What were your biggest pregnancy surprises and pet peeves?

Susan Martin4 said:First, I was just poking at my stomach when it was barely even visible 🤷

Now, what’s really getting to me is that I can't even sneeze or cough normally if my bladder is full without having a little accident. It makes me feel pretty pathetic 🙈

And don't get me started on how everyone reacts when they hear it's a boy. They all go, "Oh, that's great!" or "Congratulations!" Like, if it were a girl, would they suddenly stop being happy? Whatever...

🤣 Same here, totally same here 🤣

though I kind of feel like maybe it’s from all those nasty UTIs I dealt with a few years back... like my bladder is just "damaged" or whatever. If that’s even a thing 🤷

I’m only about 12 weeks along now... this is already my second post in this thread 🤦
My parents, my sister, and my maid of honor all know. Honestly, I’m not even dreading the moment I tell the rest of them—it’s more the fear of when it becomes physically obvious, so I can’t hide behind excuses anymore
It’s not that I’m intentionally keeping my pregnancy a secret, but... I have a massive extended family. There are just too many aunts and cousins involved in my business for comfort. I am hoping I have one little ace up my sleeve to divert their attention, though... being the "black sheep" of the family is actually a decent way to dodge the spotlight 😁 I’ve put all my bets on that distraction working 😬

So, about my dad. My husband and I currently live 218 miles supported by my parents and his—just in opposite directions 😁
My dad says: It would be best if you moved back home now that you're pregnant
Excuse me? What, how, and why??
His reasoning: He thinks I won't be able to handle everything alone, so it would be "best" if I left my husband behind in New York City so he can keep working and living his life, while I and the baby move back home until I can write, read, and cross the street by myself again
If I'm the one struggling, then who exactly am I having this child for? My parents or for myself and my husband??

Everything has come to a head. My mother keeps calling—acting like such a busybody—asking me to explain to my husband exactly which stroller we’re going to buy once the baby arrives
As if we’ll be buying them one, two, or three months before the due date—who knows
But oh no! Absolutely not. You buy the stroller *after* the baby is born
If I let my mom go out to buy a stroller, she’ll come back with a grocery cart from a local farmer's market and expect me to pay full price for it as a baby stroller... honestly, I can take all those old traditions and grandmotherly "wisdom" and throw them straight in the trash

Jeremy Morris2 said:God, it feels like I'm reading my own family chat. Can we just collectively put everyone in the top 😉 😁

I also have to add my two cents about waiting for news—like that group of aunts gathered at Walmart around my belly, when the ultrasound tech tells us it's a girl, and they immediately start trying to soothe you with stuff like "Well, as long as they're healthy," or "Oh, don't worry, I had daughters too, it's no big deal," etc. No. Just... no. I simply cannot. 🤦 😕

And you haven't even experienced the true level of 'consolation' yet—when you were expecting one thing, but get a girl first, and now you realize you're back at square one needing a boy next time.🙂

copperheron18 said:And you haven't even experienced the true level of 'consolation' yet—when you were expecting one thing, but get a girl first, and now you realize you're back at square one needing a boy next time.🙂

I honestly don't even know how I'm supposed to react to things like this...

My mom totally freaked me out yesterday. My due date isn't until early April, but she started lecturing me in that "concerned" tone, insisting I need to be ready by late February just in case I go into preterm labor.
I spent the entire night having nightmares where I gave birth a month too early and completely forgot I'd even had a baby, so I just showed up to work the next morning like nothing happened. It didn't sink in until I realized I could fit back into my old jeans. Then panic set in about how the baby would eat, so I called my dad to come pick up a bottle of milk I'd pumped, and I called my boyfriend to grab the dog, rush him to the vet, and sit by the crib so nobody would snatch the kid... 🙂🙂

I'm exhausted.... 🙂

😢 😢

hang in there.

moms really know how to throw you off your game sometimes 😢

copperheron18 said:And you haven't even experienced the true level of 'consolation' yet—when you were expecting one thing, but get a girl first, and now you realize you're back at square one needing a boy next time.🙂

My neighbor told me yesterday, "Well, I guess there'll be a third one too." I don't buy it. It immediately drives me crazy. I start acting like Ally McBeal... just driving her insane 🙂... 🙂

I almost asked her if she felt less valued than her husband does... ☕

I simply could not remain silent in the face of such comments regarding young girls.

