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@ Noah Sanchez7

Just take a second to really think about the kind of life you could build for yourself. Can you even wrap your head around what that level of success would actually mean for you? Honestly, look at it this way: the harder the climb, the better the view from the top. Per Aspera Ad Astra.

Noah Sanchez7 said:EXACTLY! That's the whole point.

Nick doesn't have the right to be your authority!

And that goes double for drugs.
Drugs shouldn't be your authority and they definitely shouldn't be your priority.

Man, come on, you don't even realize what you're doing to your own head... you're tearing it apart, and I really hope God helps you through this.

mistymoose21 said:@ Noah Sanchez7

Just take a second to really think about the kind of life you could build for yourself. Can you even wrap your head around what that level of success would actually mean for you? Honestly, look at it this way: the harder the climb, the better the view from the top. Per Aspera Ad Astra.

Exactly. That's my goal now, and I'm working on it..

There is no other way.. 👍

dustyhound5 said:And that goes double for drugs.
Drugs shouldn't be your authority and they definitely shouldn't be your priority.

Man, come on, you don't even realize what you're doing to your own head... you're tearing it apart, and I really hope God helps you through this.

When I read what you wrote, my first instinct was to give you a piece of my mind, but I won't.
Let me ask you something: do you actually understand what I'm doing to my consciousness with drugs? Are you speaking from your own experience, or are you just reciting things you heard on the news or saw on some TV show? If you haven't lived it, you have no right to lecture me. But if you have, then that's a different story, and I'll respect your perspective.

I could tell you that old story about the boy whose dad sent him to buy a cow, but he didn't know what one looked like, so everyone tricked him into buying a goat instead...

I'm not taking criticism regarding drugs from anyone unless they've learned something from their own life. That goes for psychologists and psychiatrists, too.

Terry Anderson10 said:😘

How are you doing? 🙂

Noah Sanchez7 said:How are you doing? 🙂

Hey, I'm alright.
Honestly, today was just one massive clusterfuck: my boyfriend is playing games, and at work, it’s nothing but constant complaining about me—this isn't right, that isn't working. Just endless whining.
Everything feels so incredibly messed up right now, I can barely wrap my head around it.
I honestly feel like just disappearing to some remote spot where there isn't a soul in sight. Truly.

How about you? Is things looking any better on your end... mentally speaking? 😉

Terry Anderson10 said:Hey, I'm alright.
Honestly, today was just one massive clusterfuck: my boyfriend is playing games, and at work, it’s nothing but constant complaining about me—this isn't right, that isn't working. Just endless whining.
Everything feels so incredibly messed up right now, I can barely wrap my head around it.
I honestly feel like just disappearing to some remote spot where there isn't a soul in sight. Truly.

How about you? Is things looking any better on your end... mentally speaking? 😉

Things are better on my end. Still, there’s this lingering uncertainty; honestly, I’m not sure about anything anymore.
When you mentioned wanting to go somewhere with no people, maybe that’s exactly where my own conflict lies.

Should I try to dive back into the world, or just disappear somewhere far, far away?

Noah Sanchez7 said:Things are better on my end. Still, there’s this lingering uncertainty; honestly, I’m not sure about anything anymore.
When you mentioned wanting to go somewhere with no people, maybe that’s exactly where my own conflict lies.

Should I try to dive back into the world, or just disappear somewhere far, far away?

Here is how I personally interpret your situation:
Nobody alive interests me, everyone irritates me, I have zero desire to fake a smile for anyone, so I stay serious. I don't trust a soul. I feel alone, sad, misunderstood, and convinced that no one can actually grasp what I'm going through:

That is a brutal feeling, I know...

So, I head out of the city into nature—must be nature—completely solo. I go, I walk, I stop thinking. I am where nobody else is, yet somehow, it feels more real. I just want to get away from people, the acting, and all the damn fakery.

I always feel significantly better afterward.

As for what you said... go far away, but do it in your mind. Don't obsess over the physical distance, because damn it, you're still right here for now.
We ALL have to stay engaged with this world. If we check out, we're all screwed. It is what it is. Just DON'T overthink it—which seems to be exactly what you're doing—otherwise, you'll never find your footing.
Try the nature thing. Walk. Exhaust yourself. Be alone (though you aren't truly alone), and STOP thinking. Give your brain a rest, for God's sake. I don't even know how to explain it to you.

What is actually bothering you most? The state of the world? Forget them. All of them. Every single one of us—you, me, every individual—lives strictly for themselves.
Stop carrying the weight of the world. Turn that focus inward instead.

