Sexual performance help?

I’m in my mid-twenties—27, actually—and I’m dealing with some major issues with my erections.

My nightlife used to be absolutely wild. I drank way too much... like, I’d polish off an entire bottle of hard liquor in a single night. And cigarettes. Lots of them. I really let myself go, and during those last few years of partying, I didn't do any physical activity at all. I just drive everywhere. My cardio is non-existent.

I quit smoking about a year ago. I've also cut back on going out to maybe once a month, which is the only time I touch alcohol, and even then, I'm being reasonable. Physically, I'm built pretty well—my weight is fine compared to my height. I recently started working out because I realized how much I'd neglected myself, though it's going to take a while to get back in shape. I was incredibly lazy, but things are slowly turning around...
Morning wood happens very rarely now, but honestly, it’s much easier to get things moving in the morning than later in the day. Even if I don't have an erection right when I wake up, about half an hour later it usually kicks in properly once or twice, and then that's it... it won't happen again easily😢.

Edit: My immune system took a massive hit during that period, too.

What I want to know is, will my sex drive come back naturally since I’ve started living healthier, watching what I eat, and doing the stuff I mentioned above? Or should I be looking into medication? I read somewhere about a supplement called Vitasoy. Should I take that? If so, how much?

One more thing... I frequently get this weird, irritating sensation in my feet. It’s pretty annoying, but I’ve noticed it goes away when I lie down and rest. It mostly happens when I'm walking—everything feels normal when I first wake up in the morning.

I really need some help here. Any advice is appreciated.

Alex Mendoza2 said:I'm 27, and I’m dealing with issues primarily regarding my erections.

I used to live a pretty wild lifestyle—constant nights out fueled by an insane amount of alcohol. I’m talking about polishing off an entire bottle of hard liquor in a single night, all while chain-smoking like there was no tomorrow. I completely let myself go. For the last few years, whenever I actually ventured out, physical activity wasn't even on my radar. Now, I basically just drive everywhere. My fitness level? Nonexistent.

I quit smoking a year ago. Since then, I’ve cut my nights out down to just once a month—that’s the one day I allow myself a drink, and even then, I keep it strictly moderate. Physically, I’m in good shape; my weight is pretty much dialed in relative to my height. I only recently started hitting the gym because I let myself go for a while, so it's going to take some serious grind to get back to peak condition. I used to be incredibly lazy, but that's finally starting to change.
I rarely get those morning wood moments, but when I do wake up, things are definitely easier to get going than they are later in the day. To be clear, it’s not even about the initial erection upon waking—it’s that within about half an hour of getting out of bed, everything functions perfectly fine once or twice, but after that, it just won't happen, or at least it isn't nearly as easy to trigger. 😢.

Edit: My immune system took a massive hit during that same stretch, too.

I’m wondering if my performance is actually going to bounce back after I've started living a healthier lifestyle, watching what I eat, and following the regimen I mentioned above, or if I should just bite the bullet and start taking medication. I came across some info regarding Vitality—is that something worth taking, and if so, what's the dosage?

To top it all off, I’ve been dealing with this bizarre sensation in my feet quite frequently. It’s pretty irritating, honestly. I’ve noticed that the feeling seems to vanish once I lie down and actually get some rest—it basically only flares up while I'm on my feet walking around. Everything feels perfectly fine when I first wake up in the morning, but then it starts up again.

I’m genuinely looking for some help here, and I'll take any advice you can throw my way.

Your body needs time to recover. Just stick to a healthy lifestyle and you’ll see the results—I'm certain of it. I don't know what your relationship situation looks like, but having a partner who offers genuine support, love, and understanding is absolutely critical. You also can't go putting unnecessary pressure on yourself; that just makes everything worse. Take it slow and give yourself some breathing room. You've put your body through enough hell already. Definitely make sure you're taking something to boost your immune system. If I were in your shoes, I’d go get a full checkup just to see exactly where things stand, and I would definitely bring up that numbness in your legs with your doctor.
Hang in there and stay relentless.👍

Thanks for the input. I've been wondering... after years of putting this junk in my system, do you think it’ll take a few months just to get my body back on track?

