Dealing with smear campaigns

There are basically two main reasons why our society is circling the drain

Adults—they give up way too easily. The second they catch wind that something isn't perfect, everyone collectively throws their hands up and jumps ship. Most people don't even realize how toxic that is; they just follow the herd. I remember seeing this happen at a local grocery store once; something wasn't quite right, and suddenly everyone felt the need to make a massive scene about it. That’s how you shut doors on the very people who actually need the business

And these are the same people who claim they want to succeed in life? Yeah, I don't think so. Honestly, I’m almost glad the economy is looking grim right now; maybe it'll finally force some people to grow a conscience

Then there's the younger generation—they’d love to act entitled without putting in any actual work. If they’re stuck doing a routine job, they’re already counting down the minutes until they can head out, hop on a bike, or hit up a bar. They seem to loathe working but absolutely live for the nightlife. For them, there’s no concept of "work-life balance" where you finish a shift and then go home to rest or work on something for your own house. No, it’s always "blow all my money tonight"... and then they wonder why they end up depressed? And of course, mothers will always defend their kids no matter what, acting like everything is a tragedy. It’s ridiculous. For every one shirt they buy, they’ve probably cost their parents ten

Street culture...
I mean, it’s honestly unbelievable to me. I was at this event recently when some idiot suddenly starts laughing and pointing right at us.
I didn't say anything—I know there are plenty of losers out there who have nothing better to do with their lives.
But then one of my buddies couldn't take it. This guy was mocking us, so the third guy in our group snaps back and tells him to come deal with us instead.
Honestly, what kind of brainless hillbilly do you have to be to act like that?🙂

Then just a few days ago, I’m driving aimlessly through downtown Chicago, get a text, and decide to reply. I pull into a parking spot, and three guys walk by, laughing like they just saw something hilarious.
I’m typing away on my phone, glance in the rearview mirror, and see them staring at my car—maybe even at me.
Seriously, tell me: what is so funny about a guy texting in a parking lot?
There has to be something funny. There simply has to be.
That’s just "our culture" for you...
Oh, look! Someone parked a little crooked! Hahaha, how hysterical...

I’d bet my life all three of them live with their parents and that the car they’re walking past belongs to their old man.
Because people who actually had to fight for something in their lives don't feel the need to laugh at a guy texting in a parking lot.
I move in certain professional circles, and let me tell you, it fascinates me: anyone who decides to actually work for their bread earns my absolute respect.
But these guys? They just sit around waiting for the rain to pass, laughing like monkeys...

Not long ago, I ran into an old friend I hadn't seen in ages. He had everything handed to him on a silver platter—only child, could have been an astronaut, basically "gifted."
I couldn't even look him in the eye. I didn't know what to say, so I just gave him a cold nod.
I don't know, seeing all that belittling, that culture of playing small... I felt like telling him, "Who the hell do you think you are?"
I mean, look at yourself. You have everything, yet here you are, sitting in your father's car, nearly thirty years old.
Part of me really wanted to say it, but I held myself back....

the American psyche

1. Road rage

Someone’s speeding, and whether they're actually at fault or just driving fast... people lose it immediately. It's all "get off the road" and death threats before you can even blink.

2. Relationship drama

People just can't help themselves. They see someone struggling with a breakup and practically trip over themselves to swoop in.

3. Messing with friends

Everything starts out great, then everything goes south fast.

It's the same old story... just a bunch of people with zero life experience and way too much misplaced energy.

Look, it’s a matter of culture, sure, but it’s also about how people are raised.
From what I’ve observed in this country, kids are basically raised to think they’re somehow superior to everyone else.
Nobody ever teaches them to keep their feet planted firmly on the ground.
Then, eventually, the illusion starts to crack, and they try to keep that lie alive by belittling anyone who doesn't fit their mold.
I don't know why someone would bother putting others down—maybe to make themselves feel better, or to make the present reality easier to stomach.
But I don't do that. Not because I'm some saint, mind you, but because I’m such a jerk that I simply couldn't care less about anyone else.
I’ve traveled around the States, and more often than not, people target me because I come from a small town and have a bit of an accent. One time, after having a few drinks with my buddies, I completely forgot to switch over to "Standard American."
I didn't take it personally, though. In fact, I just turned the whole thing into a joke, and that was that.
For instance, I was out in the Midwest once, and this guy started mocking my regional drawl. I just started cracking up, literally rolling on the floor laughing...
Everyone stared at me, so I had to explain myself. I told them it was just my version of a "city accent"—it's basically like a Russian trying to speak English with a thick accent and making a total fool of himself in the process.
After that, nobody dared touch my accent again.
Once they see that their attempts to diminish you actually just entertain you, they stop.

