Why does everyone treat high schoolers differently?

Most high schoolers are actually decent kids—smart, driven, and raised with solid values. But then you have that certain minority. You know the type: they got in through connections or came from those sketchy middle schools where teachers hand out A's like candy. And wouldn't you know it? They struggle the entire time. In my class, half of those "legacy" kids washed out by sophomore or junior year. As for the ones who actually managed to stick around, they usually just scraped by with maybe two or three failed tests under their belts.
The other kids admitted with questionable credentials were a bit more self-aware. They’d pick up one failed exam here or there, or maybe two, but some really went out of their way to coast through with nothing better than a C.
That’s the small group I’m talking about—mostly the kids of arrogant, overachieving parents who end up ruining the reputation of the whole school. Without them, I think high school would actually deserve the kind of respect the original poster is hinting at (look, high schoolers aren't perfect, but the idea of polite, well-educated young people holds water).
We also had a specific mess in my class because one student's mother was a super influential teacher at the school. She basically tailored the classroom dynamic to suit her kid, which eventually turned into total chaos. For nearly four years, our class held the undignified title of being the worst in the entire school. Between the kids who shouldn't have been there and the weird power dynamics, the intellectual atmosphere was basically non-existent. It felt less like an honors track and more like some mediocre night school.

Kimberly Smith6 said:That’s just what I’ve seen at my college, so it feels a bit strange to hear you claim that prep school kids are somehow ahead of those who spent four years in specialized vocational training. And, if I'm being honest, I actually had to personally pull some of them through their coursework because I felt bad watching them fail; they aren't exactly to blame for the fact that our education system essentially stretched middle school into an extra four years filled with subjects that have absolutely nothing to do with a real profession. But, according to your logic, I suppose all these prep school students were just born geniuses, attending classes solely to collect a diploma. 🤣

If everyone in the class had achieved a 4.0, they wouldn't bother handing out certificates or flower bouquets, because then it would just be taken for granted.
Besides, doing that would be considered discrimination against the other students whose averages fall below a 4.9, since there isn't an official competition designed to reward one group of students over another. ☕

Honestly, I'm a little disappointed by your somewhat convoluted and rushed way of thinking when you suggest that everyone had perfectly equal circumstances to achieve a 4.0 and that anyone who failed to reach it is solely responsible for their own failure. It leaves me with the impression that you might not know much about how the real world works and that you're viewing everything solely through your own lens. 🙄

Thank God for common sense!

Kimberly Smith6 said:That’s just what I’ve seen at my college, so it feels a bit strange to hear you claim that prep school kids are somehow ahead of those who spent four years in specialized vocational training. And, if I'm being honest, I actually had to personally pull some of them through their coursework because I felt bad watching them fail; they aren't exactly to blame for the fact that our education system essentially stretched middle school into an extra four years filled with subjects that have absolutely nothing to do with a real profession. But, according to your logic, I suppose all these prep school students were just born geniuses, attending classes solely to collect a diploma. 🤣

If everyone in the class had achieved a 4.0, they wouldn't bother handing out certificates or flower bouquets, because then it would just be taken for granted.
Besides, doing that would be considered discrimination against the other students whose averages fall below a 4.9, since there isn't an official competition designed to reward one group of students over another. ☕

Honestly, I'm a little disappointed by your somewhat convoluted and rushed way of thinking when you suggest that everyone had perfectly equal circumstances to achieve a 4.0 and that anyone who failed to reach it is solely responsible for their own failure. It leaves me with the impression that you might not know much about how the real world works and that you're viewing everything solely through your own lens. 🙄

So what, you think we shouldn't reward or encourage kids who actually grind and finish high school with a perfect 4.0?
I guess we should hand out trophies to the kids pulling a 2.0 too!🙄

coastalhound58 said:Personally, I don't judge, nor do I ever place myself in a subordinate position!
Don't generalize like that! Your two little anecdotes aren't exactly a sufficient sample size to draw such a broad conclusion.
For instance, I don't treat someone any differently just because they have a degree from an Ivy League school versus someone who doesn't.
One really needs to actually get to know a person before forming a judgment, and what you're describing here is, at the very least...😂
...neither a choice of high school nor a college degree tells you absolutely anything about a person's actual intellect.

