People who stand out from the crowd

Have you ever actually crossed paths with someone who just... stands out from the crowd? I mean, sure, we’re all biologically cut from the same cloth—we’ve got limbs, heads, we walk upright, the usual anatomy—but I’m talking about the psychological core, that specific essence of a person's character.

For instance, most people are just... fine. They're decent enough. But then you run into someone whose kindness is almost overwhelming, or maybe they’re incredibly withdrawn—like, pathologically introverted—or perhaps they possess an exceptional beauty, a sharp intellect, or a sense of humor so distinct that everyone in the room is instantly drawn to them. You know exactly what I'm getting at. 🙂

I don't seem to run into people like that very often... 🤷

What’s your take on these types of individuals? Have you ever actually encountered someone like that in your own life?

Everyone tells me I fit that description perfectly. Honestly, I can’t even argue with them. Every single person who’s ever met me has called me weird, eccentric, or just "different." Sometimes people can see it the second I walk into a room—they say I look lost or like my head is stuck in the clouds. I guess that’s just what happens when you’re as much of an introvert as I am.
And yeah, people like us are rare. Aside from myself, I only know two other people who actually operate this way.

What you're describing (that post above) doesn't really strike me as an advantage 😉 I guess I'm thinking about introversion 🤷
Everyone tries to be unique these days, which just makes them blend right back into the crowd 😁

hiddenhawk3 said:What you're describing (that post above) doesn't really strike me as an advantage 😉 I guess I'm thinking about introversion 🤷
Everyone tries to be unique these days, which just makes them blend right back into the crowd 😁

Being an introvert is just one part of who I am. It has nothing to do with being "special" or trying to stand out from the crowd. And honestly? In this day and age, it's often more of a disadvantage than anything else.

Being an introvert is just one trait among many—it doesn't automatically make someone "special," nor does it mean they stand out from the crowd. And honestly? In the world we live in, it’s often anything but an advantage.

I'm with you there. It’s rarely a benefit; more often than not, those types end up isolated or struggling with mental health issues—not everyone, obviously, but a huge portion of them.

hiddenhawk3 said:everyone wants to feel unique in their own way, which ultimately just makes them blend right back into the masses😁

True, but there is a massive distinction between wanting to be different and actually being different. 😉

hiddenhawk3 said:what you described above doesn't exactly strike me as an advantage😉

She never claimed it was an advantage; she was simply describing who she is.

We aren't talking about being "superior" here—that's not what "specialness" means. We're talking about people who simply diverge from the norm in some capacity. It's the same as someone standing out because of a quirky fashion sense, or maybe just having striking eyes.

Alex Patel96 said:Being an introvert is just one part of who I am. It has nothing to do with being "special" or trying to stand out from the crowd. And honestly? In this day and age, it's often more of a disadvantage than anything else.

I mean, fine 😁 I don't know, that's really the only thing you mentioned about being unique 🙂
Yeah, I guess. It’s probably not easy being an introvert these days.

Here we go again. I can already see the types of people who are going to show up here—the ones who get all worked up just because someone else is different, or heaven forbid, actually better than them. It’s always the same story. These people are a thorn in everyone's side, whether it's in real life or right here on this forum.

Donna Wood52 said:

Being an introvert is just one trait among many—it doesn't automatically make someone "special," nor does it mean they stand out from the crowd. And honestly? In the world we live in, it’s often anything but an advantage.

I'm with you there. It’s rarely a benefit; more often than not, those types end up isolated or struggling with mental health issues—not everyone, obviously, but a huge portion of them.

True, but there is a massive distinction between wanting to be different and actually being different. 😉

She never claimed it was an advantage; she was simply describing who she is.

We aren't talking about being "superior" here—that's not what "specialness" means. We're talking about people who simply diverge from the norm in some capacity. It's the same as someone standing out because of a quirky fashion sense, or maybe just having striking eyes.

I wouldn't really go along with that idea.😁
It’s just personality, I guess. Someone prefers a quiet library over a club. Someone prefers mindless small talk about what they ate or who they saw, while someone else would rather hike alone through the woods.🤷 I don't see it as a disorder. To me, the disorder is sitting in some smoky bar, half-deaf from the music, pretending to have fun while some stranger breathes down my neck.🤷 😁

She didn't even say it was an advantage; she was just describing herself.
It's not about being better than anyone else, it's just about people who stand out somehow. Like how some people stand out because of their clothes or because they have nice eyes.

