Does it feel like everyone just wants to be a martyr?

Hey Karen Adams2,
I really want to adopt that mindset too,
instead of just living in fear....🙂

Larry Howard8 said:Hey Karen Adams2,
I really want to adopt that mindset too,
instead of just living in fear....🙂

Now, what Larry Howard8 said might sound like some sort of New Age nonsense to some people, but if you really stop to think about it, there is so much truth buried in those words; you are essentially the architect of your own thoughts. It sounds a bit terrifying when you put it that way, but it's absolutely the reality. I've come across some of your posts in other threads, and I truly feel like I understand where you're coming from—you're afraid, but you're mostly terrified of things that haven't even happened yet, or things that might never actually materialize, yet you're busy constructing a personal version of hell through your own contemplation. In a way, you're almost inviting those problems into your life. Life is beautiful, despite everything; bad things happen to everyone, but some people find a way to navigate them while others simply give up. At the end of the day, we all choose whether we want to be fighters or victims.
Nothing in my life is perfect either—not that perfection actually exists in this world—and I could easily spend my entire day obsessing over everything that's missing or everything that's going wrong, just letting myself become bitter. Or, I can choose to focus on everything I do have, everything that makes me feel lucky, and live this day exactly the way I want to! Just take it one day at a time!

Karen Adams2 said:Now, what Larry Howard8 said might sound like some sort of New Age nonsense to some people, but if you really stop to think about it, there is so much truth buried in those words; you are essentially the architect of your own thoughts. It sounds a bit terrifying when you put it that way, but it's absolutely the reality. I've come across some of your posts in other threads, and I truly feel like I understand where you're coming from—you're afraid, but you're mostly terrified of things that haven't even happened yet, or things that might never actually materialize, yet you're busy constructing a personal version of hell through your own contemplation. In a way, you're almost inviting those problems into your life. Life is beautiful, despite everything; bad things happen to everyone, but some people find a way to navigate them while others simply give up. At the end of the day, we all choose whether we want to be fighters or victims.
Nothing in my life is perfect either—not that perfection actually exists in this world—and I could easily spend my entire day obsessing over everything that's missing or everything that's going wrong, just letting myself become bitter. Or, I can choose to focus on everything I do have, everything that makes me feel lucky, and live this day exactly the way I want to! Just take it one day at a time!

Those dark thoughts have completely taken over me,
along with all the fears.
I shouldn't have even been born if I can't even live a normal life.

Carl Jones41 said:Are they just looking for attention? Pity?
I don't know... 😁

Oh, this is absolutely the answer right here. I mean, let's be real, everyone wants to be noticed. Some people go about it by being loud and obnoxious, while others try to play it cool and subtle, but deep down, they all know what they're doing and they crave that recognition.

Regarding that other thread, you know, the one asking "If someone asked if you wanted to be born, would you say..."

Honestly, every single person who answered "No" is just fishing for attention. They know their comment isn't going to actually reach the specific person they might be thinking of, but hey, they don't feel any shame in shouting "Hey, look at me, notice my existence!" even if the intended recipient never sees it. It just makes them feel a little lighter, I guess—it’s like they’re getting a tiny hit of validation knowing that, somewhere out there in the digital void, someone actually read their words and knows they exist.

Just my two cents.🤷

Is this just an excuse for being lazy and a coward?

It’s basically like saying, "It's not my fault, it's my environment, it's my mom for being strict, I have seven different diagnoses, I'm totally helpless, life is just out to get me, there's nothing I can do."

And then you just use that as a reason to stay curled up in bed and do absolutely nothing?

What do you guys think?

Also, looking at how churches operate (like I mentioned earlier), I really don't get why they put such a huge emphasis on suffering.

I suppose Christian doctrine also plays a role here, subconsciously pushing us toward a sort of martyr complex.

Larry Howard8 said:You make a good point,
but most of them are actually quite sick,
they didn't choose this state of mind and they're trying their best to get out of it,
though you do get those people who just want to stay miserable because they're bored
since they don't have any real problems to deal with...

