I messed up, and I know it.

So, here’s the situation as I see it... I’ve entered my first truly serious relationship, and I actually fell in love. But right at the beginning, I messed up—I cheated. It wasn't a full affair, just kissing another woman twice, but it was enough. When she finally confronted me about whether I had been unfaithful, I chose to be honest. We broke up exactly a week after that confession.
I want her back.😢 She just couldn't get past it. The last time we spoke, she admitted she still cares about me, but she refuses to try again because she's terrified I'll just break her heart all over again. No matter how much I swear I've changed, or how much I tell her that the guilt of keeping it from her initially has been eating me alive, she isn't budging. What would you all do if you were in my shoes? Some people are telling me I should have just kept my mouth shut and lied about it. Personally, I feel like I had to tell the truth; if the roles were reversed, I'd want to know if I were being betrayed. Is it even possible to move past infidelity if someone is genuinely remorseful and it was just a stupid, spontaneous mistake made while drunk?
😕...

Brandon Ortiz62 said:So, here’s the situation as I see it... I’ve entered my first truly serious relationship, and I actually fell in love. But right at the beginning, I messed up—I cheated. It wasn't a full affair, just kissing another woman twice, but it was enough. When she finally confronted me about whether I had been unfaithful, I chose to be honest. We broke up exactly a week after that confession.
I want her back.😢 She just couldn't get past it. The last time we spoke, she admitted she still cares about me, but she refuses to try again because she's terrified I'll just break her heart all over again. No matter how much I swear I've changed, or how much I tell her that the guilt of keeping it from her initially has been eating me alive, she isn't budging. What would you all do if you were in my shoes? Some people are telling me I should have just kept my mouth shut and lied about it. Personally, I feel like I had to tell the truth; if the roles were reversed, I'd want to know if I were being betrayed. Is it even possible to move past infidelity if someone is genuinely remorseful and it was just a stupid, spontaneous mistake made while drunk?
😕...

Look, I value honesty too, and maybe she should have gotten it. But try putting yourself in her shoes for a second and ask yourself how *you* would react if she did that to you...
As for the part in bold, I don't even know what to say—I just really hope you didn't actually tell her that!!!

Look, I appreciate honesty as much as anyone, and maybe she really should have been more upfront. But just for a second, try stepping into her shoes—how would you actually react if she had pulled a stunt like that on you?
As for that bolded part, I honestly don't know what to say. I just really hope you didn't actually say that to her.

Even if she cheats on me now, let her. Let her do it a hundred times if that’s what it takes to settle the score and clear my conscience... damn...