I just can't bring myself to get angry at anyone

😉

My dear friends... Have you ever found yourselves in a position where you simply can't bring yourselves to hold a grudge? Where you realize certain people have treated you quite poorly, yet you feel no anger toward them whatsoever... No resentment, no bitterness... just nothing.
I am curious to know how healthy that actually is... and if it's even a good thing at all...??

It’s just not good.

Every now and then, you really ought to utilize a decent dictionary—maybe even smash something if you have to—otherwise, this whole thing might end up getting on your nerves or, heaven forbid, causing some actual dermatological issues.

urbanmarlin13 said:It’s just not good.

Every now and then, you really ought to utilize a decent dictionary—maybe even smash something if you have to—otherwise, this whole thing might end up getting on your nerves or, heaven forbid, causing some actual dermatological issues.

That’s usually my reaction when I hear someone is unwell, and then you see it all playing out... the anger, the bickering, the petty neighborhood gossip. It’s exhausting. Wouldn't it be better if people actually looked out for one another? But apparently, that's asking too much...

Not really... I actually think it’s a good thing. You aren't poisoning yourself with all that negativity—you shouldn't take someone else's garbage personally in the first place. As for that theory about suppressed frustration building up inside? Doesn't fly with me. You probably just found a different way to vent that's way healthier for your head. Honestly, if everyone handled things this way, the world wouldn't be such a mess 👍 Hopefully once I finally grow up a bit, I'll spend less time holding grudges and more time actually working on myself.

Illness is one thing, or death—that’s a whole different conversation. This is about liberating your own soul, not some sick or departed individual.

I have never, ever understood how people claim they can forgive certain kinds of filth. Or forget. It’s nonsense.

Take me, for instance. If someone screws me over, I might say I "forgive" them, but I can't just wipe the slate clean. Amnesia isn't going to kick in to save me, and I’m left with this nagging, persistent doubt that the same pattern will repeat itself. With people like that, my only option is to turn my back and walk away.

As for world peace? That's never happening, not now and not ever. Quite frankly, you simply cannot—and absolutely should not—waste your energy on certain people.

I don't get angry at people!

Honestly, it’s such a relief to see someone else on the same page here. For the longest time, I genuinely thought I was some kind of prehistoric relic for feeling this way, but... turns out there are others of us.
I mean, what’s even the point of getting worked up? What do you actually gain by holding a grudge against someone?
It just drains my own battery, you know? It's a total waste of energy that I could be using somewhere much more productive.
I truly believe we all have the right to think whatever we want. If someone wants to sit around wallowing in negativity or harboring bad thoughts, that’s entirely their burden to carry, not mine.
I can't help but feel like this mindset is kind of a higher level of consciousness. It isn't about being passive or indifferent, it’s just about having that deep understanding and accepting everyone exactly as they are. At the end of the day, that’s basically the whole core of those Eastern philosophies anyway.

silverraven7 said:I don't get angry at people!

Honestly, it’s such a relief to see someone else on the same page here. For the longest time, I genuinely thought I was some kind of prehistoric relic for feeling this way, but... turns out there are others of us.
I mean, what’s even the point of getting worked up? What do you actually gain by holding a grudge against someone?
It just drains my own battery, you know? It's a total waste of energy that I could be using somewhere much more productive.
I truly believe we all have the right to think whatever we want. If someone wants to sit around wallowing in negativity or harboring bad thoughts, that’s entirely their burden to carry, not mine.
I can't help but feel like this mindset is kind of a higher level of consciousness. It isn't about being passive or indifferent, it’s just about having that deep understanding and accepting everyone exactly as they are. At the end of the day, that’s basically the whole core of those Eastern philosophies anyway.

👍

Steven Scott9 said:😉

My dear friends... Have you ever found yourselves in a position where you simply can't bring yourselves to hold a grudge? Where you realize certain people have treated you quite poorly, yet you feel no anger toward them whatsoever... No resentment, no bitterness... just nothing.
I am curious to know how healthy that actually is... and if it's even a good thing at all...??

