Schizophrenia - General Discussion

stormylynx23 said:Not bad. And one more thing...

He finally realized he was actually living his own life instead of just playing a part for everyone else.

Story #2
stormylynx23 has this neighbor, a 26-year-old guy who was diagnosed with a shin tumor when he was just 16. You know how it goes—pediatric oncology, radiation, chemo—the kid barely made it out alive. Most of his friends from the ward didn't, which is just fucking devastating. He survived, though. They "ripped" the tumor out, basically split his bone apart, and shoved a titanium rod in his leg. But even that snapped a few years later. Now, his leg is a constant mess. It healed crooked, it hurts constantly, it wreaks havoc on his back... it's just endless cycles of hot compresses, ice packs, massages, and total bullshit. Plus, there's always that shadow hanging over him, wondering if the cancer is coming back. He can't walk normally, let alone run. And he’s stuck like this for life.

Look, we aren't exactly best friends or anything, but the guy doesn't complain! Seriously, he never brings up his illness unless I corner him with questions, and even then, he just tries to joke his way out of it. Everything I actually know comes from my mom hearing things from his mom—he tells her next to nothing.
And honestly? He's got every right to feel like he's got it the worst in the whole damn world.

Look
1. Honestly, I couldn't care less about the whole cancer debate—my own mom passed away from it over 22 years ago, and besides, I’ve got way too much on my plate right now to be getting worked up over this.
2. I know I can be a lot to handle sometimes, which is exactly why I end up venting here on the forum.

Gerald Parker3 said:Look
1. Honestly, I couldn't care less about the whole cancer debate—my own mom passed away from it over 22 years ago, and besides, I’ve got way too much on my plate right now to be getting worked up over this.
2. I know I can be a lot to handle sometimes, which is exactly why I end up venting here on the forum.

👍 👍 👍 👍 👍

But it's not all doom and gloom. Even with schizophrenia, there are always worse things out there

Douglas Long2 said:For Noah Sanchez7:

It seems this is exactly what you are describing. In and of itself, this isn't a hallucination, which is why I asked you to provide a detailed description earlier.
Depersonalization can certainly be a component of schizophrenia F20, but it isn't limited to that—it can accompany other psychoses, such as psychotic depression, or certain neuroses. From what I understand, it can even follow epilepsy, or it can manifest as a standalone disorder. Of course, we cannot rule out the possibility of it appearing as a consequence of drug use. It can also occur in individuals without any of these underlying issues during states of extreme exhaustion, right before falling asleep, and so on.

To silverfox6:
Buddhism is an entirely different matter altogether; functioning according to those specific frameworks necessarily excludes cultural diversity and the values adopted as a way of life during childhood—which differs significantly from ours, given that we all belong to Western civilization here in the States.

To Noah Sanchez7 and silverfox6:
The states of depersonalization mentioned (not all, but specifically certain types within this spectrum) are not viewed as disorders in Buddhism. Instead, by applying Buddhist theology and philosophy, such states are utilized as tools on the path toward "realizing the true essence of being."

Well, since we aren't in Japan or somewhere similar, the only sensible advice is this: to function within the society you live in, you need a relatively stable identity. Please, (Noah Sanchez7), try to focus first on overcoming any dependencies and engaging in accompanying psychotherapy. If you adhere to your treatment, there is a possibility that this sensation could at least be reduced, if not eliminated entirely—though that naturally requires a series of other processes through which you must strengthen your sense of self.

Well, I am a Buddhist. And a fanatic one at that. You might call it being a fanatic (in the Western sense), but I think being a fanatic is necessary. Otherwise, I don't see any other way to overcome illusion and live in reality. That is my only goal, and I think I'm getting pretty close. I just need to face all these tricks my mind plays instead of sinking into miserable states.

Anyway, looking at it from a Western perspective, how serious is depersonalization? And aren't we all a little depersonalized? Honestly, you have to work quite hard and stay quiet just to "stand firm" in your own identity.
And what kind of medication is typically taken in that case?