While I haven’t yet had the distinct honor of welcoming more little ones into my own family, let me be perfectly clear: if I find myself blessed with another daughter and someone dares to even hint at such nonsense, I shall have a very sharp retort ready to fire. 🙂

Honestly, I sometimes just feel like messing with people like that by dropping some sarcastic joke, you know? Like, "Oh, we'll just drop her off at an orphanage the second she's born, because there's no way a daughter is stepping foot in this house." I’d love to just sit back and watch the look on 🤣 😂
's faces.
Maybe it actually would be a good idea, though... I mean, people say you won't die from a little bit of banter, right? 🙄

I suppose I should address what Brenda Doyle5 said earlier. It’s an interesting perspective, though perhaps a bit... optimistic? If that's even the right word for it. I find myself wondering if we are all looking at the same set of facts, or if we've just collectively decided to ignore the obvious inconsistencies. Maybe I'm being too cynical. It's possible. But then again, history usually suggests otherwise, doesn't it? Anyway, moving on.

I suppose I should probably mention that things have been... well, let's just say they haven't been particularly smooth lately. I guess there isn't much point in dwelling on it, though. Perhaps. It feels like everything is shifting underfoot, almost like trying to build something on quicksand, if that makes any sense. I might be overthinking it, but I can't help feeling that certain patterns are repeating themselves, even when we try our best to avoid them. It’s a bit exhausting, honestly. Not that I’m complaining—not really—but it is quite a lot to process all at once. Anyway, I'll get to the point eventually. I think. [Username] says: It is quite a peculiar sensation, I suppose, when you find yourself anticipating one thing only to be met with the exact opposite. It’s rather taxing on the nerves. First, you're expecting a girl, and now, after all that, it seems you'll have to wait all over again to finally get a daughter. It is a bit much, I guess. 🙂

Greetings. 😍
My situation is... well, it’s a bit different, I suppose. I already have a son, and now I’m nine weeks along with my next. It hasn't even been that long, but the comments have already started rolling in. People are always saying things like, "Oh, if only you were having a girl this time since you already have a boy," or, "And if it turns out to be another boy, well, I guess you'll just have to live with it—as long as the baby is healthy, right?" I guess they think they're being helpful, or maybe they don't realize how repetitive it all sounds. It's just... a lot. 🙂

I have my ultrasound on January 17th, which should finally settle the gender question. Everyone is already rooting for a boy since we have a daughter at home. Honestly, they were all cheering until I lost my temper and shut them down—told them we really don't care what it is. If it’s a boy, we’ll have a pair; if it’s a girl, Dad will just be outnumbered by women. So where does that leave us?
It’s infuriating how quickly I get winded after the slightest effort. It feels like I can't even catch my breath, and even sneezing feels like a sharp jab to the gut. I remember this happening during my first pregnancy too.
And I can't wrap my head around how my appetite can flip from "completely stuffed" to "starving wolf" in under five minutes.
By the way, everyone around me won't stop pushing name suggestions. My husband and I have pretty much agreed on something, but there’s always someone chiming in with a comment or mentioning some acquaintance with that name who was apparently a nightmare. It's exhausting.
It also irritates me how I can fly off the handle over nothing in a split second. It's a mess.

Michelle Sanchez11 said:I suppose I should address what Brenda Doyle5 said earlier. It’s an interesting perspective, though perhaps a bit... optimistic? If that's even the right word for it. I find myself wondering if we are all looking at the same set of facts, or if we've just collectively decided to ignore the obvious inconsistencies. Maybe I'm being too cynical. It's possible. But then again, history usually suggests otherwise, doesn't it? Anyway, moving on.