Well, everybody stands out in some way, I suppose.
Maybe it's pretty eyes, maybe it's flaws, charisma, or just the way they walk. I don't really know anyone who is exactly like everyone else.🤷 🤷

Alex Patel96 said:Here we go again. I can already see the types of people who are going to show up here—the ones who get all worked up just because someone else is different, or heaven forbid, actually better than them. It’s always the same story. These people are a thorn in everyone's side, whether it's in real life or right here on this forum.

I'm not sure where you're getting those assumptions from 🤷nobody said being different means being worse. I'm just trying to figure out how to spot that difference compared to the majority. This is a forum, after all, so 🤷what's the point of posting if you can't handle an opinion that isn't your own?🤷
And I don't get why someone would be a thorn in someone else's side just for having virtues or qualities 😕I guess I just don't follow. If you know you're good at something and better than most, why would you care what others think?🙂

I only met someone like that once. Ever get the vibe that people like that just want to bolt the second you try to get close? I could feel this massive wave of sadness coming off them... honestly, it was like they were carrying all the world's pain right there in their eyes😢

She didn't even claim it was some kind of advantage—she's just describing things as they are.
It’s not about being "special" or acting superior to everyone else; it’s just about people who happen to stand out somehow. It's the same way someone stands out because they have a unique sense of style, or maybe just striking eyes.

hiddenhawk3 said:I really can't agree with that.

I didn't say everyone, I said *often*—meaning it's not universal. Not everyone is dealing with a mental disorder.

Well, everyone stands out in some way.🤷

True, but then you have those extreme cases—people who deviate much more significantly from the average person. For instance, if you're familiar with schizoid personalities (zero social contact, not even with close family)... total lone wolves.

But let's move back to the less intense examples. 🙂 You could look at poets or bohemians... types who are just a bit "different."

Take a typical high school classroom in the States, for example. You always have the extroverts and the withdrawn ones. The withdrawn kids are quiet and calm, but if one person doesn't speak to anyone in a class of, say, thirty students, that's already hitting an extreme. Do you see where I'm going with this?
And there's nothing inherently "superior" about it—in fact, most of them probably wish they were different, more outgoing, less shy, or just had a bit more confidence.

hiddenhawk3 said:I mean, fine 😁 I don't know, that's really the only thing you mentioned about being unique 🙂
Yeah, I guess. It’s probably not easy being an introvert these days.

Being an introvert isn't the same thing as being antisocial. Introverts might just prefer their own company or engage in activities that don't require a crowd to feel fulfilled, but that doesn't make them unfriendly.

That’s pretty much what I was thinking, too. I guess 😁 I don't really see myself as "weird" or "special"—I'm just more of a loner. I'd honestly rather be on my own than stuck in bad company 😉. For me, quality definitely beats quantity, so I prefer having just a tiny circle of people I actually care about

I live in a massive US metro area—we're talking four million people here—and honestly, I feel like you rarely run into anyone who actually stands out for being uniquely themselves.
Most of the folks who seem to pop out from the crowd at first glance are either struggling with some kind of internal issue or they're just kids trying to figure out who they are, so they put on this temporary persona just to see how the world reacts... it’s like testing out a costume to see if it fits. Then you've got the ones who are just pathologically obsessed with being the center of attention, but let's be real, those aren't "special" characters either... they aren't truly charismatic people.
...the real deal? There are so few of them... incredibly rare... or maybe I'm just not looking in the right places.

hiddenhawk3 said:I wouldn't really go along with that idea.😁
It’s just personality, I guess. Someone prefers a quiet library over a club. Someone prefers mindless small talk about what they ate or who they saw, while someone else would rather hike alone through the woods.🤷 I don't see it as a disorder. To me, the disorder is sitting in some smoky bar, half-deaf from the music, pretending to have fun while some stranger breathes down my neck.🤷 😁

She didn't even say it was an advantage; she was just describing herself.
It's not about being better than anyone else, it's just about people who stand out somehow. Like how some people stand out because of their clothes or because they have nice eyes.

Well, everybody stands out in some way, I suppose.
Maybe it's pretty eyes, maybe it's flaws, charisma, or just the way they walk. I don't really know anyone who is exactly like everyone else.🤷 🤷

I’ve been sitting here reflecting lately, and I can't help but feel like I don't really stand out from the crowd in any meaningful way. I have my flaws, sure, and I have my virtues, and I definitely hold some pretty firm convictions about certain things, but I struggle to pin down what that one defining characteristic is—that singular thing that truly sets me apart. I’ve actually found myself spiraling into these exact thoughts quite a few times, usually right when I'm standing at a crossroads and need to make a major life decision. It's a frustrating kind of introspection, feeling like you're just a collection of traits without a central identity.

