The Mask You Live In - documentary movie

Thomas Nelson25 said:I’d say women who end up with men raised with that "masculine" focus tend to hit their goals more easily—mostly because those guys aren't as distracted by chasing women. It’s basically a trade-off; women settle for that dynamic to get the sense of protection and security those men provide. Plus, at the end of the day, women are the ones raising sons. (Which, if you think about it, is pretty much the core of psychoanalysis.)
Maybe that whole model has been flawed all this time—at least in how we romanticize it—especially now that everyone’s trying to push this idea of the "modern man." Though, let's be real, people aren't exactly being honest about this stuff, even here.

Excuse me? I couldn't disagree more.
How are you supposed to actually connect with someone who has buried their emotions in a shallow grave somewhere?

placidharbor8 said:I think of crying as a simple emotional release valve. You have to let that sadness out, otherwise you're just bottling it all up inside.

Crying isn't a sign of weakness at all... I mean, nobody is invincible, and no one is immune to tragedy or those heavy, dark moments in life. No one is so strong that they never feel the urge to weep.

For sure, but let's be real—that kind of self-awareness usually gets crushed by super rigid, old-school parenting.
There are basically two massive pillars when it comes to how we raise kids based on gender.
Boys are constantly told they have to be "tough guys," while girls are basically drilled to focus on being "pretty."
And somehow, that’s the blueprint for raising a highly evolved, self-aware creature like a human being. Unbelievable.

Robert Reyes4 said:Excuse me? I couldn't disagree more.
How are you supposed to actually connect with someone who has buried their emotions in a shallow grave somewhere?

I mean, when it comes to being a rock for kids or a spouse—those "tough guy" types—they're pretty simple emotionally.

It’s easy to talk to them—mostly because they’re actually the weaker ones mentally, so you end up playing the mom role. Everyone talks about guys crying or showing weakness, but nobody mentions that romantic, charming spark women actually want. (They try to make up for it by buying flowers or whatever.) Then you have the total opposite—guys who are all over their feelings, but they lack any backbone, so they aren't really what most women are looking for either. (And let's be real, not all women are wired the same, and they project those upbringing patterns onto men, too.)

Jason Taylor said:For sure, but let's be real—that kind of self-awareness usually gets crushed by super rigid, old-school parenting.
There are basically two massive pillars when it comes to how we raise kids based on gender.
Boys are constantly told they have to be "tough guys," while girls are basically drilled to focus on being "pretty."
And somehow, that’s the blueprint for raising a highly evolved, self-aware creature like a human being. Unbelievable.

Honestly, that doesn't really have anything to do with traditional upbringing or conservative lifestyles. (The world has moved toward liberalism; that's the dominant vibe now.) It’s just down to who a person is—their character and temperament.
Like, if someone is super rational, they don't get worked up easily... and honestly, that’s where the modern world is heading (if you aren't like that, people just call you neurotic or something), though I'd add a bit of superficiality to that mix, too.

Thomas Nelson25 said:Honestly, I don't think it has anything to do with patriarchal upbringing or some old-school conservative lifestyle—I mean, the whole world has gone super liberal lately, that's just the vibe everywhere now. It's really more about who someone is deep down—their actual character and temperament.
Like, if someone is just naturally rational, they aren't really bothered by this kind of stuff emotionally... and honestly, that’s exactly what today's society is pushing for (if you aren't like that, people basically label you a neurotic or whatever), though I'd also throw in a bit of superficiality into that mix.

So, I guess we could get into a whole debate about what "character" actually means.
In most cases, it’s just a bunch of learned behaviors we pick up along the way.

But I've been noticing how this cold, over-rationalized way of acting is starting to bleed into how girls are being raised these days, too. Maybe I'm totally off base here, though.

Jason Taylor said:For sure, but let's be real—that kind of self-awareness usually gets crushed by super rigid, old-school parenting.
There are basically two massive pillars when it comes to how we raise kids based on gender.
Boys are constantly told they have to be "tough guys," while girls are basically drilled to focus on being "pretty."
And somehow, that’s the blueprint for raising a highly evolved, self-aware creature like a human being. Unbelievable.

I am totally on board with this. It feels like no matter how much technological progress we make, our grasp on emotional depth is still so shallow, and our collective emotional intelligence is just severely underdeveloped.
Just picture an American elementary school or high school classroom where you’ve got thirty kids all dropped into one room from completely different backgrounds... it turns into this literal survival-of-the-fittest playground dynamic where everyone's trying to dominate, while parents are constantly stepping in to defend their kid's every move and behavior. It's just one big, endless loop.

placidharbor8 said:But then again, it really all boils down to how you personally define success. Is it money, power, building a family, having a healthy relationship with your community, or something else entirely? If you view the whole world through the lens of dollars and cents and economic standing, then success for you might actually require someone else's downfall.

That trend of suppressing masculinity you mentioned? You see it everywhere in celebrity lifestyles, but if you take a second to look around your actual neighborhood, you'll realize those people are actually in the minority. The big issue is that people soak up everything they see on TV and the internet as if it's happening to everyone, like it's the universal standard for daily life. Most of what's flashed on those screens actually only applies to a tiny fraction—a very small percentage—of the population.

If you're observant and you actually pay attention to what's going on around you, I think your behavior should reflect that reality. No man chooses to lean into feminization unless he thinks it's going to bring him some sort of benefit within that perceived "majority" he thinks represents society. To me, it just looks like an obsession with trying to "fit in" with modernity and becoming overly dependent on what other people think. But hey, that's just my two cents.

I think you’re way off base with that take... honestly, just look around. Everyone is out here grinding—trying to climb the ladder, stack some cash, and just make sure they're set for life. It doesn't matter what kind of job you have or if you're living large in a penthouse in NYC or just scraping by—it's the same story. That whole drive for profit and building wealth? That’s basically the engine under the hood of the economy. It's what keeps everything moving. Sure, you’ve got people who intentionally opt out of the rat race, but even then, they still need to pay the bills, right?...
It’s that same old story—everything being spoon-fed to us through the TV is basically setting the blueprint for the younger generation. It's all so caricatured... like, if the media decided tomorrow that it was suddenly "cool" for guys to wear skirts, you'd see crowds of kids hitting the streets trying to pull it off just because they saw it on a screen. Honestly, if the media didn't have such a massive grip on our life choices—especially since kids are still out there trying to find themselves and looking for role models—the entire advertising industry wouldn't even exist. There wouldn't be a single commercial on the air... But instead, what we're seeing is this toxic cocktail of hypnosis and pure manipulation. They take everything we know about our own insecurities and how easily we can be swayed, and they bake it right into whatever they're pushing as "in," "trendy," or "must-have"... it's pretty wild when you think about it...