🤷

Do you see a bit of yourself in that?

Being "emo" is trendy.
There isn't much profound wisdom to be found there.

goldenraven9 said:Do you see a bit of yourself in that?

Being "emo" is trendy.
There isn't much profound wisdom to be found there.

Emo is for teenagers. I'm 27.

In that case, why on earth do you insist on constantly peddling such baseless rumors?

goldenraven9 said:In that case, why on earth do you insist on constantly peddling such baseless rumors?

Because that’s just how I feel—unwanted, trapped, scared, and all alone.

goldenraven9 said:In that case, why on earth do you insist on constantly peddling such baseless rumors?

I mean, maybe the woman actually does have some issues going on, because let's be real—99% of people just act out because they’re desperate for attention, but you know there are those rare cases where someone genuinely struggles with it, and I'd say most folks just take everything way too personally and end up hurting themselves over it.

goldenraven9 said:Do you see a bit of yourself in that?

Being "emo" is trendy.
There isn't much profound wisdom to be found there.

BRAVO! I totally forgot about them! Emo is basically that vibe!

Yeah, they all act like teenagers, but honestly? It's just because us adults realize how silly it is. If someone showed up to work or college looking like that, people would probably think they're having a breakdown. Adults just find different ways to be losers!

Though, honestly, the emo thing is so huge it probably needs its own thread!

Aaron Anderson72 said:Is this just an excuse for being lazy and a coward?

It’s basically like saying, "It's not my fault, it's my environment, it's my mom for being strict, I have seven different diagnoses, I'm totally helpless, life is just out to get me, there's nothing I can do."

And then you just use that as a reason to stay curled up in bed and do absolutely nothing?

What do you guys think?

Also, looking at how churches operate (like I mentioned earlier), I really don't get why they put such a huge emphasis on suffering.

Maybe it's because "suffering" is basically just a fancy way of saying you turn the other cheek. Like, someone throws a rock at you, and instead of throwing bread back, you just take the hit. You end up with a lump on your head, but hey, you didn't retaliate—you're a good little Christian, spreading love and all that. At least, that’s how I interpreted it growing up while my mom dragged me to service every Sunday, haha.😁

Look, people are just wired this way. They'll weaponize just about anything. Some people actually have issues, some people worry they might have issues so they go down a Google rabbit hole (and end up convinced they're dying or totally fine), and then there are the ones who performatively act out, inventing drama just to stay in the spotlight.

There’s also the whole overpopulation thing to consider (maybe we should get more educated on birth control 😛), which adds layers to the explanation. But really, it boils down to this:
You hang out with a friend. You guys joke around, she’s upbeat, everything is chill—just standard, lighthearted conversation about life and big dreams. It’s a normal vibe, you chat, you part ways, and that’s that.
Then you have the *other* kind of friend. She’s got a thousand problems. Everything is wrong, everything is terrible, she’s depressed, she’s crying, she’s moping... And obviously, you don't want to be a jerk and leave a lady stranded in the middle of town, so you step in to comfort her. You ask "what happened?" and try to soothe her. That attention ends up being way more intense than the fun time you had with the first friend—mostly because you’re walking on eggshells, terrified that if you say one wrong thing, she’ll burst into tears or blow up at you after thirty minutes of peace. Most people are addicted to that intensity. It’s heavy, and honestly, hardly anyone has the guts to just say, "Hey, shut up already, you're being exhausting." But nobody wants to look like the "bad guy."

Personally, I gravitate toward people with positive energy. Usually, a little bit of that rubs off on you and you actually feel happy 🙂. Or maybe we’ve all just had our brains washed. There's constant garbage in the world; you can practically predict the news cycle (doom, doom, and more doom)... Maybe we just don't know any better anymore. 🤷

(Yeah, yeah, whatever. Kids these days will probably grow up watching versions of Cinderella where the prince is a total jerk and Cinderella just pops a pill because her love life is a wreck.)

