Can we finally call out Barbie for her modding?

I know I’m not exactly the most popular girl among the moderators over at Chicken (though I honestly don't get why—sure, I mess around sometimes, posting silly comments just to unwind and have some fun, which is what this forum is for if I understood correctly, but I try to be respectful and follow the rules)

Barbie is active in plenty of threads I enjoy reading. Even though I don't always agree with her takes (especially when she acts like the ultimate authority on everything and tears people down—in a pretty rude and inappropriate way, considering she should know how to communicate civilly without being condescent or making personal jabs at anyone who dares to have a different opinion)—I’ve never been disrespectful or insulting toward her. I have no interest in public drama; I know the rules, I don't want to get on the mods' bad side, and I genuinely try to play nice. Sometimes my opinion isn't everyone's cup of tea, but then again, their opinions aren't mine either. Sometimes we trade barbs, sometimes we debate the topic properly, sometimes we settle it in DMs, and sometimes we just ignore each other. Everyone wins.

After one misunderstanding (since people here tease and poke at each other constantly, maybe I gave myself too much leeway by poking fun at her, thinking we were all "cool" with each other—I really didn't mean anything by it, and I didn't realize I was in a group where that wasn't allowed because others had been teased for the exact same thing); plus, after a few previous DMs where it seemed like we'd agreed to disagree and move on (clearly, I was wrong); I realized it was smarter to just steer clear of her and not engage—better safe than sorry.

After a period of successfully avoiding and ignoring her, she started provoking me today in one of the threads without me even addressing her.

I tried to respond in a friendly tone (not that I want to be her friend, but I didn't want to seem like I was acting superior, so I left an honest, positive comment that I actually meant)

But she kept up the provocation and the personal digs—actually, straight-up insults. Which, frankly, were completely unnecessary.

(Please don't laugh at the silliness of the thread or the comments; the point isn't them, it's the interaction itself, which was totally unprovoked.)

I know things are moderated a certain way here, and I'm not looking for special treatment. But I am looking for some fairness. What is a regular user supposed to do when they can't even use the ignore button on someone because that person is a moderator? Someone who decides they can dump their opinions on everyone while refusing to accept any criticism, and feels entitled to insult others simply because they believe their view is the only correct one. I can't even report the insult because the other mods will probably just say I'm whining or complaining for no reason (I've seen that happen before).

I could just leave the forum, which would be a shame since I've been here for years. This place helps me relax, laugh, and learn new things. It doesn't feel right that I should have to walk away just because certain people here can't control themselves. If I can manage it as a regular user, the administration should be able to, too. Not just because they moderate a specific sub-forum, but because they should be setting the example and upholding the very rules they enforce.

Thanks for listening.

And hey, Meta—if you happen to be reading this—feel free to pull up any actual example of me being rude or out of line toward you.

I took a look at those posts you linked, but honestly, I don't see anything here that warrants a moderator stepping in. Barbie isn't a mod over on Chicken, and even if she were, the rules wouldn't suddenly change just because of her status—everyone plays by the same set of guidelines here. That "bummer" comment she dropped? It wasn't exactly classy, and if this were happening on a more serious platform like Reddit, she’d probably be facing some sanctions, but on ZK/Chicken, it's pretty much within the bounds of what's allowed. Nobody would be handed a warning card for something like that. And look, I'm not about handing out cards or playing favorites just because someone holds a moderator title while everyone else is free to speak their mind.

The only real "issue" is that you can't officially block her, but that doesn't mean you can't just ignore her within the threads and scroll right past whatever she writes.

It seems to me like you aren't actually complaining about her role as a moderator, but rather just as another user, and we don't allow threads dedicated to talking about other members. If she were actually breaking the rules, then we'd have a reason to step in, but as it stands, there's simply no violation here.

Thanks for the reply and for understanding.

In a way, I’m also complaining about her role as a moderator—she acts arrogant, rude, and seems to go out of her way to be evasive. Is it just her personality, or does she think she can get away with it because she "can"? Who knows. But the reality is that her dark username basically acts as a shield, especially since I can't even use the ignore button on her.

