Chronic alcoholism

Yeah, fine, call me a chronic alcoholic. It’s been my lifestyle for years now.
I’m not exactly sipping a cocktail at brunch; I’m talking about getting absolutely trashed every single night, all by myself.
I tried using Xanax to take the edge off, but it’s just not working. It numbs me slightly, sure, but I can’t actually fall asleep without slamming a massive dose—and then I just wake up feeling like a zombie the next day because of how late I passed out.
I really need to head out to Napa Valley for some help, but I’m terrified they’re going to force me into a multi-week residential program. I heard there might be an option for daily outpatient check-ins instead, which would be ideal because I start a new job soon and I can't be out of commission.
And Carbamazepine? Total garbage. I take it and still don't even get the urge to throw up.
What are the actual odds that I can just stick to daily "consultations" and avoid being locked up in a facility?
Also, is it even possible for someone who’s been binge drinking for years to scale back to just having a glass of wine with dinner—you know, the good old days—or am I looking at cutting this addiction off at the root?

I’m on Xanax, and obviously, I know I shouldn't mix it with booze, but I have zero self-control right now and I desperately need clinical support.

Am I looking at mandatory rehab? Please, if anyone has experience or advice, hit me up. 🙂

Peter Stewart18 said:Yeah, fine, call me a chronic alcoholic. It’s been my lifestyle for years now.
I’m not exactly sipping a cocktail at brunch; I’m talking about getting absolutely trashed every single night, all by myself.
I tried using Xanax to take the edge off, but it’s just not working. It numbs me slightly, sure, but I can’t actually fall asleep without slamming a massive dose—and then I just wake up feeling like a zombie the next day because of how late I passed out.
I really need to head out to Napa Valley for some help, but I’m terrified they’re going to force me into a multi-week residential program. I heard there might be an option for daily outpatient check-ins instead, which would be ideal because I start a new job soon and I can't be out of commission.
And Carbamazepine? Total garbage. I take it and still don't even get the urge to throw up.
What are the actual odds that I can just stick to daily "consultations" and avoid being locked up in a facility?
Also, is it even possible for someone who’s been binge drinking for years to scale back to just having a glass of wine with dinner—you know, the good old days—or am I looking at cutting this addiction off at the root?

I’m on Xanax, and obviously, I know I shouldn't mix it with booze, but I have zero self-control right now and I desperately need clinical support.

Am I looking at mandatory rehab? Please, if anyone has experience or advice, hit me up. 🙂

Ha, why were you even prescribed Carbamazepine? Usually, it's for epilepsy, neuralgia, or it's used as one of those psych drugs for cocaine addiction.
Stay away from high doses of Xanax; it isn't a sleep aid, and unlike something like Diazepam—which also isn't exactly a "sleeping pill"—it's way more dangerous when you're mixing it with antidepressants and alcohol.
Honestly, you don't stand a chance at quitting alcohol until you truly realize you have to walk away from it for good. And yeah, it seems to me you already know that. You need clinical help, unfortunately, but more than that, you need to find that tiny shred of willpower to commit to the decision. Until you settle that within yourself, even the best clinical support won't do much.😉
You're better off checking yourself into rehab as soon as possible while it's still your choice. It's less painful than being forced into it later, which is exactly where you're heading if things keep going this way.

Peter Stewart18 said:Yeah, fine, call me a chronic alcoholic. It’s been my lifestyle for years now.
I’m not exactly sipping a cocktail at brunch; I’m talking about getting absolutely trashed every single night, all by myself.
I tried using Xanax to take the edge off, but it’s just not working. It numbs me slightly, sure, but I can’t actually fall asleep without slamming a massive dose—and then I just wake up feeling like a zombie the next day because of how late I passed out.
I really need to head out to Napa Valley for some help, but I’m terrified they’re going to force me into a multi-week residential program. I heard there might be an option for daily outpatient check-ins instead, which would be ideal because I start a new job soon and I can't be out of commission.
And Carbamazepine? Total garbage. I take it and still don't even get the urge to throw up.
What are the actual odds that I can just stick to daily "consultations" and avoid being locked up in a facility?
Also, is it even possible for someone who’s been binge drinking for years to scale back to just having a glass of wine with dinner—you know, the good old days—or am I looking at cutting this addiction off at the root?

I’m on Xanax, and obviously, I know I shouldn't mix it with booze, but I have zero self-control right now and I desperately need clinical support.

Am I looking at mandatory rehab? Please, if anyone has experience or advice, hit me up. 🙂

I can't help but look at your situation and break it down. The fact that you’re starting a job soon but still have enough cash to buy top-shelf liquor tells me everything. There’s clearly an outside source funding this "hobby" of yours—someone who probably has no clue they’re actually helping you sink even deeper.

