Anorexia

Is this even possible???
I spent two hours glued to the TV watching this documentary about a seventeen-year-old girl from London struggling with Anorexia. I honestly can't wrap my head around the fact that something like this actually happens—that such a beautiful girl could just... die from starvation. It’s absolutely horrifying.

Is it some kind of mental breakdown????

Anorexia. Just Anorexia.

Psychology, yeah...

It's such a brutal disease, and unfortunately, it's way too common.

Casey Palmer5 said:Anorexia. Or maybe anorexia.

Psychological, sure...

It’s a brutal illness, and unfortunately, far too common.

Either spelling works; I assume that's how you'd write it here in the States.

stormycobra28 said:Is this actually possible???
I spent two hours glued to the TV watching a documentary about a seventeen-year-old girl from London suffering from Anorexia. I still can't quite wrap my head around the fact that something like this even exists—that such a beautiful young woman could just... die from starvation. It’s absolutely horrific.

Is it psychological or what????

Why is it so hard to believe that this happens?
Honestly, this has been an issue among young people for a long time now—and it isn't just limited to girls.
I know quite a bit about the subject myself, mostly because my Sister fell ill with Anorexia a few years back.
She's been recovered for a while now, but at the end of the day, the root cause is always psychological...

I didn't actually know the girl personally, but my parents were close friends with her folks. Back in the day—this was long before any of the recent turmoil—she was actually voted Homecoming Queen. That’s when the downward spiral started, this obsessive drive to drop every last pound. Sadly, her parents didn't catch on to what was happening until things had already spiraled out of control. She managed to pull herself back from the brink and return to a semblance of normalcy, but the damage was done. Her skin took such a massive hit that she went from being this stunning girl to... well, to put it bluntly, she became unattractive.
She tried every fad diet and extreme treatment imaginable, and it all ended with her jumping from a building.
Every time someone brings up Anorexia, that's the face I see.
In her case, I don't see any obvious underlying mental illness triggering the Anorexia, other than perhaps some toxic ambition and the misguided belief that being skin and bones is the ultimate standard of beauty.😢

Karen Brooks said:In this specific instance, I don't really see any underlying psychological issues driving the Anorexia—unless you count toxic ambition and the misguided notion that being skin and bones is the gold standard for beauty.😢

I mean, what kind of mental state would even drive someone toward that level of self-destruction??
Starving yourself just to satisfy some "toxic ambition" or the delusion that looking skeletal is the peak of aesthetics... that isn't exactly a "normal" way for a mind to function.

Honestly, you’ve got a point there. It’s pretty clear that things have just gone completely sideways in her head. What’s truly absurd is how this whole mess traces back to that disastrous election. Before that, she was supposedly doing just fine—nothing about her suggested she had any obsessive drive in that direction. Word on the street is people actually pressured her into running because she didn't even think it was worth her time. Of course, everyone has an opinion on these things, so I'd take those rumors with a heavy grain of salt.

boldeagle3 said:I mean, what kind of mindset would someone have to possess to drive them to such a total breakdown?

Depression. It’s honestly terrifying how those people actually are—just deeply depressed. At least, that's what I've read about.

I have a friend who was on the edge of Anorexia a few years back. Or at least, that’s how I perceived it. In like a month or so, she dropped from about 155 lbs down to 127. She just wouldn't eat anything all day long.

Writing it out as 127 lbs makes it sound fine, but trust me—she looked sick. She’s always been around 155 and it looks great on her (it just sounds bad when you write the number down).

I don't know what happened with her, but maybe something just clicked in her head and she went back to 155. She looks wonderful again.

Anyway, I don't personally know anyone with Anorexia. Thank goodness.

It’s not really about the number on the scale itself; it’s more about how that weight sits relative to your height. Generally, Anorexia is defined as being 15% or more below a healthy body mass for your stature. And obviously, we're talking about being underweight, not overweight 🙂

Back when I was 52kg, I actually looked quite 👍 even though I didn't have Anorexia. Honestly, if I were that light today, I'd be miserable 🙄

Here’s a really solid link that breaks down the illness and what people going through it actually deal with.

http://www.priory-hospital.co.uk/htm/anorex.htm

It’s such a brutal disease, and the consequences are just devastating... everything about this struggle is heavy...