Well, if that's how you roll, good for you. Really.
Me? I'm constantly fuming—just stewing and getting worked up and basically driving myself insane over things.
Maybe you just don't get too attached to people in the first place—so when someone acts out or says something nasty, you don't let it sink in.
Honestly, you're living the dream. Serious.

silverraven7 said:I don't get angry at people!

Honestly, it’s such a relief to see someone else on the same page here. For the longest time, I genuinely thought I was some kind of prehistoric relic for feeling this way, but... turns out there are others of us.
I mean, what’s even the point of getting worked up? What do you actually gain by holding a grudge against someone?
It just drains my own battery, you know? It's a total waste of energy that I could be using somewhere much more productive.
I truly believe we all have the right to think whatever we want. If someone wants to sit around wallowing in negativity or harboring bad thoughts, that’s entirely their burden to carry, not mine.
I can't help but feel like this mindset is kind of a higher level of consciousness. It isn't about being passive or indifferent, it’s just about having that deep understanding and accepting everyone exactly as they are. At the end of the day, that’s basically the whole core of those Eastern philosophies anyway.

Reading this just reminded me of how things ended for Gandhi and MLK.

Look, I’m not a fatalist, but there are just some people you simply cannot deal with.

Steven Scott9 said:😉

My dear friends... Have you ever found yourselves in a position where you simply can't bring yourselves to hold a grudge? Where you realize certain people have treated you quite poorly, yet you feel no anger toward them whatsoever... No resentment, no bitterness... just nothing.
I am curious to know how healthy that actually is... and if it's even a good thing at all...??

Yeah, I'm the same way. It’s pretty rare for me to actually get angry. I honestly thought I was the only one who felt this way lol.
Personally, I don't think it's great. There are times when people do things that would make anyone else lose it, but I barely feel anything. Sometimes I force myself to get mad or start an argument just because I know it feels like the "right" reaction to what happened.
Lately though, I've been feeling more irritation, thank God. 🙏 I'm getting there. 😁

I don't think it's just your opinion; honestly, you guys must have some insane luck or Quincy gave you nerves of steel, and I hope He keeps it that way.

Eventually, those nerves start to fray, so you better protect them for when you're older...

Glad to see you've still got it.

Not getting angry at anyone? Man, I don't know about that... maybe you just haven't run into the right kind of person to trigger that yet? There are plenty of horrors out there in the world—and honestly, I doubt you can just shrug them all off. Some people are just unreasonable, zero compromise, and they aren't going to change their minds no matter how much you want them to. I’d be happy if you never met people like that. Okay, so maybe I got a little dark there—I’m still an optimist at heart—but even I get that understanding someone's actions doesn't mean you have to tolerate them. You've gotta keep those two things separate. Personally, I wouldn't say I carry long-term grudges or bitter hatred—that's definitely not healthy—but when you feel something, you feel it. How long it lasts depends entirely on the person. Feelings are what make us human; whatever you're feeling, you have a reason for it, so don't feel ashamed. Understanding *why* you feel that way is a different story, though. It's great if nothing makes you mad, provided that means you actually care about things and don't let people walk over you. Doing nothing isn't always the move. You need boundaries so you don't get exploited—otherwise, your morals don't mean much, and nobody else is going to respect your values if you don't stand by them. Not getting angry is a nice trait, but it can be a double-edged sword... so yeah, I'd say proceed with caution...😁 👍

Oh, and just so we're clear—don't get me wrong. Like, if a group did something shitty to you, saying "hey, I don't approve of this and it bothers me, and I won't be part of it" without actually blowing up at them? That's totally fine. But that doesn't work for everyone, every single time. I'm not saying there's one perfect rule for every situation... there

urbanmarlin13 said:It’s just not good.

