Recommendations wanted - I know a great one...

handymen, flooring experts, tilers, a top-tier restaurant, a great movie, some damn hotel, etc.

I don’t know what your experiences have been with recommendations, but in at least 80% of cases where I actually listened to someone else, I ended up getting screwed over... it makes me wonder, what is wrong with these people?

They just want to act like they're the ultimate authority because they "know things," they "have connections," or maybe they're a cinephile, a semi-pro 😁 sommelier, or whatever the hell else.

Take my last two examples... I had two different people recommend the exact same restaurant—let's call it "The Mediocre Bistro" if you're curious. I go there, and it’s mediocre at best. Actually, it might be worse than that. Then, because I can't let it go, I go online to read reviews, and people are absolutely tearing it apart. But noooooooo, "Go to The Mediocre Bistro, it's amazing, the food is great, the atmosphere is perfect," and all that nonsense.
😢

Second example... I'm renovating my apartment, and I talk to a friend who just finished some work at his place. He tells me, "Man, the crew that worked at my house was suuuuuuuuper. Fast, punctual, affordable, everything went perfectly..." And I, like an idiot, listen to him.
The job is already taking twice as long as originally quoted, the price has jumped by over 40% (not that I'm paying them that much), and they've botched half the work...

So, what's the deal with people? I get that tastes vary... that's a given. But if someone asks me for a good series and mentions they don't like Sci-Fi, I'm not going to suggest Battlestar Galactica...
If someone says they aren't into historical dramas, I'm not going to say, "You have to see it, trust me, Braveheart is a suuuuuuuuper film."

And so on.
As for contractors, don't give me that crap about how they did a flawless job for you while they completely trashed my place. 😵

The bottom line... screw recommendations. If I had just closed my eyes, opened the Yellow Pages 🤣 under "restaurants," and picked a random spot, I probably would have found somewhere better than The Mediocre Bistro. If I had done the same with construction companies, I would have found better ones too...

Those are just the two most recent examples... unfortunately, there are plenty more, but I don't feel like dwelling on it anymore. 😢

It's obviously that classic thing: "I want to look cool and show off how much I know and how many people I know," only to end up looking like a fool, and then feeling even more like a fool 😬 for actually following the recommendation...

It feels like you're just trying to get on the prosecutor's good side.

Since you’re clearly so eager to tear them apart, why not give us some actual specifics? What was so bad about it? I actually stopped by there once, and honestly, I didn't notice anything out of the ordinary. It seemed like a perfectly normal, chill spot—not even that crowded.

Of course I’m being salty. We were sitting there waiting forty minutes for our main course in a restaurant that had maybe five or six other customers in the entire place... then my "stuffed" Philly cheesesteak finally arrives, only to find about an ounce of cheese and a microscopic sliver of ham. Even the turkey dish my colleague ordered wasn't anything special—at best, it was mediocre.

And as for recommendations... people act like it's the greatest place ever, but when I posted my review on the food forums, several others actually chimed in with similar horror stories. 😢

Look, let’s be clear: I’m not just out here trashing every little bistro. I’ve called out even the legendary Mundak 👎 and that local "institution" 🤣 known as "at Shim's." There were probably a few other negative reviews out there too, but who bothers remembering those? 😁

Ultimately, the point isn't about bashing specific restaurants; it's about why people feel the need to recommend absolutely everything they eat, regardless of quality.

Personally, I steer clear of giving recommendations. When I do suggest something, I make sure it actually aligns with what the person likes and wants, and whether it's genuinely good 👍 and 🙏 rather than just... whatever... okay... tolerable... or just passable.

Plus, I run into these people basically every single day, and they’ll just spout off advice about what’s "the best" without even giving it a second thought—they don't care if it's actually good, they just want to feel like they're dropping some big recommendation...
Honestly, yeah, it's wild how people work.

When I give recommendations, I try to be as grounded as possible. I always tell them, "Look, go ahead and check it out, do your homework, call them up, look around, and you'll see for yourself."
I'm not about to just walk in here and hype something up when a thousand other people have already trashed it...
But seriously, so many people will rave about things that are nowhere near reality. Sure, perception is everything, but some of these people are just swinging from one extreme to the other...

Please, give me a break. I deal with these types constantly.
When people start singing praises just because they’ve finally decided to loosen up, it’s usually because they’re desperate for everyone else to lower their standards too. Otherwise, they remain exactly who they are: losers.
They refuse to admit they had a bad experience because doing so would be an admission of defeat. They cling to this hollow "winner" mentality that possesses neither logic nor any actual connection to winning.

Their ultimate objective is always to find something positive to say about themselves, regardless of the circumstances. Why? I'll leave you to draw your own conclusions. 😉

Man, I once had this one "friend"... this was a few years back when gel nails were all the rage.
Jeeeeeeeesus, there’s this girl over in Santa Barbara who does incredible nails. Seriously, tell her I sent you and she’ll give you a discount, then just swing by my hotel (she used to work at a hotel in Santa Barbara) and we can head home together.
So, I took the bus out to Santa Barbara to see her, got my gel nails done—nothing fancy, and of course, she charged me full price. After that, I headed over to the hotel where my "friend" worked, and she goes, "Oh my god, I don't feel like going home yet, let's grab lunch!" Naturally, she didn't pick up the tab; we both paid our own way.

Basically, I could have just gone to my manicurist in Cleveland, who was just as good and charged the exact same price. I would've saved the trip to Santa Barbara, the wasted time, and the money spent on lunch with her.

Later on, she landed a job at a different hotel on some island and called me up, inviting me to come visit. But I was smarter this time.
"Oh my god, this hotel is so amazing, come stay! I'll get your room sorted out." Well, "getting my room sorted out" actually meant: instead of you booking it over the phone, I'll just walk over to the front desk and check you in under my name, and you'll show up and pay the full rate...

