Psychology: Is it all just fluff?

driftingwolf45 said:A value system isn't actually necessary, because if you have one, you'll just try to fit into it, which means living a lie.

Quality isn't necessary either—that’s just another form of valuation. When you decide one thing is higher quality than another, you're basically lying to yourself that it's better.

Just try to remember what you love, what you dream about, what matters to you, or what truly fires you up.

If that happens to be goldfish—then build an aquarium, buy a few fish, get some books, study them, write an article for a website about goldfish, breed them, and start selling them to local pet stores across the US....

In other words—you're the one who gives your dreams meaning and quality, and you're the one who decides what the value system is. A lot of people just can't handle that much freedom.

That is precisely what I do. :-) I despise feeling useless, so I always strive toward something that brings me joy. However, there are periods where I move through life like a ghost. I simply wander around, listless and heavy... until I recover, at which point I can return to any task with my usual focus. During depressive bouts, I lack all willpower and feel constantly on edge... Perhaps worst of all is that I occasionally find a strange comfort in that lethargy, making it quite difficult to emerge from it...

mistybison said:You're alive, so what else is there to ask? 🙂 Do plants or animals ever stop to wonder if they are making the most of the time they have before they fade away? 😉 Humans only differ from our plant and animal friends by the sheer variety of experiences we can encounter. We are more colorful, more complex, and more layered, but the core essence remains identical.

A melancholy thought, yet an honest one...

Angela Morris said:A melancholy thought, yet an honest one...

I wouldn't call it pitiful or sad. 🙂 Once you realize that you might not even be here tomorrow, or that in a year's time nobody will remember you ever existed, you stop obsessing over "goals" and the "quality" of life. You can finally relax and just enjoy whatever comes your way. 🙂
We tend to think happiness comes from checking off a wish list—even though half those desires are just things pushed on us by social media and our surroundings that we never would have wanted on our own. The reality is that you can achieve everything you thought you wanted and still feel just as empty as before. It happens all the time.
True stability has to come from within, providing a foundation even when everything around you falls apart. We shouldn't look for the source of our joy solely through our interactions with the outside world. If you are only happy when you HAVE things (money, love, status...), rather than simply being (just existing), you will never find true contentment. Our entire American culture is outward-facing; we are conditioned to constantly hunt for happiness outside ourselves. Even when we talk about "self-improvement," it’s usually just a way to manipulate ourselves into better meeting external standards—like landing a better job, gaining social status, or finding a partner—or internal goals that are actually just reflections of how we compare ourselves to others. We live under the illusion that inner satisfaction will eventually follow these external achievements. We chase a version of happiness that exists in some distant future. This way of living only leads to a half-hearted sense of fulfillment at best.
The field of psychology should serve to help us understand ourselves more deeply, allowing us to accept and love who we are. 🙂 And by extension, to love others.

Igor Mandić once remarked that psychology is basically just a massive pile of nonsense, and honestly, the more I deal with this stuff, the more I’m convinced he hit the nail on the head. It’s simple math: the more you obsessively analyze your own brain, the more insane you end up feeling. Just stop overthinking your mental state, find something else to occupy your time, and suddenly you won't even have an opinion about yourself anymore. Which, if you ask me, is actually a huge win.👍

Ugh, honestly... the less I know about this stuff, the better I feel!
The original thread starter doesn't really fit here. She’s already covered just about everything...
But still. She asked similar questions, she just didn't reach the same conclusion 😉

I wouldn't go so far as to say psychology is nonsense. It isn't. However, the more you analyze yourselves, the more you'll start feeling like something is fundamentally broken within you (though some people actually interpret it as everything being perfectly fine)
. As for reading those psychology books, you'll find yourself identifying with every second ailment mentioned. You'll convince yourself you have them, even when you don't.
Stay positive. But don't force it. If it doesn't come naturally, just aim for realism. Or consider and both the positive and negative consequences of any given situation. Nothing is ever purely bad. The world isn't black and white; it's gray. Just try to be realistic.
Before you spiral into panic or hysteria, sit down, lean back against something, and count to ten (or use whatever calming method works—slow your breathing, repeat multiples of two, etc.) and think about—or better yet, write down—the actual reasons why you are upset. Then, attempt to find solutions to those worries.
Remember, you are the one responsible for changing yourself. Psychologists and psychiatrists are there to help, guide, offer advice, and talk things through. They calm you down and assist in resolving psychological issues. Some people can handle this alone; others need assistance. Sometimes, taking medication (prescribed by a doctor!) is necessary for recovery.
Change will eventually come. Work on yourself.

