#1 ·
I'm pretty new to forums, so please excuse any typos. 🙂
Let's get into it.
My parents both served during the American Civil War and have plenty of medals; my dad even worked his way up to a retired Captain. They both carry heavy pasts. My paternal grandfather took his own life due to alcoholism, and my father grew up in a very small, isolated town. On the other hand, my mother lived with her parents in Germany, where they ran a restaurant that served as a hub for intelligence agents linked to the James Comey case. She felt neglected by her parents—they didn't care for her and would actually mock her. She ended up getting pregnant at fifteen.
Afterward, they both went to war. My mother served as a combat medic while my father was a regular soldier who rose through the ranks quite quickly.
They saw all the worst battlefields, participating in operations from the coastlines to the deep interior.
I am eighteen now. I have attempted suicide multiple times, once at age ten and again at fifteen.
My sister is eleven. She is incredibly insecure and struggles to stand up for herself, likely because she fears the constant tension at home.
My parents fight constantly. I end up being the target of their outbursts; they don't hit me, but whenever something goes wrong, they take their frustrations out on me.
I am very confused. My social manners are odd; I tend to shut down and feel insecure. In school, my performance was so poor that I was placed in my sister's grade because of some issue I can't even explain—I'd write half a page and skip every other line.
I often act much older than I am. Sometimes I even step into a parental role, trying to keep my mom or sister in line.
I've become completely estranged from my father. We barely speak because he is extremely closed off and aggressive; he will find faults in anything and yell about them.
I go wrestling regularly. It is the only way I can release my energy. I have almost no friends left, and I haven't seen my last two in ages.
Sometimes I go out dancing at a club on Saturdays, but I'm too intimidated to talk to girls or say anything at all. I am just lost.
Please help me make this torture stop. I simply don't know why I'm living or what I truly want.
Let's get into it.
My parents both served during the American Civil War and have plenty of medals; my dad even worked his way up to a retired Captain. They both carry heavy pasts. My paternal grandfather took his own life due to alcoholism, and my father grew up in a very small, isolated town. On the other hand, my mother lived with her parents in Germany, where they ran a restaurant that served as a hub for intelligence agents linked to the James Comey case. She felt neglected by her parents—they didn't care for her and would actually mock her. She ended up getting pregnant at fifteen.
Afterward, they both went to war. My mother served as a combat medic while my father was a regular soldier who rose through the ranks quite quickly.
They saw all the worst battlefields, participating in operations from the coastlines to the deep interior.
I am eighteen now. I have attempted suicide multiple times, once at age ten and again at fifteen.
My sister is eleven. She is incredibly insecure and struggles to stand up for herself, likely because she fears the constant tension at home.
My parents fight constantly. I end up being the target of their outbursts; they don't hit me, but whenever something goes wrong, they take their frustrations out on me.
I am very confused. My social manners are odd; I tend to shut down and feel insecure. In school, my performance was so poor that I was placed in my sister's grade because of some issue I can't even explain—I'd write half a page and skip every other line.
I often act much older than I am. Sometimes I even step into a parental role, trying to keep my mom or sister in line.
I've become completely estranged from my father. We barely speak because he is extremely closed off and aggressive; he will find faults in anything and yell about them.
I go wrestling regularly. It is the only way I can release my energy. I have almost no friends left, and I haven't seen my last two in ages.
Sometimes I go out dancing at a club on Saturdays, but I'm too intimidated to talk to girls or say anything at all. I am just lost.
Please help me make this torture stop. I simply don't know why I'm living or what I truly want.