You really need to ask yourself one thing: why are you alone every night? Why is there this massive void in your life that you feel the need to fill with booze instead of doing anything else? Wouldn't it be better to just find a guy? Maybe the same guy every other night, unless there’s some major physical reason why that isn't an option (like being significantly overweight)? 🤷

If you're drinking to the point of passing out, it might prove my point. Fat stores can actually slow down alcohol absorption, meaning you could keep drinking for hours before your brain finally shuts off!👎

Peter Stewart18 said:Yeah, fine, call me a chronic alcoholic. It’s been my lifestyle for years now.
I’m not exactly sipping a cocktail at brunch; I’m talking about getting absolutely trashed every single night, all by myself.
I tried using Xanax to take the edge off, but it’s just not working. It numbs me slightly, sure, but I can’t actually fall asleep without slamming a massive dose—and then I just wake up feeling like a zombie the next day because of how late I passed out.
I really need to head out to Napa Valley for some help, but I’m terrified they’re going to force me into a multi-week residential program. I heard there might be an option for daily outpatient check-ins instead, which would be ideal because I start a new job soon and I can't be out of commission.
And Carbamazepine? Total garbage. I take it and still don't even get the urge to throw up.
What are the actual odds that I can just stick to daily "consultations" and avoid being locked up in a facility?
Also, is it even possible for someone who’s been binge drinking for years to scale back to just having a glass of wine with dinner—you know, the good old days—or am I looking at cutting this addiction off at the root?

I’m on Xanax, and obviously, I know I shouldn't mix it with booze, but I have zero self-control right now and I desperately need clinical support.

Am I looking at mandatory rehab? Please, if anyone has experience or advice, hit me up. 🙂

Try calming down with Tomislav, or Ivica, or... whoever you want your boyfriend to be. After that, you'll sleep like a baby and wake up feeling refreshed, sharp, and ready to crush it at work. 😛

Peter Stewart18 said:Yeah, fine, call me a chronic alcoholic. It’s been my lifestyle for years now.
I’m not exactly sipping a cocktail at brunch; I’m talking about getting absolutely trashed every single night, all by myself.
I tried using Xanax to take the edge off, but it’s just not working. It numbs me slightly, sure, but I can’t actually fall asleep without slamming a massive dose—and then I just wake up feeling like a zombie the next day because of how late I passed out.
I really need to head out to Napa Valley for some help, but I’m terrified they’re going to force me into a multi-week residential program. I heard there might be an option for daily outpatient check-ins instead, which would be ideal because I start a new job soon and I can't be out of commission.
And Carbamazepine? Total garbage. I take it and still don't even get the urge to throw up.
What are the actual odds that I can just stick to daily "consultations" and avoid being locked up in a facility?
Also, is it even possible for someone who’s been binge drinking for years to scale back to just having a glass of wine with dinner—you know, the good old days—or am I looking at cutting this addiction off at the root?

I’m on Xanax, and obviously, I know I shouldn't mix it with booze, but I have zero self-control right now and I desperately need clinical support.

Am I looking at mandatory rehab? Please, if anyone has experience or advice, hit me up. 🙂

If you keep going like this, you're going to get a red card at work. There's no way you'll keep a decent job if it requires any actual focus—unless it's something incredibly basic like being a janitor or a barista. Even those jobs are at risk if you spend several nights in a row getting blackout drunk.

You need to cut off that outside source providing the money that makes you feel "independent." Nothing lasts forever. Think about it. 🙄

(think about trying some natural therapy: start getting active, and I don't mean just hitting the gym—I mean actually getting into a sport you love)

Ronald Rogers27

Ronald Rogers27, her main issue is really the alcohol. Until she gets that under control, she isn't going to get anywhere, even with the best professional help available.

Amanda Stewart7 said:Ha, why were you even prescribed Carbamazepine? Usually, it's for epilepsy, neuralgia, or it's used as one of those psych drugs for cocaine addiction.
Stay away from high doses of Xanax; it isn't a sleep aid, and unlike something like Diazepam—which also isn't exactly a "sleeping pill"—it's way more dangerous when you're mixing it with antidepressants and alcohol.
Honestly, you don't stand a chance at quitting alcohol until you truly realize you have to walk away from it for good. And yeah, it seems to me you already know that. You need clinical help, unfortunately, but more than that, you need to find that tiny shred of willpower to commit to the decision. Until you settle that within yourself, even the best clinical support won't do much.😉
You're better off checking yourself into rehab as soon as possible while it's still your choice. It's less painful than being forced into it later, which is exactly where you're heading if things keep going this way.

