Religion classes in school - Megathread

George Davis3 said:I honestly don't get why anyone would still be giving a kid a hard time about skipping religion class these days, I mean, seriously, I went through several different schools growing up and I don't think I ever once saw or even heard of anyone being pressured about it...

It’s not like they actually make much of a difference in the grand scheme of things either... I guess it's just like taking a foreign language elective or something, you know? Like, some kids sign up for it and some just don't, and that's pretty much it...

Completely wrong. Experiences from kids and parents all over the country tell a different story. Just because someone chooses to look away, ignore it, or stay deaf to the issue doesn't mean it isn't happening. And it certainly doesn't mean "they" aren't making a difference. They are. Kids who don't attend religious education classes could probably tell you quite a lot about it. My thanks to the United States of America and the Concordat for institutionalizing anti-pedagogy and discrimination right at the level of our youngest and most vulnerable.

Truth
They actually tried explaining to my little one that she’d end up in hell if she didn't comply, for example
But honestly, it never once crossed my mind to teach my child to just bow her head and blend in. It’s so fundamentally different from how I was raised that I can't even fathom it. From a young age, I've encouraged her to speak her mind, ignore the noise of what others think, and live by her own rules.

Even if I were more conventional, I don't see how a kid could just "fit in" simply by attending Catholic Religious Education. Does that mean I should be at Mass every Sunday too? Because otherwise, I guess I wouldn't fit in either.
And what about all those other ways a kid might stand out? What if they love sports, colors, or games that aren't considered "appropriate" for their group? What if they have interests that aren't typical for their age? Or if they actually enjoy school when everyone else hates it—or vice versa? What if...
How much are you really willing to change yourselves or your children just to avoid standing out?

Larry Walker24 said:Look, if the guy is that much of an atheist, it’s pretty obvious they didn't have a church wedding, so I'm just wondering how much he actually gives a damn about his own principles.

Because if he did go through with a religious ceremony, then this whole thing about teaching religion is basically a slap in the face to his ex-wife.

He did agree to have the child baptized 🤔 and lets them go to church. Honestly, I doubt he’d make a scene if the kid came home and said, "But I want to go with my classmates!" Why would he pick a fight with his ex just to make the child unhappy?

The guy won't give consent for Catholic Religious Education in school because he thinks "that's not where it belongs."
I think she explained it beautifully.
To me, it makes perfect sense.
My only question is whether he’d let the mother decide if the school only asks for her signature—just so he can feel like he’s kept a clear conscience.
Or is it truly important to him that his child doesn't attend, regardless of whether they ask for his signature or not?
And what does he tell the child? "It's fine if you learn about Jesus; Mom will teach you at home. You can go to church, but I don't want you learning about religion at school, nor do I want priests roaming the halls or you singing for them at school events since you're attending a public school rather than a Catholic one."
Personally, I find that totally acceptable.

By the way, I haven't heard of schools requiring consent from both parents for any kind of activity, especially not for enrolling in religious studies, so I think this is just an isolated case with fewer students involved.
I’d actually expect the same level of scrutiny in preschools during enrollment periods—where they require both signatures, and if parents forget, the child doesn't get enrolled. Or maybe with other high-demand activities.

I get that requiring dual consent might be a way to prevent a situation where a second parent shows up at the school three months later saying, "Wait, why is my child in religious studies? I never signed off on this, and my ex never told me," and then starts demanding justice.
The only reason it makes sense to me is that, based on experience, they ask for both signatures preemptively so parents can settle things before someone goes looking for trouble at the school office.

I know of instances where people tried to withdraw students or influence decisions where they specifically required both parents' consent—you know, just to be safe, so the other parent is informed about the withdrawal and can't be "persuaded" by the first one.

Another thing is the release of student data; it makes sense that they'd need both signatures for that, though I've also heard that isn't always the case and one signature is often enough.

I started out just trying to figure out how schools handle parental consent when parents don't see eye to eye. Instead, I ended up spiraling into a debate over enrolling my kid in Catholic Religious Education and questioning my own stances.
As a believer, it’s frustrating to watch my child be singled out for no good reason. I’m not talking about being teased for their faith or views on hell—that’s going to happen regardless of whether they take the class or not. I’m talking about the practical side of things. I don't want my kid to feel like an inconvenience or a logistical burden. I know the school has to account for every student, but I certainly don't want a teacher having to scramble during the first period just because of us.