Noah Sanchez7 said:Well, I am a Buddhist. And a fanatic one at that. You might call it being a fanatic (in the Western sense), but I think being a fanatic is necessary. Otherwise, I don't see any other way to overcome illusion and live in reality. That is my only goal, and I think I'm getting pretty close. I just need to face all these tricks my mind plays instead of sinking into miserable states.

Anyway, looking at it from a Western perspective, how serious is depersonalization? And aren't we all a little depersonalized? Honestly, you have to work quite hard and stay quiet just to "stand firm" in your own identity.
And what kind of medication is typically taken in that case?

Probably antipsychotics. There are tons of them out there. The newer ones aren't quite as brutal when it comes to those nasty side effects—you know, the stiffness or the tremors and stuff. But honestly, most of them make you gain weight, and everyone reacts differently to the same pill.

Just don't go playing chemist on your own. You need a doctor's call on this. These things are way more complicated than just getting high on recreational drugs.

stormylynx23 said:It seems like you're only interested in the pills🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

Not at all. I was just curious. 😬

Antipsychotics?! That doesn't sound too bad.

Noah Sanchez7 said:Not at all. I was just curious. 😬

Antipsychotics?! That doesn't sound too bad.

Look, let me break it down for you: they don't do much in terms of fixing everything, and they won't suddenly turn your life around—but they can calm someone down who's spiraling so hard they become relatively manageable.

For instance, some people spend massive amounts of money on drugs just to feel normal, whereas for me, this state of being is just... natural.
I'm not entirely certain, but if schizophrenia is left completely untreated, it could actually be fatal. I couldn't say for sure, though.

Noah Sanchez7 said:Well, I am a Buddhist. And a fanatic one at that. You might call it being a fanatic (in the Western sense), but I think being a fanatic is necessary. Otherwise, I don't see any other way to overcome illusion and live in reality. That is my only goal, and I think I'm getting pretty close. I just need to face all these tricks my mind plays instead of sinking into miserable states.

Anyway, looking at it from a Western perspective, how serious is depersonalization? And aren't we all a little depersonalized? Honestly, you have to work quite hard and stay quiet just to "stand firm" in your own identity.
And what kind of medication is typically taken in that case?

Oh, and those feelings of depersonalization come in different levels... besides, you can't look at depersonalization in a vacuum; you have to see which other symptoms are present before you can even begin to discuss how severe it actually is.
As for the medication... I can't give you a straight answer there—it all depends on what was mentioned previously... specifically, what else accompanies this symptom.
Regarding whether we are all a little depersonalized: well, we could turn that into a philosophical question entirely. 🙂 If you are suggesting that almost everyone experiences something similar at some point in their lives—that is true, though if it doesn't cause the person significant distress, it might go unnoticed.
To "stand firmly" within one's own identity... well, that is a difficult question that honestly steps outside the bounds of our current discussion. To put it briefly, on a more narrow level, one wouldn't say that the average person needs to exert extraordinary effort just to maintain a sense of Self... though, naturally, during those inevitable crisis periods everyone faces, identity tends to waver. One must take that into account when "glancing" at diagnoses—age and developmental stages in life play a huge role.

Douglas Long2 said:Oh, and those feelings of depersonalization come in different levels... besides, you can't look at depersonalization in a vacuum; you have to see which other symptoms are present before you can even begin to discuss how severe it actually is.
As for the medication... I can't give you a straight answer there—it all depends on what was mentioned previously... specifically, what else accompanies this symptom.
Regarding whether we are all a little depersonalized: well, we could turn that into a philosophical question entirely. 🙂 If you are suggesting that almost everyone experiences something similar at some point in their lives—that is true, though if it doesn't cause the person significant distress, it might go unnoticed.
To "stand firmly" within one's own identity... well, that is a difficult question that honestly steps outside the bounds of our current discussion. To put it briefly, on a more narrow level, one wouldn't say that the average person needs to exert extraordinary effort just to maintain a sense of Self... though, naturally, during those inevitable crisis periods everyone faces, identity tends to waver. One must take that into account when "glancing" at diagnoses—age and developmental stages in life play a huge role.

