Welcome to the Coast!
in Philosophy ·
Look, we don't always see eye to eye, but at the end of the day, we're on the same page! 🙂
May the Force be with you!😉
May the Force be with you!😉
Home ›
Paul Campbell3 › Posts
Posts by Paul Campbell3
307 posts shown.
Witches Online - New Generation, 6
in Spirituality ·
Man, do I need to hang a sign out front that says "No Snakes Allowed!"?😁 😁 😉
Witches Online - New Generation, 6
in Spirituality ·
Back in my garden again today. It’s been bone-dry this year; they say we haven't seen a drought like this since 1958.
I was hauling water from the well like usual, and man, this ground just keeps thirsting for more. "It never ends," I thought to myself..🙂
But hey, the work paid off. I can already see the first little sprouts peeking through, even though the seeds only went under the dirt a few days ago?!
I guess there really is something to those little rituals—singing to the soil and talking to the earth..😉 Now I'm sitting here wondering why I'm acting such a fool, playing the part of unfaithful Thomas..😁
On the drive home, I fired up the car. I’d accidentally bumped the radio over to an NPR station because the static from the nearby woods was driving me crazy. I was about to change the dial immediately because the announcer was just rambling on, but I paused halfway to hunt for some music.. then the woman said something "magical":"And so, on the other side of the garden, lived a slender, beautiful lemon tree."
Well, there I am, having just left my own garden, while this woman on a radio station I don't even listen to is telling a story about a garden.. A smile just flashed across my face, and for the first time, I decided to actually listen to what she had to say instead of just blasting some tunes..🙂
Want me to tell you the story? Fine, I'll give it my best shot. I didn't catch the beginning, but the ending was enough for me to reconstruct the whole thing:
"In one garden lived a beautiful lettuce. On the far side of the garden lived a handsome lemon tree. Slender, with magnificent branches and fragrant fruit.
After just a few moments, it became clear to everyone that the lettuce and the lemon had been tenderly in love for years.
You might ask how it's possible for them to love each other when they're on opposite sides of the garden? Did their roots intertwine? Do forgetful butterflies carry their love notes and sighs back and forth?
No..
By human standards, a love like that is hard to grasp. But...
Every single time, they would unite in a salad bowl.
Their passionate embraces would mingle there, where all their longing and sighs were finally brought together.
First, a strong woman—the mistress of the house—would harvest the finest, freshest lettuce leaves, and then she’d pick the juiciest, ripest lemon. She’d squeeze half of it and slice the other half. Then she’d toss it all together in a bowl with a few drops of olive oil. Sometimes, a stubborn egg, a radish, or an onion would join the wedding feast of lettuce and lemon. And sometimes, they loved each other all alone.
It goes without saying that the children of that household were rosy-cheeked, healthy, and happy. So, that’s the garden tale of the tender love between the beautiful lettuce and the slender lemon prince."🙂
Maybe I'm just being totally delusional, but on the way home, I couldn't shake this vague smile from my face. My fingernails were stained black with dirt, my scratched-up legs were pressing down on the gas pedal, and every pore in my body was screaming for a shower, but in that moment, I was just completely and foolishly happy... It's funny how little it takes to feel happy, yet people always say that's exactly what we're missing most often..
Anyway, enough of that. Time to get serious..
I was hauling water from the well like usual, and man, this ground just keeps thirsting for more. "It never ends," I thought to myself..🙂
But hey, the work paid off. I can already see the first little sprouts peeking through, even though the seeds only went under the dirt a few days ago?!
I guess there really is something to those little rituals—singing to the soil and talking to the earth..😉 Now I'm sitting here wondering why I'm acting such a fool, playing the part of unfaithful Thomas..😁
On the drive home, I fired up the car. I’d accidentally bumped the radio over to an NPR station because the static from the nearby woods was driving me crazy. I was about to change the dial immediately because the announcer was just rambling on, but I paused halfway to hunt for some music.. then the woman said something "magical":"And so, on the other side of the garden, lived a slender, beautiful lemon tree."
Well, there I am, having just left my own garden, while this woman on a radio station I don't even listen to is telling a story about a garden.. A smile just flashed across my face, and for the first time, I decided to actually listen to what she had to say instead of just blasting some tunes..🙂
Want me to tell you the story? Fine, I'll give it my best shot. I didn't catch the beginning, but the ending was enough for me to reconstruct the whole thing:
"In one garden lived a beautiful lettuce. On the far side of the garden lived a handsome lemon tree. Slender, with magnificent branches and fragrant fruit.