Alex Mendoza2 said:Thanks a lot for the input. What’s your take—after years of poisoning myself, am I looking at a few months of recovery before things normalize?

Look, it’s going to take some time. You didn't wreck your system overnight, so expecting to bounce back to peak performance by tomorrow morning is just unrealistic. That said, the human body is a bizarre, complex machine. Anything is possible. I actually know a guy who couldn't conceive with his wife for years specifically because of the exact same lifestyle you've been leading. His sperm count was, quite frankly, non-existent. He finally decided to flip the script: he started running, eating clean, cycling, and hitting a solid eight hours of sleep every night. Six months later—boom—out of nowhere, they had a baby. So, it can be done. Patience is everything.
I really hope this lifestyle shift isn't just a temporary fix to get back in shape, but rather a permanent life choice. If you're truly committed for the long haul, then there’s nothing to worry about.

Angela Wright said:I’m not sure if you’re seeing anyone right now, but having a partner who actually supports you, loves you, and understands what you're going through is huge. Plus, you can't just pile more pressure on yourself... that only makes everything worse.

Well, my girlfriend dumped me today. Or maybe she did... she gave me this vague, half-baked explanation. Honestly, that's one of the main reasons I started this thread. I have nobody to lean on anymore. I'm just putting all this extra pressure on myself and I don't know how to fix it. My stomach is constantly turning from the sadness. I mean, deep down, I saw this coming... I've been stuck in this low-level depression for a while now.

I really need some help here.

I've been scouring Google for supplements that contain ginseng. I see stuff like Vitality and Men's Health claiming they help with mental clarity and libido and everything else. I'd buy some, but money is tight right now, though I feel like I should try something. Has anyone actually used these? Are they worth it? Please let me know.

Thanks in advance for any replies.

Angela Wright said:I really hope this whole lifestyle change isn't just some temporary thing to get back in shape... I mean, if you're actually committing to this for good, then there's nothing to worry about.

Thanks for the support. It’s a lifetime commitment, obviously. I just hope I haven't waited too long to start...

Anyone else got some advice to share?

Alex Mendoza2 said:Man, my girlfriend dumped me today. It's highly likely that's what triggered this, though her explanation was pretty vague. Honestly, that's one more reason I started this thread—now I feel like I have absolutely nobody to lean on. I’m just piling pressure on myself and can't find any way out, plus I've got this constant nausea from the sadness. I mean, deep down I knew this was coming, so I've been stuck in this low-level depression for a while now.

I really need some help here.

I've been scouring Google for supplements containing ginseng. I see stuff like Vitality and Men's Health claiming they help with mental state, libido, everything under the sun. I'd buy some, but money is tight right now, so I want to be sure. Does anyone have actual experience with these? Can someone tell me if they actually work?

Thanks in advance for the replies.

Look, those are all just glorified "aphrodisiacs." They probably won't hurt you, but believe me, there isn't a stronger aphrodisiac on this planet than genuine connection and mutual love.
Don't waste your tears on someone who didn't truly care about you. Just imagine: suppose you had zero issues in the bedroom, you stayed together, you got married, and then you hit a major health crisis—only for her to bail on you then. You see these stories all over Reddit... everything happens for a reason. Maybe this whole mess happened right now specifically so you could realize you were dealing with someone shallow and superficial.
There are plenty of fish in the sea.👍 Don't dwell on it; instead, focus on yourself and be grateful you have the chance to make some positive changes in your life.

Angela Wright said:There are plenty of fish in the sea... 👍 don't sweat it. Just focus on yourself and be grateful you actually have the chance to turn things around and make a positive change in your life.

Do you really think anyone would want me like this? Let’s say someone pays me back for everything... do you honestly believe there’s a soul out there who would want me despite all my baggage? 🙂

Edit: And one more thing. When I was drinking, everything felt fine. It was manageable. But ever since I quit the booze and the cigarettes, everything just started falling apart.

Alex Mendoza2 said:Do you honestly think there’s anyone out there who would want me like this? Even if I pull myself together a bit, do you really believe someone could love me despite all my flaws?🙂

Edit: And just one more thing. When I was drinking, everything seemed fine. Ever since I quit the booze and the cigarettes, all these issues have started cropping up.

