Sense of humor

Is a sense of humor an innate trait one is born with, or is it a skill that can be acquired through practice?
If it is indeed something that can be learned, where and by what means does one go about mastering it?

Rebecca Carter8 said:Is a sense of humor an innate trait one is born with, or is it a skill that can be acquired through practice?
If it is indeed something that can be learned, where and by what means does one go about mastering it?

Well, I think I have just the thing for you! Check out this video—definitely pay close attention once you hit the 28:35 mark. It’s quite telling...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_c...&v=JXVc_hKWoM8

Of course you can learn it! Honestly, you could probably just go out and develop your own set of principles from scratch if you really wanted to.

Some people just have it naturally—others have to work at it—but honestly, I think a lot of it depends on the crowd you're with.

I've had folks tell me I'm basically emotionally stunted, mostly because I don't always react when they think something is hilarious. I rarely laugh at jokes either, so people constantly ask if I even "get" them, as if it's impossible for something to just... not be funny to me. Even those comedians on YouTube? They don't really land for me.

On the flip side, those same people sometimes totally miss my sense of humor—which regularly cracks a completely different circle of friends wide open, and I'm usually dying laughing right along with them. So, I'm "emotionally broken" to some, but witty to others. Some people live for dark humor and cynicism, while others think things like making jabs at minority players during an NBA game or watching certain edgy clips on YouTube is peak comedy. To me, those types aren't funny at all, but within their own circles, they’ve clearly got a reputation for being hilarious.

You can probably find that same vibe in the same situations without having to force yourself to be funny. At the end of the day, we just don't all laugh at the same stuff.

I definitely laugh at Carl Rivera43 more than anyone else on this forum.

Carl Rivera43 said:Of course you can learn it! Honestly, you could probably just go out and develop your own set of principles from scratch if you really wanted to.

I have absolutely no idea what that sentence means, but it's still funny to me. Then again, this forum is crawling with "comedians" who troll 24/7 and are the textbook definition of unfunny, even though they're clearly trying way too hard to seem clever.

Jamie Adams6 said:Some people just have it naturally—others have to work at it—but honestly, I think a lot of it depends on the crowd you're with.

I've had folks tell me I'm basically emotionally stunted, mostly because I don't always react when they think something is hilarious. I rarely laugh at jokes either, so people constantly ask if I even "get" them, as if it's impossible for something to just... not be funny to me. Even those comedians on YouTube? They don't really land for me.

On the flip side, those same people sometimes totally miss my sense of humor—which regularly cracks a completely different circle of friends wide open, and I'm usually dying laughing right along with them. So, I'm "emotionally broken" to some, but witty to others. Some people live for dark humor and cynicism, while others think things like making jabs at minority players during an NBA game or watching certain edgy clips on YouTube is peak comedy. To me, those types aren't funny at all, but within their own circles, they’ve clearly got a reputation for being hilarious.

You can probably find that same vibe in the same situations without having to force yourself to be funny. At the end of the day, we just don't all laugh at the same stuff.

I definitely laugh at Carl Rivera43 more than anyone else on this forum.

I have absolutely no idea what that sentence means, but it's still funny to me. Then again, this forum is crawling with "comedians" who troll 24/7 and are the textbook definition of unfunny, even though they're clearly trying way too hard to seem clever.

Why are they trolling them, anyway? What did 0 and 24 ever do to them? 😬 .

Am I funny 🤣?

I suppose one can learn to be funny to some extent, though in most cases, it seems to be something you’re simply born with. To my mind, a true sense of humor usually springs from a certain level of life optimism. I've often observed that pessimists or those struggling with depression tend to lack a sense of humor, or at least possess much less of it. Optimists have this way of looking at life's hurdles through a brighter lens, which allows them to find the comedy in both their own mishaps and the situations of others. I honestly can't wrap my head around how one would actually "study" humor, but if I were to offer any advice, it would be to just embrace the philosophy of "always look on the bright side of life" and let the laughter come to you naturally.

There’s also that dark humor, you know? The kind that actually feels a bit closer to how life really works.

Carl Rivera43 said:There’s also that dark humor, you know? The kind that actually feels a bit closer to how life really works.

Actually, I don't think dark humor is depressing at all. If anything, it does the opposite by poking fun at those heavy, bleak situations we all face. It acts as a sort of natural release valve for depression and darkness, serving as a gentle reminder that these rough patches are just an inevitable part of the human experience that we eventually have to learn to accept.

brighteagle39 said:I suppose one can learn to be funny to some extent, though in most cases, it seems to be something you’re simply born with. To my mind, a true sense of humor usually springs from a certain level of life optimism. I've often observed that pessimists or those struggling with depression tend to lack a sense of humor, or at least possess much less of it. Optimists have this way of looking at life's hurdles through a brighter lens, which allows them to find the comedy in both their own mishaps and the situations of others. I honestly can't wrap my head around how one would actually "study" humor, but if I were to offer any advice, it would be to just embrace the philosophy of "always look on the bright side of life" and let the laughter come to you naturally.