After just a few moments, it became clear to everyone that the lettuce and the lemon had been tenderly in love for years.
You might ask how it's possible for them to love each other when they're on opposite sides of the garden? Did their roots intertwine? Do forgetful butterflies carry their love notes and sighs back and forth?
No..
By human standards, a love like that is hard to grasp. But...
Every single time, they would unite in a salad bowl.
Their passionate embraces would mingle there, where all their longing and sighs were finally brought together.
First, a strong woman—the mistress of the house—would harvest the finest, freshest lettuce leaves, and then she’d pick the juiciest, ripest lemon. She’d squeeze half of it and slice the other half. Then she’d toss it all together in a bowl with a few drops of olive oil. Sometimes, a stubborn egg, a radish, or an onion would join the wedding feast of lettuce and lemon. And sometimes, they loved each other all alone.
It goes without saying that the children of that household were rosy-cheeked, healthy, and happy. So, that’s the garden tale of the tender love between the beautiful lettuce and the slender lemon prince."🙂
Maybe I'm just being totally delusional, but on the way home, I couldn't shake this vague smile from my face. My fingernails were stained black with dirt, my scratched-up legs were pressing down on the gas pedal, and every pore in my body was screaming for a shower, but in that moment, I was just completely and foolishly happy... It's funny how little it takes to feel happy, yet people always say that's exactly what we're missing most often..
Anyway, enough of that. Time to get serious..
Witches Online: Pirate Edition
in Spirituality ·
Jiz!😲
You were totally right, I completely missed that fox...😁 😁 😉
Next time I really need to pay attention to what I'm actually typing..😉
You were totally right, I completely missed that fox...😁 😁 😉
Next time I really need to pay attention to what I'm actually typing..😉
Witches Online - New Generation, 6
in Spirituality ·
Well, the moment has finally arrived.
The plot is split right down the middle, then each half is broken into three mounds, and every mound holds three garden beds.
Why? Honestly, I have no clue. Just intuition. It’s always like this—you do something purely on instinct and then spend the rest of your time trying to figure out why you did it.
It was a gorgeous day. The wind was howling through the trees in the nearby woods with enough force to create this incredible, natural musical backdrop.
Once the usual prep work was done, it was time to get planting. Showing the seeds to the sun, letting them catch the breeze, covering them with soil, and finishing off with plenty of water.
Here was the lineup:
Basil first. My absolute favorite.
Then sage next to it. Or wait, if I can even find any...
Under the basil goes mint; under the sage, thyme; and finally, oregano.
One mound stayed empty for now. That one is reserved for lemongrass. I’m having a bit of a hard time tracking down some good seedlings, but I’ll figure it out eventually.
Watering was an entire production in itself. I had to haul water up from the well nearby. Look, it’s not rocket science, but when you consider the garden is perched on a hill, the well is about 300 meters down, and I’m hiking back and forth ten times carrying a bucket that's basically half my body weight... yeah, those beads of sweat running down my back were totally justified.😁
Thank God there's music to keep me going; it makes everything easier. And hey, I realized that learning how to sling a heavy bucket is actually an art form with its own set of rules.
Like I said before, thank God for the intelligence and the raw instincts our ancestors left deep inside us.😉
Once the work was finished, I just sat there and soaked in what I’d accomplished. Sure, the garden looks a little bit like a collection of hills—edged with brick and stone and shaped in a pretty weird way—but to me, it’s absolutely beautiful. 🙂
Oh, and one more thing I learned: weeding is a hell of a lot easier if you scrape the surface grass away with a hoe first.😁 😉
For about a year now, I’ve been obsessed with almond trees. If anyone reading these travelogues from a self-taught gardener knows where to pick up some almond nursery starts, I would be more than grateful.🙏
Big hug for all!😉
The plot is split right down the middle, then each half is broken into three mounds, and every mound holds three garden beds.
Why? Honestly, I have no clue. Just intuition. It’s always like this—you do something purely on instinct and then spend the rest of your time trying to figure out why you did it.
It was a gorgeous day. The wind was howling through the trees in the nearby woods with enough force to create this incredible, natural musical backdrop.
Once the usual prep work was done, it was time to get planting. Showing the seeds to the sun, letting them catch the breeze, covering them with soil, and finishing off with plenty of water.
Here was the lineup:
Basil first. My absolute favorite.
Then sage next to it. Or wait, if I can even find any...
Under the basil goes mint; under the sage, thyme; and finally, oregano.