Thomas Nelson25

Jason Taylor said:My dad is actually super sensitive, gentle, and caring—but honestly, he never lost an ounce of that strength needed to protect me or just be there when things got real.
But apparently, those exact traits—being sensitive and tender—are strictly off-limits for men, right?
I’ll never forget when our dog passed away; my dad was crying his eyes out like a heartbroken kid, and my mom just started tearing into him, saying it was embarrassing for a grown man to cry like some total softie. It seriously pissed me off because, I mean, I knew deep down that my dad had every right to cry if he was hurting, regardless of how old he was or the fact that he's a guy.

That kind of rigid, stifling upbringing doesn't do anyone any favors—it basically just grooms men for violence that someone else is going to profit from later on.

I only ever saw my dad break down once—it was after my mom spent hours picking at him, manipulating the situation until he just completely snapped under the weight of it all... It was honestly gut-wrenching seeing him like that, especially since I’d always looked up to him as this unshakable pillar of strength. Real authority figures aren't supposed to crumble or weep in front of the people who rely on them to stay steady and keep things together. When a kid sees a parent constantly breaking down like that, they don't learn empathy or how to process emotions—they just feel threatened. They end up having to step up prematurely, trying to play the "strong one" to comfort their parent and keep the family from falling apart. Kids can sense negative vibes and a lack of stability from a mile away... Honestly, parents really shouldn't be fighting, crying, or spiraling in front of their kids. It just leaves them feeling unsafe and totally overwhelmed...
Honestly, kids should definitely be allowed to cry when they're little—it's just part of growing up—but as they get older, they really need to start finding some stability and learning how to manage those big feelings. I actually think it’s a good idea to teach them how to pick their moments, too... you know, choosing a private time and place to let it all out so they aren't breaking down in front of everyone else. We should be teaching teenagers how to vent that emotional pressure before it builds up too much—you don't want them getting to that point where they just completely fall apart... It's all about balance, really. Every extreme is pretty bad—like, it’s just as wrong for a parent to have zero empathy for what a kid is going through or to totally ignore their emotional needs and just fail at parenting...

Donna White50 said:I think you’re way off base with that take... honestly, just look around. Everyone is out here grinding—trying to climb the ladder, stack some cash, and just make sure they're set for life. It doesn't matter what kind of job you have or if you're living large in a penthouse in NYC or just scraping by—it's the same story. That whole drive for profit and building wealth? That’s basically the engine under the hood of the economy. It's what keeps everything moving. Sure, you’ve got people who intentionally opt out of the rat race, but even then, they still need to pay the bills, right?...
It’s that same old story—everything being spoon-fed to us through the TV is basically setting the blueprint for the younger generation. It's all so caricatured... like, if the media decided tomorrow that it was suddenly "cool" for guys to wear skirts, you'd see crowds of kids hitting the streets trying to pull it off just because they saw it on a screen. Honestly, if the media didn't have such a massive grip on our life choices—especially since kids are still out there trying to find themselves and looking for role models—the entire advertising industry wouldn't even exist. There wouldn't be a single commercial on the air... But instead, what we're seeing is this toxic cocktail of hypnosis and pure manipulation. They take everything we know about our own insecurities and how easily we can be swayed, and they bake it right into whatever they're pushing as "in," "trendy," or "must-have"... it's pretty wild when you think about it...

Thomas Nelson25

I only ever saw my dad break down once—it was after my mom spent hours picking at him, manipulating the situation until he just completely snapped under the weight of it all... It was honestly gut-wrenching seeing him like that, especially since I’d always looked up to him as this unshakable pillar of strength. Real authority figures aren't supposed to crumble or weep in front of the people who rely on them to stay steady and keep things together. When a kid sees a parent constantly breaking down like that, they don't learn empathy or how to process emotions—they just feel threatened. They end up having to step up prematurely, trying to play the "strong one" to comfort their parent and keep the family from falling apart. Kids can sense negative vibes and a lack of stability from a mile away... Honestly, parents really shouldn't be fighting, crying, or spiraling in front of their kids. It just leaves them feeling unsafe and totally overwhelmed...
Honestly, kids should definitely be allowed to cry when they're little—it's just part of growing up—but as they get older, they really need to start finding some stability and learning how to manage those big feelings. I actually think it’s a good idea to teach them how to pick their moments, too... you know, choosing a private time and place to let it all out so they aren't breaking down in front of everyone else. We should be teaching teenagers how to vent that emotional pressure before it builds up too much—you don't want them getting to that point where they just completely fall apart... It's all about balance, really. Every extreme is pretty bad—like, it’s just as wrong for a parent to have zero empathy for what a kid is going through or to totally ignore their emotional needs and just fail at parenting...

That is absolutely spot on. We're all racing for money, for paper, for food, for water, for electricity. But there is a massive difference between someone whose entire existence is built solely on wealth and material things, and someone who truly understands the value of money without letting it become the center of their universe. Money can certainly provide a comfortable and easy life (depending on who you ask), but it also brings a lot of shallow connections and people who are just using you, so it's definitely a double-edged sword.
If a person consciously chooses to ignore their passions just because another job or environment offers more material wealth (unless, of course, their passion *is* making money), they are going to spend their lives feeling unfulfilled, to put it mildly. It isn't money that creates quality of life; it's emotions, meaningful social connections, emotional intelligence, and things like that.

The part in bold is all about the environment we're raised in, which prevents individuals from actually expressing their feelings... it goes back to upbringing, learned behaviors, and all that sort of thing.

Donna White50 said:I think you’re way off base with that take... honestly, just look around. Everyone is out here grinding—trying to climb the ladder, stack some cash, and just make sure they're set for life. It doesn't matter what kind of job you have or if you're living large in a penthouse in NYC or just scraping by—it's the same story. That whole drive for profit and building wealth? That’s basically the engine under the hood of the economy. It's what keeps everything moving. Sure, you’ve got people who intentionally opt out of the rat race, but even then, they still need to pay the bills, right?...
It’s that same old story—everything being spoon-fed to us through the TV is basically setting the blueprint for the younger generation. It's all so caricatured... like, if the media decided tomorrow that it was suddenly "cool" for guys to wear skirts, you'd see crowds of kids hitting the streets trying to pull it off just because they saw it on a screen. Honestly, if the media didn't have such a massive grip on our life choices—especially since kids are still out there trying to find themselves and looking for role models—the entire advertising industry wouldn't even exist. There wouldn't be a single commercial on the air... But instead, what we're seeing is this toxic cocktail of hypnosis and pure manipulation. They take everything we know about our own insecurities and how easily we can be swayed, and they bake it right into whatever they're pushing as "in," "trendy," or "must-have"... it's pretty wild when you think about it...

