Elementary school teachers

James Perez54 said:It's simple: there just aren't enough qualified or competent professionals working with kids.

They won't realize it until they purge the dead weight from their own ranks, but most of them just act like cowards and pretend it isn't their problem...

It seems you have a bit of a grudge against professors in general. Or am I just being overly critical of every single profession I come across?

As for that final remark—suggesting they should just shut up like cowards while pretending none of this affects them—I might actually agree if we were talking about certain professors at state universities who lack even a shred of competence. In those cases, they probably shouldn't be anywhere near students because they simply aren't qualified for the job. However, I would never dream of applying that logic to this teacher, nor to the vast majority of educators working in our local elementary and high schools.

James Perez54 said:Regarding grades, I am talking about actual, non-fictional student knowledge (measured by As) and you are intentionally twisting my words.

Who is to blame for the inflation of As and honors? Are parents writing the grades in the report cards? Are they threatening teachers at gunpoint?
You tell me, what's really going on here? 😁

I don't know anyone who pays for tutoring to get an A (sic!), let alone to fix an F.

By the way, I have never encountered such a massive collection of hypocrites, emotional wrecks, insecure people, and frauds (exceptions exist, obviously) as I have within the education system.
Why is that?
Back in my day (I'm 43), anyone who couldn't get into their preferred college (lower-performing students) or couldn't find a high-paying job in their field (unrelated) would regularly end up working in a school, taking out their frustrations on children.
I highly doubt things have improved since then.

After reading this, I've decided I'm done arguing with you. I truly hope you can work through whatever personal baggage you're carrying, because this kind of bitter, pure hatred toward a profession isn't objective... it's clearly personal.
I genuinely wish you the best.

James Perez54 said:It's simple: there just aren't enough qualified or competent professionals working with kids.

They won't realize it until they purge the dead weight from their own ranks, but most of them just act like cowards and pretend it isn't their problem...

Help me out here—could you walk me through what actually makes a teacher "expert" or "competent"? Beyond just having the right degree and the right license, what are we really talking about?

James Perez54 said:If she felt that bad about it, she could have just treated that one single child at her own expense, rather than lining the parents' pockets and, even worse, putting the little one in such an awkward position.
And if the parents insist on returning the money, fine; if not, also fine.

This is a textbook example of someone being rigid and lacking spontaneity, and people like that shouldn't be working in education.

Honestly, people like that wouldn't even make good parents, yet here we are.🤷

driftingbear10 said:Laura74, did the little guy get some popcorn when he went to the movies? 🍿

No way. First off, you don't eat in a movie theater—it's just not how it works.

And that question of yours? It’s pretty damn provocative, isn't it?

And for all those people who keep insisting that he "borrowed" it—or that she "lent" it to him—let me stop you right there: that’s just plain wrong. He didn't ask for it, and I certainly didn't go asking her to lend it to him. She just handed it over because she didn't want to be the only one sitting there without anything to eat. Fine, whatever... but let's play this out—if I hadn't signed him up for that summer camp in the woods, would she have "lent" him that, too?

The whole thing boils down to her deciding—all on her own, mind you—that she was going to lend something out. Nobody actually asked her to do that. Look, I’m glad she stepped up and was generous, really, I am, but I feel like I've said this a hundred times already: she could have just made it simple. She could have just sent her mom to the school to handle it, but no—instead, she tells him to tell me, and then somehow it turns into me having to send the money through him! It's just unnecessary drama.

@James Perez54, I honestly can’t begin to fathom what kind of friction you have with educators, but my own experience was quite different... I was fortunate enough to have such incredible professors—and even a teacher <3—throughout my schooling who approached their work with genuine care, attention, and immense professionalism. They left such a lasting impression on me that, even now, I feel a certain melancholy knowing I won't see them again or get to tell them just how much they inspired me. Given that context, all I can say in response to comments like yours is this:
👎To the power of two.

@Kimberly Robinson2, I think it might be time to teach the child that borrowing money from others isn't the way to go. I remember back when I was growing up, there were times my parents would scrounge together every spare cent around the house just to afford bread, so the idea of borrowing money never even crossed my mind. He's old enough to grasp these realities. If he was truly that hungry for something at McDonald's, $7.50 for a burger should have been plenty, rather than $7.00, especially if he understands his mother isn't working and things are tight. A five-year-old shouldn't be navigating these things...

Kimberly Robinson2 said:No way. First off, you don't eat in a movie theater—it's just not how it works.

And that question of yours? It’s pretty damn provocative, isn't it?