One mound stayed empty for now. That one is reserved for lemongrass. I’m having a bit of a hard time tracking down some good seedlings, but I’ll figure it out eventually.
Watering was an entire production in itself. I had to haul water up from the well nearby. Look, it’s not rocket science, but when you consider the garden is perched on a hill, the well is about 300 meters down, and I’m hiking back and forth ten times carrying a bucket that's basically half my body weight... yeah, those beads of sweat running down my back were totally justified.😁
Thank God there's music to keep me going; it makes everything easier. And hey, I realized that learning how to sling a heavy bucket is actually an art form with its own set of rules.
Like I said before, thank God for the intelligence and the raw instincts our ancestors left deep inside us.😉
Once the work was finished, I just sat there and soaked in what I’d accomplished. Sure, the garden looks a little bit like a collection of hills—edged with brick and stone and shaped in a pretty weird way—but to me, it’s absolutely beautiful. 🙂
Oh, and one more thing I learned: weeding is a hell of a lot easier if you scrape the surface grass away with a hoe first.😁 😉
For about a year now, I’ve been obsessed with almond trees. If anyone reading these travelogues from a self-taught gardener knows where to pick up some almond nursery starts, I would be more than grateful.🙏
Big hug for all!😉
Witches Online - New Generation, 6
in Spirituality ·
We finally pulled it off. My friends and I. Friends? That feels like too weak a word for what ties us together. But anything else would just sound pretentious.
Backpacks on, we’re trekking toward that little cabin tucked between three hills. Nobody’s lived there for years.
It’ll be about an hour of easy walking to get there. We should arrive sometime late in the afternoon. We could have driven, sure. But today, we decided to cut out the modern comforts and civilization as much as possible.
Once we gather some stones, we’ll set them in a circle and fill the center with kindling. It burns best at the start while the fire is still catching.
Sitting around the flames, we’ll talk about the usual stuff. About us. Our lives, our cravings, our hopes, our failures, all our stupid mistakes. We’re all young, yet somehow we feel older than some of the oldest folks on this planet. We act as mirrors for one another; finally sitting by the fire, we're just staring at our own reflections.
I’m going to toss some couscous into a pot over the fire: just three handfuls, enough to lightly toast until it turns that golden color.
The meal is a ritual. One of us prepares the food and pours their own energy into it. This time, it’s me. So, I’m making sure my thoughts stay clear and happy. I want to feel nothing but warmth and gratitude for being here with my people. Because honestly, I might not have made it.
I’ll pour in a steady stream of milk. It’ll take a minute for the porridge to thicken. Sage and thyme are already waiting on the side, along with a cinnamon stick. Everything is freshly picked—except the cinnamon, obviously. You add the spices at the very end, once the pot is off the heat. Let it sit for a bit, then serve. The aroma stays with you.
I’ll grab the bowls and divvy it up evenly. For toppings, we’ve got honey, brown sugar, and chocolate chips. Just grab what you want.
Night has already fallen. We’re pulling risen dough from the cellar. The edge of the fire is nothing but embers and ash now. Perfect for shaping little rolls and burying them deep in the coals.
First, we eat the porridge. Our mouths are full of gratitude. There is nothing sweeter than eating with the people you love.
"You are what you eat." In my opinion, that’s a phrase that gets misinterpreted way too often. It’s not about the specific food; it’s about *how* you eat.
Food is something material that we created with our own hands in this world. By turning a meal into a ritual, we can consecrate it and breathe a certain spirit into it. That spirit comes back to us generously after digestion. Whatever state of mind was present during the prep and the eating is exactly what will wash over us once those ingredients settle.
Everyone will shape their own rolls and shove them into the ash and embers. It’s no wonder that "naked chef" type guy became so famous on TV. He finally dared to strip away the myth of sterile food prep and actually inject soul into the process. Our hands are stained black and gray, just like that.
Water is boiling in the kettle for tea. We haven't decided on the blend yet. Shadows are dancing across our faces. Every single one of us has eyes that glow with an inner fire.
The conversation will drift toward how modern life has alienated people from themselves. How the ignorance behind food preparation is a direct cause of the obesity epidemic sweeping through the population. It isn't about *what* you eat, it's about *how* you eat. Personally, I don't divide people into meat-eaters and vegetarians; I divide them into those who know how to eat and those who don't.
What's the point of calorie counting and "healthy food" if the preparation remains the same—rushed and mindless? It feels like it's being forced on us that one meaningful, conscious meal is better than seven calorie-balanced snacks shoved down your throat in a hurry.
