State of the healthcare system in America: Let's discuss why it's failing

ruggedscout91 said:Medical procedures just drift toward the patient by pure inertia—there’s zero actual assessment of whether these things are even useful, let alone considering how they can be harmful (mostly because we don't have a decent hospice center here anyway). So, you have a patient who understands they aren't going to be cured, and they might want to refuse these humiliating, outdated, and globally obsolete treatments... but they can't get any other kind of support to simply face the end with dignity.

Meanwhile, when it comes to those "smart drugs" and actual effective therapeutic procedures, they seem strictly reserved for politicians, various crooks, and mobsters—while the rest of us? We just get the "final solution," which I already mentioned above.

Cancer patients present a very specific dilemma. It’s incredibly hard to wrap your head around the fact that most oncology patients (with the exception of certain types of leukemia or operable carcinomas) don't really have much of a prognosis, whether they undergo treatment or not. In many cases, we're talking about gaining a few months—sometimes even less—compared to if they hadn't been treated at all.
Now, medications that are proven to actually work—meaning they control a specific oncological issue and turn it into a manageable chronic condition—are still available to our patients. Take Glivec, for example.

I honestly don't know how much you think it's justifiable to fund expensive experimental treatments using taxpayer money when the benefit to the individual is so incredibly uncertain.

And regarding this idea that the rich and famous have exclusive access to "smart drugs"—why didn't Patrick Swayze take one? He shouldn't have had any trouble finding funding. Look, I'm not saying there isn't some truth to what you wrote, but framing the whole situation this way feels way too subjective to me.

Kate Collins67 said:The whole premise of what was mentioned above assumes that every local clinic has its own lab or at least somewhere they can send blood samples without just sending the patient away, plus having radiology on-site—which, let’s be real, isn't the case for most community clinics.

And honestly, people are right to ask what these clinics are even for. In practice, they mostly just exist to write referrals and prescriptions alongside a bunch of paperwork, with maybe a tiny bit of actual medicine thrown in here and there (usually depending on whether your family doctor actually gives a damn or has any energy left).

But what happens when their equipment is constantly breaking down? Look, my GP was literally the only person who actually looked at both the patient AND the specialist results.
It was like, go to the clinic, wait for this test, then that one, then this other thing... then thyroid hormones, which took a month and a half, then another six weeks for something else. Then they tell you, "If you don't feel better, come back." Same old story. Eventually, you just give up and go to a private doctor because you have no idea what's happening anymore. I mean, imagine if you had a minor stroke that didn't get caught in time because they wouldn't just do a urine test and instead insisted on bloodwork? You end up paying privately just to find out, "Oh wow, miracle! There's bacteria in your urine," like it's some big revelation.
Wouldn't it have been way simpler if this was all sorted in two weeks and I was actually hospitalized?

Angela Wright said:I’m not being naive; I’m clearly more aware of my democratic rights than you are. It’s obvious to me that this "democracy" everyone keeps yapping about doesn't actually exist unless we all start practicing it. I have no intention of spending my life acting passive like some worm, constantly making excuses for my own incompetence or inertia by claiming nothing can be done except showing up to vote every four years and praying for the best.
I’ve stepped up into civil society—actually, I’m one of the founders of what’s becoming one of the strongest patient advocacy groups in America. We’re just a small handful of people, but that’s only because we refuse to stay quiet. We don't believe our purpose is to just sit here, shut up, and stroke the ego of the government; we’re here to scream when things go wrong. And it works. We get results that actually help people living in this country. Honestly, I can't even imagine where we'd be if people acted like actual humans instead of worms, and finally started speaking out about everything the system throws at them alongside their diagnosis. My God, in places like New York, there are three-month waiting lists just for radiation treatment (ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!) at the major hospitals. Do I really need to spell out what a three-month delay means for someone fighting cancer? Most likely metastases, then death. Yet, these same people are terrified to speak up and say, "Hey, I've been waiting three months for radiation!" They’re scared of retaliation, scared of being targeted, or worse... what on earth are we even talking about here, people?!
You have the government and the system you deserve. Things aren't going to get better unless you go out and make them better yourselves. Everything else is just talk. There’s the truth—now deal with it however you want.