Every now and then, you really ought to utilize a decent dictionary—maybe even smash something if you have to—otherwise, this whole thing might end up getting on your nerves or, heaven forbid, causing some actual dermatological issues.

What do you mean by that? 😕

Steven Scott9 said:😉

My dear friends... Have you ever found yourselves in a position where you simply can't bring yourselves to hold a grudge? Where you realize certain people have treated you quite poorly, yet you feel no anger toward them whatsoever... No resentment, no bitterness... just nothing.
I am curious to know how healthy that actually is... and if it's even a good thing at all...??

Generally speaking, I find it pretty hard to get angry at people. Maybe it's because I'm subconsciously afraid of hurting them with my temper. But then again, after absorbing enough nonsense, there comes a day where I finally snap and say everything that needs to be said—it’s just how I’m wired. Of course, it really depends on the individual and what they mean to me. There have been times when people I actually care about have treated me terribly, yet I still couldn't find it in me to stay mad...
Like anything else, this "trait" is a double-edged sword. It all comes down to what you choose to hold against someone...

Honestly, getting all worked up is just a waste of energy. If someone’s getting on your nerves, why even deal with them? Just walk away...........

Steven Scott9 said:😉

My dear friends... Have you ever found yourselves in a position where you simply can't bring yourselves to hold a grudge? Where you realize certain people have treated you quite poorly, yet you feel no anger toward them whatsoever... No resentment, no bitterness... just nothing.
I am curious to know how healthy that actually is... and if it's even a good thing at all...??

It’s perfectly fine, provided it isn't just surface-level. Some people act like nothing gets under their skin—and they honestly believe they're fine—but they're really just bottling it all up until it manifests as something physical, like heart disease or something equally nasty. That's way worse than having an occasional outburst.

But truly being able to let everything go—body and soul—without holding onto resentment? That's pretty much peak existence.

That's a separate issue entirely: whether we should put up with being mistreated long-term just because we aren't angry or because we think we love the person.

I honestly think that’s a beautiful quality—it takes real strength and a solid sense of self to pull that off. You know that old saying? A person is only as big as the things that manage to rattle them. Or something like that...

I’m still working on not letting everyone else's drama and frustrations get under my skin. I've realized that people who are actually happy with themselves and their own lives don't really feel the need to lash out at others. Still, I catch myself being unable to stand being near someone who's wronged me for a while after it happens. I forgive, sure, but I don't forget. If someone lets me down once in a blue moon, I can move past it with a smile, but those are exceptions. Usually, if someone screws you over once, they’ll probably do it again—at least, that's been my experience.

Anyway, I think your approach is spot on! The worst thing you can do is take your anger out on innocent people, because then you're just feeding into this endless cycle... though, I suppose it helps some people in the short term. If you do feel that anger bubbling up, it's better to go kill yourself at the gym, or dance, or even just vent here on the forum—anything to keep it from just sitting inside you and festering...

Seriously, thank you all so much for the feedback...

Just one more thing... When I mentioned that I wouldn't get angry; what I meant was that while it might sting a little at first, the feeling passes quickly. I don't harbor any real hatred toward those people, nor am I actually mad... I just can't bring myself to hold a grudge. It feels like if I tried to force myself to be resentful, it just wouldn't work. So now...????

I honestly wonder where you hide all that resentment—it’s like you're tucking it away into these little mental drawers, and I can't help but think: what happens when they all finally overflow? 😳
As for me, I don't really get angry—not at all—I stay perfectly calm for a month, maybe a year, even two... but I suppose when I finally do hit my breaking point, the resulting explosion is so massive it practically creates a whole new universe. 😁

That’s just how people act when they refuse to catch feelings for anyone—people who've basically given up on expecting anything from others besides a massive letdown.
Or maybe they just think they don't deserve better. Personally? I think if you actually have an ounce of self-respect, you're gonna get pissed off about certain things. If you truly don't give a damn about anything, something's definitely broken in your head.☕