Casey Palmer5 said:Here is a solid link that breaks down the illness and the typical profile of those struggling with it.

http://www.priory-hospital.co.uk/htm/anorex.htm

It’s a brutal disease, and the fallout is just as devastating... everything about this struggle is heavy.

👍 👍 👍 👍

boldeagle3 said:Seriously, what kind of mindset drives someone to total self-destruction like this??
Starving yourself just because you have some "twisted ambition or a delusional belief that being skin and bones is the gold standard of beauty" isn't just an outlier—it’s a sign of something deeply wrong mentally.

It’s not always about chasing some idealized version of perfection, either. There are layers to this, and plenty of different motivations behind it. It’s a whole spectrum of emotions and attitudes.

I honestly can't wrap my head around what goes on in the minds of people struggling with Anorexia; from my perspective, it seems like they simply find it impossible to eat, constantly feeling full or just generally repulsed by food altogether. At 6'3" and 214 lbs, I can safely say I don't fit that description 😁

Ashley Vaughn79 said:Depression. It’s honestly terrifying how those people actually are—just deeply depressed. Or so I’ve read...

I have a friend who was hovering right on the edge of Anorexia a few years back—at least, if my estimation is anything to go by. Within a blink of an eye—maybe a month at most—she plummeted from about 155 lbs down to 128. She would go entire days without touching a single thing.

Now, seeing "128 lbs" written out might sound perfectly fine to some, but believe me—she looked deathly ill. She had always been around 155 and it suited her perfectly (it just sounds ugly when you write the number out, I suppose)...

I have no idea what snapped her out of it, but she eventually worked her way back up to 155. She looks great again.

Anyway, I don't personally know anyone else struggling with Anorexia. Thank God for that.

With my Sister, I never really noticed any depression. Even when there were hints of it, she’d snap back to her usual self almost immediately. So, unlike me—since depression tends to tear me apart quite frequently—she didn't deal with it. And yet, I never once considered that my appearance needed to be a certain way just to make an impression on the outside world.
Since I've never been in that position myself, I can't truly wrap my head around the mental state of someone who is capable of starving themselves... My Sister spent two months eating nothing but slices of bread a day, but she was away for the holidays, so we didn't see it. When she finally came home, though, she was throwing food away, hiding it, stuffing it into bags and stashing them in cabinets or under the bed—all while insisting to us that she had eaten.
Back in high school, she looked like she was still in elementary school—her lowest weight was maybe 85 lbs at 5'5".
There’s another issue, too: she always viewed me as a role model (she’s the type of person who will rarely admit to copying someone or seeing something and deciding to replicate it; everything is always "her own idea").
I have a very fragile build—I'm about 99 lbs, though everyone tells me I don't look like that number suggests—whereas she is quite curvy.
Today, she understands what she did to herself and how she used to look; she loves her body now, even though she realizes she quite distorted it during that period of starvation... but you can't undo that.
She used to wear an A cup, now she's a C... I don't know what she weighs now, and she doesn't even care.
Ultimately, she’s an attractive young woman today with the kind of curves men admire.
Unfortunately, Anorexia left its mark on her psyche.

Oleander Somniferum said:It isn't always about chasing some idealized image of beauty. There are reasons—many different reasons—involving an entire spectrum of emotions and psychological drivers.

I know.
Of course the underlying causes are rooted in emotions, attitudes, and other "mental health" factors...
It doesn't necessarily have to be about achieving a certain look; she could have been suffering from an entirely different illness altogether—it wasn't strictly a case of Anorexia.

My neighbor is struggling with anorexia, bulimia, or some combination of the two; I can't say for sure. Seeing her out in a mini skirt during the summer is terrifying. It’s like looking at a walking corpse. Imagine legs where the shins are significantly thinner than the knees. Imagine forearms where you can see both bones clearly. It's gruesome.

She isn't depressed, but she seems driven by perfectionism. I see her outside just sucking on grass for hours. Sometimes I catch her at the window dusting rags. That's probably how she spends most of her free time.

When we talk, everything seems normal. It was only when I brought up fitness training that she became noticeably defensive. As if she desperately needs it.