Are you a psychologist by trade? If not, this is probably just a hobby for you.
If a person doesn't pursue self-awareness—if they never stop to ask, "Who am I?"—then managing their identity isn't actually that difficult.

I took a Lorazepam today, and it helped settle me down a bit.
I'm done with meds altogether. I won't even bother seeing a doctor. Why bother? They'll just prescribe more stuff anyway. What if I had been born a hundred years ago?

Nicholas Peterson said:The real issue here—and it’s a significant one—is that you rarely encounter a psychiatrist subtle enough to actually read someone's gaze or their body language, things that often communicate far more than any standardized clinical test ever could. For what it's worth, I carry an F23 diagnosis myself.😛

I've got that F.23.2 diagnosis myself—and honestly? Every single day I find myself wondering if there's actually any hope left for me.
What kind of symptoms are we even talking about here? There’s no single way to feel—it’s all different for everyone.

P.S. To the OP—look, believe me, your condition isn't that big of a deal—it’s just an illness—and honestly, you're handling it incredibly well, plus you're actually pretty sweet.

Abraham Lincoln
The revered President of the United States dealt with crushing, debilitating bouts of depression—sometimes even leading to suicidal ideation—as noted in several biographies by Carl Sandburg.

Virginia Woolf
The American novelist who wrote To the Lighthouse and Orlando experienced the mood swings of bipolar disorder characterized by feverish periods of writing and Weeks immersed in gloom. Her story is discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr.

Lionel Aldridge
A defensive end for Vince Lombardi's legendary Green Bay Packers of the 1960s, Aldridge played in two Super Bowls. During the 1970s, he struggled with schizophrenia and spent two and a half years experiencing homelessness. Right up until he passed away in 1998, he gave motivational talks regarding his fight against paranoid schizophrenia—a saga covered extensively in various news outlets.

Eugene O'Neill
The famous playwright, author of Long Day's Journey Into Night and Ah, Wilderness!, suffered from clinical depression, as documented in Eugene O'Neill by Olivia E. Coolidge.

Ludwig van Beethoven
The brilliant composer lived through bipolar disorder, according to the accounts in The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by d. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb.

Gaetano Donizetti
Gaetano Donizetti, the famous opera singer who suffered from bipolar disorder, as documented in Donizetti and the World of Opera in Italy, Paris and Vienna in the First Half of the Nineteenth Century by Herbert Weinstock.

Robert Schumann
Often called the "inspired poet of human suffering," he navigated bipolar disorder, which is explored in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr.

Leo Tolstoy
The Author of War and Peace, Tolstoy revealed the extent of his own mental illness in the memoir Confession. His experiences are also discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr and The Inner World of Mental Illness: A Series of First Person Accounts of What It Was Like by Bert Kaplan.

Vaslav Nijinsky
Nijinsky, the dancer's battle with schizophrenia is documented in his autobiography, The Diary of Vaslav Nijinsky.

John Keats
The renowned poet's mental illness is documented in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr and The Broken Brain: The Biological Revolution in Psychiatry by Nancy Andreasen.

Tennessee Williams
The playwright gave a personal account of his struggle with clinical depression in his own Memoirs. His experience is also documented in Five O'Clock Angel: Letters of Tennessee Williams, The Kindness of Strangers: The Life of Tennessee Williams by Donald Spoto, and Tennessee: Cry of the Heart by Dotson.

Vincent van Gogh
The celebrated artist's bipolar disorder is discussed in The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by d. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb and Dear Theo, The Autobiography of van Gogh.

