Stress: Causes, effects, and how to deal with it...

I've got a situation. It involves someone incredibly close to me—someone I can't go a single day without seeing or hearing from. But here’s the kicker: everything they do drives me absolutely insane. Every little habit, every tiny movement, just gets under my skin until I can't stand them. People might try to blame my age or tell me it's just "hormones," but trust me, that isn't it. This has been going on for over two years now. It's a constant cycle of fighting. Sometimes, I lose it completely, exploding with this uncontrollable rage over something as trivial as a shirt left on the floor. Of course, there are deeper issues at play, but those aren't always what triggers the meltdown. 😠Please, give me some advice 😢

At this point, you probably need to see a psychiatrist...

fadedmarlin402 said:At this point, you probably need to see a psychiatrist...

Oh, really? How fascinating. Don't you think judging someone for seeking help suggests that those very critics might need a serious lesson in basic ethics?😉

Taylor Parker11 said:Oh, really? How fascinating. Don't you think judging someone for seeking help suggests that those very critics might need a serious lesson in basic ethics?😉

Look... if someone’s mere existence irritates you so much that you start attacking them for no reason at all, then there is clearly something wrong with your own mental state. You're either neurotic, jealous, or just plain unstable. Something is definitely off with you. 😁

Move this thread to the psychology subforum...

ambermoose22 said:I’ve been dealing with this whole laundry list of issues lately, which I’m pretty sure is all stemming from stress. It’s this persistent pain in my chest and back—sometimes it’s a sharp, stabbing sensation along my side that shoots all the way up to my armpit, and occasionally it even climbs up toward my throat. I’ve gone through the ringer with medical tests; my heart is fine, and my blood work looks great, aside from my cholesterol being a bit high. Because of that, I’ve started following a specific diet.
Even though the doctors have convinced me that everything is physically fine, these symptoms just won't quit.
I actually went in for a massage to help with my back because my job keeps me glued to a desk for six or seven hours a day. For one brief moment, it actually worked—I was pain-free for an entire day. But now? It’s right back to square one.
It is incredibly frustrating...
I just can't seem to shake it.
If anyone out there has dealt with something similar, please reach out with some advice. I am absolutely convinced this is all just stress manifesting physically.

My husband is dealing with the exact same thing... and man, I don't even know how to help him anymore... if I suggest he gets moving a bit—you know, any kind of exercise or recreation—he gets defensive, and if I mention changing up his diet, he gets mad at me too... if I propose anything at all, he just shuts it down... I'm seriously at a loss here... what do you guys think about taking royal jelly? I was reading that it's supposed to be amazing for people who are super stressed, feeling unmotivated, constantly exhausted, struggling with insomnia, and dealing with all those other stress-related symptoms... if any of you know anything about that, please let me know...

Look, I’ve been under this kind of crushing stress lately—the sort that starts feeling less like anxiety and more like full-blown depression. It’s heavy. During one of those particularly dark stretches, I finally just opened my heart to God and prayed for some peace... and honestly? It helped. I still have these endless, relentless obligations piling up on me that trigger all that stress, but I can't let them break me anymore. Just... try opening your heart to God too. If He could grant me this sense of peace, why wouldn't He do the same for you?

placiddriver55 said:My husband is dealing with the exact same thing... and man, I don't even know how to help him anymore... if I suggest he gets moving a bit—you know, any kind of exercise or recreation—he gets defensive, and if I mention changing up his diet, he gets mad at me too... if I propose anything at all, he just shuts it down... I'm seriously at a loss here... what do you guys think about taking royal jelly? I was reading that it's supposed to be amazing for people who are super stressed, feeling unmotivated, constantly exhausted, struggling with insomnia, and dealing with all those other stress-related symptoms... if any of you know anything about that, please let me know...

The most effective remedy for stress is probably just getting away for a few days. Ideally, go somewhere completely new to you. I've heard of royal jelly, but I'm not sure if it actually works. Personally, when I'm stressed, I find that traveling somewhere nice allows me to return feeling like a new person. You just have to leave your problems at home; if you spend your vacation dwelling on them, there's really no point in going. That's how it works for me, anyway. I'm not sure if this helps, but there it is...

John Martin2 said:The most effective remedy for stress is probably just getting away for a few days. Ideally, go somewhere completely new to you. I've heard of royal jelly, but I'm not sure if it actually works. Personally, when I'm stressed, I find that traveling somewhere nice allows me to return feeling like a new person. You just have to leave your problems at home; if you spend your vacation dwelling on them, there's really no point in going. That's how it works for me, anyway. I'm not sure if this helps, but there it is...