I know, but it's also listed as a mood stabilizer—you know, something to steady that emotional rollercoaster of ups and downs you get with bipolar disorder (?)—and it helps deal with alcohol withdrawal. I actually went to see this doctor who turned out to be incredibly unprofessional and just plain ignorant. He kept trying to tell me that alcohol wasn't even the real issue or the main villain in my life, my absolute nightmare, while he’d just write me a script for Radura every six months like it was nothing. It was totally inconsistent and frustrating because I kept insisting I needed it daily just so I could finally stare that crisis in the face and kick that poison out of my system for good.

Ronald Rogers27 said:I can't help but look at your situation and break it down. The fact that you’re starting a job soon but still have enough cash to buy top-shelf liquor tells me everything. There’s clearly an outside source funding this "hobby" of yours—someone who probably has no clue they’re actually helping you sink even deeper.

You really need to ask yourself one thing: why are you alone every night? Why is there this massive void in your life that you feel the need to fill with booze instead of doing anything else? Wouldn't it be better to just find a guy? Maybe the same guy every other night, unless there’s some major physical reason why that isn't an option (like being significantly overweight)? 🤷

If you're drinking to the point of passing out, it might prove my point. Fat stores can actually slow down alcohol absorption, meaning you could keep drinking for hours before your brain finally shuts off!👎

Try calming down with Tomislav, or Ivica, or... whoever you want your boyfriend to be. After that, you'll sleep like a baby and wake up feeling refreshed, sharp, and ready to crush it at work. 😛

If you keep going like this, you're going to get a red card at work. There's no way you'll keep a decent job if it requires any actual focus—unless it's something incredibly basic like being a janitor or a barista. Even those jobs are at risk if you spend several nights in a row getting blackout drunk.

You need to cut off that outside source providing the money that makes you feel "independent." Nothing lasts forever. Think about it. 🙄

(think about trying some natural therapy: start getting active, and I don't mean just hitting the gym—I mean actually getting into a sport you love)

Ronald Rogers27

She went on an absolute tear about it in the thread regarding Borderline Personality Disorder.😉

Amanda Stewart7 said:Ha, why were you even prescribed Carbamazepine? Usually, it's for epilepsy, neuralgia, or it's used as one of those psych drugs for cocaine addiction.
Stay away from high doses of Xanax; it isn't a sleep aid, and unlike something like Diazepam—which also isn't exactly a "sleeping pill"—it's way more dangerous when you're mixing it with antidepressants and alcohol.
Honestly, you don't stand a chance at quitting alcohol until you truly realize you have to walk away from it for good. And yeah, it seems to me you already know that. You need clinical help, unfortunately, but more than that, you need to find that tiny shred of willpower to commit to the decision. Until you settle that within yourself, even the best clinical support won't do much.😉
You're better off checking yourself into rehab as soon as possible while it's still your choice. It's less painful than being forced into it later, which is exactly where you're heading if things keep going this way.

Yeah, I get it. Believe me, I know I have to. Thanks for the reality check. 🙂

Ronald Rogers27 said:I can't help but look at your situation and break it down. The fact that you’re starting a job soon but still have enough cash to buy top-shelf liquor tells me everything. There’s clearly an outside source funding this "hobby" of yours—someone who probably has no clue they’re actually helping you sink even deeper.

You really need to ask yourself one thing: why are you alone every night? Why is there this massive void in your life that you feel the need to fill with booze instead of doing anything else? Wouldn't it be better to just find a guy? Maybe the same guy every other night, unless there’s some major physical reason why that isn't an option (like being significantly overweight)? 🤷

If you're drinking to the point of passing out, it might prove my point. Fat stores can actually slow down alcohol absorption, meaning you could keep drinking for hours before your brain finally shuts off!👎

Try calming down with Tomislav, or Ivica, or... whoever you want your boyfriend to be. After that, you'll sleep like a baby and wake up feeling refreshed, sharp, and ready to crush it at work. 😛

If you keep going like this, you're going to get a red card at work. There's no way you'll keep a decent job if it requires any actual focus—unless it's something incredibly basic like being a janitor or a barista. Even those jobs are at risk if you spend several nights in a row getting blackout drunk.