Terry Anderson10 said:Here is how I personally interpret your situation:
Nobody alive interests me, everyone irritates me, I have zero desire to fake a smile for anyone, so I stay serious. I don't trust a soul. I feel alone, sad, misunderstood, and convinced that no one can actually grasp what I'm going through:

That is a brutal feeling, I know...

So, I head out of the city into nature—must be nature—completely solo. I go, I walk, I stop thinking. I am where nobody else is, yet somehow, it feels more real. I just want to get away from people, the acting, and all the damn fakery.

I always feel significantly better afterward.

As for what you said... go far away, but do it in your mind. Don't obsess over the physical distance, because damn it, you're still right here for now.
We ALL have to stay engaged with this world. If we check out, we're all screwed. It is what it is. Just DON'T overthink it—which seems to be exactly what you're doing—otherwise, you'll never find your footing.
Try the nature thing. Walk. Exhaust yourself. Be alone (though you aren't truly alone), and STOP thinking. Give your brain a rest, for God's sake. I don't even know how to explain it to you.

What is actually bothering you most? The state of the world? Forget them. All of them. Every single one of us—you, me, every individual—lives strictly for themselves.
Stop carrying the weight of the world. Turn that focus inward instead.

🙂

I think you've hit on the core of the issue. The question is why the world is set up such that you end up just exhausting yourself within it.
Why is it structured this way? Maybe I know the answer, but I still find myself asking why..

To be honest, I didn't "plan" to come to this world just to suffer and struggle and look at images every day that I don't want to see.. I wonder who is behind it?
So why is everything like this..

And yeah, I'm currently in my third year of college (studying business administration 😍 — seems fitting) and I'll be starting my fourth soon, which I'll finish too. Don't ask me why I enrolled...
Once I'm done, I think I'll finally have the choice: whether to stay in this turbulent chaos—which isn't actually all bad, if you ignore the "fake smiles"—or to climb some mountain, maybe move somewhere near the coast or even to Jamaica or something, and just enjoy myself and nature...

I could even carry on the species there, in whatever way I feel is right, if not...

In truth, is continuing the species a human, biological, natural (not moral!) obligation?

Noah Sanchez7 said:You all seem so strong, driven by this relentless willpower. I’m not built like that; I'm soft, a coward who runs from reality instead of facing it head-on.
Do I even deserve to live this way?
Do I have a right to my drugs?
And why is this considered hurting my family?
This is just who I am—I'm a contrarian, refusing to follow the path everyone else takes..

You have the freedom to choose any life you want, provided you aren't hurting anyone else—though I suspect watching you self-destruct will be hell on your parents.

People aren't strong. Most are just putting on a show.

Morgan Hernandez said:You have the freedom to choose any life you want, provided you aren't hurting anyone else—though I suspect watching you self-destruct will be hell on your parents.

People aren't strong. Most are just putting on a show.

But I'm not hurting them. I'm only hurting myself.

Hey.🙂

Here is a bit of well-intentioned advice—the kind you’d usually get from a fortune teller on a street corner—but I feel compelled to reiterate it because, frankly, I think you brushed it off far too quickly.

I suspect it wouldn't just be a good idea for you to go volunteer somewhere... it would be an absolute stroke of genius.
Personally, I’m advocating for the establishment of a dedicated facility for abandoned and neglected children.
Believe me, if you actually follow through with that, you won't find yourself constantly questioning the meaning of life and everything else quite so often.
You want to understand what it truly means to be lost? To feel like life has just trampled you underfoot? Or to find yourself staring at the world and wondering, "Where did the humanity go?"
Just imagine what those kids would offer if they were given even a shred of attention or affection... just a tiny bit... nothing more. I truly believe that if you did, all those existential questions of yours about the meaning of life and such would be answered instantly. Or, at the very least, you'd finally realize they don't actually require nearly as much of your focus as you seem to think.

Beyond all that, I think you’d find some extra motivation to quit if you realized the reality of the situation: most of the kids there are just children of addicts. They're told they were "only left alone for a few months until their parents got clean." Yeah, right. Sure.

Well, I certainly hope you give it a shot at least once.

Greetings.😘

Noah Sanchez7 said:But I'm not hurting them. I'm only hurting myself.

Well, it isn't quite as if your mother gave birth to you just so you could wander aimlessly through life without a care. Do you honestly think she won't feel the fallout too?!🙂div>

northernsailor said:Hey.🙂

Here is a bit of well-intentioned advice—the kind you’d usually get from a fortune teller on a street corner—but I feel compelled to reiterate it because, frankly, I think you brushed it off far too quickly.