Thomas Nelson25

I only ever saw my dad break down once—it was after my mom spent hours picking at him, manipulating the situation until he just completely snapped under the weight of it all... It was honestly gut-wrenching seeing him like that, especially since I’d always looked up to him as this unshakable pillar of strength. Real authority figures aren't supposed to crumble or weep in front of the people who rely on them to stay steady and keep things together. When a kid sees a parent constantly breaking down like that, they don't learn empathy or how to process emotions—they just feel threatened. They end up having to step up prematurely, trying to play the "strong one" to comfort their parent and keep the family from falling apart. Kids can sense negative vibes and a lack of stability from a mile away... Honestly, parents really shouldn't be fighting, crying, or spiraling in front of their kids. It just leaves them feeling unsafe and totally overwhelmed...
Honestly, kids should definitely be allowed to cry when they're little—it's just part of growing up—but as they get older, they really need to start finding some stability and learning how to manage those big feelings. I actually think it’s a good idea to teach them how to pick their moments, too... you know, choosing a private time and place to let it all out so they aren't breaking down in front of everyone else. We should be teaching teenagers how to vent that emotional pressure before it builds up too much—you don't want them getting to that point where they just completely fall apart... It's all about balance, really. Every extreme is pretty bad—like, it’s just as wrong for a parent to have zero empathy for what a kid is going through or to totally ignore their emotional needs and just fail at parenting...

When parents act out of fear, they end up teaching their kids this narrow, one-dimensional way of feeling things, which basically robs them of a full spectrum of human experience and emotion.

Building a solid personality really depends on empowering a child emotionally while also knowing when to step back and let them go. A lot of times, moms find it incredibly hard to let go, which stops the kid from ever truly becoming self-reliant or confident.
And that's exactly why we end up with men who are obsessed with status symbols and driving a brand new BMW just to prove something.

The real kicker is that a parent can't teach a child something they haven't mastered themselves. So, that ignorance and those flawed approaches just get passed down from parent to child, piling up through the generations.

Killer thread, Barbie.

placidharbor8 said:Nowadays, modern society basically tries to dictate exactly how a man should act and what his "ideal" version looks like, while simultaneously pushing a very specific template for what an ideal woman should be. But honestly, the reality is nothing like those stereotypes, because trying to generalize people like that just ends up being toxic for everyone involved.

At the end of the day, we’re emotional creatures through and through, and when we try to run away from our feelings, it really messes with both our mental health and our physical bodies. Scientists have actually proven that when we bottle up intense emotions, our brains release certain chemicals that create this kind of internal chaos—it’s almost like we’re poisoning ourselves from the inside out.

We’re constantly being told to chase that "alpha" lifestyle—to be dominant, to be the absolute best, and to reach the top, even if it means stepping on others or causing someone else to suffer. It’s been pushed as the ultimate life goal, where success is defined by being at the peak with everyone else beneath you. To me, that feels like a sickness that only breeds division and resentment within our communities.

I personally feel like most people don't actually want to behave the way they do in certain social situations; deep down, I think most of us value much more honest, genuine qualities in one another. So, what stops us? It's usually that paralyzing fear of being judged by society for not following the "rules," or the fear of losing friends or partners. It’s hard to realize that the other person is likely feeling the exact same pressure and doesn't want to play along with these forced social scripts either. It feels like we’ve all collectively become a bit cold toward one another—and I’m certainly not excluding myself from that, as I’ve become incredibly aware of both the individual and collective struggle we're facing.

All this stuff about having a "perfect" physique, the whole "no pain, no gain" mentality, the obsession with reaching the summit, and making goal-oriented focus a total lifestyle... it all just pushes people to shut themselves off and distance themselves from others. They convince themselves they’re these untouchable alphas who don't need anyone. I’ve noticed that it often takes people getting to their mid-30s or 40s before they finally realize that true success is actually about fulfilling your own real potential—developing skills that you are genuinely passionate about, rather than what the world expects of you. It’s about emotional intelligence, finding a deep connection with the people around you, and moving past those superficial opinions from the media, social networks, or chasing Facebook likes.

I’m signing off on this entire post. It’s wild how the media constantly pushes women toward being these mindless Barbies with surgically enhanced assets, all just so the beauty industry can milk them for every cent. Meanwhile, guys are being told that hitting the gym is practically a religious requirement—this constant hyper-masculinity paired with hyper-femininity creates this spectrum of traits that leaves entire generations totally broken (I see it every single day in my own life, just watching people fall for these endless stereotypes). And honestly, what even are we talking about here when people actually consider porn stars to be "celebrities"?

The USA is basically a black hole of distorted values that’s been busy warping the whole damn Earth (and my forum feed is living proof, though I wish it were just the forum).

I had this colleague—your typical guy —who lost his father, his mother, and his brother (who took his own life) all within three years. Every single time he came back to work after about twenty days, he hadn't changed a bit; he didn't show a shred of emotion. He was exactly the same as before—calm, cracking jokes during breaks. For a couple of years, I actually avoided him because he gave me such an intense sense of unease. Eventually, things happened where I got to know him better and realized he was a decent person, but if I hadn't, I would've kept my distance forever. This kind of emotional numbness doesn't do anyone any favors, personally or socially—it’s just a massive minefield of potential disasters.

Just imagine for a second if, instead of "act like a man" or "act like a lady," the mantra for kids was:

Be a human being. Treat the people around you with respect, because they'll give it right back to you.

A whole laundry list of issues, including the suppression of feminine (🤦) emotions like sadness, could be solved in one fell swoop. Just like misogyny, misandry, violence, xenophobia, and wars would pretty much just fizzle out on their own.

I know I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one...

Robert Reyes4 said:Excuse me? I couldn't disagree more.
How are you supposed to actually connect with someone who has buried their emotions in a shallow grave somewhere?

Pretty much impossible, or you just don't.

Donna White50 said:I think you’re way off base with that take... honestly, just look around. Everyone is out here grinding—trying to climb the ladder, stack some cash, and just make sure they're set for life. It doesn't matter what kind of job you have or if you're living large in a penthouse in NYC or just scraping by—it's the same story. That whole drive for profit and building wealth? That’s basically the engine under the hood of the economy. It's what keeps everything moving. Sure, you’ve got people who intentionally opt out of the rat race, but even then, they still need to pay the bills, right?...
It’s that same old story—everything being spoon-fed to us through the TV is basically setting the blueprint for the younger generation. It's all so caricatured... like, if the media decided tomorrow that it was suddenly "cool" for guys to wear skirts, you'd see crowds of kids hitting the streets trying to pull it off just because they saw it on a screen. Honestly, if the media didn't have such a massive grip on our life choices—especially since kids are still out there trying to find themselves and looking for role models—the entire advertising industry wouldn't even exist. There wouldn't be a single commercial on the air... But instead, what we're seeing is this toxic cocktail of hypnosis and pure manipulation. They take everything we know about our own insecurities and how easily we can be swayed, and they bake it right into whatever they're pushing as "in," "trendy," or "must-have"... it's pretty wild when you think about it...