And for all those people who keep insisting that he "borrowed" it—or that she "lent" it to him—let me stop you right there: that’s just plain wrong. He didn't ask for it, and I certainly didn't go asking her to lend it to him. She just handed it over because she didn't want to be the only one sitting there without anything to eat. Fine, whatever... but let's play this out—if I hadn't signed him up for that summer camp in the woods, would she have "lent" him that, too?

The whole thing boils down to her deciding—all on her own, mind you—that she was going to lend something out. Nobody actually asked her to do that. Look, I’m glad she stepped up and was generous, really, I am, but I feel like I've said this a hundred times already: she could have just made it simple. She could have just sent her mom to the school to handle it, but no—instead, she tells him to tell me, and then somehow it turns into me having to send the money through him! It's just unnecessary drama.

You honestly can't really wrap your head around it until you actually hear her talk.🙂Maybe the little guy's just a bit too shy to come clean about it.

I wasn't judging at all—honestly, your voice is the first one I've heard to suggest people don't snack in theaters ☕ I haven't been in forever, but in my head, it's always just movie snacks, popcorn, peanuts... 🤔
And since people *definitely* snack in theaters—and your little guy was just there recently—I was curious about how you usually handle outings like that with the school...

Kimberly Robinson2 said:The kid went and handed his cash back to the teacher. Since he’s got a massive mouth—he talks until he's blue in the face 😁—he doesn't even realize what he actually said, but somehow he managed to land himself an in-person meeting with her this Monday....🤣

So, until then, I'm flying blind.

As for those field trips, movies, theater stuff—yeah, they know how to write an essay. When they were out in Smalltown, USA, they had to write about bread making, but honestly, what they saw there! 😲 And of course, he wrote it all wrong, because I didn't see what they saw, and since I helped him a little with the writing, it wasn't exactly perfect....

They also had one day where they just sat there watching some cartoon movie, whatever. The assignment was to retell the story. But since he couldn't care less about cartoons, he didn't remember anything and didn't write the damn thing. All that was left in his notebook was the title. And then came the reprimand from her about missing homework. So, I wrote her a little note on a piece of paper explaining that he didn't remember what he watched. She shot back at me, asking how that was possible, saying he was supposed to write about a happy family. At which point I wrote: First off, he doesn't have a family, and secondly, we aren't exactly "happy" during a crisis like this—not that we're complaining, we aren't starving, thank God, but still. Going through the motions of describing some made-up nonsense about blah blah happiness and big families... I just don't see the point of that topic.

Naturally, I got called in for a talk...😂

And sure enough, I told her all of that right to her face—that my kid can't describe something (he was supposed to compare the cartoon to his home life) because we aren't all living in some rosy wonderland when reality is clearly different! Besides, he's too young to have such a wild imagination that he'd just invent things that don't exist.

It really gets to me, how they patronize them! They try to shield them from the reality of this world, acting like everything is perfect. Sure, there are beautiful things, but there's plenty of ugly stuff too. Not long ago, the neighbors' gorgeous cat passed away. My boy was outside and came running in terrified, yelling that something happened at the neighbor's house. I ran outside and heard these horrific screams coming from the hallway....😲 It was gut-wrenching. I know two girls (14 and 17) live in the apartment above ours with their parents, and now I can't stop wondering what might have happened to them. The screaming wouldn't stop—just: Noooooooo, nooooooo, I can't do thiiiiiiis, nooooooooooooooo... my blood turned to ice for those few seconds while I stood there by the door. I rang the bell. Nothing. Rang it again. The younger girl comes to the door and I ask if something happened, if they need help. She just says, our cat died....😲 And then the dad shows up, grabs the girl by the shoulder (they're decent people normally), and I tell him I'm sorry, but I ran out because I heard the screaming and wanted to help if I could. You know what he tells me? That it's none of my business!! 😲 Then he slams the door in my face.

Makes me wonder: next time I hear screaming, am I going to jump in?
Will anyone else jump in? (the neighbors heard it too)
Will my own child jump in and call for help?
And what if next time things are much worse and nobody reacts at all?

And here's the kicker: it was the 17-year-old girl screaming. Look, I get it, losing a pet is awful. I understand. But clearly, she's been raised under a glass dome where the world is just sunshine and rainbows. Totally isolated from real situations. What happens when actual tragedy hits one of them? Will they just break? Because they won't know how to handle reality.

That's why the school system irritates me so much... everything is colorful, smiling, wonderful, and fair, while everything else is hidden behind the curtain. They protect kids from things, and it isn't doing them any favors. I show my kids the real stuff—news clips of disasters, funerals, floods, wildfires..... because that's what's actually happening around us!