I suppose I should probably mention that things have been... well, let's just say they haven't been particularly smooth lately. I guess there isn't much point in dwelling on it, though. Perhaps. It feels like everything is shifting underfoot, almost like trying to build something on quicksand, if that makes any sense. I might be overthinking it, but I can't help feeling that certain patterns are repeating themselves, even when we try our best to avoid them. It’s a bit exhausting, honestly. Not that I’m complaining—not really—but it is quite a lot to process all at once. Anyway, I'll get to the point eventually. I think. [Username] says: It is quite a peculiar sensation, I suppose, when you find yourself anticipating one thing only to be met with the exact opposite. It’s rather taxing on the nerves. First, you're expecting a girl, and now, after all that, it seems you'll have to wait all over again to finally get a daughter. It is a bit much, I guess. 🙂

Greetings. 😍
My situation is... well, it’s a bit different, I suppose. I already have a son, and now I’m nine weeks along with my next. It hasn't even been that long, but the comments have already started rolling in. People are always saying things like, "Oh, if only you were having a girl this time since you already have a boy," or, "And if it turns out to be another boy, well, I guess you'll just have to live with it—as long as the baby is healthy, right?" I guess they think they're being helpful, or maybe they don't realize how repetitive it all sounds. It's just... a lot. 🙂

It was similar for me.
When we mentioned it was our second girl, everyone was thrilled—"Oh, that's wonderful, we're so happy, you'll have a daughter and a son." 😍 🙄
Frankly, who cares? I am happy whether it is two boys, two girls, or any other combination. 😍
Everyone wants to know the name, too. I won't say I ignore the comments, but I simply tell them they will find out when the baby is born.
People always have an opinion on everything, yet nobody asks. 🙄

To add to that—a neighbor congratulated us on the New Year the other day and wished us well, then proceeded to ramble about how her daughter-in-law also has a due date near mine. She claimed it’s much harder for her because she has a three-year-old girl and another baby coming, whereas my child will be seven by then, making it "easy." As if she could have just waited another three or four years to make it easy for herself. 🙄
If I had been able to do it sooner, the age gap wouldn't have mattered as much.

shadowrider28 said:I simply could not remain silent in the face of such comments regarding young girls.

While I haven’t yet had the distinct honor of welcoming more little ones into my own family, let me be perfectly clear: if I find myself blessed with another daughter and someone dares to even hint at such nonsense, I shall have a very sharp retort ready to fire. 🙂

I would likely lose my mind too if someone said something like that to me. 🙂

However, I frequently find myself being subjected to those "oh-so-well-meaning" suggestions, only to eventually snap and give everyone the "get out of my house" look because people insist I shouldn't get angry or stressed—which is apparently bad for the baby. aaaaaaa! 🙂

feralgardener11 said:It was similar for me.
When we mentioned it was our second girl, everyone was thrilled—"Oh, that's wonderful, we're so happy, you'll have a daughter and a son." 😍 🙄
Frankly, who cares? I am happy whether it is two boys, two girls, or any other combination. 😍
Everyone wants to know the name, too. I won't say I ignore the comments, but I simply tell them they will find out when the baby is born.
People always have an opinion on everything, yet nobody asks. 🙄

To add to that—a neighbor congratulated us on the New Year the other day and wished us well, then proceeded to ramble about how her daughter-in-law also has a due date near mine. She claimed it’s much harder for her because she has a three-year-old girl and another baby coming, whereas my child will be seven by then, making it "easy." As if she could have just waited another three or four years to make it easy for herself. 🙄
If I had been able to do it sooner, the age gap wouldn't have mattered as much.

I forgot to mention that the mass reaction from most people was that it was too early and we should have waited. Thank you, but the baby is healthy, I am healthy, we aren't teenagers, and we aren't living under a bridge, so please continue lecturing me on how we could have waited for the stars to align differently...

brighttiger6 said:I would likely lose my mind too if someone said something like that to me. 🙂

However, I frequently find myself being subjected to those "oh-so-well-meaning" suggestions, only to eventually snap and give everyone the "get out of my house" look because people insist I shouldn't get angry or stressed—which is apparently bad for the baby. aaaaaaa! 🙂

I forgot to mention that the mass reaction from most people was that it was too early and we should have waited. Thank you, but the baby is healthy, I am healthy, we aren't teenagers, and we aren't living under a bridge, so please continue lecturing me on how we could have waited for the stars to align differently...

Pete, what’s the age gap usually like where you are? Around here, it’s barely two years. (My due date is actually a week before my daughter’s second birthday)

OFF-TOPIC: A prime example of how you can never win with people: you know those standard questions when you already have one kid? "So, when are you having the next one?"
Well, I used to answer, "We're working on it..." only to get comments like, "Isn't that a bit too early? Won't the age gap be too small?"
Some people are just impossible to satisfy...
And since we wanted a small gap, it took us nine months to conceive this little one, whereas it took nearly two years for our first daughter... so if I had actually listened to those critics, I would have been stuck waiting forever.