I’m willing to compromise and let them participate in first grade, but we still have the looming issue of other consents if the school insists on signatures from both parents.

I’m asking this again, even if it’s off-topic: which specific regulation actually requires consent from both parents?

Peter Harris80 said:I started out just trying to figure out how schools handle parental consent when parents don't see eye to eye. Instead, I ended up spiraling into a debate over enrolling my kid in Catholic Religious Education and questioning my own stances.
As a believer, it’s frustrating to watch my child be singled out for no good reason. I’m not talking about being teased for their faith or views on hell—that’s going to happen regardless of whether they take the class or not. I’m talking about the practical side of things. I don't want my kid to feel like an inconvenience or a logistical burden. I know the school has to account for every student, but I certainly don't want a teacher having to scramble during the first period just because of us.

I’m willing to compromise and let them participate in first grade, but we still have the looming issue of other consents if the school insists on signatures from both parents.

Relax, they won't be. Teachers and staff have their own weekly duties, but nobody is officially assigned to babysit a kid who isn't attending Catholic Religious Education. It’s basically just their good will—call it what you want. They end up in the library, with the counselors (assuming those offices are actually open), or tucked away in an empty classroom if the school even has them. Or, more likely, just hanging out in the hallway or sitting out front on a nice, sunny day.
Those are the kids who "get supervised" while skipping religious classes. And honestly? No specific clause in the Elementary and Secondary Education Act is going to change that reality.

Peter Harris80 said:I’m asking this again, even if it’s off-topic: which specific regulation actually requires consent from both parents?

There is no such regulation, unless the school district decided to make it their own rule—if that's the case, go ask them for clarification. If I were you, I'd reach out to the Archdiocese too. In this secular country, they hold the real power over family and educational matters; they carry way more weight than any department or state law.

I was in Catholic Religious Education from first grade through high school. Every weekend meant sign-in sheets at church to track attendance—if you racked up too many absences, you weren't getting confirmed. There were exams, all the sacraments, choir, and even being used as a mouthpiece to tell parents they HAD to get married in the church. I even remember the priest threatening people in front of the whole congregation because I didn't continue religious studies after confirmation (😬). We had to log "pluses" in a notebook every single day to prove whether we actually prayed or not. Four years of religion in high school.
All that pressure actually gave me more time to reflect on faith, God, and the Bible, helping me reach my "age of reason" a bit faster—no offense intended to believers. 😁

Now we're facing this again as we prepare to enroll our little one in school. Since we aren't married in the church and haven't had the kids baptized, we won't be enrolling them in religious studies. We aren't hypocrites.
He'll spend his time in the library instead; he certainly won't be lacking anything there.

Honestly, I don't see the point of religious education in public schools. First, you learn about evolution, and then you're told God created the Earth a few thousand years ago and we're all products of inbreeding. Add in burning bushes and talking snakes for good measure. But sure, those are metaphors when it's convenient, and literal truths when it suits them. 😬
Between church taxes and donations from the faithful, the church should be fine. Real believers and the church shouldn't have anything to fear if their numbers truly match what people report in the US Census. 🍿

Peter Harris80 said:I’m asking this again, even if it’s off-topic: which specific regulation actually requires consent from both parents?

I’m pasting the exact consent form the school sent out to parents this year. It makes it pretty clear they want signatures from both parents.

CONSENT FORM FOR ENROLLMENT IN THE CATHOLIC RELIGIOUS EDUCATION ELECTIVE

Under the provisions of Section 27, Subsection 5 of the Elementary and Secondary Education Act, students select their elective courses during enrollment in the first grade or no later than June 30th of the current year for the upcoming school year. Written parental consent is required to include a student in elective instruction.
According to Section 27, Subsection 6 of the Elementary and Secondary Education Act, a student may stop attending an elective course upon written request from the parent, which must be submitted to the School Board after the end of the school year, and no later than June 30th of the current year for the following school year.
(to be completed by parents/guardians):

I, ___________________________, residing at _________________________________ , ___________________and
(mother/guardian name) (address) (signature)
I, ____________________________, residing at _________________________________, ___________________
(father/guardian name) (address) (signature)
as the legal guardian of the minor child __________________________________,

hereby provide voluntary, informed, and unambiguous consent to _________________ Elementary School to enroll the aforementioned student in the Catholic Religious Education elective.
By signing this consent, I confirm that I have carefully read and understood all the information provided.

