Theme Day > International Hug Day

Fine, but you still haven't actually explained the first part.

Sam Jones8 said:No, no, no. Look, you claimed that people who hug everyone don't actually hug anyone. Sure, you were exaggerating, but that line of yours kind of implies that if we hug people who aren't super close to us, it somehow cheapens those other 😍 hugs. Right?
So you only hug people who are incredibly close to you, your inner circle, your "people." I’m not even going to ask you—because that would be rude (and honestly not even that relevant to this debate)—if you’ve ever slept with someone who wasn't your person, because, hey, maybe you just weren't feeling it...? 😬
Let's just leave that as a rhetorical question.

Some people only hug their inner circle, some hug people they know slightly better, and some will even give a stranger a hug...
Some people can only sleep with people who are strictly their own, while for others, that isn't even a requirement... Or, they might do both (over the course of their lives, obviously without overlapping).

Anyway, what do you think about this parallel way of doing things? And I'm not just talking about cheating (that would be too easy), but say, something consensual. A couple that's been monogamous for a long time decides they can sleep around, as long as they come home to each other at the end of the day... They feel like they still love each other, maybe even more, because their bond and partnership are actually stronger since they grant each other that freedom.
Supposedly, marriages like Belluca and Cassel, or Jada Pinkett Smith and Will Smith...

Aren't exactly the happiest examples, given they ended in divorce 😳

Sam Jones8 said:Fine, but you still haven't actually explained the first part.

The whole comparison between hugging and sex really falls apart right at that specific "parallel."

See, you hug your own people—your inner circle—and then, if you feel like it, you might extend that to others. But you aren't just out there hugging strangers if you don't have that foundation with your own kind first.

I get it. But does getting a divorce really mean there was never any love there to begin with? 😁

Maybe I'm just tripping.
Here's my unpopular opinion: monogamous people who decide to open up their marriages—thinking it'll somehow strengthen their bond or take things to a whole new level 🙄—are actually just desperately trying to patch up something that's already falling apart...

Sam Jones8 said:I get it. But does getting a divorce really mean there was never any love there to begin with? 😁

Maybe I'm just tripping.
Here's my unpopular opinion: monogamous people who decide to open up their marriages—thinking it'll somehow strengthen their bond or take things to a whole new level 🙄—are actually just desperately trying to patch up something that's already falling apart...

Ugh...wrong thread, but bottom line? I'm with you.
I don't see real, true happiness in that...not the deep, soul-level kind, anyway.

Sam Jones8 said:I get it. But does getting a divorce really mean there was never any love there to begin with? 😁

Maybe I'm just tripping.
Here's my unpopular opinion: monogamous people who decide to open up their marriages—thinking it'll somehow strengthen their bond or take things to a whole new level 🙄—are actually just desperately trying to patch up something that's already falling apart...

That isn't an unpopular opinion; it's a cliché.😳 The unpopular one would be the opposite.😳

Nicholas King said:The whole comparison between hugging and sex really falls apart right at that specific "parallel."

See, you hug your own people—your inner circle—and then, if you feel like it, you might extend that to others. But you aren't just out there hugging strangers if you don't have that foundation with your own kind first.

Fine, whatever.

My only question was whether practicing both actually devalues one or the other? Because it honestly sounded like you were implying that, and I’m just not buying it. I drew a parallel to sex because, let's be real, sex is way more intimate than a hug, yet people go around having sex with people they aren't even close to. But those exact same people? They can't exactly go around hugging every single person they run into.

That whole idea of equivalence doesn't mean anything to me here.

Drew Ross2 said:That isn't an unpopular opinion; it's a cliché.😳 The unpopular one would be the opposite.😳

Honestly, I think saying that on LJS would actually be considered the unpopular move. 😬

Sam Jones8 said:Honestly, I think saying that on LJS would actually be considered the unpopular move. 😬

She’d probably be surprised 😁 given how the swinging scene usually works—it seems like people there are mostly just trying to salvage something that’s already broken. They spend all this time defending themselves, acting as if they haven't truly experienced real love until they've shared their partner with someone else. 😳

Joshua Perez6 said:Ugh...wrong thread, but bottom line? I'm with you.
I don't see real, true happiness in that...not the deep, soul-level kind, anyway.

Look, seriously 🤣

Lost my train of thought—which thread are we even in again? 🕺

Drew Ross2 said:She’d probably be surprised 😁 given how the swinging scene usually works—it seems like people there are mostly just trying to salvage something that’s already broken. They spend all this time defending themselves, acting as if they haven't truly experienced real love until they've shared their partner with someone else. 😳

But hey, we all know who’s really under Mod’s thumb. 😳

Not that I care, just saying.

Sam Jones8 said:But hey, we all know who’s really under Mod’s thumb. 😳

Not that I care, just saying.