Thomas Nelson25

I only ever saw my dad break down once—it was after my mom spent hours picking at him, manipulating the situation until he just completely snapped under the weight of it all... It was honestly gut-wrenching seeing him like that, especially since I’d always looked up to him as this unshakable pillar of strength. Real authority figures aren't supposed to crumble or weep in front of the people who rely on them to stay steady and keep things together. When a kid sees a parent constantly breaking down like that, they don't learn empathy or how to process emotions—they just feel threatened. They end up having to step up prematurely, trying to play the "strong one" to comfort their parent and keep the family from falling apart. Kids can sense negative vibes and a lack of stability from a mile away... Honestly, parents really shouldn't be fighting, crying, or spiraling in front of their kids. It just leaves them feeling unsafe and totally overwhelmed...
Honestly, kids should definitely be allowed to cry when they're little—it's just part of growing up—but as they get older, they really need to start finding some stability and learning how to manage those big feelings. I actually think it’s a good idea to teach them how to pick their moments, too... you know, choosing a private time and place to let it all out so they aren't breaking down in front of everyone else. We should be teaching teenagers how to vent that emotional pressure before it builds up too much—you don't want them getting to that point where they just completely fall apart... It's all about balance, really. Every extreme is pretty bad—like, it’s just as wrong for a parent to have zero empathy for what a kid is going through or to totally ignore their emotional needs and just fail at parenting...

Honestly, I only saw my own father cry once. My reaction was the total opposite of yours—I was just a teenager, staring at him in this weirdly fascinated way, thinking something like, "Huh, so he really is just human after all." Not that I thought those exact words, but you know, something along those lines.

Donna White50 said:Total garbage of a documentary that just goes on and on condemning masculinity in every single form. Honestly, my only takeaway is that it was probably funded by feminist groups trying their hardest to drive the final nail into the coffin of everything that makes us men. They throw out these extreme, baseless claims without any scientific backing, suggesting that being masculine is somehow "bad" and should be avoided when raising boys... It's honestly unwatchable!
I am so incredibly done with this kind of propaganda—done with feminism being pushed at the expense of men, done with forced feminization, done with pushing homosexuality, and done with stripping away men's rights and everything else that defines who we are. This documentary is nothing more than brainwashing.
Today, women are taught to be strong, self-aware, ambitious, dominant, and assertive... meanwhile, men are having the last bits of identity stripped away—the very things that give them a sense of purpose and belonging. It's disgusting to watch, truly disgusting...

😁

Are you even sure we watched the same damn documentary? 😁 This whole defensive "threatened masculinity" routine is purely your own subjective take and has absolutely nothing to do with what was actually presented. If you had actually paid attention, you would have seen that the discussion on social constructs in boyhood was handled equally by both men and women; you would have noticed the psychologists pointing out how psychological tests for boys and girls overlap in over 90% of results; and you would have heard the neuroscientists talking about brain plasticity rather than these supposed "innate" differences between the sexes.

Try watching it again through the eyes of a neutral observer, because believe it or not, it was actually filmed from a position of empathy toward men (not from your imaginary crusade against "masculinity"). Or, hey, just stay stuck in that atavistic mindset of the man as the provider, protector, and conqueror (and let's be real, your avatar is hyper-masculine, which is pretty telling)—I'm sure you'll find your little herd to run with.

Thomas Nelson25

Jason Taylor said:When parents act out of fear, they end up teaching their kids this narrow, one-dimensional way of feeling things, which basically robs them of a full spectrum of human experience and emotion.

Building a solid personality really depends on empowering a child emotionally while also knowing when to step back and let them go. A lot of times, moms find it incredibly hard to let go, which stops the kid from ever truly becoming self-reliant or confident.
And that's exactly why we end up with men who are obsessed with status symbols and driving a brand new BMW just to prove something.

The real kicker is that a parent can't teach a child something they haven't mastered themselves. So, that ignorance and those flawed approaches just get passed down from parent to child, piling up through the generations.

You don't always have to lay every single emotion out on the table—honestly, just letting kids know they have the space to vent and talk about how they’re feeling is usually enough... The real issue is when all that negative stuff just sits there, building up and staying bottled inside for way too long. People who are actually mentally resilient and steady don't just snap under pressure, you know? But let's be real—most parents just aren't teaching their kids how to do that...
Look, let's be real—status, cash, and a sweet ride aren't just random things. They’re basically the roadmap to success. If a guy knows that having a fat bank account and a nice car is what actually draws women in, then yeah, he’s gonna go after that money and those wheels. That's just how society views value, right? And when you're young, you're just out there hungry for attention, dating, hanging out, and trying to get that respect from the crowd. Honestly, guys are just playing the game to fit in with whatever the people around them expect...

Thomas Nelson25

Sean Kern2 said:Killer thread, Barbie.

I’m signing off on this entire post. It’s wild how the media constantly pushes women toward being these mindless Barbies with surgically enhanced assets, all just so the beauty industry can milk them for every cent. Meanwhile, guys are being told that hitting the gym is practically a religious requirement—this constant hyper-masculinity paired with hyper-femininity creates this spectrum of traits that leaves entire generations totally broken (I see it every single day in my own life, just watching people fall for these endless stereotypes). And honestly, what even are we talking about here when people actually consider porn stars to be "celebrities"?

The USA is basically a black hole of distorted values that’s been busy warping the whole damn Earth (and my forum feed is living proof, though I wish it were just the forum).

I had this colleague—your typical guy —who lost his father, his mother, and his brother (who took his own life) all within three years. Every single time he came back to work after about twenty days, he hadn't changed a bit; he didn't show a shred of emotion. He was exactly the same as before—calm, cracking jokes during breaks. For a couple of years, I actually avoided him because he gave me such an intense sense of unease. Eventually, things happened where I got to know him better and realized he was a decent person, but if I hadn't, I would've kept my distance forever. This kind of emotional numbness doesn't do anyone any favors, personally or socially—it’s just a massive minefield of potential disasters.

Just imagine for a second if, instead of "act like a man" or "act like a lady," the mantra for kids was:

Be a human being. Treat the people around you with respect, because they'll give it right back to you.