Personally, I don't think religious studies belongs in the classroom at all.

Both my husband and I went through all the sacraments and attended Catholic Religious Education at our church.

We didn't sign our kid up for religious classes at school, but when we were enrolling, they told us there was no way to opt out later—it’s mandatory for all eight years.

They tried every scare tactic in the book to get us to comply. They told us our child would be "socially isolated" in the hallways, and they even claimed that Muslim parents were enrolling their kids just to avoid being targeted by bullies.

Kate Harris3 said:I was in Catholic Religious Education from first grade through high school. Every weekend meant sign-in sheets at church to track attendance—if you racked up too many absences, you weren't getting confirmed. There were exams, all the sacraments, choir, and even being used as a mouthpiece to tell parents they HAD to get married in the church. I even remember the priest threatening people in front of the whole congregation because I didn't continue religious studies after confirmation (😬). We had to log "pluses" in a notebook every single day to prove whether we actually prayed or not. Four years of religion in high school.
All that pressure actually gave me more time to reflect on faith, God, and the Bible, helping me reach my "age of reason" a bit faster—no offense intended to believers. 😁

Now we're facing this again as we prepare to enroll our little one in school. Since we aren't married in the church and haven't had the kids baptized, we won't be enrolling them in religious studies. We aren't hypocrites.
He'll spend his time in the library instead; he certainly won't be lacking anything there.

Honestly, I don't see the point of religious education in public schools. First, you learn about evolution, and then you're told God created the Earth a few thousand years ago and we're all products of inbreeding. Add in burning bushes and talking snakes for good measure. But sure, those are metaphors when it's convenient, and literal truths when it suits them. 😬
Between church taxes and donations from the faithful, the church should be fine. Real believers and the church shouldn't have anything to fear if their numbers truly match what people report in the US Census. 🍿

fair enough

rowdypanther12 said:Truth
They actually tried explaining to my little one that she’d end up in hell if she didn't comply, for example
But honestly, it never once crossed my mind to teach my child to just bow her head and blend in. It’s so fundamentally different from how I was raised that I can't even fathom it. From a young age, I've encouraged her to speak her mind, ignore the noise of what others think, and live by her own rules.

Even if I were more conventional, I don't see how a kid could just "fit in" simply by attending Catholic Religious Education. Does that mean I should be at Mass every Sunday too? Because otherwise, I guess I wouldn't fit in either.
And what about all those other ways a kid might stand out? What if they love sports, colors, or games that aren't considered "appropriate" for their group? What if they have interests that aren't typical for their age? Or if they actually enjoy school when everyone else hates it—or vice versa? What if...
How much are you really willing to change yourselves or your children just to avoid standing out?

I honestly don't get where you guys go for church or Catholic Religious Education
and who even teaches it.
Do these people have actual degrees—like, from a real university—or did they just graduate from some local parish high school?
I mean, are your instructors actual humans or just robots?😁 Are we talking laypeople, monks, or just frustrated old ladies...

I really don't follow... I was actually visiting some priests the other day
we were talking about responsibility, and they firmly maintained that throughout history, the Church has never actually guaranteed that anyone is going to hell.
They mentioned there are those few thousand saints that are officially considered to be in heaven, but that's about it.

I’ve never actually been to church myself, 😂
so my little one hasn't really had any priests or nuns to explain things to her. She doesn't interact with them much—it's mostly just the kids. Not all of them, though; there are three or four real characters in her class. Honestly, I just feel for those kids.