I wasn't actually asking for a penalty or a ban, nor any other kind of intervention; I was just pointing out the unprofessional behavior of a forum administrator. Just because she isn't a mod over at Chicken doesn't change the fact that she holds some weight here—enough to sanction and criticize others in that capacity. That kind of attitude from a moderator (regardless of whether it's within her specific thread or not) sends the message: "I can do whatever I want to you, but you can't touch me 🙂" or "We moderators make the rules, and we can ignore them whenever we feel like it."

So now it turns out she's totally untouchable because I can't ignore her since she's a moderator and I can't even lodge a complaint against her because she's just another user. 🤷

Fine. It looks like my only option is to just stay away from any threads where she posts on Chicken. She can say whatever she wants to me—given how lax the moderation is—but I don't have any recourse.🤷

P.S. If I politely ask her to give me some space and stop addressing me—which is what I'll be doing to her—and she just snaps that she couldn't care less about my opinion and will do whatever she pleases... then I might actually just leave this forum. Real classy.

Look, she didn't actually break any rules here; she hasn't done anything that anyone else isn't allowed to do. This kind of debate doesn't fly in every corner of the forum, but honestly, it’s acceptable everywhere else too. Over on Chicken, this kind of thing is totally fine and passes muster with everyone. The only real "protection" she has is that you can't just put her on ignore, but let's be real—trying to manage ignores like that is technically impossible and wouldn't make much sense anyway. Barbie can hand out sanctions on the specific sub-forums where she acts as a moderator, but over on Chicken, she doesn't have any more authority than any other regular user. If you start noticing that she, or any other moderator, is acting exactly like the regular users who get sanctioned while they get a free pass, then maybe we can talk about the double standards you're bringing up.

Whether you choose to ignore certain people within a thread is entirely your call as an individual, and I'm not going to weigh in on that.

Look, just tell me—if I’m actively ignoring her, going out of my way to bypass her entirely, and refusing to engage with anything she posts, but she keeps poking at me... what am I actually supposed to do? Because apparently, she has zero intention of backing off or letting me be, and she plans on commenting on whatever she wants, whenever she wants. Is this really how people are supposed to communicate on a forum?

Look, nobody has the right to go on a continuous crusade against you or anyone else, constantly picking at you or trying to provoke a reaction. People are free to comment on your posts—whether they’re being supportive or totally negative—regardless of whether you choose to ignore them or engage.

rustydrifter10 said:Nobody has the right to relentlessly harass or provoke you—or anyone else, for that matter. Anyone can comment on your posts, whether they're being positive or negative, regardless of whether you choose to ignore them or not.

There’s a massive difference between commenting on my post and using a derogatory tone to attack me personally. Or, you know, just straight-up insulting me (or anyone else). That’s what I'm talking about.

I'm not delusional enough to think anyone can be banned from commenting. Nor should they be.

I get that you have to side with the moderators somehow, and honestly, I think you’re doing it pretty fairly and decently. But I always felt like forum mods were supposed to be the "higher quality" users. I’m not saying Meta isn't necessarily bad, but I do think it could be a bit more polite and professional—even if it’s an unpaid gig.

Again, I don't care that she isn't a mod over at Chicken or that she hasn't used her authority against me. My issue is simply whether someone who communicates and behaves this way on the forum should even be considered for a moderator role. Is everyone else okay with that? Maybe it's just me.

edit: @nero, it took me five minutes just to figure out how your reply related to anything. Funny, I guess. But fine, you contributed to the thread. I suppose. I didn't mention you in my first post because we hadn't crossed paths before. And now I realize I need to correct myself, since most of the mods I used to clash with aren't even moderating there anymore.

Hey, Tomato, why don't you swing by our guys' corner? The vibe is a lot more laid back over here.
We’ve got a group of us guys who had to go into hiding to escape those bloodthirsty Barbies*...

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