Sure, go ahead and let a ten-year-old watch some snuff film just so they can "understand" how cruel and horrific the world is. I guess that makes sense. 🙄

You're overreacting. Your first post actually made sense and I got where you were coming from, but as this thread goes on, you’re starting to sound like a total drama queen. Honestly, sending a letter to the teacher just to complain about how miserable you all are—and how your kids won't write an essay about a "happy family"—is a bit much. Writing essays serves a real educational purpose; it teaches kids penmanship, how to structure their thoughts, and basic grammar. It’s probably easier to teach them those skills through something they actually enjoy, like a cartoon they just watched. I guess you're just turning something totally harmless and standard into this huge ordeal to show everyone how much you're struggling.

Give me a break. I think it’s fine to teach kids that the world isn't just sunshine and rainbows—it isn't. But there's a difference between being realistic and shoving your own misery down their throats. Telling a kid how gross and awful everything is, or complaining about having no family or how unhappy you are during a crisis... I don't know, it just seems a bit much. Instead of all that negativity, maybe you could have helped them write an essay about a happy family by focusing on the good things that actually make your family special (and I'm sure you have some).

Facing a kid with the harsh realities of life is necessary, I guess, but it’s brutal. You have to be careful; maybe we should hold back on our own tendency to vent just so we can raise someone who actually enters the world feeling optimistic and happy.

To the ladies on this thread claiming that teaching just boils down to sipping coffee in the lounge and taking field trips—honestly, that’s total nonsense. I highly doubt any of them have ever tried taking twenty kids to a museum, a movie theater, or a play. You've got some who are well-behaved, some who aren't, and some who are just straight-up feral. You've got the quiet ones and the loud ones. I guess you're constantly on edge, worrying about someone bolting into traffic or tripping and breaking their nose. It's a mess.

What a fantastic way to spend an afternoon. I guess you could have been reading a book, taking a nap, or just sleeping with your husband instead. 😍

Amanda Hughes37 said:I completely agree—though I don't know any other moms besides myself who have actually dug their heels in on this... In a perfect world, the kids would be lighting those fireworks only when Dad is right there to supervise.

Well, newsflash: I’m that mom. I wouldn't allow fireworks even if the Pope himself were standing right there.
I made sure the kids and their dad understood exactly where I stood on this.😍

Joshua Parker11 said:Look, you literally admitted right here that you take your kid to McDonald's whenever you get the chance. From what I can tell, you weren't even bothered by the fast food trips or the fact that the teacher covered the kid's lunch. The real issue is that she actually had the nerve to ask for that money back.
Yeah, this whole mess wouldn't even be an issue if the woman hadn't demanded repayment.
If she hadn't, everything would be fine.☕

Do you even have a clue how many times that actually happens in a year?

You have no idea... but hey, at least you finally figured out what you actually wanted.

Whenever I get the chance, I try to fit about two to five of these trips into my life story every year... which, honestly, sounds like a massive amount, doesn't it? ☕

I’d honestly rather just take him to the community pool for that same amount of money.

You're right about one thing—this wouldn't even be an issue if she had just handled things like an adult. But she didn't.

Melissa Gonzalez2 said:You're basically signing a contract saying you won't take the fall for a kid's bullshit...

Right, because if an eighteen-year-old chokes on their own vomit after drinking cheap wine at a prom you were supposed to be supervising, I guess your biggest concern would just be whether or not you signed that liability waiver. 👍

Look, we wouldn't even be having this conversation if YOU had just handled things like an adult when the time came—but, well, you haven't quite gotten there yet.

Kimberly Robinson2 said:No way. First off, you don't eat in a movie theater—it's just not how it works.

And that question of yours? It’s pretty damn provocative, isn't it?

And for all those people who keep insisting that he "borrowed" it—or that she "lent" it to him—let me stop you right there: that’s just plain wrong. He didn't ask for it, and I certainly didn't go asking her to lend it to him. She just handed it over because she didn't want to be the only one sitting there without anything to eat. Fine, whatever... but let's play this out—if I hadn't signed him up for that summer camp in the woods, would she have "lent" him that, too?

The whole thing boils down to her deciding—all on her own, mind you—that she was going to lend something out. Nobody actually asked her to do that. Look, I’m glad she stepped up and was generous, really, I am, but I feel like I've said this a hundred times already: she could have just made it simple. She could have just sent her mom to the school to handle it, but no—instead, she tells him to tell me, and then somehow it turns into me having to send the money through him! It's just unnecessary drama.