A whole laundry list of issues, including the suppression of feminine (🤦) emotions like sadness, could be solved in one fell swoop. Just like misogyny, misandry, violence, xenophobia, and wars would pretty much just fizzle out on their own.

I know I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one...

Pretty much impossible, or you just don't.

Honestly, I only saw my own father cry once. My reaction was the total opposite of yours—I was just a teenager, staring at him in this weirdly fascinated way, thinking something like, "Huh, so he really is just human after all." Not that I thought those exact words, but you know, something along those lines.

😁

Are you even sure we watched the same damn documentary? 😁 This whole defensive "threatened masculinity" routine is purely your own subjective take and has absolutely nothing to do with what was actually presented. If you had actually paid attention, you would have seen that the discussion on social constructs in boyhood was handled equally by both men and women; you would have noticed the psychologists pointing out how psychological tests for boys and girls overlap in over 90% of results; and you would have heard the neuroscientists talking about brain plasticity rather than these supposed "innate" differences between the sexes.

Try watching it again through the eyes of a neutral observer, because believe it or not, it was actually filmed from a position of empathy toward men (not from your imaginary crusade against "masculinity"). Or, hey, just stay stuck in that atavistic mindset of the man as the provider, protector, and conqueror (and let's be real, your avatar is hyper-masculine, which is pretty telling)—I'm sure you'll find your little herd to run with.

You're talking nonsense and honestly, you've had a grudge against me since that last thread, and you're just projecting it here.
Look, let me put it this way: when you're an athlete competing, there's no room for tears. When you're defending yourself, there's no room for emotions or crying. At work or in a business meeting, there's no room for tears, weakness, or being overly empathetic. When you're raising a kid, there's no room for crying in front of them... Is that really so hard to wrap your head around?
You can't just label masculinity as inherently bad, and you have zero proof that the world would be better if everyone acted "feminine." And frankly, you know why—even if women express their emotions freely, we all know they can be jealous, spiteful, vengeful, or master manipulators. So, guaranteeing emotional expression doesn't guarantee peace or happiness in the world. Also, people don't go to war just because men feel "manly" or are pumped up on testosterone; it's more about the fundamental inability to accept different opinions or lifestyles. It's easier to judge others and try to grab more power for yourself.
By the way, you're being pretty ridiculous with that example of someone losing loved ones in a short time. Mourning is a personal process—it isn't universal. Everyone goes through it differently, so him being that way doesn't make him a bad person, and you shouldn't be judging him. That's just... not very human of you.
And just to be clear, growing up, I was never into sports, aggression, or acting cold. I've been a pacifist since I can remember—someone who hates weapons and conflict and just tries to understand people's differences. Even so, I don't agree with you (and yes, I watched the documentary twice) no matter how much you want to put me in a specific little box. Nor do I think tears are the only way to show humanity, which I've explained before... because sometimes, when things go wrong, you just have to roll up your sleeves, get to work, give it your all, and grit your teeth. Crying and whining won't solve anything. The movie is garbage because it tries to use empathy to push the idea that masculinity is a bad trait and that men and women should always express every emotion without any masks—which is just a total illusion and a utopia. It's never happened, and it never will...

When we talk about sex, we’re talking about biology—it's hardwired through genetics, neuroanatomy, and all that. Gender, on the other hand, is a social construct. Everything you guys are bringing up regarding upbringing, media influence, and environment falls into that second category. While research still points toward slight anatomical differences in certain brain structures, those aren't set in stone. Because of neuroplasticity, our environment can actually reshape how our brains function... which means those biological gaps could potentially be narrowed. That’s where the surroundings come into play. As long as society remains closed off to change and insists on everyone acting like carbon copies of one another, nothing is going to shift. It all starts at home. It begins with the family, then moves to preschool and school, then peer pressure, then the media, and so on. Change starts with the individual. If you buy your son a baseball and your daughter a pink dress, you've already started pushing them into stereotyped roles. As parents, you are their primary blueprint. Kids are sponges. You can tell them one thing, but if your actions say something else, you're just setting a bad example. If prospective parents actually had access to proper education and preparation, maybe things would look different from the jump. As for biological sex itself, given how fast science is moving, we might one day all be born intersex. Maybe that will even be an evolutionary leap—an adaptation. I mean, what is the point of rigid sexes anyway? Why should love between two people be dictated by both sex and gender? One day, we might not even exist in this physical form. Conception, pregnancy, childbirth... none of that might even work the way it does now. What will people invent to replace these old stereotypes and biases? Unfortunately, humans will always find a reason...

Donna White50,

The only thing actually funny about this thread is how you’re choosing to respond to my take with nothing but pure aggression and insults while trying to dismiss what I actually said. Honestly, I'm not going to let you drag me down into the mud with you for a dozen different reasons. Besides, it’s pretty clear you don't have anything to teach me, so there's really no point in you even trying.

I never once said the world would be better if everyone acted "feminine"—that’s just your own skewed interpretation of my words. I don't make a distinction between "male" and "female" behavior as such, though I can certainly spot those caricatures people try to pass off as "masculinity" or "femininity." But I’m extremely good at detecting whether someone is being decent or disrespectful, or if they're using aggression instead of actual arguments. I attach those traits to the individual, not their gender. And I don't tolerate aggression, especially when it's thrown at me as a response to showing empathy.

Manipulative, dramatic women are the exact polar opposite of aggressive men—period. Both are just masks; both sides are playing parts, turning their own lives into some kind of staged theater. Real authenticity and personal integrity are something else entirely, lightyears away from those roles. Authentic people, regardless of gender, don't feel the need to wage war on any level. Suppressing emotions leads to an emotional numbness that often spirals into violence, particularly with men, since society implicitly or explicitly encourages it as the ultimate proof of "manliness." And that's how we end up with domestic, social, and international violence—it was made incredibly vivid in that movie, and I shouldn't have to explain it since you claim to have watched it a few times already.

Then there's your other wildly rude interpretation regarding my colleague—I didn't judge him; I simply kept my distance because there was zero emotional connection coming from his side. And I wasn't the only one who felt that way. When people are emotionally stunted, they don't just lock away sadness—they lock away warmth, empathy, joy, anger—pretty much everything. A person starts acting like a robot. My point was simply that it is incredibly difficult to figure out the right way to interact with someone like that.

Obviously, it's essential to stay in touch with your own emotions, regardless of whether you're a man or a woman. But I see now that I'm wasting my breath because you insist on thinking in these black-and-white, gendered boxes, even though I've already explicitly stated that emotions are inherent to humanity and anyone who suppresses them is primarily doing a disservice to themselves. That person could be a woman or a man. That's all there is to it.