You have to fight, but people are just too passive.

Brandon Newman95 said:But what happens when their equipment is constantly breaking down? Look, my GP was literally the only person who actually looked at both the patient AND the specialist results.
It was like, go to the clinic, wait for this test, then that one, then this other thing... then thyroid hormones, which took a month and a half, then another six weeks for something else. Then they tell you, "If you don't feel better, come back." Same old story. Eventually, you just give up and go to a private doctor because you have no idea what's happening anymore. I mean, imagine if you had a minor stroke that didn't get caught in time because they wouldn't just do a urine test and instead insisted on bloodwork? You end up paying privately just to find out, "Oh wow, miracle! There's bacteria in your urine," like it's some big revelation.
Wouldn't it have been way simpler if this was all sorted in two weeks and I was actually hospitalized?

Sure, from an individual perspective, it would be way easier to just get admitted and knock out a whole battery of tests in a single day. But in the real world? That’s just not feasible. Everything is limited—we're talking limited staff, limited beds, the whole nine yards. The system operates on a triage basis where you wait your turn relative to everyone else. If everyone decided to revolt and demand immediate specialized care, the entire medical system would collapse overnight.

You can't run a functional society based on "what if" scenarios... because if we did, everyone would be sitting in a hospital bed. Everyone has the potential to suffer a stroke or something else, right?
In a hospital setting, you treat things like urosepsis (that serious infection starting from the urinary tract), but bacteria in the urine? That isn't something treated in a hospital, and sometimes it isn't even treated in an outpatient clinic.
You’re describing exactly the situation I’m talking about: patients want to be the ones deciding what happens, when it happens, and how it happens—but that’s just not how it works. Otherwise, why would anyone bother with seven to thirteen years of medical school?

I felt this was the most appropriate thread to start. I can't quite figure out if I'm just being a bit dense here, or if people are actually trying to pull the wool over my eyes. It seems like every hospital, including Dubrava Hospital, maintains a waiting list, and ideally, those lists should be—to put it politely—completely transparent. While they insist everything is available for public review online, I simply cannot find this list anywhere, no matter how hard I look. If anyone happens to stumble upon the data for this year or any upcoming years, would you be so kind as to let me know?

Dubrava Hospital Homepage -> Dubrava Hospital Waiting List.

Kate Collins67 said:Sure, from an individual perspective, it would be way easier to just get admitted and knock out a whole battery of tests in a single day. But in the real world? That’s just not feasible. Everything is limited—we're talking limited staff, limited beds, the whole nine yards. The system operates on a triage basis where you wait your turn relative to everyone else. If everyone decided to revolt and demand immediate specialized care, the entire medical system would collapse overnight.

You can't run a functional society based on "what if" scenarios... because if we did, everyone would be sitting in a hospital bed. Everyone has the potential to suffer a stroke or something else, right?
In a hospital setting, you treat things like urosepsis (that serious infection starting from the urinary tract), but bacteria in the urine? That isn't something treated in a hospital, and sometimes it isn't even treated in an outpatient clinic.
You’re describing exactly the situation I’m talking about: patients want to be the ones deciding what happens, when it happens, and how it happens—but that’s just not how it works. Otherwise, why would anyone bother with seven to thirteen years of medical school?

Look, it's our right to receive quality care, plain and simple. We're paying for this out of our own pockets! Plus, the tests that should have been finished within two weeks were delayed. It's also our right to fight for that. If I had actually been hospitalized and treated properly, Dr. Busic would have a healthy girl today who could function normally. And don't give me that "it's not feasible" nonsense—we all know exactly how "limited" those beds are and how "short" the staff is, especially since all the specialists and doctors are practically all buddies anyway.
And I'm not even talking about urine or urine cultures here.