And what exactly do you mean by "like this"?
Maybe you're actually mature enough to finally turn yourself into a better, healthier version of yourself🙄?
I’d say you're prime material for a decent woman... those are the ones everyone is chasing and the ones men always end up mourning, right?🤷

Edit: It's because after years of poisoning your system, your body developed a dependency and now it's in total shock trying to recalibrate to reality. Just because things worked when you were using doesn't mean those pills weren't complete junk.

Angela Wright I can't even begin to describe the mess this is... just total chaos from the jump. I was looking at what was said earlier and honestly? It’s exhausting. You try to make sense of things, try to find some logic in the madness, and then you realize the whole foundation is built on sand... just complete nonsense. People act like they have it all figured out, but they don't. They really don't. It’s just one thing after another... constant noise without any substance. Just... ugh.
What kind of person are you supposed to be, exactly...? Seriously...🙄

Look, I’m doing alright overall, but I’ve got this little issue with staying erect... so I was wondering, do you think a woman would actually want to be with me if she knew about it? Like, say I meet a girl I really vibe with and she finds out. Should I just come clean and ask her, "Hey, what do you think—would you still stay with me?"... I don't know...

Those are the exact ones everyone’s hunting for... the ones that cause all the heartbreak in guy circles, right?

Exactly. 🙏 But, you know... they aren't exactly easy to come by.

Look, it’s pretty simple. After being poisoned for that long, your body basically builds up this dependency. It gets hooked. Now, it’s just sitting there in total shock, trying to figure out how to get back to some kind of baseline... it needs time to recalibrate. Just because you saw an effect back then doesn't mean those pills weren't complete garbage...

I get that, really... but at this point, I don't even have a rifle left to shoot. 😢

Look, you're absolutely right about all of it. You really have to just look ahead and put in the work... stay positive. But honestly? I’m just not there yet. I can't exactly charge forward right now. There's this heavy cloud hanging over me, just this deep sense of sadness that won't quit... I need some time to settle my head and find my footing again. Just need a moment to get back to myself...

Man, don't let your spirit break... your gear will fire like a cannon the second a beautiful woman walks into the room!!!😁

So, look, about three years ago I dealt with a pinched nerve in my spine. That first year? Total blackout. No erections at all, and those morning wood moments... man, I haven't seen one of those since. It was gone. But honestly, the absolute worst part isn't even the physical stuff—it's when you lose your damn confidence. You start feeling defeated, just mentally checked out... and then the anxiety spirals. A hundred questions running through your head like: what is she going to think when she realizes nothing is happening? Or even worse: I’m not even gonna try because I already know it won't work!!!?
But eventually, I just snapped out of it and gave it a shot... and hey, it actually worked. I mean, sure, it wasn't quite what it used to be back in the day, but it worked!!!
That's why I'm telling you, don't just sit there and take it lying down. Go on the offensive. Find someone, even if you have to pay for a professional date just to see if the engine still turns over or not!!!
If luck isn't on your side, then just run to a doctor without any shame, seriously. Most of this stuff is temporary and can be treated easily and effectively!👍

Megan Fox15 said:Buddy, don't let your mind wander... your gun's gonna misfire like a cannon the second a pretty girl walks by!!!😁

Three years ago, I dealt with a pinched nerve in my spine. For the first year, I had zero erections. Morning wood? Forget about it... I haven't seen that in forever!!! But honestly, the worst part is losing your confidence. You start getting in your own head... and then the spiral begins: what is she going to think when she realizes things aren't working? Or worse: I won't even try because I know it'll fail!!!?
Then I just snapped out of it and gave it a shot... and it worked. Sure, it wasn't quite what it used to be, but it worked!!!
So, don't just sit there and let it happen. Get aggressive. Find someone, even if you have to pay for it, just to see if the equipment still functions or not!!!
If luck isn't on your side, run to a doctor without any shame. Most of this stuff is temporary and can be treated easily and effectively!👍

Thanks for the reply.