This topic seems more suited for teenagers! I suspect it doesn't really belong here.

I'm signing onto that bolded part. 👍
People graduate from trade schools and then go on to finish college; others stop after trade school and you can clearly see they're sharp, based on how they think and what they care about.
Usually, whether a kid goes to a prep school or a major university isn't even their call, it's their parents'... and honestly, there are plenty of mediocre people in prep schools and universities alike; statistically maybe fewer than in trade schools, but that really depends on which school we're talking about (an auto tech school isn't the same as a liberal arts college, and an economics program isn't the same as a philosophy department, obviously)... once you look past the cold statistics, it just comes down to your own personal vibe when you're talking face-to-face. 😉

Daniel Moore3 said:Thank God for common sense!

So what, you think we shouldn't reward or encourage kids who actually grind and finish high school with a perfect 4.0?
I guess we should hand out trophies to the kids pulling a 2.0 too!🙄

The whole point of grades is just to light a fire under people so they actually study... it's not some freaking academic Olympics. 🤣
I know plenty of kids who were straight-A students in elementary school only to end up working as flight attendants, or guys who barely scraped by with Cs but went into mechanical engineering and are pulling in huge salaries now.
Then you see all those honor roll types from college who wind up as high school teachers or secretaries—honestly, why even bother with the degree?—while the ones who just did "okay" go on to get their PhDs and become professors... 😍

Why does everyone obsess over being "intellectually superior"? It feels like the whole conversation just turns into an ego trip about who's smarter, who's more academic, or who studies harder.

Personally, I have way more respect for people who might not be geniuses but actually put in the work to build a good life. It beats those self-proclaimed intellectuals who just talk just to hear themselves speak...

electricdriver33 said:The whole point of grades is just to light a fire under people so they actually study... it's not some freaking academic Olympics. 🤣
I know plenty of kids who were straight-A students in elementary school only to end up working as flight attendants, or guys who barely scraped by with Cs but went into mechanical engineering and are pulling in huge salaries now.
Then you see all those honor roll types from college who wind up as high school teachers or secretaries—honestly, why even bother with the degree?—while the ones who just did "okay" go on to get their PhDs and become professors... 😍

Look, it’s obviously not the Olympics or anything, but hey, it’s nice to know you actually walk away with a book if you manage to pull off a perfect 4.0.
Look, any kind of extra nudge is a win in my book. Even if it’s just symbolic, like what we're seeing here. Honestly, at this point, I'll take whatever help I can get.

electricdriver33 said:The whole point of grades is just to light a fire under people so they actually study... it's not some freaking academic Olympics. 🤣
I know plenty of kids who were straight-A students in elementary school only to end up working as flight attendants, or guys who barely scraped by with Cs but went into mechanical engineering and are pulling in huge salaries now.
Then you see all those honor roll types from college who wind up as high school teachers or secretaries—honestly, why even bother with the degree?—while the ones who just did "okay" go on to get their PhDs and become professors... 😍

Do you honestly think those examples of yours actually mean anything? Seriously? 🤣
Honestly, you’re better off just scraping by with Cs. If you try too hard and aim for that perfect 4.0 GPA, don't be surprised when you end up stuck behind a desk doing secretarial work for the rest of your life. Why kill yourself over a degree just to land a dead-end job? It's a scam. 🙄

Daniel Moore3 said:Look, it’s obviously not the Olympics or anything, but hey, it’s nice to know you actually walk away with a book if you manage to pull off a perfect 4.0.
Look, any kind of extra nudge is a win in my book. Even if it’s just symbolic, like what we're seeing here. Honestly, at this point, I'll take whatever help I can get.