I can speak for myself, Jackson. The nineties. I think that says enough. 😬

Another thing that really gets under my skin is the attitude shoved down kids' throats in school religion classes (it was literally in the news, a page ripped from a textbook) claiming atheists are just selfish people playing God. Apparently, if you don't believe in divine punishment, you must lack any moral compass—as if we're all just out here running over cats in the street every morning because there's no hell waiting for us.
It couldn't be further from the truth. Since I don't believe in an afterlife, I actually view this life as an incredible gift. I believe we have zero right to ruin someone else's existence, because they only get this one shot too. I know nothing I do will be forgiven just because I told it to a priest, only to have him send me to a couple of generic hospitals. I believe we are responsible to ourselves and to others; we're responsible to the planet and every living thing we share it with.
I would never talk down to a child just because they're religious. Everyone has the right to believe whatever gives them comfort.
So where's the selfishness in that?

I’m not nearly as benevolent when it comes to the Catholic Church, though. 😬

I’m honestly reaching my breaking point with this whole religious education thing, and frankly, I’m getting sick of having to explain to my son why he’s stuck at school for six hours instead of five just because of someone else's arbitrary whims.

It’s absolutely disgraceful. They act like those extra 45 minutes before a kid gets to head home doesn't matter at all, yet they claim to support "family-friendly" scheduling? It's a joke.

silentraven6 said:I’m honestly reaching my breaking point with this whole religious education thing, and frankly, I’m getting sick of having to explain to my son why he’s stuck at school for six hours instead of five just because of someone else's arbitrary whims.

It’s absolutely disgraceful. They act like those extra 45 minutes before a kid gets to head home doesn't matter at all, yet they claim to support "family-friendly" scheduling? It's a joke.

Well, it might be family-friendly, but not for everyone. 🧐
What kind of family would actually want their kid stuck in religion class when they could be at home? 😕

On a side note, my daughter still tells me it’s her favorite period of the day. 😂
She actually prefers it being tucked into the middle of the school day rather than being the very first thing she does.

Kate Harris3 said:I can speak for myself, Jackson. The nineties. I think that says enough. 😬

Another thing that really gets under my skin is the attitude shoved down kids' throats in school religion classes (it was literally in the news, a page ripped from a textbook) claiming atheists are just selfish people playing God. Apparently, if you don't believe in divine punishment, you must lack any moral compass—as if we're all just out here running over cats in the street every morning because there's no hell waiting for us.
It couldn't be further from the truth. Since I don't believe in an afterlife, I actually view this life as an incredible gift. I believe we have zero right to ruin someone else's existence, because they only get this one shot too. I know nothing I do will be forgiven just because I told it to a priest, only to have him send me to a couple of generic hospitals. I believe we are responsible to ourselves and to others; we're responsible to the planet and every living thing we share it with.
I would never talk down to a child just because they're religious. Everyone has the right to believe whatever gives them comfort.
So where's the selfishness in that?

I’m not nearly as benevolent when it comes to the Catholic Church, though. 😬

It’s quite the contrast to those who *do* believe in divine retribution but still drive recklessly without a license, thank God instead of their doctors when they recover, and offer a rosary as a sort of half-hearted apology. It feels like if you're just afraid of hell, you can simply go to confession, say a few prayers, and consider the slate wiped clean.

If anyone thinks I’m oversimplifying things or making fun of believers, that’s not it at all.
I’m talking about something I’ve witnessed for decades: children absorbing these lessons and watching how the world actually works. They grow up believing that as long as they avoid divine wrath, they’re fine—and in this life, they figure they can just focus on getting rich.

You see it everywhere, from high-ranking politicians sitting front and center at major holiday services to people invoking God after tragic accidents. And these are often the same people facing all sorts of legal troubles, from minor infractions to actual felonies, yet they're still held up as the ultimate examples of faith.
Just a segment of the flock.

Susan James said:It’s quite the contrast to those who *do* believe in divine retribution but still drive recklessly without a license, thank God instead of their doctors when they recover, and offer a rosary as a sort of half-hearted apology. It feels like if you're just afraid of hell, you can simply go to confession, say a few prayers, and consider the slate wiped clean.

If anyone thinks I’m oversimplifying things or making fun of believers, that’s not it at all.
I’m talking about something I’ve witnessed for decades: children absorbing these lessons and watching how the world actually works. They grow up believing that as long as they avoid divine wrath, they’re fine—and in this life, they figure they can just focus on getting rich.