She couldn't have given him that money unless he took it himself!!
The kid took the money. It's not like she forced him to grab it, dragged him by the arm, or threatened to get him expelled just to make him order that famous Happy Meal!
If she offered him the cash with the understanding that he'd pay it back, and he took it—then it's a LOAN!

She didn't just hand him the cash and stay quiet, only to chase him around the school the next day demanding it back.🙄

Kimberly Robinson2 said:Do you even have a clue how many times that actually happens in a year?

You have no idea... but hey, at least you finally figured out what you actually wanted.

Whenever I get the chance, I try to fit about two to five of these trips into my life story every year... which, honestly, sounds like a massive amount, doesn't it? ☕

I’d honestly rather just take him to the community pool for that same amount of money.

You're right about one thing—this wouldn't even be an issue if she had just handled things like an adult. But she didn't.

Ugh, sorry, but you're getting boring with all this "life story" talk. I already said it doesn't matter for this topic.

It's not just "frequent," it's more than enough.

Look, just take him somewhere. Teach him yourself at home. Who's stopping you?
But don't expect someone else to feed your kid for free.

Yeah, right. And what "adult way" are we talking about here??
Did you actually act like an adult?
The woman told the kid to tell his mom what happened and asked her to send money through the kid tomorrow. Did you send it?
No.
Did you show up for the meeting?
No.

What do you even want from her?

Man, I really regret not becoming a teacher. Just realizing what kind of perks are actually out there. Take like 20 kids to the movies, and my ticket's on the house. Need to hit the mall? Bring the whole crew along since the gas is free. Plus, a free laptop, some commission from worksheets... basically, the teachers' lounge is like a little paradise with all the snacks and soda.

Take them on a trip to Spain, spend the whole night chasing drunk people around town, and if luck is on my side, maybe someone lights up a joint and I can snag a hit for free too. Everything’s covered, so I might as well bring my five-year-old along just so they can see how the world works and experience the nightlife firsthand—you know, for future reference.

Then there's the parents. Everyone’s got that one kid who’s supposedly a genius but is totally burnt out because nobody gets it. And you get to deal with every weird family dynamic imaginable: dads, stepdads, ex-stepdads, the rich families, the broke ones...
All this just gives me endless material for soap operas since I’ve got plenty of downtime, a pretty light schedule, and enough vacation days to pick up some side gigs.

Seriously, what was I thinking? What an idiot.

I guess I’d probably give my kid money too. I wouldn't even ask for it back since twenty bucks isn't exactly breaking the bank for me. But then again, maybe twenty bucks isn't nothing to her either.
We're all human. People react differently, and you're gonna agree or disagree with how others act. Honestly, I don't think the teacher meant any harm, and that's really all that matters.

Kimberly Robinson2 said:Like I already said, she found out while she was actually buying his lunch. And she was pissed because they didn't even ask for parental permission—they just did it on the sly, tucked away under a desk or something. It’s just not right.

And again, I’ve made my point: my kid is officially off the hook for kitchen duty now. I figure if I hand over the cash, the teacher can just check with the school office to see how I can afford McDonald's but apparently don't have enough for the kitchen fees!

The kitchen fee is probably $80 or $30, I can't remember the exact amount, but this whole trip is only about $60 total. That's practically the same price as the kitchen fee, and honestly, he'll end up eating most of it anyway. Even if he's a tiny thing—what, under 65 pounds?—it still adds up. 😢

It's a double-edged Mac.

Totally forgot about this part... wow, just great.
And then you're supposed to let everything fall apart at school through a little kid, with the teacher cornering him for money... meanwhile, you're being the ADULT by refusing to go to her, return the cash, and explain your private finances.

The teacher isn't acting like an adult here.🙄

hiddendriver34 said:Help me out here—could you walk me through what actually makes a teacher "expert" or "competent"? Beyond just having the right degree and the right license, what are we really talking about?

It’s his results.

Look at the students and the actual knowledge they walk away with after learning from that same educator—not just some random tutor found on Craigslist who was paid out of a parent's pocket for a few hours of instruction.

Do I really need to point out that being perceptive, balanced, and decent matters too?

Kimberly Robinson2 said:We didn't get any parental notice about this!
There was this little scrap of paper—I don't have a photo because he already turned it back into the school—where you're supposed to sign off to give permission for the kid to go here and there for a certain amount of money. It didn't mention anything about going to McDonald's, but everything else was laid out right there.

Furthermore, I really don't think a mother should take a child's account of what happened at McDonald's at face value. I see plenty of you writing about how the child didn't ask to borrow money, but... are you actually sure about that???