Brandon Newman95 said:Look, it's our right to receive quality care, plain and simple. We're paying for this out of our own pockets! Plus, the tests that should have been finished within two weeks were delayed. It's also our right to fight for that. If I had actually been hospitalized and treated properly, Dr. Busic would have a healthy girl today who could function normally. And don't give me that "it's not feasible" nonsense—we all know exactly how "limited" those beds are and how "short" the staff is, especially since all the specialists and doctors are practically all buddies anyway.
And I'm not even talking about urine or urine cultures here.

No, the reality is simpler: hospitals don't want to foot the bill for tests. Instead, they force semi-conscious patients to scramble for results that their Medicare will eventually pay for, only for those same tests to be rerun by the staff at the General Hospital. Not to mention, the cost of these tests is significantly higher than the transport costs, which in my case was at least 1243 miles.
Furthermore, if someone pays top dollar for a private CT scan, the General Hospital won't have to perform it; the patient just does it themselves if they want to keep their head on their shoulders.
Mathematically speaking: the State pays for the patient's transport 1243 miles
Medicare - the gynecologist issues referrals for specialized exams.
Medicare covers all types of lab tests (while the patient wanders around).
The patient pays for CT scans and everything else (if needed).
The hospital bills for: the patient's days of stay
feeding and maintaining the patient in a cold holding pattern before surgery
feeding and maintaining the patient after surgery.
performing the surgery and the necessary procedures.
following up on the patient based on the referral.
Essentially, a prepared, examined, and referred patient goes in for surgery and then heads home as quickly as possible (for faster recovery), provided there are no complications.

Yet, nobody cares about the condition the patient is in while traveling and gathering these results. Does anyone care if an artery bursts or organs fail along the way? Does anyone care if, after being told the doctors have no idea what's wrong but that they might die, the patient harms themselves out of fear? No one cares.

That is why it seems better to wait until you are in an acute state and rush to the ER. It is better to drop dead in the emergency room than to survive the grueling journey of preoperative testing, constantly worrying about fainting in crowded hallways. And we are talking about people who live 62 miles far from the facilities where these tests are even conducted. Or else, they have to book a hotel room and commute to the General Hospital every single day, even when half the rooms in the hospital are sitting empty.

ruggedscout91 said:No, the reality is simpler: hospitals don't want to foot the bill for tests. Instead, they force semi-conscious patients to scramble for results that their Medicare will eventually pay for, only for those same tests to be rerun by the staff at the General Hospital. Not to mention, the cost of these tests is significantly higher than the transport costs, which in my case was at least 1243 miles.
Furthermore, if someone pays top dollar for a private CT scan, the General Hospital won't have to perform it; the patient just does it themselves if they want to keep their head on their shoulders.
Mathematically speaking: the State pays for the patient's transport 1243 miles
Medicare - the gynecologist issues referrals for specialized exams.
Medicare covers all types of lab tests (while the patient wanders around).
The patient pays for CT scans and everything else (if needed).
The hospital bills for: the patient's days of stay
feeding and maintaining the patient in a cold holding pattern before surgery
feeding and maintaining the patient after surgery.
performing the surgery and the necessary procedures.
following up on the patient based on the referral.
Essentially, a prepared, examined, and referred patient goes in for surgery and then heads home as quickly as possible (for faster recovery), provided there are no complications.

Yet, nobody cares about the condition the patient is in while traveling and gathering these results. Does anyone care if an artery bursts or organs fail along the way? Does anyone care if, after being told the doctors have no idea what's wrong but that they might die, the patient harms themselves out of fear? No one cares.

That is why it seems better to wait until you are in an acute state and rush to the ER. It is better to drop dead in the emergency room than to survive the grueling journey of preoperative testing, constantly worrying about fainting in crowded hallways. And we are talking about people who live 62 miles far from the facilities where these tests are even conducted. Or else, they have to book a hotel room and commute to the General Hospital every single day, even when half the rooms in the hospital are sitting empty.