You need to cut off that outside source providing the money that makes you feel "independent." Nothing lasts forever. Think about it. 🙄

(think about trying some natural therapy: start getting active, and I don't mean just hitting the gym—I mean actually getting into a sport you love)

Ronald Rogers27

😁 Nope, I'm slim—underweight, even. But when you're in a hole like this, even someone with the looks of Helen of Troy would be considered a lost cause. And I don't even go for the fancy stuff; I drink cheap swill. That's actually the biggest problem. 👎 🙂

Amanda Stewart7, thanks. I’ve clearly been lying to myself this whole time. I’ve let things spiral into a total disaster, and if I don't take action right now, I am absolutely going to ruin my life...
The weirdest part is that lately, I actually feel energized being sober when I'm out with people. Paradoxically, even at parties, I’m barely sipping anything and taking my sweet time with it. But the second I get home from a night out? I just start binging alone until I hit full-blown delirium. It sucks.

Peter Stewart18 said:I know, but it's also listed as a mood stabilizer—you know, something to steady that emotional rollercoaster of ups and downs you get with bipolar disorder (?)—and it helps deal with alcohol withdrawal. I actually went to see this doctor who turned out to be incredibly unprofessional and just plain ignorant. He kept trying to tell me that alcohol wasn't even the real issue or the main villain in my life, my absolute nightmare, while he’d just write me a script for Radura every six months like it was nothing. It was totally inconsistent and frustrating because I kept insisting I needed it daily just so I could finally stare that crisis in the face and kick that poison out of my system for good.

Nobody prescribes Radura as a standalone medication unless we're talking about epilepsy or certain types of neuralgia, since it acts as such a potent analgesic. Beyond that, there's a high risk of abuse because taking larger doses can produce an euphoric effect.
That's why he won't give it to you.
There are plenty of different mood stabilizers out there, and they all tend to have a mild euphoric quality. But Radura? Its euphoric potential is way higher than any other stabilizer, which makes it a much riskier option for several reasons.

Amanda Stewart7 said:Nobody prescribes Radura as a standalone medication unless we're talking about epilepsy or certain types of neuralgia, since it acts as such a potent analgesic. Beyond that, there's a high risk of abuse because taking larger doses can produce an euphoric effect.
That's why he won't give it to you.
There are plenty of different mood stabilizers out there, and they all tend to have a mild euphoric quality. But Radura? Its euphoric potential is way higher than any other stabilizer, which makes it a much riskier option for several reasons.

So what about Sanval or other hypnotics?
Years ago, I used to take it just to crash at night, especially when I had to pull an early morning for exams or big meetings at work.
It worked wonders for me back then. Before I had it, I could get through an entire day without a drink just by taking a single Xanax in the afternoon, but after two weeks of using the Sanval, my body just stopped responding to it.
And apparently, you aren't supposed to stay on it long-term because the addiction risk is terrifying. You could find yourself polishing off an entire bottle and suddenly you're in deep trouble.

They aren't meant to be long-term solutions, right?

If you’re actually serious about making a move, your best bet is to reach out to an Alcoholics Anonymous chapter near you. Just pull up Google, search for local meetings, and you'll find all the addresses and contact info you need.
Technically, you can only become a full member once you've completed treatment, but they’ll give you the roadmap and the practical advice you need right now. Since everyone in those rooms has been through that same hell, you'll get support from people who actually understand what you're going through without any judgment.
There are all kinds of people struggling there, so don't go thinking you're some kind of special case.

Peter Stewart18 said:So what about Sanval or other hypnotics?
Years ago, I used to take it just to crash at night, especially when I had to pull an early morning for exams or big meetings at work.
It worked wonders for me back then. Before I had it, I could get through an entire day without a drink just by taking a single Xanax in the afternoon, but after two weeks of using the Sanval, my body just stopped responding to it.
And apparently, you aren't supposed to stay on it long-term because the addiction risk is terrifying. You could find yourself polishing off an entire bottle and suddenly you're in deep trouble.

They aren't meant to be long-term solutions, right?

Samuel is pretty potent and is really only meant for sleeping. Xanax is dangerous because it builds a tolerance and dependency so fast that people don't even notice, which is why psychiatrists often switch patients over to something else.
How any specific med hits you usually comes down to how it interacts with whatever else you're taking.

What you said about Samuel is spot on.

Alright, I’ve got another question that’s been eating me alive:

Once I finally shake this heavy, compulsive binge cycle and get my addiction under control, is there actually any chance that one day I can just enjoy a glass of really nice wine or a cocktail for the pure pleasure of it—without losing my mind and craving more?