I didn't go, and I haven't spoken to her since.
☕

I can't stand those unsolicited recommendations... I know a guy who thinks he's a real expert... It never ends well. Especially when someone tries to vouch for someone's work ethic and ends up recommending an absolute idiot. I guess people just love feeling indispensable about where they’ve worked (like some local diner) and acting like they’ve never encountered anything less than perfection in their lives.

Bradley Wood43 said:handymen, flooring experts, tilers, a top-tier restaurant, a great movie, some damn hotel, etc.

I don’t know what your experiences have been with recommendations, but in at least 80% of cases where I actually listened to someone else, I ended up getting screwed over... it makes me wonder, what is wrong with these people?

They just want to act like they're the ultimate authority because they "know things," they "have connections," or maybe they're a cinephile, a semi-pro 😁 sommelier, or whatever the hell else.

Take my last two examples... I had two different people recommend the exact same restaurant—let's call it "The Mediocre Bistro" if you're curious. I go there, and it’s mediocre at best. Actually, it might be worse than that. Then, because I can't let it go, I go online to read reviews, and people are absolutely tearing it apart. But noooooooo, "Go to The Mediocre Bistro, it's amazing, the food is great, the atmosphere is perfect," and all that nonsense.
😢

Second example... I'm renovating my apartment, and I talk to a friend who just finished some work at his place. He tells me, "Man, the crew that worked at my house was suuuuuuuuper. Fast, punctual, affordable, everything went perfectly..." And I, like an idiot, listen to him.
The job is already taking twice as long as originally quoted, the price has jumped by over 40% (not that I'm paying them that much), and they've botched half the work...

So, what's the deal with people? I get that tastes vary... that's a given. But if someone asks me for a good series and mentions they don't like Sci-Fi, I'm not going to suggest Battlestar Galactica...
If someone says they aren't into historical dramas, I'm not going to say, "You have to see it, trust me, Braveheart is a suuuuuuuuper film."

And so on.
As for contractors, don't give me that crap about how they did a flawless job for you while they completely trashed my place. 😵

The bottom line... screw recommendations. If I had just closed my eyes, opened the Yellow Pages 🤣 under "restaurants," and picked a random spot, I probably would have found somewhere better than The Mediocre Bistro. If I had done the same with construction companies, I would have found better ones too...

Those are just the two most recent examples... unfortunately, there are plenty more, but I don't feel like dwelling on it anymore. 😢

It's obviously that classic thing: "I want to look cool and show off how much I know and how many people I know," only to end up looking like a fool, and then feeling even more like a fool 😬 for actually following the recommendation...

Man, it's hard to wrap your head around the fact that recommendations have way less to do with quality or good prices and everything to do with hooking up friends, buddies, or relatives. Everyone is out there hustling for work and cash, so they trade favors—like, "hey, I landed Matt this gig, so you should hook me up with a discount from Frank for that stuff I need."
On top of that, when you're asking for a recommendation, you aren't looking to get ripped off, you want it done right, AND you want it cheap... well, that's a tough trifecta to hit. If you're a bit of a perfectionist, you're basically stuck with the high-end pros because they have the luxury of spending extra time making sure you're happy, which they'll definitely charge you for. Then you've got the cheap guys who are just doing side hustles to pay the bills, which usually means the work is just "good enough" until the real pros show up. So yeah, take recommendations with a huge grain of salt. Haggle on the price, demand penalties for every little mistake or delay, and be that demanding client who expects everything to be perfect. That kind of customer is their absolute worst nightmare, but they know if they don't do the job right, they won't see another dime...

Alright, some "recommendations" are driven by pure self-interest, while others might actually be meant for the benefit of others.

In my experience, none of the referrals I’ve received were motivated by any kind of kickback for the person suggesting them.
Maybe once in a blue moon, sure, but honestly, I highly doubt a friend recommending a contractor to me stands to gain anything from it. It’s simpler than that: they used the service, thought the work was solid, and passed it along. To be clear, they weren't the cheapest option—I did my homework and looked at several other bids—but they weren't overpriced either. They sat right in the middle of about seven or eight different quotes, plus the recommendation, and there you have it. 😁

It wasn't even about trying to cut corners on cost. Look, it’s not like I’m throwing money around, but we aren't talking about massive renovations here. And the recommendation wasn't based on finding a bargain. In fact, it was quite the opposite... it was literally, "They’re a little pricier than average, but the quality is great and I’m happy with them." 🤣

Whatever... I’m willing to pay a premium if it guarantees better quality. At the end of the day, it’s worth it. Besides, I ended up negotiating the final price down quite a bit—not down to the initial quote, but significantly lower than what they walked in with yesterday. 😬

And naturally, I don't hand over a dime until the job is fully completed (even though they did ask me for 😉 ).

Regardless... this isn't really about contractors; it's about why people seem to throw recommendations around so carelessly.
I could probably ask five friends, colleagues, or even random people on the street tomorrow to recommend a high-end saddle 😁 or a quality crossbow 🤣, and at least two of them would just point me toward someone they heard makes equestrian gear or can source a bow, saying, "Hey Tom, give this guy a call, he makes the best saddles west of the Grand Canyon," or "George can get you a top-tier crossbow." And the kicker? They don't know the first thing about saddles or crossbows any more than I do... which means their advice is worthless.

I'm exaggerating a bit, obviously, but I'm not far from the truth.

TBF says:
I am a genius, a true marvel of nature.
I know everything there is to know about the world and everything is perfectly clear to me... I suppose that's just how it is.

To’s just how people are—everyone has their own way of doing things.