Jeffrey Ramos4 said:When we talk about sex, we’re talking about biology—it's hardwired through genetics, neuroanatomy, and all that. Gender, on the other hand, is a social construct. Everything you guys are bringing up regarding upbringing, media influence, and environment falls into that second category. While research still points toward slight anatomical differences in certain brain structures, those aren't set in stone. Because of neuroplasticity, our environment can actually reshape how our brains function... which means those biological gaps could potentially be narrowed. That’s where the surroundings come into play. As long as society remains closed off to change and insists on everyone acting like carbon copies of one another, nothing is going to shift. It all starts at home. It begins with the family, then moves to preschool and school, then peer pressure, then the media, and so on. Change starts with the individual. If you buy your son a baseball and your daughter a pink dress, you've already started pushing them into stereotyped roles. As parents, you are their primary blueprint. Kids are sponges. You can tell them one thing, but if your actions say something else, you're just setting a bad example. If prospective parents actually had access to proper education and preparation, maybe things would look different from the jump. As for biological sex itself, given how fast science is moving, we might one day all be born intersex. Maybe that will even be an evolutionary leap—an adaptation. I mean, what is the point of rigid sexes anyway? Why should love between two people be dictated by both sex and gender? One day, we might not even exist in this physical form. Conception, pregnancy, childbirth... none of that might even work the way it does now. What will people invent to replace these old stereotypes and biases? Unfortunately, humans will always find a reason...

I totally agree that parents should be educated on how to raise kids and understand their needs. Nobody really prepares us for parenthood, so when we have kids, we're basically left to our own devices—just trying to figure it out and using whatever parenting styles we think are right. And more often than not, we just end up repeating the exact same patterns our own parents used on us.
You brought up the whole debate between gender roles and biological predisposition. Honestly, in today's world, it's incredibly hard to untangle the two because they're so intertwined. We can't just pop people into an incubator to see what's purely biological versus what's learned or forced behavior, and I don't think we ever will be able to tell them apart. That’s why this topic is such a lightning rod for different perspectives—people have been fighting over this forever, whether it's in religious circles or medical studies.
Personally, I think having different sexes is a biological necessity—it's the result of millions of years of evolution for a reason, regardless of what we think about it. Men and women have different biological needs and react differently, and I honestly think that's a strength rather than a flaw...

Sean Kern2 said:Donna White50,

The only thing actually funny about this thread is how you’re choosing to respond to my take with nothing but pure aggression and insults while trying to dismiss what I actually said. Honestly, I'm not going to let you drag me down into the mud with you for a dozen different reasons. Besides, it’s pretty clear you don't have anything to teach me, so there's really no point in you even trying.

I never once said the world would be better if everyone acted "feminine"—that’s just your own skewed interpretation of my words. I don't make a distinction between "male" and "female" behavior as such, though I can certainly spot those caricatures people try to pass off as "masculinity" or "femininity." But I’m extremely good at detecting whether someone is being decent or disrespectful, or if they're using aggression instead of actual arguments. I attach those traits to the individual, not their gender. And I don't tolerate aggression, especially when it's thrown at me as a response to showing empathy.

Manipulative, dramatic women are the exact polar opposite of aggressive men—period. Both are just masks; both sides are playing parts, turning their own lives into some kind of staged theater. Real authenticity and personal integrity are something else entirely, lightyears away from those roles. Authentic people, regardless of gender, don't feel the need to wage war on any level. Suppressing emotions leads to an emotional numbness that often spirals into violence, particularly with men, since society implicitly or explicitly encourages it as the ultimate proof of "manliness." And that's how we end up with domestic, social, and international violence—it was made incredibly vivid in that movie, and I shouldn't have to explain it since you claim to have watched it a few times already.

Then there's your other wildly rude interpretation regarding my colleague—I didn't judge him; I simply kept my distance because there was zero emotional connection coming from his side. And I wasn't the only one who felt that way. When people are emotionally stunted, they don't just lock away sadness—they lock away warmth, empathy, joy, anger—pretty much everything. A person starts acting like a robot. My point was simply that it is incredibly difficult to figure out the right way to interact with someone like that.

Obviously, it's essential to stay in touch with your own emotions, regardless of whether you're a man or a woman. But I see now that I'm wasting my breath because you insist on thinking in these black-and-white, gendered boxes, even though I've already explicitly stated that emotions are inherent to humanity and anyone who suppresses them is primarily doing a disservice to themselves. That person could be a woman or a man. That's all there is to it.

So if I’m really such an annoying person to talk to and I’m supposedly insulting you... why are you even wasting your breath on me? Honestly... and now, let's get back to the actual arguments...
Look, you didn't just judge him—you basically shut him out entirely. There’s a huge difference between avoiding someone and actually condemning them for who they are. You claim to be this super tolerant, empathetic person, but if that were true, you probably would've shown some genuine interest in his perspective... maybe even offered a little support or a listening ear to help him open up about how much he's struggling. Instead, you just turned your back on him. I mean, what business do you even have with someone like that? At the end of the day, you have every right to not like certain people or choose not to hang out with them—just like I have zero patience for people who act overly soft or wishy-washy. But also, that idea that people who can't express sadness are somehow "stuck" and missing out on other emotions? That's just not true at all, there's no science to back that up... Some people deal with depression by just retreating inward—pulling away from the world to protect themselves from the pain. In those cases, they kind of go numb to everything around them. Usually, it's just a temporary thing, too... most people eventually find their footing again and come back to themselves.
When you look at those extreme cases of abuse and harassment—it's pretty obvious they trigger these massive behavioral outbursts and deep-seated mental struggles that people just carry around with them forever... So, I guess the movie uses those intense scenarios to really paint the full picture of what we're dealing with...
Look, let me break it down—boys grow up, and playing games is just part of the deal. It’s how they test their strength, figure out who’s in charge, and measure their own success. Honestly, it’s just biological wiring meant to ensure survival... so while the boys are busy racing cars or acting out little war games to test their grit, women tend to lean into that whole vibe of being nurturing and magnetic. That’s just how the deck is stacked. It’s always been this way, and frankly, it’s perfectly natural. I don't have much faith in psychiatry, but even so, no shrink should be walking around pushing their own baseless opinions about how we "need" to change this. It's even worse when they try to label these natural behaviors as negative or something that needs to be suppressed. Their job isn't to redesign human nature—it's to deal with the extreme, antisocial stuff that actually breaks society. That's where their expertise should stay... anything else is just noise...
I guess my black-and-white outlook makes sense, considering how people over here act like extreme behavior is just the norm—like it’s some kind of reflection of what everyone is actually doing... which, honestly, isn't true at all. If we're going to talk about extremes, then I’ve got every right to use an extreme lens and a bit of a binary framework too. To wrap this up, let's face it: we all wear masks. They’re just part of life, really—a way to protect our privacy and keep ourselves from being too vulnerable around others. Suppressing your feelings has always been a survival mechanism in society, and it’s a total illusion to think that being wide open and showing vulnerability in such a dangerous world is actually going to pay off. Everyone needs to find their own way to express what they're feeling in a way that works for them, and there are plenty of ways out there once you learn how... People love watching those documentaries about peace and love in the world because it's easy to swallow, but the reality is that those things have zero basis in actual practice. The bitter truth we all live in—the one we can't escape—is that it's simply impossible to satisfy everyone's individual wants and needs...