P.S. lol here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5QHJzWddOa8. (If you're actually dealing with serious issues, please don't take this to heart)

feralseal10 said:Maybe it's because "suffering" is basically just a fancy way of saying you turn the other cheek. Like, someone throws a rock at you, and instead of throwing bread back, you just take the hit. You end up with a lump on your head, but hey, you didn't retaliate—you're a good little Christian, spreading love and all that. At least, that’s how I interpreted it growing up while my mom dragged me to service every Sunday, haha.😁

Look, people are just wired this way. They'll weaponize just about anything. Some people actually have issues, some people worry they might have issues so they go down a Google rabbit hole (and end up convinced they're dying or totally fine), and then there are the ones who performatively act out, inventing drama just to stay in the spotlight.

There’s also the whole overpopulation thing to consider (maybe we should get more educated on birth control 😛), which adds layers to the explanation. But really, it boils down to this:
You hang out with a friend. You guys joke around, she’s upbeat, everything is chill—just standard, lighthearted conversation about life and big dreams. It’s a normal vibe, you chat, you part ways, and that’s that.
Then you have the *other* kind of friend. She’s got a thousand problems. Everything is wrong, everything is terrible, she’s depressed, she’s crying, she’s moping... And obviously, you don't want to be a jerk and leave a lady stranded in the middle of town, so you step in to comfort her. You ask "what happened?" and try to soothe her. That attention ends up being way more intense than the fun time you had with the first friend—mostly because you’re walking on eggshells, terrified that if you say one wrong thing, she’ll burst into tears or blow up at you after thirty minutes of peace. Most people are addicted to that intensity. It’s heavy, and honestly, hardly anyone has the guts to just say, "Hey, shut up already, you're being exhausting." But nobody wants to look like the "bad guy."

Personally, I gravitate toward people with positive energy. Usually, a little bit of that rubs off on you and you actually feel happy 🙂. Or maybe we’ve all just had our brains washed. There's constant garbage in the world; you can practically predict the news cycle (doom, doom, and more doom)... Maybe we just don't know any better anymore. 🤷

(Yeah, yeah, whatever. Kids these days will probably grow up watching versions of Cinderella where the prince is a total jerk and Cinderella just pops a pill because her love life is a wreck.)

P.S. lol here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5QHJzWddOa8. (If you're actually dealing with serious issues, please don't take this to heart)

That video is awesome! 😉

Aaron Anderson72 said:Honestly, being happy seems way too easy and kind of boring!

If there’s an 80% chance things are awesome and only a 20% chance they suck, everyone still finds a way to spiral and act like it's the end of the world!
It’s like that classic move: "I GOT AN A!!!!!!!!!!!!!" even though you actually scored an 87% on the test.

Like when some girl starts a thread panicking that she might be pregnant, driving herself crazy, even though the odds are basically 0.00000046 %.
She could have just grabbed a Starbucks and worked on a crossword, or even just sat out in the sun for a bit!

Then you see another thread where a ton of people say they wouldn't have even been born if they had the choice!

If there isn't a problem, we can always just invent one!
When everything is going great, we start worrying about a black hole swallowing the country, or a meteor hitting YOUR specific car, or a volcano erupting in your backyard. And if nothing else works, there's always: "Ugh, I can never be 100% sure my partner isn't cheating on me!"

Just look at the whole swine flu scare. Even if you're perfectly healthy and it would just be a couple of days of fever, we turned it into a massive panic. It was all over the news and every newspaper, everywhere you looked!

To wrap it up, it feels like people would rather choose suffering over an easy life. They just ignore everything that gives them a reason to smile and focus entirely on why things suck!

By the way, what’s the big symbol of faith in our society? THE CROSS!!!!!
The Cross, folks! It's a symbol used to glorify Jesus' SUFFERING! We celebrate it in church constantly. You hear it during Mass—stuff like "blessed are the poor," "blessed are the hungry," "blessed are the oppressed." The church glorifies suffering! It teaches that you need to suffer here on Earth to make it into heaven later. Like, Jesus was on the cross for a few hours after living 33 years, so that's all we focus on!