Hmm, maybe some music now? Should we make it ourselves, or just put on a CD?
Backpacks on, we’re trekking toward that little cabin tucked between three hills. Nobody’s lived there for years.
It’ll be about an hour of easy walking to get there. We should arrive sometime late in the afternoon. We could have driven, sure. But today, we decided to cut out the modern comforts and civilization as much as possible.
Once we gather some stones, we’ll set them in a circle and fill the center with kindling. It burns best at the start while the fire is still catching.
Sitting around the flames, we’ll talk about the usual stuff. About us. Our lives, our cravings, our hopes, our failures, all our stupid mistakes. We’re all young, yet somehow we feel older than some of the oldest folks on this planet. We act as mirrors for one another; finally sitting by the fire, we're just staring at our own reflections.
I’m going to toss some couscous into a pot over the fire: just three handfuls, enough to lightly toast until it turns that golden color.
The meal is a ritual. One of us prepares the food and pours their own energy into it. This time, it’s me. So, I’m making sure my thoughts stay clear and happy. I want to feel nothing but warmth and gratitude for being here with my people. Because honestly, I might not have made it.
I’ll pour in a steady stream of milk. It’ll take a minute for the porridge to thicken. Sage and thyme are already waiting on the side, along with a cinnamon stick. Everything is freshly picked—except the cinnamon, obviously. You add the spices at the very end, once the pot is off the heat. Let it sit for a bit, then serve. The aroma stays with you.
I’ll grab the bowls and divvy it up evenly. For toppings, we’ve got honey, brown sugar, and chocolate chips. Just grab what you want.
Night has already fallen. We’re pulling risen dough from the cellar. The edge of the fire is nothing but embers and ash now. Perfect for shaping little rolls and burying them deep in the coals.
First, we eat the porridge. Our mouths are full of gratitude. There is nothing sweeter than eating with the people you love.
"You are what you eat." In my opinion, that’s a phrase that gets misinterpreted way too often. It’s not about the specific food; it’s about *how* you eat.
Food is something material that we created with our own hands in this world. By turning a meal into a ritual, we can consecrate it and breathe a certain spirit into it. That spirit comes back to us generously after digestion. Whatever state of mind was present during the prep and the eating is exactly what will wash over us once those ingredients settle.
Everyone will shape their own rolls and shove them into the ash and embers. It’s no wonder that "naked chef" type guy became so famous on TV. He finally dared to strip away the myth of sterile food prep and actually inject soul into the process. Our hands are stained black and gray, just like that.
Water is boiling in the kettle for tea. We haven't decided on the blend yet. Shadows are dancing across our faces. Every single one of us has eyes that glow with an inner fire.
The conversation will drift toward how modern life has alienated people from themselves. How the ignorance behind food preparation is a direct cause of the obesity epidemic sweeping through the population. It isn't about *what* you eat, it's about *how* you eat. Personally, I don't divide people into meat-eaters and vegetarians; I divide them into those who know how to eat and those who don't.
What's the point of calorie counting and "healthy food" if the preparation remains the same—rushed and mindless? It feels like it's being forced on us that one meaningful, conscious meal is better than seven calorie-balanced snacks shoved down your throat in a hurry.
Hmm, maybe some music now? Should we make it ourselves, or just put on a CD?
Witches Online: Pirate Edition
in Spirituality ·
Just make sure the hunter doesn't end up becoming the prey...😁 😁 😁 😛 😉
Witches Online - New Generation, 6
in Spirituality ·
There it is. Stopped by my little patch of future homegrown remedies for the masses today.
The land is sleeping soundly. Honestly, just looking at it felt peaceful. It’s soaking up the sun and feeding on all that rich, organic compost.
Let it rest for a bit longer. I'll be back out there swinging the hoe soon enough.
Just for a minute, though. Then it's straight to using the rakes to get those garden beds looking perfect.
Anyway.
Time to focus on the seeds. I need to tell them a story. A different one for every single one.
But that’ll have to wait until the new moon.🙂
The land is sleeping soundly. Honestly, just looking at it felt peaceful. It’s soaking up the sun and feeding on all that rich, organic compost.
Let it rest for a bit longer. I'll be back out there swinging the hoe soon enough.
Just for a minute, though. Then it's straight to using the rakes to get those garden beds looking perfect.
Anyway.
Time to focus on the seeds. I need to tell them a story. A different one for every single one.
