The Watch (2004)

computer animation that exists solely for its own sake (think back to that brilliant sequence of screws falling into a coffee cup—it serves absolutely zero purpose in the plot other than to show off that they have the budget and the tech to pull it off)

Thank God someone else actually caught that.
Everyone is constantly tearing Hollywood special effects to shreds, yet here, people are singing praises for effects that are far more poorly integrated.
My overall impression? Disappointing. On my way to the theater, I read an online review describing the film as something between Lord of the Rings and The Matrix, and like a fool, I actually expected that level of quality. Well, you live and you learn. From now on, I am strictly avoiding Russian films in the cinema.

🙄
kind of what I had in mind before sitting down to watch it...
halfway through it got so dull I actually started nodding off—and once you drift off, you're totally lost...
the movie could’ve actually been decent if the plot wasn't so messy—it felt like they just crammed in every single CGI effect they knew how to use just for the sake of it...
those armored combat scenes? the actors look like they're about to burst out laughing any second—just bad... really bad...

expected something a bit smarter, honestly.
total waste of time 👎

bluebison8 said:On my way to the theater, I stumbled upon an online review describing the movie as some sort of hybrid between Lord of the Rings and The Matrix. Being the fool that I am, I actually went in expecting exactly that.

Raymond Palmer8 said:That’s more or less how I pictured the movie would turn out before I actually sat down to watch it.

Thank goodness I don't go into a movie expecting some bizarre mashup of The Matrix and Lord of the Rings; otherwise, I’d probably spend the whole time being perpetually disappointed. 😬

🙄
Look, once you've read the reviews, checked out some screenshots, and watched the trailer—you pretty much know what you're getting into, right?

Raymond Palmer8 said:🙄
Look, if you've read the reviews, scrolled through screenshots, and actually watched the trailer, you should at least have a vague idea of what the thing looks like, right?

Judging by the two of you, apparently not. 😬

casualotter21 said:Judging by you two—honestly, probably not. 😬

...whatever that even means...

Eric Jackson43 said:Just grabbed the trailer.

SO WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR WITH THIS MOVIE??!!

Look, I've got it on DivX if you're interested... I'm just struggling to track down one specific flick, In the Mouth of Madness, so if anyone's got a lead on that...

Brian Gonzalez7, man, he got that DVD ages ago—it was actually part of the trade for Ichi...

Gary Kelly8 said:Brian Gonzalez7, man, he got that DVD ages ago in exchange for Ichi...

Man, I really need to slow down 😁 ...👋 because I'm still out here hunting for In the Mouth of Madness

Brian Gonzalez7 said:Well, screw me and my damn pace. 😁 ...👋 I'm still out here hunting for In the Mouth of Madness, honestly.

Doesn't matter, but if I stumble across In the Mouth of Madness, I'll let you know—that's the one with Sam Neil, right?
The opening of Watchmen really grabs you, but honestly, after that first half hour, the whole thing just starts to lose steam. You spend the rest of the runtime waiting for some massive, high-stakes finale to actually make the movie worth it, and while everything keeps building toward this intense, dangerous climax, it ultimately just fizzles out into nothing.Spoilers ahead. So, the main villain pulls out this spine that’s actually a freaking sword, right? We're all sitting there thinking we're about to witness some legendary, high-stakes showdown, but then nothing happens—he doesn't even bother to swing the damn thing. Honestly, if they had just cast that guy as the big bad in Blade 3 and let him actually swing that spine around, the movie might have actually been decent for once. Plus, he's got that classic, psycho-looking Russian face that just screams unhinged./Spoiler
It’s like they ran out of cash right before the finale and just decided to call it quits.

Eric Jackson43 said:Doesn't matter, if I stumble upon In the Mouth of Madness, I'll let you know (that's the one with Sam Neil, right?).
.

Hell yeah. I’d be super grateful to snag that movie. My collection is sitting at around 200 horror titles right now—mostly Japanese stuff and total trash gems—so maybe we could work out some kind of trade? Let me know!

Brian Gonzalez7, let me know if you manage to track down "In the Mouth of Madness," as I've been quite keen to see it. I caught it once on TV about seven or eight years ago during a New Year's Eve broadcast. I found the film rather engaging, primarily because it draws so heavily from the stories of H. P. Lovecraft, which is always a significant plus in my book. 🙂

By the way, I was browsing your blog today and wanted to ask if we might be able to work something out—perhaps you could lend me a few of those Japanese horror titles you have? Specifically, I am very interested in Uzumaki and Suicide Club. Pretty please! 🙂

I didn't expect much from this Russian film—and once again, aside from that opening sequence near downtown Chicago, it wasn't great. It was overstuffed and confusing, which eventually just devolved into pure boredom. Then again, as we all know, I’m a bit thick-headed—just a dull guy who lacks any real spark—which makes getting out to the theater a struggle, though I manage somehow.

northerncrane4 said:But then again, let's be real, I'm pretty clueless when it comes to this stuff and I've always been a bit slow on the uptake (which makes hitting the theater kind of tough, but I manage somehow).

😁 😁

but we love you just the way you are... 🙂

anyway, back to the topic:

from everything I've gathered so far, the movie looks pretty rough to me, so I think I'll just wait until it hits Blu-ray😛

casualotter21 said:Brian Gonzalez7, let me know if you track down "In the Mouth of Madness"—I've been dying to see that one.

I actually have it on 👋 DivX—Needles to say, the movie rocks. 😵 If anyone wants a copy, just hit me up.

casualotter21 said:...
For me, the movie was actually pretty cool—mostly because it leans so heavily on those stories by H. P. Lovecraft, which is an immediate win in my book! 🙂
...

Pickman Hotel...
Whisperer in the Darkness...
"...the story is narrated, in typically Lovecraftian fashion, by a man in an asylum who has gone mad as a result of contact with the horrors out there."
Does anyone know the best American way to title that? Something like "In the Depths of Madness"?

Gary Kelly8 said:What’s the American translation? In the Mouth of Madness?

yeah

casualotter21 said:Brian Gonzalez7, let me know if you ever snag "In the Mouth of Madness"—I'm dying to see it. I caught it once on my phone like 7 or 8 years ago when they aired it on New Year's Eve. Honestly, the movie was such a blast for me just because it leans so hard into those H. P. Lovecraft stories, which is a massive win in my book! 🙂

Anyway, I was hanging out on your blog today and wanted to see if we could work something out... maybe you could hook me up with a few of those Japanese horror flicks you've got on your drive? Specifically, I am super interested in UZUMAKI and Suicide Club. Please, please, please! 🙂

I've got Uzumaki, but I don't have Suicide Club at the moment. How do you want me to send the file over?

I think I’ve got a copy of Suicide Circle stashed away somewhere on DivX, just gotta dig through my old files to find it. Pretty sure I could track down both Tetsu and Naked Blood too if I really looked for them.

I just caught a commercial for this movie. They’re calling it a new trilogy and claiming it makes The Matrix look like child's play. Honestly, if you haven't checked out the screenshots or the trailers yet, you really should. I am more than impressed with how they've put this together!🙂

My apologies if someone has already started a thread about this film.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0403358/
http://www.imdb.com/find?q=night%20watch;s=all