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Home › Society › Psychology › Exploring lesbian experimentation in your early 20s?

Exploring lesbian experimentation in your early 20s?

Started by Jeremy Baker6 · · 👁 5 views · 153 replies

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Participants Jeremy Baker6boldjackal10Alex Patel96slymaker26Jason Ross2James Ramirez10Jerry Martinez5Nathan Kelly5Brenda Jackson95swiftrider80Mark Harris63Peter Phillips32Betty Myers7Sean Cruzrowdyotter65hiddenhound3slywolf45lonegardenerhollowtinker18Edward Wilson82Megan Diaz33Justin Allen81Edward Murphy4wiredpuma9 …
lonegardener lonegardener Regular
347 messages
joined Apr 2010
#141 ·
Justin Allen81 said:Alright, fine—maybe I overreacted a bit.

But look, let’s clear things up first: homophobia doesn't pose a direct threat to me. Even though I'm bisexual, I'm currently in a relationship with a man—and since I don't explicitly broadcast my sexual orientation to him, there's zero reason for him to assume I'm anything other than a good, traditional American woman. But here's where I stand:

Okay, you (not you specifically, but just some hypothetical person) are homophobic. That means you harbor hatred toward gay people. As long as you don't act on it or express it, that's your right.
I hate you (acting as the personification of the homophobe here). That's fine too, provided I don't act on it.

However, if you start discriminating against gay people—in any capacity whatsoever—then I will feel compelled to discriminate against you. Isn't that just basic fairness? 😁

And again, I’m not talking about YOU as a person on this forum—I mean your actual identity, name and all. I'm talking about the homophobe.

Oh yeah, sounds perfectly fair to me. 😍
Justin Allen81 Justin Allen81 Member
31 messages
joined Apr 2010
#142 ·
lonegardener said:Oh yeah, sounds perfectly fair to me. 😍

See? We actually get along quite well. It’s a good thing we're only talking through a screen 😍
Sean Cruz Sean Cruz Regular
265 messages
joined Apr 2008
#143 ·
Justin Allen81 said:Good grief. Please stop spouting nonsense about things you clearly don't understand.
"My Secret Garden" by Nancy Friday was an actual study on female sexual fantasies conducted back in the 1970s—quite thorough, too—covering a representative sample of women across all ages (in the US, Europe, etc.).
So, it’s a scientific study, not some random bullshit.
Though, I'll admit, it's a fun read, haha.😁

As for the original poster, it's the same old story. How have I not learned to avoid any thread touching on anything related to homosexuality yet? It always leaves me disgusted seeing what people post.

Homophobes make me sick—truly. I think you're all just uneducated, narrow-minded cattle. Look, if a moderator needs to hand out a ban, then fine, let them—but I honestly believe people like that deserve to be insulted, because they're nothing but trash. Just like racists or xenophobes... They aren't even real people; the normal rules of society don't apply to them.

It’s fascinating how everyone has latched onto this one insignificant book while completely ignoring basic biology. On the other hand, you’ve skimmed the topic so superficially that you missed the entire point, yet you still feel entitled to be insulting. But then again, that's just your level of discourse—it says everything about you and nothing about me.😉

Thanks, lonegardener. You’re a true gentleman. 🙂
Justin Allen81 Justin Allen81 Member
31 messages
joined Apr 2010
#144 ·
If I’ve misread the situation—though I doubt it, given that the OP clearly holds a negative view toward sexual experimentation during youth (which, let's be honest, is perfectly natural)—then my apologies. However, you jumped to a conclusion about a subject you're clearly uninformed about. What am I supposed to do with that? Spend thirty minutes lecturing you on basic biology and human sexuality? I don't see the point; you’d probably just dismiss my arguments as nonsense anyway.

My comment was strictly about your assessment of the book, nothing more. I didn't call YOU an idiot—I don't think that. But your assumption regarding a book you haven't read, seen, or even Googled, specifically, and I quote:

"Oh, so these are those books like 'Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus' or whatever. Does anyone actually take that stuff seriously?"

I'm sorry if you took offense; that wasn't my intention. But if you think your previous comment wasn't total nonsense... well, it was.
Sean Cruz Sean Cruz Regular
265 messages
joined Apr 2008
#145 ·
Justin Allen81 said:If I’ve misread the situation—though I doubt it, given that the OP clearly holds a negative view toward sexual experimentation during youth (which, let's be honest, is perfectly natural)—then my apologies. However, you jumped to a conclusion about a subject you're clearly uninformed about. What am I supposed to do with that? Spend thirty minutes lecturing you on basic biology and human sexuality? I don't see the point; you’d probably just dismiss my arguments as nonsense anyway.

My comment was strictly about your assessment of the book, nothing more. I didn't call YOU an idiot—I don't think that. But your assumption regarding a book you haven't read, seen, or even Googled, specifically, and I quote:

"Oh, so these are those books like 'Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus' or whatever. Does anyone actually take that stuff seriously?"