I know exactly how this machine works, and I'll send you the rest via PM.

Alright, I figured it was time for me to jump into this discussion too.
By profession, I’m a dentist running my own private practice, so I know the healthcare system from both sides—as a provider and as a patient.
My expertise lies mostly in primary care, so I’ll stick to that perspective.
The fundamental issue with our healthcare system is disorganization, plain and simple. I am firmly convinced that there is enough funding and enough capacity for everything to run significantly better. We also have plenty of highly trained, talented doctors.

The bureaucratic top-down structure has absolutely gutted any chance of prosperity in primary care. The way the system is set up, those who do less actually spend less, which means more money stays in their pockets. Essentially, laziness is being rewarded.
Doctors get penalized for issuing too many prescriptions or referrals, yet at the same time, Medicare lacks any criteria based on the actual demographics or age of a doctor's specific patient pool. There's zero incentive for physicians to invest in further training or to use precise diagnostics to reduce the sheer volume of paperwork. (Personally, for years now, I’ve been tossing excess prescription pads and referral forms straight into the trash because I have way too many. I can't return them to the agency, so I literally just throw them away.)

Every single day, my office receives several notices from Medicare sent via USPS that deal with things like gynecology, labs, or other primary care sectors that have absolutely nothing to do with me. Similarly, every general practitioner gets useless mailings—paper, envelopes, stamps included—regarding dental services. Just think about how much money is leaking out through those wasted resources. And all this is happening while "digital transformation" is supposedly in full swing? We don't even have functional email communication.

There is no preventative care.

Because of this broken system, everything gets pushed onto hospitals, creating massive backlogs, and then the disorganization just repeats itself within the hospital system.
What I believe a hospital truly needs is a Dr. House type.🙂
We simply don't do collaborative diagnostics here. You don't see a situation where a neurologist, an internist, a urologist, and an infectious disease specialist all review your results together. Instead, everyone stays strictly locked inside their tiny departmental silos. If you don't land in the right specialty immediately, they just shuffle you off to another silo where you have to start the whole process over again. How much money and time is wasted in a system like this? How many wrong diagnoses are treated with the wrong medications?

And one more thing: from 1990 to today, through every single healthcare reform in the US (and we've had plenty of ministers), not once has anyone actually mentioned "quality of service." It isn't part of the conversation, nor is it a goal anyone is aiming for.
The concept of service quality and improvement rests solely and exclusively on the shoulders of individual doctors—their ethics, their morality, and their personal drive to improve. The State doesn't support this. More often than not, the State obstructs it, or even punishes it.

Susan Rodriguez4 said:Alright, I figured it was time for me to jump into this discussion too.
By profession, I’m a dentist running my own private practice, so I know the healthcare system from both sides—as a provider and as a patient.
My expertise lies mostly in primary care, so I’ll stick to that perspective.
The fundamental issue with our healthcare system is disorganization, plain and simple. I am firmly convinced that there is enough funding and enough capacity for everything to run significantly better. We also have plenty of highly trained, talented doctors.

The bureaucratic top-down structure has absolutely gutted any chance of prosperity in primary care. The way the system is set up, those who do less actually spend less, which means more money stays in their pockets. Essentially, laziness is being rewarded.
Doctors get penalized for issuing too many prescriptions or referrals, yet at the same time, Medicare lacks any criteria based on the actual demographics or age of a doctor's specific patient pool. There's zero incentive for physicians to invest in further training or to use precise diagnostics to reduce the sheer volume of paperwork. (Personally, for years now, I’ve been tossing excess prescription pads and referral forms straight into the trash because I have way too many. I can't return them to the agency, so I literally just throw them away.)

Every single day, my office receives several notices from Medicare sent via USPS that deal with things like gynecology, labs, or other primary care sectors that have absolutely nothing to do with me. Similarly, every general practitioner gets useless mailings—paper, envelopes, stamps included—regarding dental services. Just think about how much money is leaking out through those wasted resources. And all this is happening while "digital transformation" is supposedly in full swing? We don't even have functional email communication.