I'll find out more on Monday. Once I hear the teachers' version of events, too. For now, I know my kid doesn't "beg"—he doesn't even really grasp the concept. He’s just the type who accepts things if someone offers them (like when he's over at a friend's house). Actually, I just found out that the first time he was at a buddy's place, he ate a fried egg... he wouldn't touch an egg like that at home to save his life! But there, he loved it...😍 Though that's nothing compared to this situation. Even at our place, if friends come over and we have food, I offer it to them.

.......... and he just sits there giving those sad looks to the others eating their hamburgers, wishing someone had helped him feel equal to everyone else so he wouldn't feel less than them......

And how exactly am I supposed to help that kid so he doesn't have to stare sadly at happy families? He sees them everywhere—moms and dads taking their kids to the store to pick out treats and gifts, getting them something nice for Christmas, while he won't! Because he doesn't have a family. It's not his fault, and it's not anyone else's fault—it's mine. I'm the one who didn't want my kid to deal with constant fighting and crying... the one who ended up divorcing his father because he didn't care about the kids, only about his own mother and doing whatever she wanted... yeah, the kid isn't to blame, but seeing this, seeing how he looks at all the other children who get everything they want, it's heartbreaking. Though, personally, I didn't actually see him looking sad.

The only thing is, for Saint Nicholas, he asked for ONLY candy and firecrackers! Nothing else. He got a little gift bag for Saint Nicholas ($3.25 there was a Saint Nicholas themed bag at Walmart with a few chocolate balls for the tree)... and he was absolutely thrilled, though I didn't buy the firecrackers. He got a few tears in his eyes since he couldn't find them, but I just told him I bought them and it just wasn't time for them yet. And that kept the peace.

Ever run into those families that just hit up the malls to blow cash on gifts and candy?
Those families on tighter budgets... you know, the ones who might just get a single candy bar under the tree, maybe some socks or gloves, or just a little something small to make it feel like Christmas? $3.25Can they ever just be happy?
Wait, they don't even have a family?!?!
If you really think that, the guy is seriously pathetic... but what's your deal? Are you his sister, his girlfriend, or some random grandparent?

It’s not about who’s right or wrong, it’s just me. I couldn't stand watching my kid deal with all that fighting and crying every single time... honestly, I ended up divorcing his father because he was too busy catering to his own mother instead of actually stepping up for his kids. Is it the child's fault? No. But seeing them look on like that—seeing how they compare themselves to other kids who get everything handed to them—it's heartbreaking. Though, if I'm being real, I haven't actually seen him look that sad yet.

So, what’s the deal now? Does he actually look bummed out or what? Is he feeling down because money is tight? Or maybe it's because he doesn't have any family around—you know, with his mom and siblings still in the picture?

So, for Saint Nicholas, you only wanted candy and firecrackers? That's it?

That's it?
What should you even expect for Saint Nicholas Day? Honestly, mine never got anything more than some candy.

You’re totally overreacting and making a mountain out of a molehill. What’s the big deal if I told her to bring the cash herself instead of having her mom send it?
If I had to drop my mom off at school, I’d act like it was some huge ordeal, you know? And if she had to pay back money I lent her—even if I just did it to be helpful—I wouldn't mind at all. Once that's out of the way, if there's still drama, nobody's stopping you from heading over there and talking it out face-to-face. Right?
Look, paying back money you borrowed isn't some huge deal. Even a ten-year-old should be able to do that without making a whole thing out of it. Unless, of course, someone else decides to turn it into a massive drama—kind of like how you’re acting right now.

Joshua Parker11 said:She couldn't have given him that money unless he took it himself!!
The kid took the money. It's not like she forced him to grab it, dragged him by the arm, or threatened to get him expelled just to make him order that famous Happy Meal!
If she offered him the cash with the understanding that he'd pay it back, and he took it—then it's a LOAN!

She didn't just hand him the cash and stay quiet, only to chase him around the school the next day demanding it back.🙄

😂
When someone offers a kid drugs one day and they take them, poor thing... how could anyone claim they were "forced" to take it when they clearly didn't want to?

Look, Mom, either the kid needs to learn right from wrong... or you should stop making such a huge scene over this. Just talk to your husband or pay the money back and call it a day. If you actually want to prevent this from happening again—so the kid isn't the only one acting out while everyone else does whatever they want—just have a polite conversation about it and move on. Then the kid can deal with looking at the floor because his mom wouldn't even give him $1.75 for the field trip, even though she totally had the cash. (It's just easier to blame everyone else than to admit you messed up.)