Hello everyone 👋

I’m currently twenty-two weeks along. I’ve been lucky enough to dodge the morning sickness and those constant bathroom trips, but unfortunately, I haven't escaped the tingling sensations in my hands. It’s become quite a struggle; I often wake up around 5:00 AM feeling such intense numbness that it’s hard to even touch them—it feels more like a sharp, stinging pain than anything else. Even trying to stretch things out doesn't help; if anything, it just makes the discomfort worse. My husband, Jim, keeps telling me there isn't much to be done and that everything should settle down naturally after the baby arrives...

To be honest, I'm finding it incredibly frustrating when my mother-in-law insists on rubbing my belly, and today, she even went as far as giving it her very first kiss. I was just left 🤷

Mark Lopez14 said:Hello everyone 👋

I’m currently twenty-two weeks along. I’ve been lucky enough to dodge the morning sickness and those constant bathroom trips, but unfortunately, I haven't escaped the tingling sensations in my hands. It’s become quite a struggle; I often wake up around 5:00 AM feeling such intense numbness that it’s hard to even touch them—it feels more like a sharp, stinging pain than anything else. Even trying to stretch things out doesn't help; if anything, it just makes the discomfort worse. My husband, Jim, keeps telling me there isn't much to be done and that everything should settle down naturally after the baby arrives...

To be honest, I'm finding it incredibly frustrating when my mother-in-law insists on rubbing my belly, and today, she even went as far as giving it her very first kiss. I was just left 🤷

Squeezing and releasing my fist seems to help a bit 🤷

A neighbor got under my skin today, too. She suggested it was selfish of me to keep working until the very end instead of stopping now 🙂🙂🙂
I guess she thinks I should just wait for complications to arise, even though everything is fine so far... 🤷☕

wanderinghawk said:Squeezing and releasing my fist seems to help a bit 🤷

A neighbor got under my skin today, too. She suggested it was selfish of me to keep working until the very end instead of stopping now 🙂🙂🙂
I guess she thinks I should just wait for complications to arise, even though everything is fine so far... 🤷☕

Yeah, totally selfish to actually want to work. 🙄
My sister-in-law said the exact same thing to me. She actually cut her maternity leave short because she was worried about her spot at her corporate job, and she didn't even go for a second pregnancy for that same reason. ☕
It's always so easy to judge someone else's life from the sidelines.

wanderinghawk said:Squeezing and releasing my fist seems to help a bit 🤷

A neighbor got under my skin today, too. She suggested it was selfish of me to keep working until the very end instead of stopping now 🙂🙂🙂
I guess she thinks I should just wait for complications to arise, even though everything is fine so far... 🤷☕

So, is this neighbor planning on covering the gap in your paycheck while you're out on maternity leave or something? 🙄

Look, if a doctor orders bed rest, that’s the end of the conversation, period. But if everything is feeling fine, why wouldn't you keep working through those last few weeks before the baby arrives? Of course, that’s assuming you aren't doing some heavy lifting at a warehouse or something, because 🤷 honestly, I think I’d lose my mind if I were stuck sitting around doing nothing...

Every single damn day at the office, my coworkers hit me with the same questions—are you still here? Are you still working? Just go home already. Then I get lectured by women who probably rushed off to maternity leave while their legs were still shaking from sex. Look, if they’re going to pay me the difference in my salary, I don't care. I'm sticking it out until the end of the month because I want to use up some old vacation days, but I'm not digging coal in a mine. It's an office job, and there's no reason I shouldn't be here. I'm not sick.

Right? It’s like it suddenly became shameful to work as much as possible instead of the other way around! I’ve actually had people judge me for wanting to power through my work right up until maternity leave, assuming everything goes smoothly. I totally feel for women dealing with actual medical complications or those in jobs that just aren't safe for pregnancy—that kind of judgment is totally misplaced. But honestly, why shouldn't I work while I can? Sure, I've got my moments where I'm feeling achy, or the baby starts kicking and I lose focus, or I'm tossing and turning at night, but I'm still in the zone! Why stop now?