And if your life is actually perfect, you can always just reminisce about some drama you had ten years ago!
Or look at those old ladies on the bus who look like they want to bite your head off, wearing enough makeup to barely hold their faces up, lecturing everyone about kids, politics, or quoting Latin to complain about how teenagers play violent video games (when they probably don't even know what a computer is). Basically, if nothing is bothering you, you can always stress out over someone else's lack of morals! Then you become a victim again because: "I live in such a wicked and cruel world, I just can't stand the suffering and evil people inflict on each other."

We can even stress about how millions of chickens are slaughtered every single day just to feed people! Gross.😢

Mostly, this whole pile of mental issues and nonsense... come on people, snap out of it! You're healthy, you have food, you can grab a drink, you can afford your coffee, the sun is still yellow, the air is fresh, you've got friends, maybe a dog, a TV, and if you've got a partner, hey, that's great too. Life is beautiful if you actually choose to see it that way!

Cheers! 🙂

... well, I guess you ended up shitting the bed after all...

Aaron Anderson72 said:BRAVO! I totally forgot about them! Emo is basically that vibe!

Yeah, they all act like teenagers, but honestly? It's just because us adults realize how silly it is. If someone showed up to work or college looking like that, people would probably think they're having a breakdown. Adults just find different ways to be losers!

Though, honestly, the emo thing is so huge it probably needs its own thread!

Honestly, I feel like Emo is just this desperate attempt by teenagers to finally be noticed by the world. I know a few people who actually carry themselves with this weird sense of pride over their whole "emo" aesthetic, which is just... I don't even know, man. It honestly baffles me.

Since we were talking about those emo videos earlier, well, here goes nothing: I can't actually watch videos through links like that, so I'm flying blind here. If you want me to dive into whatever madness is happening in that clip, you're gonna have to give me the rundown—tell me what's going on, who's talking, or just vent about why it's bothering you. Once you lay out the details, I'll be happy to jump in and give you my two cents, though knowing me, I'll probably end up going off on a tangent about something completely unrelated. Just hit me with the context!

Kevin Ramos10 said:I mean, maybe the woman actually does have some issues going on, because let's be real—99% of people just act out because they’re desperate for attention, but you know there are those rare cases where someone genuinely struggles with it, and I'd say most folks just take everything way too personally and end up hurting themselves over it.

I don't doubt that possibility—believe me, I deal with my own fair share of baggage—but the reality here is that she does nothing but vent and ask for advice that she has absolutely no intention of actually following.
She's as useful as a broken screen on a smartphone.
It seems, quite clearly, that she actually finds a certain comfort in playing the victim.
Caramel, don't get me wrong, I'm not attacking you personally, but let's be honest about how things actually are.

goldenraven9 said:I don't doubt that possibility—believe me, I deal with my own fair share of baggage—but the reality here is that she does nothing but vent and ask for advice that she has absolutely no intention of actually following.
She's as useful as a broken screen on a smartphone.
It seems, quite clearly, that she actually finds a certain comfort in playing the victim.
Caramel, don't get me wrong, I'm not attacking you personally, but let's be honest about how things actually are.

Alright, look, I haven't been following this whole PDF thread for very long, but even so, you can't just jump on a girl like that. She's clearly dealing with her own stuff and has her own way of processing things, and if she's reaching out to ask for help, I guarantee nobody is going to step up if all they offer are snarky comments or constant judgment.

I understand that some people are genuinely facing real struggles, but most of them don't actually take any steps to fix their situations. They just complain and wallow, foolishly expecting everything to resolve itself magically.
Well, it won't. Nothing changes overnight; it takes time and hard work. You have to stay persistent if you want things to finally fall into place.

What do people mean by an "easy life"? Is it just having everything handed to you and not giving a damn about anything? Life isn't easy—if it were, there wouldn't be any problems to deal with in the first place.