This is actually really encouraging to read. It’s true, I definitely let my mindset slip, but I’m starting to look at things more positively now. I think if I stick to a healthy lifestyle, I'll be fine. Take care.

Maybe you’ve just internalized a cycle of failures, letting them loop in your head until they define your reality.
Focus on fixing your life. Forget about the girl who left you; there are millions of others out there, and plenty will be better. It’s actually a blessing she walked away now while you're still young rather than ten years down the line.
Start investing in yourself. Hit the gym, eat clean, and stop moping. My advice? Go see a urologist. They’ll give you a straight answer on what's actually going on.

Dennis Miller said:maybe you just cloned your own spirit and programmed a loop of failures into your brain... and that's what's driving this state of yours!!
get your life together first. forget about the girl who dumped you... there are millions of them out there, one better than the next... honestly, it’s better she left now while you're still young rather than, say, ten years down the line..
try dedicating some actual time to yourself.. hit the gym, eat clean, stop moping around....my advice? go see a urologist. they'll give you the most precise answer as to where the issue
lies.

I actually started living healthy recently. Working out and all that. I know there are plenty of women out there, but I'm still stuck in a bit of a depression because of the breakup. A urologist is my last resort, so if the exercise and healthy lifestyle don't do the trick, then I'll go see him.

My take is that my body stopped producing certain hormones or something because it was slowly becoming dependent on alcohol. Back when I drank, the alcohol would provide some kind of stimulus and my body would release whatever it needed, so everything worked fine then. Now that I've quit drinking, the problems have started. Though, thinking back, I had issues even when I was drinking.
I'm pretty sure my mental state plays a big role in all of this too. I'll probably pull myself together eventually... the body heals itself... but after years of poisoning it, I think it's going to take a while.

Thanks a lot for the response. Best, 👋

Oh, right... I forgot to mention something else. I actually came across a thread on a forum a little while back from someone dealing with a similar issue. I can't recall the title or who started it, honestly... I wasn't looking at things through this lens back then, so I didn't pay much attention to the 😢 .

Anyway, here's the thing: after a heavy night of drinking, I feel incredible for the next couple of days—especially the day right after. I’m happy, I’ve got tons of energy, my brain feels sharper, and everything "down there" works perfectly. My libido is through the roof and sex is great. That's just how it is the day after drinking. But as the days pass, that spark fades. My energy levels tank, and while things still work, they get weaker and weaker until I'm just lazy and disinterested... nothing happens. Then, after the next bout of drinking, everything resets to normal again.

It seems logical to assume that alcohol triggers some kind of reaction in me... maybe a surge of certain hormones? I'd love for someone who actually understands human metabolism to weigh in on what's going on here. It doesn't have to be a clinical diagnosis, just a general idea... I need to know if alcohol is actually the cause of my problems, and if my body will eventually just start producing these substances on its own over time.

My theory is that I'm deficient in certain things that drive my libido, and when I drink, my body releases those substances in larger amounts, making me hyper-focused and getting everything working exactly as it should.

And just for the record, I had some blood work done recently. I got the results today and everything looks fine 😎

What do you guys think about this?

So, does serotonin actually mess with your erections, and if so, how exactly?

Seriously... what kind of woman is your ex if you only find her attractive when you're drunk?

I honestly don’t know what to tell you. I’ve dealt with much worse than your situation—though, to be fair, I don't smoke—and my peripheral circulation is a total wreck, plus my blood pressure hits the red zone every single time I push myself too hard. On top of that, I’m about seven years older than you.

And yet, despite all that, I could still go toe-to-toe with twenty women and hold my own quite effectively. In fact, by some freak stroke of luck, I’d say my equipment is actually more durable and resilient than a manual wrist joint—and roughly the same diameter, too.😁

So, I really have no advice to offer you, other than the fact that you'll always have, as Luis Torrent would say, "Biafra."😁

Alex Mendoza2 said:Does serotonin actually impact erectile function—and if so, how?

As far as that goes, I suspect my levels are practically non-existent. Between the potential cortisone issues and the fact that my testosterone isn't exactly peaking—despite having a physique more akin to Mike Tyson's—I'm left wondering where I stand.😁