What were your biggest pregnancy surprises and pet peeves?

Jeremy Morris2 said:Listen, those comments from others are just plain stupid, but now that I'm nearing the end of this pregnancy, I find myself constantly wondering how women who already have a little one at home manage to pull it all off while constantly chasing them around and looking after them 😲 seriously, massive props to all you repeat moms out there 😍

I’m actually 27 weeks along right now and honestly, I’m doing fine, though there's still a ways to go😉 I keep telling myself I’ll feel just like I did during my first pregnancy when I felt totally amazing. I didn't deal with any swelling back then, and since I gave birth in the middle of summer, I was active right up until the delivery. I actually went out for coffee with my godmother in the city when the contractions started, but I didn't want to say anything because she is such a massive panic attack waiting to happen. The only thing is, the weight seems to be creeping on a bit faster this time🙂 Other than that, my daughter is an absolute joy. No matter how demanding she was as a baby, she’s just wonderful now

On topic...dealing with kids in the car is basically a constant battle I've had with my mother-in-law since my first pregnancy. My girl used to scream her head off in the car because she felt like I was "torturing" her by putting her in the car seat instead of just holding her in my lap. Her brothers were always held in laps, so later on, they could just lie back and sleep peacefully in the car without it being a traumatic experience

Everything about this pregnancy is getting on my nerves lately 🙂
The constant sweating is driving me crazy 🙂
I feel like I'm overheating constantly; it feels like a heatwave in the middle of July with temperatures hitting 100 degrees 😠

Jeremy Morris2 said:Ugh, so my mom 🙄 is basically asking how we're supposed to put a newborn in a car seat when she used to just carry us in those little infant pillows when leaving the hospital. And when it's the grandmother of your baby telling you this—someone who's going to be watching them and responsible for them most of the time—you can't just brush it off, right? 😲

I don't think you're wrong at all—some days I think to myself that it would be totally fine to lend out stuff that's brand new—like, unused items from my daughter—but once I realize I'm passing on things that my own little girl actually wore and filled with that sweet baby smell, well, I just can't do it. 🤣 Lester, am I crazy? 🤷

Look, isn't it kind of your own fault that you're pregnant, though? It's almost like that attitude of "well, I did it, so now I'll just sit here, blame's on someone else." It sounds super primitive, but man, how many times have I heard that exact thing while riding the subway or buses in NYC... 😢 🙄

The other day, some self-righteous mom at the American Red Cross asked me to stand up for her daughter, who was struggling to stand because she’s morbidly obese (literally, BMI > 40). I'm sitting there 33 weeks pregnant, she's overweight, and she's trying to lecture me about how hard it is for her little girl... 🙂

I sincerely hope you didn't actually get up for her... What sheer insolence!

It really ought to be legally mandated that people assist pregnant women, though perhaps such laws already exist and are simply ignored by everyone; then we could at least have the luxury of choosing whether or not we feel like sitting down.

boldbison32 said:I think it's okay to share an anecdote about people not standing up for pregnant women that I experienced during my first pregnancy. Now that I'm pregnant again, I feel like I should retell it.🙂 I'm sitting on the bus quite late in my pregnancy, and this elderly gentleman gets on and comes straight to me, expecting me to stand up so he can sit because seniors are supposed to get priority on the bus. I told him he should ask someone else because I'm pregnant and I also have the right to be seated. To that, he basically told me it wasn't his fault that he was old, but that it was my own fault for being pregnant, and therefore I should be the one to stand up for him.☕

He could have just lived life at a faster pace, died young, and left behind a handsome corpse instead of waiting around to reach old age. Truly, there are certain individuals who seem to have dropped straight from outer space; they possess a complete lack of basic social awareness.

Jacob Phillips4 said:He could have just lived life at a faster pace, died young, and left behind a handsome corpse instead of waiting around to reach old age. Truly, there are certain individuals who seem to have dropped straight from outer space; they possess a complete lack of basic social awareness.

