Posts by Gerald Ward61

Sean Cruz said:Fair point—he clearly isn't aware of just how unconscious he really is. 😁

Maybe a pack of Marlboro will finally snap him out of it... 😍

northernbadger12 said:I’m totally on board with what cosmictinker21 said 🤷 I mean, looking back at that friend mentioned at the start of the thread, I get the feeling he doesn't really let anyone get close to him emotionally. It’s like, every time I see him out on a date with someone, he just retreats into his own shell right after and starts obsessing over his old flame... it honestly feels like a defense mechanism to me, though I guess it's hard to say for sure

Maybe he really does love her, but if she isn't interested in being with him, I don't think it's a good idea to keep feeding into a one-sided relationship. It probably can't be healthy for his mental state, I guess 🙄

The right girl will come along and love him... please... oh man... seeing love at sixteen is something else... 😍

cosmictinker21 said:I'm sure she's stunning. Any woman truly in love has that kind of glow—eyes bright, just radiating everything... though I suppose that changes when the feeling isn't returned. It’s hard to keep that light when things feel heavy and fruitless...

No, we don't know the full story. We aren't here to pass judgment on anyone... we're just exploring the possibilities that emerge when love simply can't be realized the way it was meant to be...

I actually went through something like this myself, a few years back...
I’d put it this way: he was the one. My person. We were perfectly aligned on every single level—intellectually, spiritually, emotionally, physically... you name it. But there were serious, heavy reasons why things couldn't work out, both for me and for him. He understood that I simply don't do compromises. And if I had insisted on having things my way, he wouldn't have survived the toll it would have taken on him, mentally or physically. He probably would have ended up back in the hospital, dealing with plasma exchanges, immunosuppressants, steroids... the whole ordeal. He just wouldn't have made it through all that. He would have died. There was nothing I could have done to change that outcome. It's just a shame...

I’ll probably never run into another man I could love with that kind of intensity. It wasn't just about the romance; he actually made me feel whole. He enriched my life just by being there—his intellect, his subtlety, that deep spiritual connection... it was everything. We went through so many cycles, breaking up and trying again, over and over. Eventually, the silence just became permanent. We stopped reaching out... and that was it.

Life keeps moving forward. I’m happy. Though, I am fully aware that I probably won't ever cross paths with someone who fit me quite as perfectly as the last one did. In this new chapter, I've discovered different sides of myself; we’re building a different kind of love, a different way of relating to one another. It's hard to explain to anyone else, but there's just this deep understanding between us... and at the end of the day, it's all just love...🙂

What exactly do you mean by "different kind of love"? 😍
...me, I'm just sitting here waiting for someone to finally shut you up... with kisses. 😍

Edward Rivera98 said:It’s like I wrote the whole thing myself...

I’ve been the target of that kind of obsession before (and honestly, I still am), but I’ve also found myself right in the middle of that exact same mess...

Feelings like that are never just a one-way street, because if it’s actually going somewhere, both sides have to be fueling the fire... In our case, it just wasn't meant to work out, so I accepted that pretty damn fast, but it lingered for a bit before eventually morphing into this sweet friendship that we still have today. I've had other guys, obviously, but with him, I was looking for that specific spark—that certain something everyone is always hunting for in a partner—and he really had it all... the whole package... 😁
Well, whatever, it is what it is...

I don't think there's anything wrong with being a bit of an idealist—honestly, it’s pretty nice to just drift through the clouds when you're actually in a relationship that works... but once that turns into a full-blown fixation, or even crosses the line into something pathological, then we've got a problem. It's not just about the potential for things to end badly, though that's definitely a factor, it's more about the fact that losing touch with reality entirely is never a winning move...

Look, it doesn't even have to be about fixations or idealizing stuff. Maybe it's just about accepting things for what they are. If you can actually do that, everything gets way easier. On the flip side... life just throws stuff at you. It's rarely a straight line from A to B (well, maybe it is deep down, who knows). We honestly have no clue how this whole story is gonna play out...

@cosmictinker21, you're spot on. At the end of the day, you just gotta be glad you're still breathing. 😁

And that whole "poor woman" thing? I'm picturing her as some total knockout. 😍 Then again, we don't actually know what goes on behind closed doors with cosmictinker21... and even if we did, who are we to judge? Right? I mean... seriously... 😉

Sean Cruz said:I won't get into the weeds here; it's nobody's business to pry into someone else's private life. 🙂 The bottom line is that there is simply no future for them as a couple. She loves him deeply—he’s her one true, fatal love—but as for him... I can't say for sure. He certainly cares for her, but the nature of that affection is a different story. I think he’s much more grounded than she is, and he views their "friendship" through a far more pragmatic lens.

Level-headed my ass!? If he were actually level-headed, he wouldn't have let that woman slip through his fingers. 🤣

Come on, spill the rest... I think she's pretty cute. 😍

lonegardener said:There was this kid in my neighborhood who was a dead ringer for The Terminator. He even rocked the exact same hairstyle, and his whole vibe was spot on. 😍

I think we’re probably looking at over 30 LOLs by now.

Ugh, that hair... such a crime... 😍 You can rock that look until you're like twenty-five—actually, let's say twenty-seven—but after that, you gotta get a real haircut. 🙂 And Keanu... (honestly, I had such a thing for those long-haired guys back in the day) I was totally obsessed... with him in this video... And then, boom... Keanumania started. 😍

Sean Cruz said:They aren't dating, and there isn't even a remote chance they ever will be.

Yeah, I figured that out. But something still feels... off? Or maybe I just totally missed your point. Whatever, no biggie! 😉

Sean Cruz said:I honestly don't even know how to put this—she told me she was just bored with it. 😁

Are you serious? No way...