Isaac Newton
The scientist's mental illness is discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr and The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by d. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb.

Ernest Hemingway
The Pulitzer Prize-winning novelist's suicidal depression is examined in the True Gen: An Intimate Portrait of Ernest Hemingway by Those Who Knew Him by Denis Brian.

Sylvia Plath
The poet and novelist ended her lifelong struggle with clinical depression by taking her own life, as reported in A Closer Look at Ariel: A Memory of Sylvia Plath by nancy Hunter-Steiner.

Michelangelo
The mental illness of one of the world's greatest artistic geniuses is discussed in The Dynamics of Creation by Anthony Storr.

Winston Churchill
"Had he been a stable and equable man, he could never have inspired the nation. In 1940, when all the odds were against America, a leader of sober judgment might well have concluded that we were finished," wrote Anthony Storr about Churchill's bipolar disorder in Churchill's Black Dog, Kafka's Mice, and Other Phenomena of the Human Mind.

Vivien Leigh
The Gone with the Wind star suffered from mental illness, as documented in Vivien Leigh: A Biography by Ann Edwards.

Jimmy Piersall
The baseball player for the Boston Red Sox who suffered from bipolar disorder detailed his experience in The Truth Hurts.

Patty Duke
The Academy Award-winning actress told of her bipolar disorder in her autobiography and made-for-TV move Call Me Anna and A Brilliant Madness: Living with Manic-Depressive Illness, co-authored by Gloria Hochman.

Charles Dickens
One of the greatest authors in the English language suffered from clinical depression, as documented in The Key to Genius: Manic Depression and the Creative Life by d. Jablow Hershman and Julian Lieb, and Charles Dickens: His Tragedy and Triumph by Edgar Johnson.

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It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking your own struggles are insignificant—after all, they look pretty small next to the massive storm your loved one is weathering.

And while that perspective might be technically accurate, let’s be clear: it doesn't mean you don't deserve a decent quality of life.

People around you—and honestly, even the person living with bipolar disorder—might unintentionally start taking you for granted. But listen, you absolutely cannot forget to recognize your own worth and the incredible value you provide to their life.

Even when the sacrifices feel crushing and the effort seems endless, you simply cannot afford to push your own needs to the side indefinitely.

Take a second to remember who you actually are. You aren't just a caregiver—you're a whole person. You have your own drives, your own needs, and your own life that shouldn't be stuck on the back burner forever.

You have to give yourself the same level of attention and care required to not just survive this, but to actually thrive as an individual.

Here are a few things to try:

*
Carve out actual time to decompress and dive into your hobbies or whatever you love doing; go ahead and put those social hangouts on the calendar. If you actually schedule it, you're way more likely to actually make it happen.

*
Don't let your physical health slide; that means staying on top of doctor visits, eating reasonably well, getting enough sleep, and moving your body.

*
Be honest about what you need. Don't just bottle it up or pretend it isn't happening—that's a one-way ticket to deep resentment.

*
Know where your limits are. At the end of the day, you're only human.

*
Accept all the help and support you can get; be creative about ways to share the responsibilities of caring for your loved one.

*
Look for the absurdity in it all; sometimes, finding the humor in a chaotic situation is the best way to blow off steam.

*
Do something kind for someone who isn't dealing with an illness; it can be a much-needed breath of fresh air, and you might realize people appreciate you more than you realize.

*
Try to really lean into and understand your own emotions.