But that’ll have to wait until the new moon.🙂
Witches Online: Pirate Edition
in Spirituality ·
Where's everybody gone? Just vanished into thin air...😁
forest
So how do Bulgarians handle it
spring festivals in the USA
forest
So how do Bulgarians handle it
spring festivals in the USA
Witches Online: Pirate Edition
in Spirituality ·
Good grief!😲
What is wrong with people lately...🙄 😁 😈
What is wrong with people lately...🙄 😁 😈
Witches Online - New Generation, 6
in Spirituality ·
Ugh, it was freezing out, and I’m already wired at a hundred miles an hour... but hey, the land doesn't care how I feel.
So, off I go with two bags of cow manure ready to work the soil. Didn't go solo this time, which kind of killed the vibe, but whatever—not going to lose sleep over it.
Spread the manure and dug back into the earth. Honestly? It exhausted me and cleared my head instantly. This wasn't some formal ritual today, but it felt necessary.
I paused for a second just staring up at the gray sky, eyes closed, trying to pick out the birdsong. It hit me again—my plot faces west. I love the west. I just instinctively gravitate toward it. Then I remembered Snake mentioned that altars at Witta face west... and even with Native Americans... nothing is a coincidence. Just a thought while I swung the hoe into the ground again.
Such a beautiful spot. You won't find me here for the next week. Coming from a traditional Christian family, you have to follow certain rules, including the ban on working the land. It's "controlled madness." Like back in the days of the Inquisition, I have to hide what I'm doing from my own neighbors.😁 😉
Heading down the slope feeling good about the work done. Maybe I'll manage to steal an afternoon just to sneak away for a little chat with the land.
Now, time to focus on the seeds. 😉
Sole, 👋 👋 👋 👋
So, off I go with two bags of cow manure ready to work the soil. Didn't go solo this time, which kind of killed the vibe, but whatever—not going to lose sleep over it.
Spread the manure and dug back into the earth. Honestly? It exhausted me and cleared my head instantly. This wasn't some formal ritual today, but it felt necessary.
I paused for a second just staring up at the gray sky, eyes closed, trying to pick out the birdsong. It hit me again—my plot faces west. I love the west. I just instinctively gravitate toward it. Then I remembered Snake mentioned that altars at Witta face west... and even with Native Americans... nothing is a coincidence. Just a thought while I swung the hoe into the ground again.
Such a beautiful spot. You won't find me here for the next week. Coming from a traditional Christian family, you have to follow certain rules, including the ban on working the land. It's "controlled madness." Like back in the days of the Inquisition, I have to hide what I'm doing from my own neighbors.😁 😉
Heading down the slope feeling good about the work done. Maybe I'll manage to steal an afternoon just to sneak away for a little chat with the land.
Now, time to focus on the seeds. 😉
Sole, 👋 👋 👋 👋
Witches Online: Pirate Edition
in Spirituality ·
Damn witches!😁
What I didn't even have the guts to put in writing in my last post just spilled right out of your filthy mouth...😁 😉
That sweet, metallic tang of warm blood slowly drying on your lips—that single drop hanging off your bottom lip, defying gravity for just one more second... you catch it with your index finger and bring it back to your mouth at the very last moment...
And then every single cell in your body just screams. Your palate sends the impulse straight to the taste center, which fires back to the palate and every other cell in your body. Eyes closed. And from some primal depth deep within your gut, there’s this roar from all those ancestors who danced around the campfire, bowing to Mother Earth and the raw energy of the flames—that orange-yellow glow that woke up the forgotten instincts of the hunter. It's about respect for the kill. Without that, a hunter isn't anything at all...
What I didn't even have the guts to put in writing in my last post just spilled right out of your filthy mouth...😁 😉
That sweet, metallic tang of warm blood slowly drying on your lips—that single drop hanging off your bottom lip, defying gravity for just one more second... you catch it with your index finger and bring it back to your mouth at the very last moment...
And then every single cell in your body just screams. Your palate sends the impulse straight to the taste center, which fires back to the palate and every other cell in your body. Eyes closed. And from some primal depth deep within your gut, there’s this roar from all those ancestors who danced around the campfire, bowing to Mother Earth and the raw energy of the flames—that orange-yellow glow that woke up the forgotten instincts of the hunter. It's about respect for the kill. Without that, a hunter isn't anything at all...
Witches Online: Pirate Edition
in Spirituality ·
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAghhhhhhh!