Well, swingers obviously—it's their territory, after all. It's not like anyone else is being forced to peek into their business. 😳

Sam Jones8 said:I get it. But does getting a divorce really mean there was never any love there to begin with? 😁

Maybe I'm just tripping.
Here's my unpopular opinion: monogamous people who decide to open up their marriages—thinking it'll somehow strengthen their bond or take things to a whole new level 🙄—are actually just desperately trying to patch up something that's already falling apart...

I wouldn't even say that's that unpopular. And honestly, it probably holds true most of the time. I think it's pretty rare to find a couple where that isn't the case. I know one pair right now that I'm pretty damn sure will grow old together.

But they aren't really driven by sex, you know? Like, physical stuff isn't the main pillar of their relationship. Plus, they're both super extroverted, always out with friends, and they just don't fit the typical mold at all.

I have another example too—they had an open relationship back when they were younger, which doesn't seem bad to me since it avoids that "what if I tried someone else" crisis later on. They stopped that around age 30. Then, ten years later, the whole thing fell apart, but for totally different reasons entirely.

So, yeah, I guess it's possible, but in the real world? I bet it's incredibly rare.

Sam Jones8 said:But hey, we all know who’s really under Mod’s thumb. 😳

Not that I care, just saying.

Yeah, totally, gotta protect yourself first. Otherwise, you're just gonna hear: "You're Moralizing and judging us, you hypocrites!" 😳
It doesn't matter if you say "for me," "personally," "just my opinion," or "everyone should live how they want"—it's all the same nonsense. 😳 😳

Seriously, someone move this to "Unpopular Opinions" already, because we're clearly lost here.😳

Joshua Perez6 🤣

But look, I get it. If I show up here peddling some crappy survey results or trying to lecture people on stuff I don't even do myself—like talking about anal sex—I know exactly what's gonna happen. No matter how polite I try to be about it, I'm just asking for a fight from the die-hard enthusiasts who live and breathe this topic.
That's just the way the cookie crumbles.

Sam Jones8 said:Joshua Perez6 🤣

But look, I get it. If I show up here peddling some crappy survey results or trying to lecture people on stuff I don't even do myself—like talking about anal sex—I know exactly what's gonna happen. No matter how polite I try to be about it, I'm just asking for a fight from the die-hard enthusiasts who live and breathe this topic.
That's just the way the cookie crumbles.

Yeah, I guess I did end up sliding into the anal discussion, didn't I? 😁

Sam Jones8 said:Joshua Perez6 🤣

But look, I get it. If I show up here peddling some crappy survey results or trying to lecture people on stuff I don't even do myself—like talking about anal sex—I know exactly what's gonna happen. No matter how polite I try to be about it, I'm just asking for a fight from the die-hard enthusiasts who live and breathe this topic.
That's just the way the cookie crumbles.

Drew Ross2 said:Yeah, I guess I did end up sliding into the anal discussion, didn't I? 😁

I usually stay far away from those kinds of topics😳
It honestly creeps me out when I end up being the last one to post in a thread like that, so I'm always praying someone else will comment just so I'm not stuck there looking like the final word.😳
Compared to your average liberal forum user, I've clearly got a stick up my ass.😳

Damn, I’ve actually gone down that rabbit hole a few times myself 🤣

Because if I ever actually decided to go through with something like that, you wouldn't catch me posting about it on some random internet forum.

It’s a mess, honestly; compared to the people I hang out with in real life, I’m pretty liberal, but then I hop on here and suddenly I’m leaning way more toward the conservative side... kind of like Malcolm in the Middle. 🙄

Btw, we really need to move this whole conversation over to a chat room. 😳

Joshua Perez6 said:I usually stay far away from those kinds of topics😳
It honestly creeps me out when I end up being the last one to post in a thread like that, so I'm always praying someone else will comment just so I'm not stuck there looking like the final word.😳
Compared to your average liberal forum user, I've clearly got a stick up my ass.😳

Error, wouldn't that actually make you somewhat competent regarding the subject at hand? 🤔

ruggedscout76 said:Reading through this, I find myself losing count of all these little greetings and hugs. 🤔 If they even count as such, they feel somewhat performative to me; honestly, if I were receiving fifty of them a day, I suspect they would eventually become more of an annoyance than a benefit to my quality of life.

A "real" hug is something entirely different—it’s that moment where you simply let go and surrender, losing yourself in the connection. It’s a lingering embrace where you feel secure enough to close your eyes, a silent reassurance that says, "lean on me, let me carry some of your weight, I’ve got you." 🕺
Having even one of those a day would be an absolute luxury.

Fortunately for me, there are also those lighter, childlike embraces, though I don't think anyone truly hugs with the same purity as a child. Those moments are usually easy and carefree—sometimes offered for comfort, but often just because love is present. Children seem to understand instinctively that you hug the people you care about at every opportunity, without needing a grand reason to do so.

That was beautifully put. I'm with you on this. 😍
At least until they hit those moody teenage years. 😬

I know a few people who are huge huggers, and even though we're just acquaintances, whenever I run into them, I just take a deep breath and lean in. I really dig people like that; wouldn't want them any other way.