I'm sorry if you took offense; that wasn't my intention. But if you think your previous comment wasn't total nonsense... well, it was.

The user I was replying to clearly has no grasp of biology, tossing out completely nonsensical arguments that you somehow missed while focusing on how "uninformed" I am. 🙄 It seems you also overlooked the link to the sexuality thread on this site. That thread actually contains high-quality posts and legitimate arguments about sexuality, unlike the pseudo-arguments being pushed by Peter Phillips32. Have you even read his posts to see the sheer amount of logical fallacies involved, or are you just attacking my posts because I don't share your perspective?
By the way, there's no need to apologize; we're on an internet forum, you can't "offend" me. Just try reading the actual thread for once before drawing conclusions.
slywolf45 slywolf45 Regular
299 messages
joined Apr 2016
#146 ·
Justin Allen81 said:Alright, fine—maybe I overreacted a bit.

But look, let’s clear things up first: homophobia doesn't pose a direct threat to me. Even though I'm bisexual, I'm currently in a relationship with a man—and since I don't explicitly broadcast my sexual orientation to him, there's zero reason for him to assume I'm anything other than a good, traditional American woman. But here's where I stand:

Okay, you (not you specifically, but just some hypothetical person) are homophobic. That means you harbor hatred toward gay people. As long as you don't act on it or express it, that's your right.
I hate you (acting as the personification of the homophobe here). That's fine too, provided I don't act on it.

However, if you start discriminating against gay people—in any capacity whatsoever—then I will feel compelled to discriminate against you. Isn't that just basic fairness? 😁

And again, I’m not talking about YOU as a person on this forum—I mean your actual identity, name and all. I'm talking about the homophobe.

Yeah, fair enough... and I can certainly get why you’d feel a sense of revulsion toward people who harbor hate for others—especially when those people haven't actually done a single thing to harm them or even cross their path.

As for hating homophobes... "hate" might be a bit of an overstatement for me. At least, in my experience, I wouldn't say I harbor this primal, deep-seated hatred for someone who's just passing through my life.
It's obvious that I don't like them and certainly don't want them in my inner circle, but true hatred? Honestly, I'd only feel that if someone actually laid hands on me.😲
Peter Phillips32 Peter Phillips32 Active Member
154 messages
joined May 2009
#147 ·
Look, I keep bringing up liberalism and all those other buzzwords you guys love to cling to, but my whole point—the actual core of what I’m driving at here—is whether change is actually doable, you know? Like, if it's even practically possible. 🙂

I honestly don't have the energy to chew on this same crap all over again.
Alex Patel96 Alex Patel96 Active Member
139 messages
joined Apr 2009
#148 ·
Peter Phillips32 said:Look, I keep bringing up liberalism and all those other buzzwords you guys love to cling to, but my whole point—the actual core of what I’m driving at here—is whether change is actually doable, you know? Like, if it's even practically possible. 🙂

I honestly don't have the energy to chew on this same crap all over again.

Seriously?🍿 That philosophy reminds me of those old-school experts trying to force left-handed kids to write with their right hands.🙂

It's clear that this kind of primitive thinking just never goes away.☕
Peter Phillips32 Peter Phillips32 Active Member
154 messages
joined May 2009
#149 ·
Alex Patel96 said:Seriously?🍿 That philosophy reminds me of those old-school experts trying to force left-handed kids to write with their right hands.🙂

It's clear that this kind of primitive thinking just never goes away.☕

Look, I think you’ve got some serious mental blocks going on here, like there’s some kind of fog clouding your vision or something. Because if you actually read my posts, I never once mentioned forcing anyone to change, nor did I ever claim to know what's "good" for anyone else.
Besides, I don't see any harm in someone deciding on their own they want to work on becoming ambidextrous. Which, if I really have to spell it out for you, is basically the exact point I'm making.
Clearly, pure primitivism is never going to be wiped out.☕

It’s pretty obvious you’re just hiding behind empty platitudes.
wiredpuma9 wiredpuma9 Newcomer
7 messages
joined Nov 2009
#150 ·
Your theories remind me of that old argument that humans are naturally bisexual—the same one you shot down before.

Peter Phillips32 said:Exactly. I’m arguing that choosing which gender you climax with or enjoy sex with is an actual possibility.
A child starts learning while their nervous system is still developing in the womb, sensing the world through vibrations and sound. Up until a certain age (maybe around 4?), they can't tell reality from fantasy. Since kids just soak up everything around them without any critical thinking, they basically absorb the state of the world as "normal." When someone is conditioned by a non-liberal environment to be heterosexual, they end up modeling their own sexuality after the concept of "Mom and Dad." Because Mom and Dad are the default, it feels natural, pleasant, and desirable. Society loves what is "natural" and "pleasant," so the individual feels the need to conform to those standards to fit in. (I think you see where this is heading.)
When something is rooted this deeply, it gets labeled as "natural"—hence all our stereotypes about being born strictly heterosexual because "that's how God made us." (Don't get mad about the religious reference; I'm not going to debate that.)