I'm just kidding; I’m gonna round you all up, line you up around the campfire, tie you to a stake, and snap your necks... and honestly? I'll love every second of it..😁 nice and slow..😎
Look, I won't kill you or anything—I just want to sip on a little bit of your warm blood, maybe catch a few drops..
It's like some evil spirit has totally taken over my body..😁 😁
Better call an exorcist, ASAP..😁
I'm just kidding; I’m gonna round you all up, line you up around the campfire, tie you to a stake, and snap your necks... and honestly? I'll love every second of it..😁 nice and slow..😎
Look, I won't kill you or anything—I just want to sip on a little bit of your warm blood, maybe catch a few drops..
It's like some evil spirit has totally taken over my body..😁 😁
Better call an exorcist, ASAP..😁
Witches Online: Pirate Edition
in Spirituality ·
Dammit, Alexander Parker69 is such a tool; the one who actually threw me off my game was that girl!🙂
I don't think I'm really feeling the whole marrying a woman thing right now...😁
So, yeah, I think I'm gonna play after all.😁 😉
I don't think I'm really feeling the whole marrying a woman thing right now...😁
So, yeah, I think I'm gonna play after all.😁 😉
Witches Online: Pirate Edition
in Spirituality ·
Scream
It doesn't matter, it really doesn't. The real issue is I can't tell if I'm more pissed off at that person or just at myself..😁 😁
I'm leaning towards the second one... man, being an artist is a rough road..😁
But honestly? With these bloodthirsty urges kicking in, I actually feel pretty okay..😁
If only there were a willing victim nearby..
Hmm, let me paint a picture for you: right now, I’d be dancing around a bonfire with a spear in hand, smearing myself in the hot blood of a freshly sacrificed fox, scrawling symbols on my thighs with charcoal, screaming my head off, and then finally sinking my teeth into someone's neck.. just enough to feel something..
😲
I can't believe I actually just wrote that..
Time to go toe-to-toe with myself..😁
It doesn't matter, it really doesn't. The real issue is I can't tell if I'm more pissed off at that person or just at myself..😁 😁
I'm leaning towards the second one... man, being an artist is a rough road..😁
But honestly? With these bloodthirsty urges kicking in, I actually feel pretty okay..😁
If only there were a willing victim nearby..
Hmm, let me paint a picture for you: right now, I’d be dancing around a bonfire with a spear in hand, smearing myself in the hot blood of a freshly sacrificed fox, scrawling symbols on my thighs with charcoal, screaming my head off, and then finally sinking my teeth into someone's neck.. just enough to feel something..
😲
I can't believe I actually just wrote that..
Time to go toe-to-toe with myself..😁
Witches Online: Pirate Edition
in Spirituality ·
Alright, I’m giving a massive public shout-out to Lame Deer, the witch, and briskrider8 because they actually had me laughing until I cried. But hey, every silver lining has a cloud, right? Now I’ve gotta figure out something to deal with this stomach ache.😁
Even though I managed to crack a smile today, I’m still incredibly pissed off and honestly feel like choking someone.
If there’s someone in your life who just absolutely gets under your skin, you can discreetly hit me up via PM using the code "choking bare hand."
At this rate, I'll be running on empty soon.😁 😁
Even though I managed to crack a smile today, I’m still incredibly pissed off and honestly feel like choking someone.
If there’s someone in your life who just absolutely gets under your skin, you can discreetly hit me up via PM using the code "choking bare hand."
At this rate, I'll be running on empty soon.😁 😁
Witches Online: Pirate Edition
in Spirituality ·
The Tourism Australia website gets hit with some seriously ridiculous questions. Honestly, I eventually just lost my patience and told the Aussies to stop bothering them with every little thing, and well... here's what happened.
A question from the United Kingdom.Does the wind ever actually blow in Australia? I swear, I’ve never seen a single drop of rain on TV, so now I’m wondering how the hell anything even grows over there...
Answer.We’re basically importing these plants fully grown, just sitting around watching them die on us. What a joke.
Question from the USA.Am I gonna see goats just wandering around the streets?
AnswerDepends entirely on how much you've had to drink.
A question from Sweden.I want to walk the distance from Seattle to New York City. Can I just follow the railroad tracks the whole way?
ResponseSeriously, that’s only 3,000 miles. Pack some extra water or something...
Question from SwedenIs it even safe to go running through the brush in Australia?
Answer.So, it turns out everything people say about you Swedes is actually true...
Question from ItalyI need names and addresses. Now. I need someone I can actually contact regarding that taxidermied porcupine. This is vital.