There is no preventative care.

Because of this broken system, everything gets pushed onto hospitals, creating massive backlogs, and then the disorganization just repeats itself within the hospital system.
What I believe a hospital truly needs is a Dr. House type.🙂
We simply don't do collaborative diagnostics here. You don't see a situation where a neurologist, an internist, a urologist, and an infectious disease specialist all review your results together. Instead, everyone stays strictly locked inside their tiny departmental silos. If you don't land in the right specialty immediately, they just shuffle you off to another silo where you have to start the whole process over again. How much money and time is wasted in a system like this? How many wrong diagnoses are treated with the wrong medications?

And one more thing: from 1990 to today, through every single healthcare reform in the US (and we've had plenty of ministers), not once has anyone actually mentioned "quality of service." It isn't part of the conversation, nor is it a goal anyone is aiming for.
The concept of service quality and improvement rests solely and exclusively on the shoulders of individual doctors—their ethics, their morality, and their personal drive to improve. The State doesn't support this. More often than not, the State obstructs it, or even punishes it.

That is exactly what I've been saying this whole time. My situation, and the one ruggedscout91 mentioned, could have been resolved in two weeks flat. And it gets even worse because every hospital wants its own specific set of tests. Is it really that hard to just review existing results? That happened to me—they wouldn't recognize each other's findings, except for my GP. Like I said, in most cases, laziness is what gets rewarded (even though I actually have a decent GP). My doctor was there to calm me down and support me during my toughest moments, and he was great. But it's true, they get penalized and constantly have commissions breathing down their necks.

I have some incredibly dark, honestly just grim experiences with our healthcare system. I used to be part of the system myself, thank God I’m not anymore. On one hand, I haven't had a single bad experience with my primary care doctor (she seems like a sane human being), but when it comes to the ER services... it's a different story entirely. Then again, you have to consider that since I worked in the field, I probably get better treatment than your average Joe (it's a total disgrace, really) because of my connections with my doctor.

I truly wish they would start using actual algorithms, because the way they operate right now—specifically at the local General Hospital, where we were bounced between the ER urology, internal medicine, and infectious disease departments after my GP sent us there—makes absolutely no sense. We had a patient with acute abdominal pain and a completely messed up blood count (high neutrophils, dropping red blood cells and hemoglobin, and a massive spike in liver enzymes), and they just tossed him back and forth like a ball. They kept insisting it was renal colic or a urinary tract infection, which had nothing to do with what was actually happening. They wouldn't even bother doing an abdominal ultrasound. We spent a total of maybe ten hours sitting in waiting rooms for infectious disease, internal med, and urology all on a Thursday night. All based on a wrong diagnosis, which wasn't corrected until Saturday morning when a private internist finally stepped in because I lost my mind with frustration, knowing something was seriously wrong. From there, I pulled some strings without any shame to get a CT scan processed, because otherwise, you'd never get it done through the standard channels—you'd have to go private—and it was an emergency (though clearly, my connections weren't good enough to get an immediate diagnosis). After the scan, which, lo and behold, proved it was an emergency, I used my contacts to get him admitted to the hospital, hoping for some actual action. The "action" resulted in him lying in a hospital bed from Friday afternoon until Monday, in excruciating pain, unable to eat for five days straight, while a nurse acted surprised that he wouldn't touch his lunch (honestly, screw their nursing diagnoses and assessments). I told her he couldn't eat, but there was no IV fluids offered, even though his hematocrit dropped to about 90 within just three days. I've seen a lot in my time, but I've never seen someone breaking out in a cold sweat from sheer agony that quickly. Man, my fiancé really had to show it for them to notice. It all ended badly because we were too late, largely due to those initial wrong diagnoses.