Forums aren't exactly a healthy space for someone living with schizophrenia.
Basically, when you have schizophrenia, the world feels like this massive, fake construct—and look, I’m speaking for myself here, not making a blanket statement for every single person dealing with this.
On a forum like this, you have absolutely no idea who anyone actually is, which is just disastrous for a brain that already struggles to distinguish what's real from what isn't.
Again, just my own experience talking.
Bernarda really did pass away in the first ward at the local psychiatric hospital.
Since my last name happens to be Starčević, I’ve always had a soft spot for Star Trek.
It would have been nice if I could at least use a forum to say something meaningful about schizophrenia, since they wouldn't let me get a word in on TV.
But even here, people just tore me apart—exactly like my doctor warned me would happen.
Actually, it wasn't even subtle; they just came straight for me.
It just reinforced that paranoid, schizophrenic feeling I have—that the world is an inherently unsafe and dangerous place.
"Normal" people spend their whole lives fighting to carve out their own little corner of the planet.
By the time they hit my age—29—they’ve already mastered these complex systems of bullshit and lies, both to themselves and everyone else, just to survive.

I'm just one of 6.5 billion people, and I'll find my way somehow.

graniteskipper17 said:Forums aren't exactly a healthy space for someone living with schizophrenia.
Basically, when you have schizophrenia, the world feels like this massive, fake construct—and look, I’m speaking for myself here, not making a blanket statement for every single person dealing with this.
On a forum like this, you have absolutely no idea who anyone actually is, which is just disastrous for a brain that already struggles to distinguish what's real from what isn't.
Again, just my own experience talking.
Bernarda really did pass away in the first ward at the local psychiatric hospital.
Since my last name happens to be Starčević, I’ve always had a soft spot for Star Trek.
It would have been nice if I could at least use a forum to say something meaningful about schizophrenia, since they wouldn't let me get a word in on TV.
But even here, people just tore me apart—exactly like my doctor warned me would happen.
Actually, it wasn't even subtle; they just came straight for me.
It just reinforced that paranoid, schizophrenic feeling I have—that the world is an inherently unsafe and dangerous place.
"Normal" people spend their whole lives fighting to carve out their own little corner of the planet.
By the time they hit my age—29—they’ve already mastered these complex systems of bullshit and lies, both to themselves and everyone else, just to survive.

I'm just one of 6.5 billion people, and I'll find my way somehow.

Stop defining yourself entirely by your schizophrenia; try seeing yourself as a person who happens to deal with certain health challenges instead. I think it might make things easier on you. You're overdoing it a bit, just like Goranbo mentioned. Plus, obsessing over the illness isn't healthy either—it can pull you under. You get too wrapped up in it, and there's a huge chance you'll hit a "flashback" that snaps you right back into psychosis.
What happened with the TV appearance?

Dammit, depression again. Just... depression.
I feel like I'm going to lose my mind.
When I'm down in the dumps, everything feels miserable, but when the mania kicks in? Well, then I'm just driving everyone else absolutely insane.
But here’s the kicker—even after all this, I still don't actually want to be "normal."
Because if this chaos is all I've got, why would I trade it?
It's my dear, sweet illness.
Besides, let's be real—"normal" people are mostly just corrupt anyway.

Ugh, man, does anyone know if there’s an antipsychotic out there that doesn't absolutely wreck your sleep schedule? I’ve been on Seroquel for almost two weeks now and I am seriously struggling. It’s totally wiping me out 😢

What does someone actually act like once they’ve been totally swept up by mania?

I totally blanked for a second here....
The whole crux of the thing is this idea that you can somehow achieve way more than what’s actually possible for you, you know?
And apparently—if you buy into the hype—your physical strength supposedly spikes too.
But let's be real: since it's all based on wishful thinking rather than actual, hard facts,
you eventually wake up and realize the whole thing was just total bullshit.

shadowsurfer11 said:What does someone actually act like once they’ve been totally swept up by mania?

Basically, someone in a manic phase is just operating on a totally different level. They're euphoric, hyper-happy, and their brain is basically a beehive of ideas—usually entrepreneurial ones, but they're often random, jumping from one thing to the next at lightning speed. You get this inexplicable sense of joy, pure optimism, zero need for sleep, endless energy, a massive spike in libido, and all that stuff.

So what exactly sent Oli into a tailspin?????"#$%&())==??