There is something truly beautiful about realizing that our minds function perfectly fine whether we pay attention to them or not. Just like the body—filtering blood, processing nutrients, and managing cell regeneration—the mind is constantly gathering sensory data, sorting it, analyzing it, and storing memories. It knows its job. While understanding these biological and psychological processes can certainly help us live more intentional, healthier lives, we aren't actually the ones calling the shots on how our existence operates. Humans have thrived for millennia without even a basic understanding of neurology or physiology. They lived, loved, grieved, celebrated, and simply existed. Isn't there a profound sense of freedom in knowing that we continue to exist quite effortlessly, even when we aren't thinking about ourselves? 🙂

mistybison said:There is something truly beautiful about realizing that our minds function perfectly fine whether we pay attention to them or not. Just like the body—filtering blood, processing nutrients, and managing cell regeneration—the mind is constantly gathering sensory data, sorting it, analyzing it, and storing memories. It knows its job. While understanding these biological and psychological processes can certainly help us live more intentional, healthier lives, we aren't actually the ones calling the shots on how our existence operates. Humans have thrived for millennia without even a basic understanding of neurology or physiology. They lived, loved, grieved, celebrated, and simply existed. Isn't there a profound sense of freedom in knowing that we continue to exist quite effortlessly, even when we aren't thinking about ourselves? 🙂

So, I think it's best to just let those thoughts take a vacation whenever they start feeling like too much to handle............

We'll still be here, existing just fine, while we wait for them to come back... 🙂

Sandra Parker3 said:So, I think it's best to just let those thoughts take a vacation whenever they start feeling like too much to handle............

We'll still be here, existing just fine, while we wait for them to come back... 🙂

I feel like your advice is solid. It applies perfectly to my current situation. I have overwhelmed myself with certain thoughts.
But how does one actually send thoughts on vacation? I need a way to truly rest and recover. Please share some "recipes," you wise people! 😘

It isn’t total garbage, but let’s be clear: it’s hardly a precision instrument like a micrometer 👍 ☕

hollowgardener7 said:I feel like your advice is solid. It applies perfectly to my current situation. I have overwhelmed myself with certain thoughts.
But how does one actually send thoughts on vacation? I need a way to truly rest and recover. Please share some "recipes," you wise people! 😘

Consider the possibility that tomorrow might not come, and that this exact moment is truly all you possess. Whatever happened is already gone; the memories we hold are just our own subjective interpretations, often far removed from the actual truth of what occurred. As for the future—if it’s something you want, you won't summon it through intense worrying, and if it’s something you fear, no amount of endless anxiety will prevent it. Instead, engage the world through your senses. Truly look, listen, and touch the things around you. Don't think about them; simply experience them. Experience yourself experiencing them. Find pleasure in great music, feel the chill of the breeze, or marvel at the subtle shades of blue on a book spine. 😉 That is the only reality you truly have and inhabit. 🙂

The less the mind is burdened by constant analysis and loops of thought, the more open the path to intuition becomes. This is when brilliant ideas tend to surface, often providing instant solutions to our problems. The more we observe, notice, and immerse ourselves in the immediate experience of reality, the more we actually see. Otherwise, we miss so much because the mind is too busy turning inward, obsessing over the same repetitive thoughts. Remember, the mind is always running; overthinking provides no control over ourselves or the world around us. 🙂

mistybison said:Consider the possibility that tomorrow might not come, and that this exact moment is truly all you possess. Whatever happened is already gone; the memories we hold are just our own subjective interpretations, often far removed from the actual truth of what occurred. As for the future—if it’s something you want, you won't summon it through intense worrying, and if it’s something you fear, no amount of endless anxiety will prevent it. Instead, engage the world through your senses. Truly look, listen, and touch the things around you. Don't think about them; simply experience them. Experience yourself experiencing them. Find pleasure in great music, feel the chill of the breeze, or marvel at the subtle shades of blue on a book spine. 😉 That is the only reality you truly have and inhabit. 🙂

The less the mind is burdened by constant analysis and loops of thought, the more open the path to intuition becomes. This is when brilliant ideas tend to surface, often providing instant solutions to our problems. The more we observe, notice, and immerse ourselves in the immediate experience of reality, the more we actually see. Otherwise, we miss so much because the mind is too busy turning inward, obsessing over the same repetitive thoughts. Remember, the mind is always running; overthinking provides no control over ourselves or the world around us. 🙂

😉

mistybison said:Consider the possibility that tomorrow might not come, and that this exact moment is truly all you possess. Whatever happened is already gone; the memories we hold are just our own subjective interpretations, often far removed from the actual truth of what occurred. As for the future—if it’s something you want, you won't summon it through intense worrying, and if it’s something you fear, no amount of endless anxiety will prevent it. Instead, engage the world through your senses. Truly look, listen, and touch the things around you. Don't think about them; simply experience them. Experience yourself experiencing them. Find pleasure in great music, feel the chill of the breeze, or marvel at the subtle shades of blue on a book spine. 😉 That is the only reality you truly have and inhabit. 🙂

The less the mind is burdened by constant analysis and loops of thought, the more open the path to intuition becomes. This is when brilliant ideas tend to surface, often providing instant solutions to our problems. The more we observe, notice, and immerse ourselves in the immediate experience of reality, the more we actually see. Otherwise, we miss so much because the mind is too busy turning inward, obsessing over the same repetitive thoughts. Remember, the mind is always running; overthinking provides no control over ourselves or the world around us. 🙂

Thank you very much. 😘 This is beautiful. Now I can sleep. 🙂 Starting tomorrow, I will attempt to change my approach to life in this manner.