She has an interesting tactic with food. She won't tell you directly that she doesn't want anything when you offer, but when I asked if she wanted a beer, she accepted it and never even touched it. Same with actual meals. You put a plate of salad in front of her and she just leaves it there. Honestly, I'm just waiting for the day I find her obituary in the local mailbox.

stormylynx14 said:She isn't depressed, but she definitely seems to have a perfectionist streak.

You hit the nail on the head there.
In my experience, every girl I've met struggling with Anorexia fits that exact profile... honestly, I'd go as far as to say they're just pathologically overambitious.

granitebadger25 said:You’ve hit the nail on the head there.
Every girl struggling with Anorexia I’ve ever met fits that exact description... if anything, I’d say they tend to be borderline hyper-ambitious about it.

Exactly.
Sister started college this year, and we all know how that goes—the endless studying, the pressure...
Does she actually know the material? Sure, but her goal isn't mastery, it's just getting that perfect 4.0.

And when she actually steps foot outside, she preps herself like she's walking a runway in Milan; the whole routine takes hours.
Even if she's just grabbing a coffee, heading downtown, or walking across campus... she has to look "perfect."

She spends an hour or even ninety minutes every single day flat-ironing her hair, just so it looks "just right" for the public eye.

But then you look at her bedroom, and it looks like the aftermath of a disaster in Chernobyl... she's perfectly fine living in a layer of dust and cobwebs amidst total chaos.

I haven't quite gotten the impression that appearance—or rather, their distorted perception of it—is the primary driver for these women. Instead, it seems to be an obsession with controlling every single variable in their environment.

I know several women who seem to have "recovered" from Anorexia, meaning they’ve stabilized their weight, yet the behavioral patterns remain unchanged. Everything is meticulously planned down to the smallest detail. Life goes smoothly as long as things follow their exact script—whether it's college, a career path, or even marriage. However, the moment something unpredictable happens that they can't fully dominate, they regress right back to those old eating habits.

I don't want to generalize, but every girl I know with this struggle is highly intelligent, charming, and unassuming. They make excellent conversationalists, which actually makes them masterful manipulators within their families and inner circles. At the end of the day, sooner or later, they always get their way.

It strikes me as rather odd that anyone today would find the existence of a condition like Anorexia surprising. Still, I suppose it is always prudent to educate oneself—better late than never, as they say.

Personally, I haven’t dealt with Anorexia, but I have lived through Bulimia. Firsthand experience. Unlike Anorexia, where the individual simply refuses to eat, someone with Bulimia eats—and they eat a great deal. They binge, and once they’ve overindulged, they purge it all, whether by vomiting or through other means—metabolism boosters, detox teas, excessive exercise, or similar methods, though usually, it's a frantic combination of several at once.

I noticed someone above seems to be conflating Anorexia and Bulimia, so I should probably clarify—though, truth be told, the two disorders very often travel in pairs. It is somewhat easier to identify an anorexic person by their physical appearance; they tend to be "more" emaciated. A person with Bulimia also loses weight, but perhaps not quite as rapidly as an anorexic, given that they are actually consuming food, and some of it inevitably gets digested...

And the root causes? Well, I suspect they are remarkably similar for both. Primarily, we are looking at a profound lack of self-confidence and self-esteem, which is frequently intertwined with depression and related issues. There is certainly an element of perfectionism and ambition involved, but I believe the deciding factor is that desperate urge to please others—the desire to be accepted by one's social circle, the misguided thought that being thinner will make you more likable... It has absolutely nothing to do with intelligence (I've seen comments along the lines of "only an idiot would do this to themselves"—thankfully, I haven't encountered those types here yet). In fact, highly intelligent individuals are very often the "victims" of these disorders, likely because they feel "different from everyone else," unaccepted, and try to fit in by thinking thinness is a way to belong. And it is vital to understand that these people, no matter how thin they become, still perceive themselves as overweight; they feel they must constantly lose more weight...

So, that is my somewhat layperson's perspective... drawn from personal experience and things I've picked up along the way. I likely haven't covered every single nuance, but there are hundreds of websites out there filled with resources; this is more just how I experienced it.

As for the consequences... we can discuss those another time, but they are truly harrowing. Fortunately, I managed to break out of that "vicious cycle" relatively early, so my own consequences aren't quite so tragic, but they can be far worse—right up to the point of death...