Brilliant. 😁

Jacob Phillips4 said:On topic: the complete lack of courtesy toward pregnant women. It seems nobody here bothers to offer up a seat, even when someone is sitting in a designated priority spot clearly marked for expectant mothers. Honestly, I find the elderly to be the most difficult demographic—you see them everywhere, especially when you’re stuck in a massive queue at a clinic during the winter flu season. I rarely dare to say anything to them, though if I did, I’d likely be torn to shreds regardless. Just the other day, I was losing my mind waiting at a small Verizon store to finish some business for my partner; if it hadn't been for him, I would have walked out. There were always about five people hovering there, and naturally, since filling out one standard service contract takes forty-five minutes, they managed to form a massive line. Of course, the entire shop only has one single chair. Everyone in that room took turns occupying that one seat, staring at me like I was some sort of alien specimen, yet not a single soul thought to offer it to me. One would think that before taking a seat themselves, they might glance around to see if anyone else in the room actually has priority. I felt physically ill from being in such a cramped space with so many people crowded in; I had to step outside for air several times just to cope. Eventually, I reached my breaking point when some girl in her early twenties wandered in, and I finally asked her if she could let me sit down. She stood up, thankfully. But it is undeniably worse here than even in New York City... there is absolutely no culture of yielding your seat to pregnant women.

I realize this is trivial and that this topic is a constant fixture on this board, but I simply had to vent...

Is this Vienna or what? 😁

At least based on how it sounds.

Jeremy Morris2 said:Ugh, so my mom 🙄 is basically asking how we're supposed to put a newborn in a car seat when she used to just carry us in those little infant pillows when leaving the hospital. And when it's the grandmother of your baby telling you this—someone who's going to be watching them and responsible for them most of the time—you can't just brush it off, right? 😲

I don't think you're wrong at all—some days I think to myself that it would be totally fine to lend out stuff that's brand new—like, unused items from my daughter—but once I realize I'm passing on things that my own little girl actually wore and filled with that sweet baby smell, well, I just can't do it. 🤣 Lester, am I crazy? 🤷

Look, isn't it kind of your own fault that you're pregnant, though? It's almost like that attitude of "well, I did it, so now I'll just sit here, blame's on someone else." It sounds super primitive, but man, how many times have I heard that exact thing while riding the subway or buses in NYC... 😢 🙄

The other day, some self-righteous mom at the American Red Cross asked me to stand up for her daughter, who was struggling to stand because she’s morbidly obese (literally, BMI > 40). I'm sitting there 33 weeks pregnant, she's overweight, and she's trying to lecture me about how hard it is for her little girl... 🙂

Dana Brown8 said:I actually had a standoff with mine about the car seat (she thinks holding the baby in her lap 🙂 is fine), but then I showed her some crash test videos on YouTube and printed out those safety pamphlets from the hospital. Now there's peace. 😁
It was simpler back when we were kids and there were only two beat-up old Ford Pintos or Chevy Novas on the road... times have changed.

Oh, absolutely—a pillow is a wonderful thing, 😁 provided the child is lying on a flat surface 😉
But I am not hearing this sentiment just from my own mother or mother-in-law; I hear it from people my own age too—women who are pregnant or have toddlers.
My mother even called me just to tell me that she spoke with my niece—who has three kids herself—to ask her about car seats, because she finds it unbelievable that you put a newborn in one! She told her there is no point in even buying a car seat until the baby is six months old, since they should just stay in the stroller bassinet until then.

Kimberly Phillips6 said:Oh, absolutely—a pillow is a wonderful thing, 😁 provided the child is lying on a flat surface 😉
But I am not hearing this sentiment just from my own mother or mother-in-law; I hear it from people my own age too—women who are pregnant or have toddlers.
My mother even called me just to tell me that she spoke with my niece—who has three kids herself—to ask her about car seats, because she finds it unbelievable that you put a newborn in one! She told her there is no point in even buying a car seat until the baby is six months old, since they should just stay in the stroller bassinet until then.

How old is your cousin?

My mom thought it was pretty weird too, the idea of taking a newborn on a road trip. She had her doubts, but I think it’s just because she isn't really up to speed on how things work nowadays. Once I explained that it's basically standard practice and everyone does it, she calmed down. I don't think she's exactly thrilled about it, but she knows baby safety comes first. Still, we're sticking to the major interstates on our way home—you can never be too careful when you're out on the road.

Susan Martin4 said:My mom thought it was pretty weird too, the idea of taking a newborn on a road trip. She had her doubts, but I think it’s just because she isn't really up to speed on how things work nowadays. Once I explained that it's basically standard practice and everyone does it, she calmed down. I don't think she's exactly thrilled about it, but she knows baby safety comes first. Still, we're sticking to the major interstates on our way home—you can never be too careful when you're out on the road.