Angela Morris said:So, I actually went to see a psychiatrist recently, though it was regarding a different issue entirely. It was a complete waste of time; she was just doing her own thing, making rude remarks about my perspectives, and seemed solely interested in pushing pills—which I refused. I won't be returning to a psychiatrist again...

What exactly was she rambling about if you don't mind me asking? What kind of comments were they, and how specifically were they "rude"? I once had a friend who constantly made his life situation an issue in that exact way; no matter what you said to him—whether it was constructive advice or anything else—he would twist it into something else entirely. It felt like he was just fishing for attention, and whenever he didn't get enough, he'd spiral into depression. I truly believe the root of it was being an only child of divorced parents and all those other factors...

Jeremy Palmer said:Man, that is a lot of excuses for not taking action.
So many reasons to stay stuck...
It feels like you're using all this philosophy just to mask the real issue, which is simply that you lack the motivation.

Look, if you don't feel like doing it, then don't. No big deal. Just enjoy being passive.
But please—don't try to build a whole philosophical framework around it.
The passivity isn't what's actually bothering you...
it's the constant need to justify it.

There's nothing wrong with just being a sloth.

Hold on, do you honestly believe you've accurately diagnosed my problem based on just a few posts? I think we might be getting a little ahead of ourselves here.

That said, you aren't entirely off base. It's true—I really DON'T feel like doing things that lack any sense of purpose or value to me. But you seem to think that lacking a sense of value is just a convenient excuse for being lazy.

So, how would you define laziness? Why does one person "not feel like" doing something, while another person finds the drive?

mistybison said:You're alive, so what else is there to ask? 🙂 Do plants or animals ever stop to wonder if they are making the most of the time they have before they fade away? 😉 Humans only differ from our plant and animal friends by the sheer variety of experiences we can encounter. We are more colorful, more complex, and more layered, but the core essence remains identical.

Plants and animals don't ask those kinds of questions because they simply lack the intellectual capacity to do so. We humans possess that capacity, which makes such questioning unavoidable.

So, I don't think it's accurate to say humans differ from animals just based on the "variety of experiences." The fundamental gap lies in our ability to reflect—to observe ourselves while we are experiencing things. Animals can experience life, certainly, but they can't be conscious of the experience itself. They react to external stimuli, but they aren't aware of their own awareness. They lack self-consciousness.

Richard Morris43 said:Igor Mandić once remarked that psychology is basically just a massive pile of nonsense, and honestly, the more I deal with this stuff, the more I’m convinced he hit the nail on the head. It’s simple math: the more you obsessively analyze your own brain, the more insane you end up feeling. Just stop overthinking your mental state, find something else to occupy your time, and suddenly you won't even have an opinion about yourself anymore. Which, if you ask me, is actually a huge win.👍

Have you actually been following what Igor Mandić has been saying over this past year or so?

Angela Morris said:This is not an isolated occurrence. Ever since I began studying psychology as a young girl around age twelve or thirteen, consuming books in an attempt to improve myself... I find myself once again losing the will to live. Besides, life lacks inherent meaning...

You'll actually start getting better the moment you learn how to love yourself...

lonegardener said:Hold on, do you honestly believe you've accurately diagnosed my problem based on just a few posts? I think we might be getting a little ahead of ourselves here.

That said, you aren't entirely off base. It's true—I really DON'T feel like doing things that lack any sense of purpose or value to me. But you seem to think that lacking a sense of value is just a convenient excuse for being lazy.

So, how would you define laziness? Why does one person "not feel like" doing something, while another person finds the drive?

Oh, absolutely—that is an excellent question!
It has always rubbed me the wrong way when I was being pushed to tackle tasks that were utterly uninspiring and dull, especially when there were things I actually cared about waiting for me. It’s almost as if people would look at me and ask, "Alex, why on earth do you take on so much busywork?" 🙄

In my view, psychology serves the same role for psychiatry—and medicine at large—that biology or anthropology provides for the medical field. To put it in perspective, you’ll certainly find biologists working within OB-GYN departments, but they aren't acting as the primary gynecologists; rather, they serve as specialized support, perhaps assisting with prenatal screenings or lab work.

By that same logic, I tend to see psychologists as a secondary resource for psychiatrists, primarily stepping in to facilitate specific diagnostic testing.
Beyond that, there is a fundamental distinction in their focus: psychologists often deal with healthy individuals looking to optimize themselves, whereas psychiatrists are much more clinically driven—essentially focused on the direct treatment of mental disorders and pathology.