I have to disagree—that's just not true.☕

neonsailor26 said:I have to disagree—that's just not true.☕

Please, lay out some counterarguments for me. I’m not claiming to be an absolute authority here; I am simply sharing my own perspective.

neonsailor26 said:Why are they trolling them, anyway? What did 0 and 24 ever do to them? 😬 .

Am I funny 🤣?

honestly, it's not even that bad—especially compared to those other jokers🍿

brighteagle39 said:I suppose one can learn to be funny to some extent, though in most cases, it seems to be something you’re simply born with. To my mind, a true sense of humor usually springs from a certain level of life optimism. I've often observed that pessimists or those struggling with depression tend to lack a sense of humor, or at least possess much less of it. Optimists have this way of looking at life's hurdles through a brighter lens, which allows them to find the comedy in both their own mishaps and the situations of others. I honestly can't wrap my head around how one would actually "study" humor, but if I were to offer any advice, it would be to just embrace the philosophy of "always look on the bright side of life" and let the laughter come to you naturally.

What nonsense. Most stand-up comedians—and I mean most—are drinking heavily and battling depression and anxiety.
Humor is a defense mechanism. It's self-healing. It's a way to find connection and validation from others through laughter.

Rebecca Carter8 said:Is a sense of humor an innate trait one is born with, or is it a skill that can be acquired through practice?
If it is indeed something that can be learned, where and by what means does one go about mastering it?

I don't believe it's something you can teach. In my view, you won't suddenly become witty out of thin air if you don't possess the innate spark; it's a raw talent. You might, however, develop the ability to recognize humor when someone else—someone actually gifted—produces it, provided you have the intuition to detect it.
In those moments, you can at least laugh, which serves as a profound relief in this life.

Tell me, if you don't mind sharing something a bit personal, what is it that actually makes you laugh?

boldnomad45 said:What nonsense. Most stand-up comedians—and I mean most—are drinking heavily and battling depression and anxiety.
Humor is a defense mechanism. It's self-healing. It's a way to find connection and validation from others through laughter.

Precisely. Without a sense of humor, navigating this existence becomes an almost impossible task.

brighteagle39 said:Actually, I don't think dark humor is depressing at all. If anything, it does the opposite by poking fun at those heavy, bleak situations we all face. It acts as a sort of natural release valve for depression and darkness, serving as a gentle reminder that these rough patches are just an inevitable part of the human experience that we eventually have to learn to accept.

On that note, I’d suggest checking out:
All Bad Things with Cameron Diaz
Cameron Diaz in Bruges with Colin Farrell
As Good as It Gets with Jack Nicholson and Helen Hunt
Basically everything by Woody Allen

You can find all of them on IMDb

I won't pretend it wasn't uncomfortable at times, but I couldn't help but laugh through the discomfort.

That's the magic of dark humor.

This American production is barely worth using as a poster, let alone anything else.

What’s your take on jokes that lean into dark humor regarding sexual assault?

I saw an online comment recently that really painted a clear picture for me... let me quote it here...

Look, it’s one thing to joke about God, priests, actors, or even animals, but suddenly making jokes about women in the context of assault is way too much for all of you. We all know it’s a disgusting reality, and honestly, people who try to justify it deserve to be thrown under a bus, but can we dial back the overprotective attitude in a group that literally has "joke" in its name? end of quote

Sam Wright21 said:I don't believe it's something you can teach. In my view, you won't suddenly become witty out of thin air if you don't possess the innate spark; it's a raw talent. You might, however, develop the ability to recognize humor when someone else—someone actually gifted—produces it, provided you have the intuition to detect it.
In those moments, you can at least laugh, which serves as a profound relief in this life.

Tell me, if you don't mind sharing something a bit personal, what is it that actually makes you laugh?

I appreciate a solid stand-up set—specifically when it leans into that sharp, dark humor. I can handle British wit well enough, though it doesn't quite hit the mark for me.
I have never been particularly fond of that loud, aggressive "macho" style of comedy. There is something deeply unappealing about humor that relies solely on being crude, primitive, or built entirely around insulting others. To me, if the punchline requires belittling someone to work, it simply isn't funny.
When it comes to cinema, I simply cannot find The Hangover funny; in my estimation, it is an utterly unfunny film. Conversely, I have a great affinity for movies starring Rob Schneider, such as Big Stan—I found myself moved to tears by laughter during that one.

brighteagle39 said:Please, lay out some counterarguments for me. I’m not claiming to be an absolute authority here; I am simply sharing my own perspective.

How many counterarguments are you looking for? Is 30 enough for you? 🍿