The following epilogue isn't for the faint of heart, but I am so disillusioned with the healthcare system that I have no intention of ever using these services again (as long as I have the money for private care, even if my future husband works at such an eminent institution), and if I ever have to, it will only be through connections. Because if you go the regular route without extra knowledge, you're basically left to die in the street. Obviously, if a patient or their companion doesn't have specialized knowledge or people on speed dial, you can just drop dead like a dog on the road. If I had gone the standard way, that is exactly what would have happened to my fiancé; he would have kicked the bucket just like a stray. Though, he probably would have had better company and been in better shape than he was in that hospital. A place where they use Ketoral as analgesics for people dying of cancer. From the first symptoms to death, it was less than two weeks. The tumor is specific and can be treated and even cured, even at those stages, but it is extremely aggressive and kills very fast.

As for the "soul caretakers" on duty who might try to claim the condition wasn't treatable, I still have a shelf full of about thirty papers proving the exact opposite. Getting hold of the medical documentation was a nightmare; I could only get it through a lawyer after one of our "esteemed" doctors practically kicked me out of his office when I asked for a copy of the files. Getting the autopsy report was just as hard, and on top of that, they tried to make me sign a form saying I had received the complete medical records (when they actually tried to snatch the folder right out of my hands while I was looking through it). I dropped the lawsuit purely to maintain my sanity, knowing how things work here, and following my lawyer's advice because I just don't have the financial or mental strength to fight it.

Anyway, thanks, but no thanks.

In the end, he was a 32-year-old man who regularly donated blood, yet when he actually needed it, he didn't receive it (as far as I know, blood is given when levels hit 90, let alone when this happens in just a few days). I don't know the exact cause of death, but I can guess (pulmonary hemorrhage, where absolutely no intervention took place).

Casey Palmer5
The story is honestly as terrifying as it is plausible...
The real tragedy is that after disasters like this, people just don't have the strength left to fight for justice, nor can they spend the next ten years dragging themselves through the courts, constantly picking at their wounds over and over again.
On the day when a doctor's, nurse's, or administrator's pay is actually tied to how many correct diagnoses they make and how successful their treatments are—which is totally possible, since that's basically how private practice works—rather than being based on some bureaucratic quota of referrals, prescriptions, or tests, then things like this will finally be nothing more than a bad memory. I hope.
Until then, if we ever have to face this, we’ll have to deal with figures like Minister Milinovic, whose stubborn attitudes are destroying what little good is left in this absolute wreck of a healthcare system.

That’s exactly why I’m done donating blood, I'm done using their services, and I just hope I always have enough cash saved up to stick with private care. And don't even get me started on Ms. Rostohar Zorica... she’s this lady who, despite me being his common-law spouse (which, under our laws here, carries the exact same legal weight as marriage), refused to release the autopsy report to me. Instead, she actually had the nerve to insist that I drag his mother—you can probably imagine the state I was in—all the way down to Dubrava Hospital to pick it up herself, just because she wouldn't hand it over to me. It’s honestly shameful. Then there’s that instructor, Kastelan, who practically kicked us out of the office when we were just trying to get our paperwork...

Honestly, thank God lawyers exist, otherwise getting your hands on those few documents would be impossible. Of course, the General Hospital will make sure to charge you for every single photocopy $23.

Susan Rodriguez4 said:Casey Palmer5
The story is honestly as terrifying as it is plausible...
The real tragedy is that after disasters like this, people just don't have the strength left to fight for justice, nor can they spend the next ten years dragging themselves through the courts, constantly picking at their wounds over and over again.
On the day when a doctor's, nurse's, or administrator's pay is actually tied to how many correct diagnoses they make and how successful their treatments are—which is totally possible, since that's basically how private practice works—rather than being based on some bureaucratic quota of referrals, prescriptions, or tests, then things like this will finally be nothing more than a bad memory. I hope.
Until then, if we ever have to face this, we’ll have to deal with figures like Minister Milinovic, whose stubborn attitudes are destroying what little good is left in this absolute wreck of a healthcare system.