I remember this one time at a club; we knew this girl by sight, but we weren't "high status" enough to be there. She walked straight up to me and my crew and just started pointing fingers aggressively, going, "You, you, and you," basically telling us she didn't want to see our faces in there anymore.
I just burst out laughing like a maniac and asked her, "Honey, are you actually sane?"
I never saw her again. She made this ridiculous face and vanished instantly.

Maybe people treat belittling others like it's some kind of intellectual game.

I’ve come to realize that most of the people doing the belittling are just deeply frustrated individuals who aren't particularly happy with their own lives. Oh, believe me—I know exactly the type 😉
they’ve actually tried to ruin things for me, mostly just so they can feel a little more significant or superior in their own minds. In my experience, the best move was simply to distance myself and ignore them entirely; they remain stuck in that cycle of frustration and dissatisfaction—perhaps even totally oblivious to how they're acting—while I walk away with a bit more wisdom and the quiet satisfaction of knowing I’m a better person because of it

If I could offer any advice, it would be this: don't give these types any emotional reaction whatsoever. Stand your ground against them (they absolutely loathe that) or perhaps nudge them along, but never, ever be the one to initiate the conflict. Though, honestly, the smartest thing is probably just not to waste your energy on them at all and just walk away

Sam Hayes said:I’ve come to realize that most of the people doing the belittling are just deeply frustrated individuals who aren't particularly happy with their own lives. Oh, believe me—I know exactly the type 😉
they’ve actually tried to ruin things for me, mostly just so they can feel a little more significant or superior in their own minds. In my experience, the best move was simply to distance myself and ignore them entirely; they remain stuck in that cycle of frustration and dissatisfaction—perhaps even totally oblivious to how they're acting—while I walk away with a bit more wisdom and the quiet satisfaction of knowing I’m a better person because of it

If I could offer any advice, it would be this: don't give these types any emotional reaction whatsoever. Stand your ground against them (they absolutely loathe that) or perhaps nudge them along, but never, ever be the one to initiate the conflict. Though, honestly, the smartest thing is probably just not to waste your energy on them at all and just walk away

The absolute peak of personal growth is when you can look at someone like that with nothing but indifference and a bit of pity while they're foaming at the mouth, yelling, or throwing whatever tantrum they feel like...
It's that moment when you finally just shrug your shoulders and realize their nonsense doesn't touch you because you have much more important, much happier things to occupy your mind.

Look, I’ve got a real situation here. My folks are totally rejecting my new guy just because he’s from a different background and follows a different religion. Now they’re basically giving me an ultimatum: pick one of those old guys they approve of, or stay with him. What would a smart person actually do in my shoes? Let me know.😕

Brenda Booth5 said:The absolute peak of personal growth is when you can look at someone like that with nothing but indifference and a bit of pity while they're foaming at the mouth, yelling, or throwing whatever tantrum they feel like...
It's that moment when you finally just shrug your shoulders and realize their nonsense doesn't touch you because you have much more important, much happier things to occupy your mind.

I suppose some aggressors push so hard that you feel the need to hit back just as hard, but I think what you described is probably the superior way to handle it. 🙂

Sam Hayes said:I suppose some aggressors push so hard that you feel the need to hit back just as hard, but I think what you described is probably the superior way to handle it. 🙂

Yes, I agree, sometimes meeting force with force actually does get results.

Brenda Booth5 said:Yes, I agree, sometimes meeting force with force actually does get results.

...especially if you’re generally the type who stays quiet and keeps to themselves. When someone like that finally reaches their breaking point, everyone usually just shuts up—though, of course, they probably spent all that time before then pushing every single button they could find. That phrase, "you can try all you want, but you won't get anywhere," really hits home, doesn't it?🙂

Honestly, being the target of constant belittling or any kind of bullying is such an awful experience to go through. I truly hope anyone finding themselves in that kind of situation can find a way out as quickly as possible—whatever that looks like for them. At the end of the day, nothing is more important than your well-being, especially your mental health.

Sam Hayes said:...especially if you’re generally the type who stays quiet and keeps to themselves. When someone like that finally reaches their breaking point, everyone usually just shuts up—though, of course, they probably spent all that time before then pushing every single button they could find. That phrase, "you can try all you want, but you won't get anywhere," really hits home, doesn't it?🙂

Honestly, being the target of constant belittling or any kind of bullying is such an awful experience to go through. I truly hope anyone finding themselves in that kind of situation can find a way out as quickly as possible—whatever that looks like for them. At the end of the day, nothing is more important than your well-being, especially your mental health.