A friend of mine had some guy fly right into her car while she was just stepping out of her driveway... she hadn't even made it five feet. If that can happen in a driveway, imagine the chaos on a highway. My rule is simple: never go anywhere without an appropriate car seat.

So, they say most accidents happen right around the house—you know, those quick ten-minute trips just to hit the local CVS or grab something from the corner store.

But honestly, how are mothers supposed to stay sane when even doctors and nurses won't give them a straight answer? It drives me nuts. Dealing with all these conflicting takes from medical staff...🙂

Dana Brown8 said:How old is your cousin?

She is 40.

Susan Martin4 said:So, they say most accidents happen right around the house—you know, those quick ten-minute trips just to hit the local CVS or grab something from the corner store.

But honestly, how are mothers supposed to stay sane when even doctors and nurses won't give them a straight answer? It drives me nuts. Dealing with all these conflicting takes from medical staff...🙂

Exactly!

rowdyjackal12 said:Is this Vienna or what? 😁

At least based on how it sounds.

It isn't, actually; it's FC Barcelona, though I am increasingly convinced that this particular brand of globalized mediocrity is becoming a universal phenomenon.

Susan Martin4 said:My mom thought it was pretty weird too, the idea of taking a newborn on a road trip. She had her doubts, but I think it’s just because she isn't really up to speed on how things work nowadays. Once I explained that it's basically standard practice and everyone does it, she calmed down. I don't think she's exactly thrilled about it, but she knows baby safety comes first. Still, we're sticking to the major interstates on our way home—you can never be too careful when you're out on the road.

To defend your mother’s position, I actually had no idea that infants were supposed to be in rear-facing seats either. I am expecting my own little one in just a few months, so I feel quite fortunate to have learned the truth here through this community. It seems prudent to bundle the car seat purchase with the crib and stroller. Just to clarify, is the seat designed specifically for infants different from the ones purchased later, or is it the same model with more adjustable positions?

Jacob Phillips4 said:To defend your mother’s position, I actually had no idea that infants were supposed to be in rear-facing seats either. I am expecting my own little one in just a few months, so I feel quite fortunate to have learned the truth here through this community. It seems prudent to bundle the car seat purchase with the crib and stroller. Just to clarify, is the seat designed specifically for infants different from the ones purchased later, or is it the same model with more adjustable positions?

You have the infant carrier, which works from birth until they hit about 20 pounds or outgrow the height; then there are those combo seats rated 0-40 lbs. Those use a special insert for newborns, and once the baby grows, you pull the insert out and eventually turn the seat forward-facing instead of rear-facing.

Obviously, those combo seats aren't compatible with strollers and stay in the car. An infant carrier, however, clicks right into the stroller so you can carry the baby straight from the car without waking them up.
We barely ever even used the carrier on the stroller; it was practically negligible for us.

Jacob Phillips4 said:To defend your mother’s position, I actually had no idea that infants were supposed to be in rear-facing seats either. I am expecting my own little one in just a few months, so I feel quite fortunate to have learned the truth here through this community. It seems prudent to bundle the car seat purchase with the crib and stroller. Just to clarify, is the seat designed specifically for infants different from the ones purchased later, or is it the same model with more adjustable positions?

The first one is the "infant carrier" meant for 0-20 lbs, and they usually come bundled with those travel system strollers... though you don't necessarily need the bundle. You can find them sold separately too.

Much appreciated; you all are truly wonderful. At this moment, I feel as though I am staring at an endless "encyclopedia of infant care" and possess absolutely no practical knowledge whatsoever. I suppose I will manage to absorb a decent amount during the parenting course I am scheduled to attend, though I suspect my most valuable insights will ultimately be gathered right here on this forum.😍

It’s honestly driving me crazy how much I have to pee during this second pregnancy at 16 weeks😳
when it happened the first time, I actually thought my water had broken, but now every single time I sneeze, my underwear is soaked😠
I'm waking up 5 or 6 times a night too, and there's no way I can just deal with it... if I try to rush, there's a huge chance I won't make it to the bathroom in time
I don't know what's wrong with me🤷

The stench of cigarette smoke on my hands and coming from the breath of the doctor examining me at the hospital was just revolting... honestly, it felt like I showed up for an appointment at some dive bar instead of a medical clinic.

Man, dealing with people at a Target. As customers. It’s a whole different breed of thick-skinned jerks, honestly. That's why I don't bother going there anymore.