I’d love nothing more than to walk into that courtroom knowing I actually stood a chance at a fair verdict. But with the way things work around here and the "experts" we have on the bench... I just don't see it happening...

There are plenty of advanced algorithms out there that show exactly how to treat and manage these kinds of conditions. They’ve bypassed all the old protocols, but here's the kicker—our legal system won't even look at them if the findings come from an overseas expert. It’s like being sued by the very people who are supposed to be judging you... especially when you're dealing with the medical board. If I start digging into this, I might just end up screwing myself over in the process...

Google is already pulling this thread up in search results, which honestly makes me so happy. I just can't wrap my head around how someone could be so heartless while working as a nurse. Especially given our situation—I'm 29, he's 32, and she’s refusing to hand over the paperwork. It's such a disgrace to the nursing profession. Personally, even though I'm not a nurse and my job doesn't involve much direct contact with families, I could never find the nerve or the heart to act like that, even if someone over 60 passed away. You definitely don't get humanity just by earning a degree or a certificate. Over time, it's become obvious that her character is just decaying, much like this woman's condition. And all those professional accolades won't matter once she's been "exposed," and that's something that will stick with her on this forum forever...

Here is what I posted on the community forum for a fresh start:

I have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. Even if I couldn't land a job at any state institutions anyway, I decided to just go out and open my own practice. Hopefully, nobody tries to run me off the road for it...

Honestly, I’ve had pretty decent experiences with them so far. My time over at Vinogradski was actually okay, specifically in hematology—I guess I just lucked out and got a good doctor. From what I understand, they'll even start blood transfusions if you're dipping below 90.

@ Casey Palmer5

Look, if you’re going to post like this, you really ought to bring some actual medical arguments to the table—which, unfortunately, are nowhere to be found in your previous message.
If I understood that link you shared correctly, we were talking about NHL (Non-Hodgkin Lymphoma, right?)
If you want anyone in the medical profession to take your arguments seriously, you need to include the discharge diagnosis from the hospital summary and the stage of the disease at the time of diagnosis—at least that much.
Your post is absolutely loaded with emotion, but let's be honest: those feelings stem from that sense of helplessness, sadness, and pure rage that hits when someone close to you gets seriously ill. It's understandable, but in all likelihood, those emotions don't actually help solve the problem.

Regarding the transfusion—blood is typically given when hemoglobin (not hematocrit) drops below 8, though some might wait until it hits 7. There are plenty of exceptions where they won't give it even if it's lower, or they'll give it regardless of the specific number.

Medical staff have to maintain a certain level of distance—patients often mistake this for coldness or a lack of care, but it's necessary for them to do their jobs. That's just how it works. You don't have to like it, and you certainly don't have to understand it, but it’s a prerequisite for functioning normally; otherwise, most of them would end up in psychiatry within a week.

Personally, I’d like to know specifically which part you’re angry about, and what exactly you think should have been done differently to prevent the situation from ending up the way it did.

Kate Collins67 said:@ Casey Palmer5

Look, if you’re going to post like this, you really ought to bring some actual medical arguments to the table—which, unfortunately, are nowhere to be found in your previous message.
If I understood that link you shared correctly, we were talking about NHL (Non-Hodgkin Lymphoma, right?)
If you want anyone in the medical profession to take your arguments seriously, you need to include the discharge diagnosis from the hospital summary and the stage of the disease at the time of diagnosis—at least that much.
Your post is absolutely loaded with emotion, but let's be honest: those feelings stem from that sense of helplessness, sadness, and pure rage that hits when someone close to you gets seriously ill. It's understandable, but in all likelihood, those emotions don't actually help solve the problem.

Regarding the transfusion—blood is typically given when hemoglobin (not hematocrit) drops below 8, though some might wait until it hits 7. There are plenty of exceptions where they won't give it even if it's lower, or they'll give it regardless of the specific number.