Jessica Cook11 said:I only met someone like that once. Ever get the vibe that people like that just want to bolt the second you try to get close? I could feel this massive wave of sadness coming off them... honestly, it was like they were carrying all the world's pain right there in their eyes😢

I had that exact same feeling when I met someone a while back. There was this unmistakable aura about them—not just one specific trait, but a whole blend of intelligence, artistic sensibility, kindness, and genuine warmth. They just radiated a sense of being "different" in the most profound way. But at the same time, there was this lingering melancholy in their eyes. It was as if they were carrying some heavy, unspoken truth; like looking at a locked door where you can sense something significant is hidden behind it, yet you know deep down you’ll never find the key. What struck me most, though, was their sheer humility. They weren't loud or performative. There was this beautiful lack of pretension, an effortless modesty that made it feel like they weren't even aware of how unique they actually were. They weren't trying to prove anything to anyone, which, in my experience, is the rarest quality of all.

Rebecca Scott3 said:I live in a massive US metro area—we're talking four million people here—and honestly, I feel like you rarely run into anyone who actually stands out for being uniquely themselves.
Most of the folks who seem to pop out from the crowd at first glance are either struggling with some kind of internal issue or they're just kids trying to figure out who they are, so they put on this temporary persona just to see how the world reacts... it’s like testing out a costume to see if it fits. Then you've got the ones who are just pathologically obsessed with being the center of attention, but let's be real, those aren't "special" characters either... they aren't truly charismatic people.
...the real deal? There are so few of them... incredibly rare... or maybe I'm just not looking in the right places.

I honestly don't think the "quantity over quality" argument holds any water here. Then again, we’re diving into such deeply subjective territory that I realize anything I say is just my own personal take on the matter. It’s all opinion at the end of the day, isn't it?
I was venting earlier about that one specific woman, but I’ve recently crossed paths with someone who is the complete polar opposite. This person is genuinely intelligent and possesses a deep, palpable passion for the arts, but there is a fundamental flaw in her character: she isn't quite as "special" as she desperately wants to be. Because she can't quite reach that level of uniqueness she craves, she ends up viewing herself as far inferior to everyone else—which, in my opinion, is a total misconception. It has become this exhausting pattern where, in her frantic pursuit of being seen as an individual, she will spout absolute nonsense just to stand out from the crowd. For instance, imagine we are in a group of twelve people at a dinner party, and eleven of us are having a conversation about how cockroaches are absolutely revolting, slimy creatures. Without missing a beat, she’ll chime in and claim they are actually "sweet and endearing." Now, look, if that were her genuine opinion, I wouldn't say a word. It would be perfectly fine to have a different perspective. But the problem is that she does this in every single discussion, regardless of the topic. She isn't expressing an opinion; she's performing a contrarian act just to ensure all eyes are on her. Honestly, watching that kind of insecurity play out in real-time is just deeply pathetic.

I suppose the importance might be a bit different from others in many cases, so it could perhaps be overrated...

Donna Wood52 said:Have you ever actually crossed paths with someone who just... stands out from the crowd? I mean, sure, we’re all biologically cut from the same cloth—we’ve got limbs, heads, we walk upright, the usual anatomy—but I’m talking about the psychological core, that specific essence of a person's character.

For instance, most people are just... fine. They're decent enough. But then you run into someone whose kindness is almost overwhelming, or maybe they’re incredibly withdrawn—like, pathologically introverted—or perhaps they possess an exceptional beauty, a sharp intellect, or a sense of humor so distinct that everyone in the room is instantly drawn to them. You know exactly what I'm getting at. 🙂

I don't seem to run into people like that very often... 🤷

What’s your take on these types of individuals? Have you ever actually encountered someone like that in your own life?

I knew one such person once, but they've passed away now—rest in peace—and honestly, I think you only encounter someone like that once in a lifetime...

It’s all completely mystical to me ☕—people tell me I’m some kind of global legend, though I haven't quite reached legendary status just yet 😁

Usually, people like that either end up checking themselves into a monastery, joining the priesthood, or winding up in a psychiatric ward.😂

Honestly, special people either have some heavy diagnosis or they're just young and still out there searching for themselves. (That’s what Maria Callas said, and I second that.)

Every single person is unique in their own way, and anyone we get close to becomes special once we actually take the time to know them.

When I was a kid, I totally thought I was this one-of-a-kind, ultra-special phenomenon. But then you start reading books, lyrics, watching movies, and you realize that your "unique" little quirks have already been described a million times over by someone else 😍

It makes you feel kind of bad: ugh, so I'm not actually as special as I thought, but it also feels pretty great: look, there are other people out there just like me, which means I'm not alone or misunderstood. 🎉