checking myself into the psych ward. I called the police on myself once, but my family canceled the call. Usually, I just start talking about things that have nothing to do with each other.

I just lose my way.

We often deal with physical issues alongside it, too. I have several, though unfortunately, none of it is officially documented anywhere. My liver test results went missing, and I have zero records for my joints or bones. Same thing with my vision—one eye is pretty bad, and I’ve got floaters and can see my own white blood cells.

Anyway, back to the topic—we finally sorted out some of my income. I have a bit of money coming in now, but we haven't cleared all the hurdles yet.