Medical staff have to maintain a certain level of distance—patients often mistake this for coldness or a lack of care, but it's necessary for them to do their jobs. That's just how it works. You don't have to like it, and you certainly don't have to understand it, but it’s a prerequisite for functioning normally; otherwise, most of them would end up in psychiatry within a week.

Personally, I’d like to know specifically which part you’re angry about, and what exactly you think should have been done differently to prevent the situation from ending up the way it did.

There is a massive difference between being detached and being arrogant, or between being professional and being inhumane.
Medical professionals need distance because they are humans too, and despite all their schooling, they aren't always taught how to process the constant cycle of tragedy and death they witness. It’s wild to think someone studies medicine, becomes a doctor, and works in a system where death is a daily reality, yet doesn't have a single college course teaching them how to cope with it.
Because there's zero support in that regard, people often mistake clinical detachment for a total lack of empathy—or, in cases where someone lacks basic upbringing, for outright cruelty.
A kind word and a professional (even if distant) smile won't cure a disease, but it helps the patient and their family hold onto their dignity, especially when they are losing the fight for life.

Casey Palmer5 said:I’d love nothing more than to walk into that courtroom knowing I actually stood a chance at a fair verdict. But with the way things work around here and the "experts" we have on the bench... I just don't see it happening...

There are plenty of advanced algorithms out there that show exactly how to treat and manage these kinds of conditions. They’ve bypassed all the old protocols, but here's the kicker—our legal system won't even look at them if the findings come from an overseas expert. It’s like being sued by the very people who are supposed to be judging you... especially when you're dealing with the medical board. If I start digging into this, I might just end up screwing myself over in the process...

You mention private practice. Well, my experience with a private doctor was a disaster. Instead of referring me five or six years ago when the fibroid was small, he let it grow. I barely escaped with my life; the mass became massive, threatening my kidney, appendix, bladder, urinary tract—everything. I had to undergo one long, grueling surgery. If things had been handled correctly, I could have walked out of a hospital like a lady with a minor procedure instead of this nightmare.
The private gynecologist nearly destroyed me, while the surgeon at Split General Hospital saved me and did a truly excellent job.
It’s doctors like that who make me wonder why their salaries are so low.
To make matters worse, the people sitting in the ministries are the ones creating this broken healthcare system, while the actual workers are left struggling with poverty they shouldn't have to face.

Casey Palmer5 said:Google is already pulling this thread up in search results, which honestly makes me so happy. I just can't wrap my head around how someone could be so heartless while working as a nurse. Especially given our situation—I'm 29, he's 32, and she’s refusing to hand over the paperwork. It's such a disgrace to the nursing profession. Personally, even though I'm not a nurse and my job doesn't involve much direct contact with families, I could never find the nerve or the heart to act like that, even if someone over 60 passed away. You definitely don't get humanity just by earning a degree or a certificate. Over time, it's become obvious that her character is just decaying, much like this woman's condition. And all those professional accolades won't matter once she's been "exposed," and that's something that will stick with her on this forum forever...

Here is what I posted on the community forum for a fresh start:

I have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. Even if I couldn't land a job at any state institutions anyway, I decided to just go out and open my own practice. Hopefully, nobody tries to run me off the road for it...

Don't expect her to pick you up in the car. My patients are so insignificant that I can't even recall a single case where someone actually won in court without having a mountain of cash for a high-priced lawyer. And let’s be honest—they all likely feel like they can get away with it, provided the crime isn't an obvious murder or running someone over.
I’ve reached the conclusion that I can only ask for scraps if I want anything at all. But honestly, if I were that private gynecologist, I wouldn't be able to sleep knowing a victim of my incompetence was still out there. I am still mentally replaying how to make this right. As long as he continues to practice and keeps leaving women disabled, I will never have peace. Never.
I'm currently taking some phytohormones to try and patch my life back together because my mental state has completely shifted. Is it true what I read somewhere—that fools always seem to fare better when they cause unintentional harm to others? 😠