Do you honestly think those examples of yours actually mean anything? Seriously? 🤣
Honestly, you’re better off just scraping by with Cs. If you try too hard and aim for that perfect 4.0 GPA, don't be surprised when you end up stuck behind a desk doing secretarial work for the rest of your life. Why kill yourself over a degree just to land a dead-end job? It's a scam. 🙄

I was just saying the world isn't black and white, which would be way easier if it actually was... People get A's, B's, or C's for all sorts of reasons. Someone might pull a 4.0 because they're a total grind, and if they want to be a secretary, then great, they're happy, it's not some tragedy... But an intellectual or someone who's actually gifted? They aren't usually looking for a job where all you need is a high school diploma and a connection...☕
Some people failed classes because they couldn't tell what actually mattered from what didn't, not because they were dumb or lazy, and some of them still became university professors... Others got Cs but knew how to think outside the box—like in a philosophy seminar, for example—and their professors saw that and cleared them for grad school...
You can have a perfect GPA, but once you sit down for a real interview, you find out if they're just a robot who knows how to hit "enter" or someone who actually knows how to think for themselves...😉
And then there's the whole thing where people chase grades just to fix an inferiority complex, though that's not always the case... For some, it's the only place they feel successful. Apparently Einstein was bad at math, and Thomas Aquinas was called a "dumb ox" by his classmates, and all that... A grade isn't some holy decree that decides your entire future...🙂

Daniel Moore3 said:Look, it’s obviously not the Olympics or anything, but hey, it’s nice to know you actually walk away with a book if you manage to pull off a perfect 4.0.
Look, any kind of extra nudge is a win in my book. Even if it’s just symbolic, like what we're seeing here. Honestly, at this point, I'll take whatever help I can get.

Do you honestly think those examples of yours actually mean anything? Seriously? 🤣
Honestly, you’re better off just scraping by with Cs. If you try too hard and aim for that perfect 4.0 GPA, don't be surprised when you end up stuck behind a desk doing secretarial work for the rest of your life. Why kill yourself over a degree just to land a dead-end job? It's a scam. 🙄

Those aren't made-up scenarios, they're real life... I used to think being an overachiever meant everyone would go on to get PhDs and run the world, but reality had other plans... You see people finish high school vocational programs, head straight to a state university, and just get the degree... usually in something far from finance or business...😛

Finished high school, but I never really clicked with that crowd... especially when it came to the girls, man... why am I even thinking about them now? 🙄
High school is just full of weirdos. I always found better people at other schools—people who actually felt more natural and down-to-earth

slybison45 said:Finished high school, but I never really clicked with that crowd... especially when it came to the girls, man... why am I even thinking about them now? 🙄
High school is just full of weirdos. I always found better people at other schools—people who actually felt more natural and down-to-earth

I would’ve bailed in a heartbeat if I’d run into anyone from my old trade school crew!

I swear, I know so many people who finished high school but are honestly just as clueless as a square wheel, I guess.

Bryan Jackson98 said:I’m not sure if this has been covered yet, but I’ve been wondering about this tendency people have to voluntarily subordinate themselves—essentially placing themselves in a lower tier because they assume someone else is more intelligent. It’s like they stop trying to hold onto their own convictions or become too terrified to push back. I have two specific scenarios playing out in my life. The first involves older generations; for context, I’m just hitting my late teens. They look at me differently the moment I mention I'm heading to an elite prep school, instantly labeling me as some kind of intellectual prodigy who exists on a plane above my peers.
Then there’s the second scenario: when I tell someone my age that I’ll be attending a top-tier academy, they seem to regress, acting even more foolish than before, which I find fascinating. In those moments, once they’ve convinced themselves that they sit at a lower intellectual level than I do, I could practically lead them anywhere; I could convince them that nine is actually less than seven—a banal example, obviously, but that’s the point. I could spout absolute nonsense, and they would nod along, refusing to even take a second to verify the truth. I’m curious about the root cause here. Is it driven by some deep-seated prejudice regarding prep school students and the prestige attached to them? I’m not saying I dislike having this advantage, but I’d love to understand the psychological mechanics behind why people surrender their agency like this.

It’s the exact same phenomenon with doctors, professors, and plenty of other professionals. It’s essentially the standard social reaction to someone who is "supposed" to be the authority figure.