From my experience—exactly the same, absolutely the best way to handle it.
A change of scenery, physically removing yourself from the "daily grind"—that’s what recharges the batteries and clears your head.

But if you're dealing with long-term stress—like right before every exam, or as you put it, being constantly tense and worrying about everything (maybe making a mountain out of a molehill? 😉)—then you need a more systematic approach. Perhaps talking to a therapist or, as was suggested, trying some relaxation techniques. You've probably been highly sensitive since you were a kid, haven't you?

crimsonhound80, which chronic physical conditions do you think manifest as stress?
I think some people are just naturally more sensitive, though a good checkup is never a bad idea...

Markoleo, are you even happy at your university? Do you really want to study this, or is that perhaps the actual root of your dissatisfaction?

Honestly, if you ask me, the absolute best way to deal with stress is just getting moving and doing some physical activity. Like, the more stressed I feel, the harder I push myself in the gym, so by the end of it, you basically don't even have any leftover energy to stay worked up... Once you're at that point where you can barely keep your eyes open because you're so wiped out, it's pretty much impossible to keep spiraling over those annoying thoughts, because all you can really think about is crashing into bed... 👍

Anyone even following this thread?

Look, if you're actually trying to de-stress, don't turn the process itself into another massive headache. That defeats the whole purpose, doesn't it?
I’d suggest checking out the books "secret" and "simplify everyday life."
Also, go get a full physical. Don't overlook the little things—for instance, even something like a dental retainer can cause a ton of the issues people talk about.

Be honest with yourself: there are definitely habits you cling to or chores you tackle that you honestly wouldn't miss if they disappeared. Think about it.

Hey everyone...

I’m living in a tiny town where there isn't exactly a wealth of medical options—doctors here just pass you from one specialist to another without actually offering anything effective or high-quality. I'm turning to this group to see if anyone can offer some actual, useful advice...

The issue is stress—specifically, how it's physically wrecking my body...

Lately, work has been incredibly frustrating, and I've noticed my hair is starting to fall out significantly. It was the same thing back in high school and during finals in college... I tried washing it with nettle extracts, even bought those garlic shampoos (gross), but it was all just a temporary fix—purely superficial... until the next stressful period hit...

I've also started getting breakouts on my chest, again, triggered by stress...

So... what's the move? Yoga? Meditation? There's no point in just popping Xanax or Ativan all day... but maybe there’s something else to help manage how stress impacts the system... some kind of tea? Does anyone know anything?

Please 🙏 I would appreciate any suggestions you might have...

Man, your situation is seriously messed up.
Stress and anxiety eventually just manifest physically right where you're most vulnerable.
Take me, for example—I've dealt with stomach issues since I was a kid, and over the last couple of years, a bunch of stuff piled up (nothing catastrophic, really) that had me stressed out and on edge, even if it was mostly subconscious. It just kept simmering until my stomach nerve finally blew and I ended up with gastritis. My stomach has always been my Achilles' heel; it's an easy target for my body to react to stress.
Get yourself to New York City or some other major metro area (depending on where you actually live) and try to talk to someone higher up than just a standard GP. What did your blood work look like?

There could be a million different things going on, but I’ve seen plenty of cases where constant freaking out and life bullshit causes the body to start breaking down at its weakest points.
Like, my cousin used to get these massive white patches in his throat when he was a kid, and his throat was always acting up.
His mom took him to see this herbalist with his blood results and blood type, and he cleared right up.
Maybe give something like that a shot; might actually help.

Good luck!

When you're dealing with massive amounts of stress, it eventually hits you physically, and it hits everyone differently.
I ended up with central serous retinopathy in both eyes... the doctors tell me, and I see it all over the internet too, that the culprit is extreme stress (which was definitely my life for a while). Over here in the States, people don't talk about this nearly enough, but on international forums, they say "Type A" personalities are a huge factor. We're talking about people who just aren't built to handle pressure—people who stay constantly wound up even when there isn't a specific reason to be (http://discoveryhealth.queendom.com/...ty_access.html).

The second this happened to me, I went out on medical leave and basically swore off being stressed. Isn't it wild how your priorities shift the moment you realize your health is actually on the line? 😲You suddenly drop everything and accept that so much of life is completely out of your control, so why even bother stressing? What’s the absolute worst that can happen if you screw something up? Is anyone actually going to kill you? All those fears and tensions really just stem from this deep-seated dread that people will reject us if we don't perform perfectly (at least, that was my deal; I'm way too much of a perfectionist 🤷). My doctor told me straight up: there’s no pill for this, just rest and stop freaking out.
My hair started thinning too, and I had terrible skin breakouts on my back during that time.