I suspect it wouldn't just be a good idea for you to go volunteer somewhere... it would be an absolute stroke of genius.
Personally, I’m advocating for the establishment of a dedicated facility for abandoned and neglected children.
Believe me, if you actually follow through with that, you won't find yourself constantly questioning the meaning of life and everything else quite so often.
You want to understand what it truly means to be lost? To feel like life has just trampled you underfoot? Or to find yourself staring at the world and wondering, "Where did the humanity go?"
Just imagine what those kids would offer if they were given even a shred of attention or affection... just a tiny bit... nothing more. I truly believe that if you did, all those existential questions of yours about the meaning of life and such would be answered instantly. Or, at the very least, you'd finally realize they don't actually require nearly as much of your focus as you seem to think.

Beyond all that, I think you’d find some extra motivation to quit if you realized the reality of the situation: most of the kids there are just children of addicts. They're told they were "only left alone for a few months until their parents got clean." Yeah, right. Sure.

Well, I certainly hope you give it a shot at least once.

Greetings.😘

You aren't the first person to suggest that to me, and it had crossed my mind too.
I don't think there's anything like that in my small town, but maybe I'll head over to New York City to find something.
People have suggested things like that for my own therapy.
And I figure doing that helps build up some good karma, which is really important and something I definitely need more of.
Thanks for the advice..

And you know what, all sorts of ideas like that have popped into my head. Money isn't the issue. But then I remember I'd need a visa and all that other nonsense.
It's just one more thing for you guys to throw at us with these visa requirements, great job.
I realized I'm literally trapped in a 300-mile radius of 311 miles. It's creepy!

I'll find something like that if I don't end up working at the car wash (my neighbor is opening one soon)... That counts as therapy too.. washing cars all day 🙄

love ya

northernsailor said:Well, it isn't quite as if your mother gave birth to you just so you could wander aimlessly through life without a care. Do you honestly think she won't feel the fallout too?!🙂div>

Well, that’s more of a philosophical question, really. I mean, she is who she is, and I am who I am. If she decides she wants to—or if she's just happy to—knock back half a liter of moonshine every single day, there isn't much I can do about it.

And vice versa, naturally..

Noah Sanchez7 said:When I read what you wrote, my first instinct was to give you a piece of my mind, but I won't.
Let me ask you something: do you actually understand what I'm doing to my consciousness with drugs? Are you speaking from your own experience, or are you just reciting things you heard on the news or saw on some TV show? If you haven't lived it, you have no right to lecture me. But if you have, then that's a different story, and I'll respect your perspective.

I could tell you that old story about the boy whose dad sent him to buy a cow, but he didn't know what one looked like, so everyone tricked him into buying a goat instead...

I'm not taking criticism regarding drugs from anyone unless they've learned something from their own life. That goes for psychologists and psychiatrists, too.

The fools learn from their own mistakes, while the smart ones learn from everyone else's, right?
Don't take it personally, but I don't need to start lighting up cigarettes just to realize I'm wrecking my lungs, do I?

Anyway, I actually know a few former users personally. They were hardcore addicts, man. It's honestly a miracle they made it out. Now they're just trying to live normal lives—grinding through college, looking for steady jobs, all that stuff.
Some of them picked up the Hepatitis C virus, and their health just isn't what it used to be before they started using. Their brains don't quite fire on all cylinders like they did before, either. Drugs wreck your brain; you know that much.

dustyhound5 said:The fools learn from their own mistakes, while the smart ones learn from everyone else's, right?
Don't take it personally, but I don't need to start lighting up cigarettes just to realize I'm wrecking my lungs, do I?

Anyway, I actually know a few former users personally. They were hardcore addicts, man. It's honestly a miracle they made it out. Now they're just trying to live normal lives—grinding through college, looking for steady jobs, all that stuff.
Some of them picked up the Hepatitis C virus, and their health just isn't what it used to be before they started using. Their brains don't quite fire on all cylinders like they did before, either. Drugs wreck your brain; you know that much.

That's about the dumbest thing I've ever heard...😲

Please don't be offended.

Noah Sanchez7 said:That's about the dumbest thing I've ever heard...😲

Please don't be offended.

Heh...😁

It’s just an old American proverb, you know? I'm totally being serious here.

dustyhound5 said:Heh...😁

It’s just an old American proverb, you know? I'm totally being serious here.

Forget about society; you learn best from your own mistakes..👍