And since, in my case, the drinking is basically just a symptom of much deeper issues, if I actually fix those root problems, will the urge to just drown myself in booze disappear forever? Could I eventually get back to sipping a drink elegantly at a happy hour, or am I forced to stay sober forever—like, *forever*? Even a simple, cold beer? Is moderation off the table for good? Just curious...😲

Peter Stewart18 said:Alright, I’ve got another question that’s been eating me alive:

Once I finally shake this heavy, compulsive binge cycle and get my addiction under control, is there actually any chance that one day I can just enjoy a glass of really nice wine or a cocktail for the pure pleasure of it—without losing my mind and craving more?

And since, in my case, the drinking is basically just a symptom of much deeper issues, if I actually fix those root problems, will the urge to just drown myself in booze disappear forever? Could I eventually get back to sipping a drink elegantly at a happy hour, or am I forced to stay sober forever—like, *forever*? Even a simple, cold beer? Is moderation off the table for good? Just curious...😲

Okay, clearly my math here shows I’m not quite ready to go through rehab yet, but yeah, things are pretty rough right now...

Peter Stewart18 said:Okay, clearly my math here shows I’m not quite ready to go through rehab yet, but yeah, things are pretty rough right now...

Peter Stewart18, you aren't—but you should get moving. The sooner you start, the better. It only gets harder down the road.

Peter Stewart18 said:Alright, I’ve got another question that’s been eating me alive:

Once I finally shake this heavy, compulsive binge cycle and get my addiction under control, is there actually any chance that one day I can just enjoy a glass of really nice wine or a cocktail for the pure pleasure of it—without losing my mind and craving more?

And since, in my case, the drinking is basically just a symptom of much deeper issues, if I actually fix those root problems, will the urge to just drown myself in booze disappear forever? Could I eventually get back to sipping a drink elegantly at a happy hour, or am I forced to stay sober forever—like, *forever*? Even a simple, cold beer? Is moderation off the table for good? Just curious...😲

It’s possible, why wouldn't it be? You can find your way back to moderation, but you have to put in the work. And yeah, unfortunately, it’s going to be tough, but there isn't really another way. It all comes down to you.

Peter Stewart18, I honestly think there’s a smart, genuinely likable person buried somewhere under all those layers and endless drama. Do us all a favor and just go get yourself sorted out,😉

Peter Stewart18 said:Yeah, fine, call me a chronic alcoholic. It’s been my lifestyle for years now.
I’m not exactly sipping a cocktail at brunch; I’m talking about getting absolutely trashed every single night, all by myself.
I tried using Xanax to take the edge off, but it’s just not working. It numbs me slightly, sure, but I can’t actually fall asleep without slamming a massive dose—and then I just wake up feeling like a zombie the next day because of how late I passed out.
I really need to head out to Napa Valley for some help, but I’m terrified they’re going to force me into a multi-week residential program. I heard there might be an option for daily outpatient check-ins instead, which would be ideal because I start a new job soon and I can't be out of commission.
And Carbamazepine? Total garbage. I take it and still don't even get the urge to throw up.
What are the actual odds that I can just stick to daily "consultations" and avoid being locked up in a facility?
Also, is it even possible for someone who’s been binge drinking for years to scale back to just having a glass of wine with dinner—you know, the good old days—or am I looking at cutting this addiction off at the root?

I’m on Xanax, and obviously, I know I shouldn't mix it with booze, but I have zero self-control right now and I desperately need clinical support.

Am I looking at mandatory rehab? Please, if anyone has experience or advice, hit me up. 🙂

There is no valid reason to be afraid of Vineyard. Being scared of it is just being scared of learning about yourself and finally tackling the problem.
You’re still the one in the driver's seat when it comes to choosing your path to recovery.
Don't mix pills and booze 😵, because you're just doubling down on the addiction to both.
Your choice boils down to this:😛change immediately or keep stalling, and if you stall, it's only going to get harder.
Forget about "moderate drinking." Your current mental programming is the exact opposite of that.
You need to think long and hard about why you're running from reality.
If you say it's because being wasted feels better... you're lying to yourself.
My experience was forced hospitalization at Vineyard... a long time ago. My life is easier and better now without those attacks. When I first got there, I told them, "Look, I'm a worker, I don't belong in a place like this!" But after two weeks of getting sober, I realized it was a blessing. If I hadn't gone, everything would have gone to hell. So I rolled up my sleeves, and looking back, I'm glad I did. That experience stays with me.
I used to be frustrated and miserable if I went home just tipsy; I wanted to be absolutely trashed... that was my "sweet spot."🤣 ..but honestly, looking back, it seems ridiculous and stupid. Now, I enjoy having a clear head rather than watching the world spin.
So I'm telling you,😍 just go for it. Don't be afraid to change for the better. Along the way, you'll discover plenty of things that bring you more joy than booze ever could.👍