Donna White50 said:Thomas Nelson25

You don't always have to lay every single emotion out on the table—honestly, just letting kids know they have the space to vent and talk about how they’re feeling is usually enough... The real issue is when all that negative stuff just sits there, building up and staying bottled inside for way too long. People who are actually mentally resilient and steady don't just snap under pressure, you know? But let's be real—most parents just aren't teaching their kids how to do that...
Look, let's be real—status, cash, and a sweet ride aren't just random things. They’re basically the roadmap to success. If a guy knows that having a fat bank account and a nice car is what actually draws women in, then yeah, he’s gonna go after that money and those wheels. That's just how society views value, right? And when you're young, you're just out there hungry for attention, dating, hanging out, and trying to get that respect from the crowd. Honestly, guys are just playing the game to fit in with whatever the people around them expect...

Thomas Nelson25

You're talking nonsense and honestly, you've had a grudge against me since that last thread, and you're just projecting it here.
Look, let me put it this way: when you're an athlete competing, there's no room for tears. When you're defending yourself, there's no room for emotions or crying. At work or in a business meeting, there's no room for tears, weakness, or being overly empathetic. When you're raising a kid, there's no room for crying in front of them... Is that really so hard to wrap your head around?
You can't just label masculinity as inherently bad, and you have zero proof that the world would be better if everyone acted "feminine." And frankly, you know why—even if women express their emotions freely, we all know they can be jealous, spiteful, vengeful, or master manipulators. So, guaranteeing emotional expression doesn't guarantee peace or happiness in the world. Also, people don't go to war just because men feel "manly" or are pumped up on testosterone; it's more about the fundamental inability to accept different opinions or lifestyles. It's easier to judge others and try to grab more power for yourself.
By the way, you're being pretty ridiculous with that example of someone losing loved ones in a short time. Mourning is a personal process—it isn't universal. Everyone goes through it differently, so him being that way doesn't make him a bad person, and you shouldn't be judging him. That's just... not very human of you.
And just to be clear, growing up, I was never into sports, aggression, or acting cold. I've been a pacifist since I can remember—someone who hates weapons and conflict and just tries to understand people's differences. Even so, I don't agree with you (and yes, I watched the documentary twice) no matter how much you want to put me in a specific little box. Nor do I think tears are the only way to show humanity, which I've explained before... because sometimes, when things go wrong, you just have to roll up your sleeves, get to work, give it your all, and grit your teeth. Crying and whining won't solve anything. The movie is garbage because it tries to use empathy to push the idea that masculinity is a bad trait and that men and women should always express every emotion without any masks—which is just a total illusion and a utopia. It's never happened, and it never will...

Are you actually serious?
What am I supposed to do instead? Am I expected to play some kind of superhero parent because crying is somehow... an undesirable human reaction that needs to be suppressed? Is it a sign of weakness? Are we telling kids they should only ever see this sanitized image of courage?

alone, and you know why—because regardless of how much women express their emotions, we all know how they can be jealous, malicious, vengeful, and incredibly skilled manipulators...

Just women? Not men?

People don't go to war because men feel like men and are so pumped up on testosterone that they can't accept anyone else's opinion or way of life, making it easier to judge others and seize more rights for themselves.

It isn't just men fighting wars; women fight them too. And it has absolutely nothing to do with testosterone levels—it's about money. Wars are fought for money. Period. That is the entire philosophy of warfare.

Sean Kern2 and Donna White50, seriously, dial it back a notch. Stop taking this debate so personally. If you two have lingering baggage or issues from previous discussions that need sorting out, take it to private messages instead of dragging it through this thread. 😉

Andrew Doyle said:Are you actually serious?
What am I supposed to do instead? Am I expected to play some kind of superhero parent because crying is somehow... an undesirable human reaction that needs to be suppressed? Is it a sign of weakness? Are we telling kids they should only ever see this sanitized image of courage?

alone, and you know why—because regardless of how much women express their emotions, we all know how they can be jealous, malicious, vengeful, and incredibly skilled manipulators...

Just women? Not men?

People don't go to war because men feel like men and are so pumped up on testosterone that they can't accept anyone else's opinion or way of life, making it easier to judge others and seize more rights for themselves.

It isn't just men fighting wars; women fight them too. And it has absolutely nothing to do with testosterone levels—it's about money. Wars are fought for money. Period. That is the entire philosophy of warfare.

Look, every parent is basically a superhero—raising kids is one of the hardest jobs out there. If a parent wants to maintain authority, they also need to avoid falling apart in front of their kids. Kids tend to take on the guilt and responsibility for their parents' struggles, and usually, they actually do... There’s really no point in dumping our problems or fragile emotional states onto them, because it hits kids pretty hard..
Exactly. Both men and women have their own behavioral flaws, and let's face it—tears aren't some magic recipe for happiness, nor are they a solution to stop wars, aggression, or whatever else...
I'm with you, people fight for power and profit...

Donna White50 said:Look, every parent is basically a superhero—raising kids is one of the hardest jobs out there. If a parent wants to maintain authority, they also need to avoid falling apart in front of their kids. Kids tend to take on the guilt and responsibility for their parents' struggles, and usually, they actually do... There’s really no point in dumping our problems or fragile emotional states onto them, because it hits kids pretty hard..
Exactly. Both men and women have their own behavioral flaws, and let's face it—tears aren't some magic recipe for happiness, nor are they a solution to stop wars, aggression, or whatever else...
I'm with you, people fight for power and profit...

