What drives a person toward self-sabotage?

Fear?

Disgust?

A sense of inadequacy?

Maybe just a way to fish for compliments? (reverse psychology)

Imbalance?

Anxiety?

Corruption?

Immaturity?

Sadness?

vision

rustyfalcon52 said:vision

television
is pure evil, I'm telling you😈

Telemarketing... there's a certain devilry to it, especially when they try to sell you things you don't need via those junk mailers. 👍 😂

Nikol said:feeling worthless

👍

A total lack of self-respect.
Self-esteem is something your family either provides or fails to provide.
And since most families are just fundamentally psychotic clusters of dysfunction...

Alex Rogers96 said:A total lack of self-respect.
Self-respect is something your family either gives you or they don't.
And since most families are just a bunch of dysfunctional psychos, that's usually a losing game.

I'm with you on this one. 😁

Alex Rogers96 said:A total lack of self-respect.
Self-respect is either something your family hands you or they don't.
And since most families are basically just a psychotic collection of broken math, that's usually the problem.

The truth is, nobody just "gives" you self-respect. You build it yourself based on how you actually see yourself—an image shaped by your wins, what you've learned, and a whole mess of other factors.
We can't exactly pin everything on our families, can we? I mean, sure, they matter, but they aren't the end-all, be-all.

Family dynamics during childhood breed frustrations and all sorts of other bullshit.
Later on, those patterns just get reinforced...
You can easily see how a family 'breathes' by looking at their child.

It’s during those formative years at home that all the frustrations—and, frankly, all the other bullshit—really start to brew.
Later on, life just serves to validate and lock those patterns in place.
If you look closely enough at a child, you can practically see the family dynamic "breathing" right through them.

I actually heard some psychiatrist mention that exact point on TV the other day.

Alex Rogers96 said:Growing up in a family is basically just a breeding ground for frustrations and all sorts of other bullshit.
Later on, you’re just reinforcing those patterns.
If you look at a kid, you can easily see the exact atmosphere they're breathing in from their family.

But then there’s this thing called defiance. Once you actually grow up—and let's be honest, that happens whenever it happens, whether you hit maturity at 15 or 50 😁—you stop putting up with any kind of humiliation, especially when it comes to degrading yourself.

To me, they’re just slimy little "cyclists." (You know, the type who stare at the ground while everyone else is bending over)
And don't get it twisted—it's not even about coming from broken homes. You can find them in every single corner of society.

Maybe what feels like self-deprecation to you isn't even that to someone else. I've run into plenty of people who see just being honest about themselves as humiliating—mostly because they're ashamed... or they're the type who think it's perfectly fine to let society dictate how you act, viewing any actual independence as some kind of pathetic ego trip.

Charles Taylor10 said:Maybe what looks like self-deprecation to you isn't actually that to someone else. I've run into plenty of people who find even basic self-disclosure humiliating because they're just ashamed of who they are. Or, on the flip side, there are those who think it's perfectly fine to let social pressure dictate your every move—people who view true independence and doing exactly what you want as some kind of pathetic surrender.

😕
Care to elaborate? Your logic feels a bit circular to me.

I can't really make you see it if you just don't get it—it’s one of those things. All I was trying to say is this: what looks like self-humiliation to one person might actually feel like self-fulfillment to someone else.

Charles Taylor10 said:... they think it's beneath them to care what anyone else thinks or to do anything other than exactly what they want.

😕 Come on, at least explain that part.

Are suck-ups actually okay? And isn't it more about self-humiliation when you have to speak up in front of everyone rather than just doing it behind closed doors?
Come on, Pitti.

Harold Adams5 said:😕 come on, at least explain this part

Look, for instance—I don't bother talking to people I know are just jealous or gossiping about me... some might call that being a pushover (I know plenty of those types), but it doesn't get to me. Or when someone does something shady toward me, I don't make a scene. I take note of it, sure, but I still act totally normal around them—like nothing even happened. Some would label that self-abasement, but to me, it’s more about self-fulfillment... I want to show them their little games don't phase me, that I didn't even notice... that I couldn't care less. Maybe I'm just acting, because deep down I definitely saw what they did and I won't forget it... I'll probably settle the score eventually (though maybe not)... but seriously, it barely touches me... just a shrug... yeah... you're kind of the same way. Just an example.

I honestly don't think you have any trouble with being humble, it's more like you just have a little bit of a tendency toward masochism! 😬

Biserka32 The user said:It’s not that you have a problem with self-deprecation. It's that you have a serious leaning toward masochism. 😬

I'm with you on that.
He clearly hasn't the slightest clue what self-deprecation actually means.