You see it everywhere, from high-ranking politicians sitting front and center at major holiday services to people invoking God after tragic accidents. And these are often the same people facing all sorts of legal troubles, from minor infractions to actual felonies, yet they're still held up as the ultimate examples of faith.
Just a segment of the flock.

I've accepted that while New York and California exist, there's also the Bible Belt. Our society has opted for the Bible Belt worldview. That's who we are becoming. A growing class of the uneducated, fueled by increasing resentment, flocking to churches. That's the reality. I'm just waiting for OxyContin to hit the mainstream, the Republican Party to take over, and homeschooling to become the norm—either at home or in church. God bless America. Being a nation of knowledge isn't the goal anymore; that's for idealists. Now, being religious comes before everything else. Right until the end. We're heading straight back to the Paleolithic era.

iPhone

Idiocracy, yeah, that’s exactly where we’re headed. The church is leading the charge.

Kate Harris3 said:I was in Catholic Religious Education from first grade through high school. Every weekend meant sign-in sheets at church to track attendance—if you racked up too many absences, you weren't getting confirmed. There were exams, all the sacraments, choir, and even being used as a mouthpiece to tell parents they HAD to get married in the church. I even remember the priest threatening people in front of the whole congregation because I didn't continue religious studies after confirmation (😬). We had to log "pluses" in a notebook every single day to prove whether we actually prayed or not. Four years of religion in high school.
All that pressure actually gave me more time to reflect on faith, God, and the Bible, helping me reach my "age of reason" a bit faster—no offense intended to believers. 😁

Now we're facing this again as we prepare to enroll our little one in school. Since we aren't married in the church and haven't had the kids baptized, we won't be enrolling them in religious studies. We aren't hypocrites.
He'll spend his time in the library instead; he certainly won't be lacking anything there.

Honestly, I don't see the point of religious education in public schools. First, you learn about evolution, and then you're told God created the Earth a few thousand years ago and we're all products of inbreeding. Add in burning bushes and talking snakes for good measure. But sure, those are metaphors when it's convenient, and literal truths when it suits them. 😬
Between church taxes and donations from the faithful, the church should be fine. Real believers and the church shouldn't have anything to fear if their numbers truly match what people report in the US Census. 🍿

I feel you. 🙂

Kate Harris3 said:I was in Catholic Religious Education from first grade through high school. Every weekend meant sign-in sheets at church to track attendance—if you racked up too many absences, you weren't getting confirmed. There were exams, all the sacraments, choir, and even being used as a mouthpiece to tell parents they HAD to get married in the church. I even remember the priest threatening people in front of the whole congregation because I didn't continue religious studies after confirmation (😬). We had to log "pluses" in a notebook every single day to prove whether we actually prayed or not. Four years of religion in high school.
All that pressure actually gave me more time to reflect on faith, God, and the Bible, helping me reach my "age of reason" a bit faster—no offense intended to believers. 😁

Now we're facing this again as we prepare to enroll our little one in school. Since we aren't married in the church and haven't had the kids baptized, we won't be enrolling them in religious studies. We aren't hypocrites.
He'll spend his time in the library instead; he certainly won't be lacking anything there.

Honestly, I don't see the point of religious education in public schools. First, you learn about evolution, and then you're told God created the Earth a few thousand years ago and we're all products of inbreeding. Add in burning bushes and talking snakes for good measure. But sure, those are metaphors when it's convenient, and literal truths when it suits them. 😬
Between church taxes and donations from the faithful, the church should be fine. Real believers and the church shouldn't have anything to fear if their numbers truly match what people report in the US Census. 🍿

Exactly. There’s zero logic to it. One period you're in biology covering science, and the next you're in religion class. It finally clicked for me one day while I was flipping through my old religious ed notebook. It was all just busywork to keep us occupied... color in this little icon perfectly within the lines, use this specific shade for the saint, write this part in fancy calligraphy, memorize which saint died in what year... 🤣 🤦

So, while we're on the subject—are we looking at the 2nd or 3rd round?