A moment ago, you were talking about tears, not an emotional breakdown. Or are you conflating the two? (Please define exactly what you mean by "breakdown" so we can avoid any more of this communication noise)

And do you honestly believe that in such a scenario—showing vulnerability—a parent loses their authority? (I’m assuming you actually understand the definition of authority and realize there are various different types of it)

Andrew Doyle said:A moment ago, you were talking about tears, not an emotional breakdown. Or are you conflating the two? (Please define exactly what you mean by "breakdown" so we can avoid any more of this communication noise)

And do you honestly believe that in such a scenario—showing vulnerability—a parent loses their authority? (I’m assuming you actually understand the definition of authority and realize there are various different types of it)

To me, breaking down means losing your emotional footing—like going into hysterics, sobbing uncontrollably, or total despair... stuff nobody wants to deal with, especially kids.
And if we're talking about crying, let's be real—in everyday life, we rarely find ourselves weeping in front of people. Unless it's losing someone close or some massive life shock, most of us only let it out during those rare moments of pure joy or maybe after a really heavy movie scene...
Just as a side note, I grew up in a household where emotional outbursts were pretty much a daily occurrence...
Parental authority is all about trust and respect, which is something you actually have to earn from your kids. I'm not a fan of being overly strict, but hey, rules are rules. Personally, I think a parent loses their grip when they show too much weakness—because a kid needs someone they can lean on, someone who gets them and can actually help. If the adult loses their footing and can't step up, that child's respect usually goes right out the window... Plus, parents should push their kids to reach their full potential in a healthy way, and sometimes that means grit, gritting your teeth, and holding back the tears...

Jason Taylor said:So, I guess we could get into a whole debate about what "character" actually means.
In most cases, it’s just a bunch of learned behaviors we pick up along the way.

But I've been noticing how this cold, over-rationalized way of acting is starting to bleed into how girls are being raised these days, too. Maybe I'm totally off base here, though.

Whether it’s learned stuff from society, genetics, or even personal growth and self-correction—that’s possible, but it's really a journey of self-discovery. (Side note: I definitely lean toward that spiritual psychology approach)
Anyway, that's basically what various therapies do, except you have a counselor or mentor listening and giving advice. (Which often ends up being a form of programming, too)

Alright, I'm rambling a bit... so, anyway,

It feels like feminism has pushed women to mimic the male mindset—or maybe the system itself, through its values and goals, raises them that way—while stripping away all those innate feminine qualities. Instead of liberating women, it seems to have just piled on more weight to carry.
At the same time, you see more men becoming insecure—they're actually intimidated by these women because they live in a world where they aren't expected to be the providers/protectors anymore. And honestly? It's because that's how they were raised.

Donna White50 said:I totally agree that parents should be educated on how to raise kids and understand their needs. Nobody really prepares us for parenthood, so when we have kids, we're basically left to our own devices—just trying to figure it out and using whatever parenting styles we think are right. And more often than not, we just end up repeating the exact same patterns our own parents used on us.
You brought up the whole debate between gender roles and biological predisposition. Honestly, in today's world, it's incredibly hard to untangle the two because they're so intertwined. We can't just pop people into an incubator to see what's purely biological versus what's learned or forced behavior, and I don't think we ever will be able to tell them apart. That’s why this topic is such a lightning rod for different perspectives—people have been fighting over this forever, whether it's in religious circles or medical studies.
Personally, I think having different sexes is a biological necessity—it's the result of millions of years of evolution for a reason, regardless of what we think about it. Men and women have different biological needs and react differently, and I honestly think that's a strength rather than a flaw...

So if I’m really such an annoying person to talk to and I’m supposedly insulting you... why are you even wasting your breath on me? Honestly... and now, let's get back to the actual arguments...
Look, you didn't just judge him—you basically shut him out entirely. There’s a huge difference between avoiding someone and actually condemning them for who they are. You claim to be this super tolerant, empathetic person, but if that were true, you probably would've shown some genuine interest in his perspective... maybe even offered a little support or a listening ear to help him open up about how much he's struggling. Instead, you just turned your back on him. I mean, what business do you even have with someone like that? At the end of the day, you have every right to not like certain people or choose not to hang out with them—just like I have zero patience for people who act overly soft or wishy-washy. But also, that idea that people who can't express sadness are somehow "stuck" and missing out on other emotions? That's just not true at all, there's no science to back that up... Some people deal with depression by just retreating inward—pulling away from the world to protect themselves from the pain. In those cases, they kind of go numb to everything around them. Usually, it's just a temporary thing, too... most people eventually find their footing again and come back to themselves.
When you look at those extreme cases of abuse and harassment—it's pretty obvious they trigger these massive behavioral outbursts and deep-seated mental struggles that people just carry around with them forever... So, I guess the movie uses those intense scenarios to really paint the full picture of what we're dealing with...
Look, let me break it down—boys grow up, and playing games is just part of the deal. It’s how they test their strength, figure out who’s in charge, and measure their own success. Honestly, it’s just biological wiring meant to ensure survival... so while the boys are busy racing cars or acting out little war games to test their grit, women tend to lean into that whole vibe of being nurturing and magnetic. That’s just how the deck is stacked. It’s always been this way, and frankly, it’s perfectly natural. I don't have much faith in psychiatry, but even so, no shrink should be walking around pushing their own baseless opinions about how we "need" to change this. It's even worse when they try to label these natural behaviors as negative or something that needs to be suppressed. Their job isn't to redesign human nature—it's to deal with the extreme, antisocial stuff that actually breaks society. That's where their expertise should stay... anything else is just noise...
I guess my black-and-white outlook makes sense, considering how people over here act like extreme behavior is just the norm—like it’s some kind of reflection of what everyone is actually doing... which, honestly, isn't true at all. If we're going to talk about extremes, then I’ve got every right to use an extreme lens and a bit of a binary framework too. To wrap this up, let's face it: we all wear masks. They’re just part of life, really—a way to protect our privacy and keep ourselves from being too vulnerable around others. Suppressing your feelings has always been a survival mechanism in society, and it’s a total illusion to think that being wide open and showing vulnerability in such a dangerous world is actually going to pay off. Everyone needs to find their own way to express what they're feeling in a way that works for them, and there are plenty of ways out there once you learn how... People love watching those documentaries about peace and love in the world because it's easy to swallow, but the reality is that those things have zero basis in actual practice. The bitter truth we all live in—the one we can't escape—is that it's simply impossible to satisfy everyone's individual wants and needs...

Hmm, you know, I feel like what we're seeing is really just generational conditioning and learned expectations. If you were to take a quick look back at primitive Homo sapiens and our early ancestors, you'd probably realize there weren't these rigid, strict divisions between "male" and "female" jobs. A woman had to be just as capable at combat skills if she needed to protect her tribe, her village, or her kids when the situation called for it. On the flip side, a man had to lead by example to teach his sons to respect mothers and other women in the group, and he definitely had to develop an emotional side, otherwise, he wouldn't be able to sustain a family or find a mate. Back then, nobody was stuck in such a narrow mold of behavior; everyone had to step up and do a bit of everything depending on the need. But since things aren't like that anymore in modern America, I don't think anyone has the right to dictate what is "normal" and what isn't. At most, you could say, "Well, that’s what seems normal to me."