Once things went south, I tried to sleep as much as possible because sleep is what repairs the body, especially if you get in bed before midnight (I even tried taking naps in the afternoon). I took some eye vitamins and drank herbal teas to detoxify—nettle, green tea, stuff like that.
I also started paying way more attention to my diet (more fruits and veggies).
And honestly, that worst phase passed pretty quickly once I saw the distorted vision for myself.
I did my best to just not think about it. Whenever a dark thought crept in, I'd just tell myself, "So what happens then? " Thank God and just distract myself with something else.

Later on, since I have a pretty demanding job, I felt like this might happen again. So, based on my ophthalmologist's recommendation regarding my history, I asked for some medical leave due to stress.

You should try asking your doctor for some time off, too. It's just that here in the US, even the most intense stress often isn't accepted as a valid reason for sick leave. I know this firsthand because when this first hit me, I actually had to switch doctors. My old one had been seeing me for eight years and only gave me two days off once, and even then, I basically had to corner her into doing it 😕.

Maybe give meditation or yoga a shot, or something along those lines 😍

Check out this post too; might help you out 👍

So, I’ve been wrestling with this massive issue lately, and it’s this constant, underlying subconscious stress.

Even though I make a conscious effort to stay calm and not let the little things get under my skin, I find myself spiraling subconsciously without even realizing it’s happening.

It’s starting to take a real toll on my physical health—my metabolism is off, my digestion is a mess, and it’s triggering this whole domino effect of other bodily issues...

How do you actually rewire your brain to let go of stress? Specifically, that low-level, nagging tension—because honestly, I never feel truly relaxed; I just exist in a state of perpetual tightness.

I have this deep-seated need to please everyone, to be the perfect example of what a person should be, and to earn respect from every single person I encounter.

I’m not the type to yell at people; in fact, I’m someone who wants to learn everything and master every skill. But when I hit a wall—and look, we all know it’s impossible to be an expert at everything, which is why we hire specialists for different jobs—I can’t help myself. I push way too hard to figure it out, and then I just end up drowning in frustration...

What am I supposed to do?
How are the rest of you dealing with this kind of mental loop?
It’s gotten to the point where it’s genuinely affecting my health and my gut, and I’m at a loss for how to fix it.

If you can't afford a therapist, just grab some self-help books. There's plenty out there.

Look, folks, I honestly don't know what to do anymore. I can say for certain that life has been kicking my teeth in for a while now, but lately—and I mean lately—this stress is actually destroying me. Physically. My mom is battling cancer and dealing with a miserable marriage to my stepfather, I haven't seen my dad in two years, and these college finals? They are absolutely killing me. At first, it was just constant anxiety—you know, the racing heart, the shortness of breath, all that stuff—but now I’ve got this persistent, pounding pain in the front of my head. And the other day, right in the middle of an exam, I had this massive heat stroke sensation and such intense dizziness that I genuinely thought I was going to collapse... I could barely breathe.

I’ve been hitting the gym, trying to blow off some steam and everything, but I’m wondering if there’s anything else out there. I tried meditation, but—get this—every time I try to meditate in the evening, I end up unable to sleep. It's counterproductive, I guess. I heard lavender tea is supposed to be great, too. So, I’m asking: is there anything else? I just know deep down that something isn't right.

I am an absolute empath,
and honestly, the current situation with my father’s health is just draining the life out of me—it’s overwhelming. I’ve struggled with insomnia for a while now, but lately, if I manage to squeeze in six hours of sleep over a forty-eight-hour period, I consider it a win. My body is basically staging a protest: digestive issues, cramps, constant jitters, nausea, and this lingering weakness. It’s exhausting, isn't it?
I actually tried a quick session of Gestalt therapy, but let's be real—therapy is a long game for someone like me, and it takes real work.
Right now, I'm leaning into things like intense exercise, positive self-talk, and stuff like that.
A good massage helps me unwind just a little bit, though.
My next move is to increase my magnesium chloride intake—transdermally, of course, because why not?—
and track down some passionflower supplements.

http://istineilaziohrani.blogspot.co...ev-klorid.html

Meme Man, don't even think about meditating right before bed!

Do it when you wake up instead. It clears out all that sleep fog and gets your head ready for the grind. Also, just pepper in five minutes a few times throughout the day.