If this is purely about choice and social conditioning, how do you explain homosexuality popping up in extremely homophobic environments, where people are taught from birth that it's wrong or repulsive?
Justin Allen81 Justin Allen81 Member
31 messages
joined Apr 2010
#151 ·
I mean, sure—if you want to call me militantly opinionated or whatever... I guess I am.😁
Just kidding. Honestly, it doesn't feel like these discussions are really about anything meaningful to me anymore—it seems I just get worked up way too easily.
Whatever! 😍
Justin Gomez2 Justin Gomez2 Member
12 messages
joined Jul 2012
#152 ·
Jeremy Baker6 said:The headline pretty much sums it up. Why on earth do girls do this?

Curiosity, following a trend, breaking taboos, seeking new experiences, exploring their own sexuality...🤷
If we're talking about girls who are usually straight
slywolf45 slywolf45 Regular
299 messages
joined Apr 2016
#153 ·
Justin Allen81 said:I mean, sure—if you want to call me militantly opinionated or whatever... I guess I am.😁
Just kidding. Honestly, it doesn't feel like these discussions are really about anything meaningful to me anymore—it seems I just get worked up way too easily.
Whatever! 😍

I used to be exactly the same way...😍
Peter Phillips32 Peter Phillips32 Active Member
154 messages
joined May 2009
#154 ·
I honestly don't even know where to start with this whole Republic of Korea situation, because man, it’s just one of those things that makes you sit back and realize how messy global politics can actually get when you stop looking at the headlines for five seconds. It’s like watching a high-stakes drama unfold on a loop, except instead of actors, you’ve got massive geopolitical powers playing chess with actual human lives, which is pretty heavy when you really think about it. You look at the tension there and it reminds me of how intense things can get in certain parts of the US when political divides start feeling less like a debate and more like a standoff, though obviously on a much more volatile scale. People love to jump in with their two cents without actually grasping the historical baggage involved, and frankly, I think most folks are just reacting to the noise rather than the actual substance of what's happening on the ground. It's exhausting, really, trying to keep up with the shifting alliances and the constant threat of things boiling over, especially when you feel like the big players are just moving pieces around for their own benefit while everyone else deals with the fallout. It’s a mess, a total mess, and honestly, I’m just sitting here wondering if anyone’s actually looking at the long-term consequences or if we’re all just waiting for the next inevitable explosion. kaže:
Man, these theories you're throwing around really remind me of that whole "humans are naturally bisexual" argument—you know, the one you totally shut down back in the day.

I mean, look, I honestly gave that theory some thought for a minute there—I actually went along with it at first—but then I started overthinking things, as I usually do, and realized how much of a mess the whole concept actually is. Once you really sit with it, you start seeing how someone can be both sexual and asexual at the same time depending on the headspace they're in, whether that’s something forced on them by circumstances or just a personal choice they've made. It’s all about where and how you decide to express that side of yourself, which is entirely up to the individual and can shift whenever the hell they want it to. So, honestly, this whole little outburst of yours? It's pretty much meaningless until you actually figure out where you stand.

Look, setting aside the whole biological requirement where you obviously need two sexes to actually make a new human being—and yeah, I know how biology works, don't get me started—I’m talking more about the psychological side of things here, you know? It's really more about that whole "mind over matter" concept, where the mental state and the headspace you're in play a much bigger role than just the physical mechanics of it all.
Look, if you’re trying to argue that it’s all just about how you’re raised or the people you hang out with, then you’ve got a massive hole in your logic, right? I mean, how on earth do you explain the fact that people come out as gay in these super intense, ultra-conservative pockets of middle America? We're talking about places where from the second you're born, they're drilling it into your head that being anything other than straight is absolutely disgusting and fundamentally wrong. If it were strictly about environmental influence, those kids would just blend right in, wouldn't they? But they don't. You can't just "teach" someone to change their core nature by shouting at them in a church basement or whatever, no matter how hard they try to enforce those rigid social norms.

I’ve been rambling on about how much your surroundings mess with you while you're growing up, mostly because when you're a kid, that environment is basically your entire universe—you don't even realize it's there, you just absorb it like a sponge until someone actually points out what's going on around you. It's like you're living in a bubble that you didn't even ask to be in. You can't really make a choice for yourself until you finally break free and develop some actual critical thinking skills, which is basically that mental toolkit that lets you tell the difference between what's actually real and the nonsense people try to feed you, and only then—once you've got that clarity—can you actually stand on your own two feet and make a decision that's truly yours.

When people ask me why I take the stance I do, my answer is pretty simple: "Why not?" Look, playing it safe and just nodding along with the crowd—that pure, unadulterated conformism—it doesn't actually move the needle on anything. It’s a trap. Most of the time, all that mindless agreement does is buy you a little bit of temporary peace while you wait for the next big idea to drop or for someone with an actual backbone to show up and tell everyone else they're being idiots. If you're just going along to get along, you aren't changing the world; you're just waiting for someone else to do the heavy lifting for you.😁

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