You’ve all drifted completely off course here, and it isn't really about who's the smartest person in the room; just go back and give the original post another read.

hiddenhawk3 said:Yeah, sure. That high schooler who's just memorizing stuff to get an A 😍or whatever else to look good is pretty shallow and doesn't actually know anything. 😍

Nobody said he was clueless. They aren't even learning the same stuff. Look, I went through high school, so I know how this works. The only subject that actually takes any real effort is History. I don't get how some people had the patience to go over the same thing five times; I read it once and moved on, good luck to them. But the kids in my class? Honestly, I've never seen a more brainless group, and I'm not saying I'm some genius or anything. During freshman year, about ten people failed out. There were only 22 of us left after everyone else dropped. And get this—the whole class would practically follow one specific kid around like he was some kind of leader, which makes zero sense. His parents were big-shot politicians, sitting right there in the front row. It was a total circus of people sucking up to him or the teachers sucking up to him. Then the doctor's son joins in. Half the class was kids with influential parents—total idiots. The other half were straight-A nerds. Those were the ones who cruised through. Then you had the solid B students who didn't care about studying, just wanted to pass. Maybe one or two people could barely scrape by with an A. When those parents pay for college, I’m not worried about their kids. High school isn't some big deal. Other schools aren't special either. This whole argument is stupid. I went to an engineering college, fell in love, spent all day hanging with my crew, passed everything on schedule, and had a blast. Passing college depends on the individual—it's about drive and hard work. It doesn't matter what your diploma says if you actually know how to survive in the real world.😉

Kimberly Smith6 said:Why is there such a massive bias toward kids from prep schools?
Well, it’s simply because you can't just wander into a high-end preparatory academy; you need an GPA hovering somewhere between a 4.5 and a perfect 5.0!
And of course, almost every teacher in our elementary schools graduated from those same elite academies and went on to prestigious universities, which leads to this constant, repetitive conditioning where they tell the children that a kid with a 5.0 is some kind of genius. Meanwhile, if a student falls even slightly below that 4.5 mark, they are practically invisible, receiving absolutely zero recognition or praise. It reminds me of how most famous authors came from that same academic track—and we all know the unspoken social hierarchy regarding writers who merely read the classics for a grade versus those who actually live them!

At least in my old elementary school, things worked exactly like that; any student who managed to finish with a 5.0 would be called up in front of the whole class to receive a formal certificate, along with flowers and various little gifts. To me, it felt like pure brainwashing for the rest of the students who didn't hit that 5.0 mark, essentially drilling into their heads that only the "perfect" student is smart. It sends this heavy, indirect message to everyone else that they are somehow dim-witted just because they didn't get a fancy piece of paper or a public shout-out!

Now, look at my own situation—I graduated from a vocational high school and I am currently attending a technical university, and let me tell you, seeing those prep school graduates walk into a technical college lab is quite the sight to behold.
Those prep school kids stare at the lab equipment like newborn calves staring at a colorful gate, and they almost always try to sit next to the students who came from vocational backgrounds just to ride their coattails and scrape by with a passing grade.
Because when they see an oscilloscope, a multimeter, or a voltmeter for the first time—not to mention resistors, chips, or capacitors—they honestly just stand there asking, "Wait, what is this? What does this thing do?"
They have a thousand questions about how to connect a single wire, whereas the students who spent four years in vocational training just look at them and say, "How do you not know this? It's this, it's that," and then they assemble the entire circuit perfectly in a minute because they've been practicing the exact same material consistently for four straight years.
In contrast, a prep school student is expected to cram that entire four-year vocational curriculum into a single semester lasting maybe three or four months!
So, I really want someone to explain to me how a student from that background can possibly be a high-quality professional when they've only touched the material for a few months—and that's not even counting the time they spend cramming for exams. How can they compete with someone who has been absorbing and repeating that knowledge steadily over a four-year period?

It ultimately results in a situation where even the lowest-performing student from a vocational school ends up being far more capable than a prep school graduate when it comes to actual, practical expertise.

You've got a point. You're basically saying a prep school kid has to cram three years of vocational training into three months at college.😍

Prep schools are pretty useless, I suppose.