AnswerWe’re not touching this. Period.
A question from the United Kingdom.Does Australia even have ATMs? Can someone just shoot me a list of every single ATM in Miami, Key West, Mobile, and Savannah if they actually exist?
ResponseSo, what killed your last slave?
Question from the USA.Can anyone give me the lowdown on Nil horse racing in Australia?
ResponseAfrica is this massive triangular continent sitting right south of Europe. Then you've got Australia, that huge island sitting out in the middle of the Pacific Ocean where there isn't... well, whatever. Anyway, they hold Nile horse races every single Tuesday night down in Times Square. Entry is free for nudists, so just show up naked.
Question from the USA.Where exactly is north in Australia? Seriously, what kind of question is that?
AnswerHead south and then take a hard right. Give us a call once you roll into town and we'll shoot over the rest of the directions.
A question from the United Kingdom.Can I bring a steak into Australia?
AnswerWhy? Just eat with your hands, just like the rest of us.
A question from the USA.Can someone please send me the tour schedule for those boys?
ResponseGermany is that charming little country right next door, which is... well, whatever. Anyway, a bunch of boys get together to sing every Tuesday night in Times Square, right after the greyhound races wrap up. Just show up naked—it's free for the nudists.
Question from France.Do you guys even have perfumes over in Australia?
AnswerNo, WE don't stink.
Question from America.I’ve cooked up a new product—basically a fountain of youth in a bottle. Where in Australia can I actually move this stuff? Any leads?
AnswerWherever you look, if there's a crowd of Americans, they're there.
Question from the United Kingdom.Can I wear high heels in Australia?
AnswerSo, you think you're some kind of British politician, huh? Is that the act you're going with?
Question from ItalyWhere exactly in Alaska am I going to find places where there are way fewer women than men?
AnswerYeah, specifically in the gay clubs.
Question from FranceSo, how do you guys handle Australian Christmas over there?
AnswerOnly on Christmas.
Question from Germany: Is there self-service in Australia, and can you buy milk all year round?
Nah, no way. We’re a peaceful civilization of vegan hunters and gatherers. Milk is illegal here.
Question from the US: Please send me a list of all the doctors in Australia who have rattlesnake antivenom in stock.
Listen, you snake charmers live in America—that's where you're coming from. Every single Australian snake is non-venomous, totally harmless, and easy to tame. Period.
Question from the States: I've got a question about this famous animal from Australia, but the name is totally slipping my mind. It's some kind of bear that lives up in trees.
Listen, they're called jump-bears. That’s the name. They leap straight out of the branches and rip the brains right out of anyone walking underneath. If you want to stay alive, just cover yourself in urine before you even start your hike. It keeps them away.
Question from the USA: I was in Australia back in 1969 on military leave, and I'm trying to track down a girl I used to see when I was hanging out in Times Square. Can anyone help me out?
Answer: Sure, but you'll still have to pay by the hour.
Question from the USA: Will I be able to get by speaking English in most of the places I'm planning to visit?
Answer: Yeah, but you're gonna have to learn it first.
😁 😁 😁 😁
A question from the United Kingdom.Does the wind ever actually blow in Australia? I swear, I’ve never seen a single drop of rain on TV, so now I’m wondering how the hell anything even grows over there...
Answer.We’re basically importing these plants fully grown, just sitting around watching them die on us. What a joke.
Question from the USA.Am I gonna see goats just wandering around the streets?
AnswerDepends entirely on how much you've had to drink.
A question from Sweden.I want to walk the distance from Seattle to New York City. Can I just follow the railroad tracks the whole way?
ResponseSeriously, that’s only 3,000 miles. Pack some extra water or something...
Question from SwedenIs it even safe to go running through the brush in Australia?
Answer.So, it turns out everything people say about you Swedes is actually true...
Question from ItalyI need names and addresses. Now. I need someone I can actually contact regarding that taxidermied porcupine. This is vital.
AnswerWe’re not touching this. Period.
A question from the United Kingdom.Does Australia even have ATMs? Can someone just shoot me a list of every single ATM in Miami, Key West, Mobile, and Savannah if they actually exist?
ResponseSo, what killed your last slave?
Question from the USA.Can anyone give me the lowdown on Nil horse racing in Australia?
ResponseAfrica is this massive triangular continent sitting right south of Europe. Then you've got Australia, that huge island sitting out in the middle of the Pacific Ocean where there isn't... well, whatever. Anyway, they hold Nile horse races every single Tuesday night down in Times Square. Entry is free for nudists, so just show up naked.
