#1 ·
I just got flagged for "trolling" because I refused to lower my standards when it comes to the guys I date. Apparently, having expectations is an issue. The moderator took it personally—his ego couldn't handle someone speaking that way on his subforum. It was incredibly sexist, predatory, and honestly, just slimy... 👎 Just so you know who's actually moderating this Reddit thread...
Best Buy,
Reddit
The conversation started here:
Then he hit me with an infraction. On top of that, he flagged me just for bruising his ego, all while trying to play defense against my trolling...
And then, immediately in the very next post, they started badmouthing me, claiming I was being "aggressive."
Someone who feels so uncomfortable with a woman viewing her virginity as acceptable—and defending herself against criticism for it—is at best insecure, and at worst a predator trying to police "acceptable" behavior within a community. To him, any expectation that doesn't suit his agenda becomes "hate speech," or in this case, trolling. He’s subtly slandering me, using this supposed "trolling" to punish me, and twisting the narrative to make it seem like I'm upset because he rejected me... when my response made it perfectly clear that I'm simply stating my standards and refusing to let him twist them into some "rationalization."
Regardless of how you choose to deal with such a manipulative, insecure individual on your Reddit, one thing is obvious: my post wasn't trolling at all. The infraction needs to be removed.
Matthew Anderson said:Hey Sandra Chavez73...
You’ve been flagged for an infraction on Reddit.
Reason: Trolling...
-------
-------
This violation carries a 35-point penalty. You might find your access restricted until the term is up. Just a heads-up: serious offenses stay on your record forever...
Original Post:
I don't know why people act like this is some massive, groundbreaking revelation. It’s just common sense. You can't expect things to work perfectly when the system itself is built on shaky ground. People love to complain about the results, but they completely ignore the flawed process that got them there... Matthew Anderson is right about one thing, though. The sheer level of incompetence we see sometimes is staggering. It's not just a few bad actors; it feels systemic. Like everything else in this country lately... nothing seems to be functioning the way it was designed to...Quote: Matthew Anderson The user said:Here we go again with the rationalizing. Just because someone turned you down because you're inexperienced doesn't mean they're only looking for sex. It could just be that your lack of experience isn't a turn-on for them, and they don't want to waste their time while you're still trying to figure yourself out...
I don't know which girls you're trying to play with using this whole "rationalization" act, but they must have zero self-respect if they actually buy that those standards are just "rational..." 🙄 Like I said, if someone isn't "invested" in me—no matter how you define that or what kind of issues you think I represent—there's the door. That’s not me making excuses. It’s just... goodbye... 😛
Best Buy,
The conversation started here:
Yeah... The user said:This constant hate toward guys is getting old. The assumption that we’re all just clueless or don't know what we want simply because we haven't had sex yet is honestly pretty irritating...
Matthew Anderson said:There’s definitely some truth to that. The reality is simple: some people are going to prefer a kid or someone totally green. Others won't...
Yeah... said:I agree that I don't know everything about myself. I never claimed to. How much you can actually trust my word is anyone's guess. That’s really up to whoever ends up in a relationship with me... it depends on how much time we spend together, studying each other's reactions and psychology, and actually trying to understand one another.
If there's enough risk that I might be coming off as naive to cause an issue, then honestly, let that act as a good filter. There’s a risk involved with anyone... At the very least, people just change over time...
I consider myself a low risk—just a virgin with a dirty mind. If that’s enough to kill a potential relationship, then he wasn't actually interested anyway. Sorry, but I would never believe someone truly wanted me as much as I needed them if they suddenly decided I didn't "measure up" because of my lack of experience. That's just the excuse people use when they're lying about why they broke up...
If someone turns me down right out of the gate because I’m a virgin, then honestly, good riddance. I respect that decision... It just helps me filter out the people who are only looking for a quick hookup or don't have the patience to actually get to know me.
Matthew Anderson said:That’s just a rationalization you're feeding yourself. Personally, I have zero interest in virgins. I don't have the time in my late 30s to wait around for someone to find their footing, only for them to realize that half the things that turn me on aren't actually that hot to them... It’s a pattern, too. This is a massive misconception among guys who haven't had much experience—they assume that because they've built up this specific persona in their heads, reality will somehow follow suit. I've seen countless threads on Reddit where guys complain they wouldn't even know how to reject someone if they had to, acting like they'd master everything in bed instantly. Newsflash: If we're talking about actual kinks, that assumption is highly questionable...
Here we go again with the rationalization. Just because someone turned you down because you're inexperienced doesn't mean they’re only looking for a hookup. It could just be that your lack of experience isn't a turn-on for them, and they don't want to waste their time while you're still trying to figure yourself out...
Yeah... said:I don’t know which girls you’re trying to manipulate with this whole "rationalization" act, but they must have zero self-respect to swallow that excuse. Like I said before, if someone isn't actually interested in me—no matter how you spin your version of "interest" or what issues you claim I represent—then there's the door. That isn't being rational. It's just saying: Goodbye...
Then he hit me with an infraction. On top of that, he flagged me just for bruising his ego, all while trying to play defense against my trolling...
Matthew Anderson The user said:How exactly am I supposed to be manipulating you if I reject you based on your lack of experience? I’m deciding right from the jump that you aren't interesting to me...
And then, immediately in the very next post, they started badmouthing me, claiming I was being "aggressive."
Matthew Anderson said:According to her, it's manipulation just because some guy rejects her for being a virgin. This is exactly the kind of aggressive girl I'm talking about.
Someone who feels so uncomfortable with a woman viewing her virginity as acceptable—and defending herself against criticism for it—is at best insecure, and at worst a predator trying to police "acceptable" behavior within a community. To him, any expectation that doesn't suit his agenda becomes "hate speech," or in this case, trolling. He’s subtly slandering me, using this supposed "trolling" to punish me, and twisting the narrative to make it seem like I'm upset because he rejected me... when my response made it perfectly clear that I'm simply stating my standards and refusing to let him twist them into some "rationalization."
Regardless of how you choose to deal with such a manipulative, insecure individual on your Reddit, one thing is obvious: my post wasn't trolling at all. The infraction needs to be removed.