This immediately brought to mind that old joke about a young Mexican—not being malicious at all, I promise; I only ever tell those kinds of jokes as situational examples rather than anything personal.

So, for those who don't know: this kid didn't say a single word until he was about ten years old. Then, during dinner one night, he asked for the salt. When his family started grilling him with questions, he simply replied, "Well, I haven't had any complaints until now."

That’s pretty much how it works with "quiet" people...

I'm with Gizel on this one

I live with someone just like that... constant belittling, straight-up lying... and they haven't actually accomplished a single thing in their life.

Bryan Edwards83 said:Why do people feel this need to be so mean to one another? Like, why the constant urge to belittle others or hide behind all that irony and sarcasm?

Is it just some kind of defense mechanism, I guess? Or do you think it’s just how people are wired, or maybe it's caused by something else entirely?

I suppose my perspective tends to run afoul of the forum rules—I seem to pick up a warning every time I attempt to weigh in on these sorts of inquiries—so I will try to frame this differently. Perhaps, given enough time and experience (unfortunate experiences included), one might begin to recognize irony and sarcasm as mere stylistic choices rather than inherently malicious traits used by "bad people."👍

Then again, there are those who refuse to believe "bad people" exist at all; they cling to the idea that humans are fundamentally good, and that circumstances merely nudge them toward certain actions, whether righteous or otherwise.☕

Is that some kind of defense mechanism, perhaps?

If you ask them, you'll likely just be adding fuel to the fire, though I suppose there is no substitute for learning the hard way.😵 There isn't a painless route to facing harsh truths or life's realities; one simply has to be brave. I sometimes think about how much harder it must have been for people in the past, when even appearing to think for oneself was forbidden, let alone voicing an opinion publicly. And here I am, fretting over potential warnings or bans... I feel somewhat pathetic realizing that.😢 I suppose I shall have to spend tonight working on myself again.🕺🙂

And do you believe this is normal human behavior, or is it the result of something else?

Your concept of "normal" feels a bit like a dogma to me. It might be easier if you discarded that term altogether and simply accepted reality. Facts. I would suggest looking toward science—specifically philosophy, psychology, or literature—as reliable systems of understanding; they aren't just arts to be ignored.😉

As for the first part of your question:

Humanitarian vs. The Heartless Mayor Who Isn't Really


I hope you grasp the underlying point regarding "liberation" from the "majority," which applies to many elements of your inquiry, including your use of the word "normal."👍

Sam Hayes said:...especially if you’re generally the type who stays quiet and keeps to themselves. When someone like that finally reaches their breaking point, everyone usually just shuts up—though, of course, they probably spent all that time before then pushing every single button they could find. That phrase, "you can try all you want, but you won't get anywhere," really hits home, doesn't it?🙂

Honestly, being the target of constant belittling or any kind of bullying is such an awful experience to go through. I truly hope anyone finding themselves in that kind of situation can find a way out as quickly as possible—whatever that looks like for them. At the end of the day, nothing is more important than your well-being, especially your mental health.

I agree. It seems if you happen to be calm and reserved, people label you as mute, a freak, or less valuable. They assume you can't defend yourself and that you're an easy target.
Never let anyone walk over you; if you don't value yourself, no one else will. A person's worth is found in their actions, not in constant chatter or projecting their own complexes onto someone they perceive as weak.

Arthur Young4 said:I agree. It seems if you happen to be calm and reserved, people label you as mute, a freak, or less valuable. They assume you can't defend yourself and that you're an easy target.
Never let anyone walk over you; if you don't value yourself, no one else will. A person's worth is found in their actions, not in constant chatter or projecting their own complexes onto someone they perceive as weak.

I suspect it might be equally important to direct our "attention" toward those who do the trampling, rather than scrutinizing the actions of those who simply endure it... just because they happen to be enduring it.

I mean... I don't know... I've been through enough life-and-death situations to realize I should probably listen more, I guess.



I want to emphasize the absolute necessity of having social morals and clear criteria to condemn bullying and disrespect, rather than relying on the usual conformist reactions and idle commentary we see all the time.

In reality, victims aren't at fault for being victims. Period.☕

Practically speaking, if I were to punch you in the shoulder, what would you actually do? You got hit. The blow landed. You feel the consequences. What's your move?😉