Question from the USA.Where exactly is north in Australia? Seriously, what kind of question is that?
AnswerHead south and then take a hard right. Give us a call once you roll into town and we'll shoot over the rest of the directions.
A question from the United Kingdom.Can I bring a steak into Australia?
AnswerWhy? Just eat with your hands, just like the rest of us.
A question from the USA.Can someone please send me the tour schedule for those boys?
ResponseGermany is that charming little country right next door, which is... well, whatever. Anyway, a bunch of boys get together to sing every Tuesday night in Times Square, right after the greyhound races wrap up. Just show up naked—it's free for the nudists.
Question from France.Do you guys even have perfumes over in Australia?
AnswerNo, WE don't stink.
Question from America.I’ve cooked up a new product—basically a fountain of youth in a bottle. Where in Australia can I actually move this stuff? Any leads?
AnswerWherever you look, if there's a crowd of Americans, they're there.
Question from the United Kingdom.Can I wear high heels in Australia?
AnswerSo, you think you're some kind of British politician, huh? Is that the act you're going with?
Question from ItalyWhere exactly in Alaska am I going to find places where there are way fewer women than men?
AnswerYeah, specifically in the gay clubs.
Question from FranceSo, how do you guys handle Australian Christmas over there?
AnswerOnly on Christmas.
Question from Germany: Is there self-service in Australia, and can you buy milk all year round?
Nah, no way. We’re a peaceful civilization of vegan hunters and gatherers. Milk is illegal here.
Question from the US: Please send me a list of all the doctors in Australia who have rattlesnake antivenom in stock.
Listen, you snake charmers live in America—that's where you're coming from. Every single Australian snake is non-venomous, totally harmless, and easy to tame. Period.
Question from the States: I've got a question about this famous animal from Australia, but the name is totally slipping my mind. It's some kind of bear that lives up in trees.
Listen, they're called jump-bears. That’s the name. They leap straight out of the branches and rip the brains right out of anyone walking underneath. If you want to stay alive, just cover yourself in urine before you even start your hike. It keeps them away.
Question from the USA: I was in Australia back in 1969 on military leave, and I'm trying to track down a girl I used to see when I was hanging out in Times Square. Can anyone help me out?
Answer: Sure, but you'll still have to pay by the hour.
Question from the USA: Will I be able to get by speaking English in most of the places I'm planning to visit?
Answer: Yeah, but you're gonna have to learn it first.
😁 😁 😁 😁
How to get rid of cellulite?
in Health ·
Look, Kenneth Hernandez67, that’s just not entirely true.
Usually, you'll find the leaves used in herbal tea blends to help with stuff like coughing, hoarseness, or congestion. If you're using the actual leaves in normal amounts—and I mean no more than two tablespoons of crushed leaves per liter of water, or just one crushed leaf if it's part of a blend—you aren't going to have any issues as long as you stick to those measurements. It’s the fruit that's toxic, so don't even think about using that under any circumstances.
Just to be safe, you shouldn't go on any treatment involving City for longer than two weeks.
Usually, you'll find the leaves used in herbal tea blends to help with stuff like coughing, hoarseness, or congestion. If you're using the actual leaves in normal amounts—and I mean no more than two tablespoons of crushed leaves per liter of water, or just one crushed leaf if it's part of a blend—you aren't going to have any issues as long as you stick to those measurements. It’s the fruit that's toxic, so don't even think about using that under any circumstances.
Just to be safe, you shouldn't go on any treatment involving City for longer than two weeks.
Sathya Sai Baba!
in Spirituality ·
Just find a way to reconcile those two paradoxes—your own awareness versus their total lack of it. See them as the most beautiful, natural part of being alive. Find the beauty in that friction and just live...🙂 🙂
How to get rid of cellulite?
in Health ·
Look, Andrew Anderson6, seriously, just chill out and stop taking everything so personally. Okay? It wasn't even aimed at you, it was directed at Person.😉
That thing about cinnamon is spot on; it actually irritates the skin if you apply it topically, which happens to most people. You should probably stay away from it or just use a tiny amount.
If you're out foraging in City, just keep in mind that the fruit is toxic.😉 Stick to the leaves.
That thing about cinnamon is spot on; it actually irritates the skin if you apply it topically, which happens to most people. You should probably stay away from it or just use a tiny amount.
If you're out foraging in City, just keep in mind that the fruit is toxic.😉 Stick to the leaves.