Oh, please... you’re such an idealist with that relentless positivity. As for me? I’m just an optimist of a different breed: 😁

Pessimist: It can’t get any worse than this.

Optimist: It can happen, it really can...

...so now he's being possessive?

Yeah, sure... you're such an optimist and a total idealist...

Look, I just exaggerate because it's easier to get my point across that way. 🤣

...but hey, I really do think two people can actually click and bring out the best in each other—you know, actually love each other. It's pretty simple. 😬 😉

And here I am, just a pure optimist: 😁The Pessimist: It can't get any worse.
The Optimist: Oh yeah, it totally can...

Ugh, man... aaaaaaaa......😱 😉

wearyorca94 said:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tOmdDEVyg1E

She's a total cutie... 😍

So, I was just sitting there thinking about Leonardo DiCaprio... man, that guy really knows how to pick a role, doesn't he? He’s basically the king of playing guys who are either deeply troubled or just incredibly intense. It’s like his whole brand at this point. One minute he's chasing after some lost dream in a period piece, and the next he's staring intensely into the middle distance while everything around him goes to hell. Honestly, watching him is like watching a masterclass in "I have a lot of feelings but I'm going to express them through a single, heavy stare." Sometimes I wonder if he ever just gets to go to a regular grocery store without looking like he's about to solve a murder mystery or win an Oscar for it... anyway, just a random thought. He's good, though. Really good. 🙂

...and I still remember that little kid from... The Terminator... Or maybe even Sly's son... I think he popped up in one of the Rocky Balboa movies once... 😍Man... all those teenage crushes... and I basically had the entire script of Back to the Future memorized just because of Michael J. Fox. Seriously. Marty McFly was everything... 😍 Man, I was actually tearing up... just total heartbreak... and on top of that, he was played by Kevin Costner... I even shot him a message myself... and get this—he actually wrote back. Eheheeee.... 🙂
I just knew she’d be the absolute best girl in the world... if I’d only had the chance. 😍 🤣

velvetbear11 said:Maybe you've got a point there.

But honestly, man, I was reading this thing the other day about how artists work... you know, those cases where some guy catches a glimpse of a total stranger walking down a street in NYC, falls head over heels, gets hit by this wild, funky inspiration, and suddenly churns out a masterpiece that ends up moving people and healing souls globally for the next three centuries. Just imagine that kind of madness.

Personally? I'd much rather deal with an artist who’s got a few screws loose than one who's perfectly composed, polished, and completely devoid of soul. A straight-up Nazi.

*Added that rhyme just to keep things edgy.

Or maybe he’s just perfectly polished. 😉

northernbadger12 said:Look, I only started this thread because back when I was fifteen, I went through something almost identical, and it dragged on for nearly a decade...

I fell for him the second I saw him—total god status in my eyes. We were never officially "together," but we’d hang out, and there was always this weird, unspoken connection. Even when I was in long-term relationships with other guys, he was always there, and we just *got* each other 😍 but nothing ever actually happened. It wasn't until I hit 24 that I realized I had to go for it, otherwise I'd spend the rest of my life miserable, dating random people while constantly thinking about him... but once we finally started seeing each other more regularly, I realized my feelings were totally fading. Turns out, I actually preferred the fairy tale version from before... the illusion made me way happier 🤷

Up until then, it was this "funky kind of love," but after that? I felt... I don't know, cured, I guess... 😍😍😍

Interesting.

People would lose their minds if those feelings stayed at a constant level forever. You wouldn't even perceive them the same way anymore. And you definitely wouldn't feel sane. But didn't you jump the gun a little? Like, you dove straight into an "illusion of reality." 😬

Sean Cruz said:Given the situation I described, it isn't quite that black and white. These people were together, they hadn't seen each other in years, and their next encounter hit like a boomerang—except a relationship just wasn't possible anymore. They still see each other occasionally, even to this day. There’s nothing romantic happening between them now, but the affection is still there. I don't know how deep those feelings run on his end, but they exist. So, what you're talking about is a completely different animal. We all grew up with these "ideals" we daydreamed about, completely forgetting that real life works differently. But then again, who am I to judge...

What do you even mean by "there's nothing left between them"?

Sean Cruz said:I can actually see where this is coming from. I have someone close to me who has been in love with the same person for years now. Even though the odds of them ever being together are slim to none, that feeling hasn't faded. They had a chance at something real years ago, but life happened and they drifted apart. It'll probably stay that way, but they still see each other occasionally, and I know firsthand that what one side feels is genuine love. In fact, this person is the only reason I haven't completely dismissed the notion that "unconditional" love doesn't exist.

What would love even look like to you if you weren't idealizing your partner?

Sometimes, reading your posts makes me want to sink into a deep depression. 😬 Fortunately, it's a gorgeous sunny day today, so I won't. 🤣

Ugh, sounds brutal. Love isn't some easy ride. People say it makes you feel alive, sure, but it also demands constant work. And honestly? Sometimes you just want to take a break. 😬 Like, seriously, sometimes you just want to turn your brain off and go for a walk. But then people talk about that "high" where you feel light as a feather.

Sometimes reading your stuff makes me want to spiral into a deep depression. 😬 But hey, it’s a gorgeous sunny day out, so I think I'll pass. 🤣

Seriously? No way...

Hannah White2 said:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eh1Em...eature=related
Ugh... 😍 honestly, I feel like walking straight into a wall right about now.

And you too... I mean, I guess we'll eventually find some decent photo. 🙂 Besides, you really gotta know what exactly you're falling for. 😍 We aren't talking about some "fantasy princess" types or those stuck-up socialites who give you a literal heart attack. 😉 Oops, there I go again... getting all dark. A heart attack is reserved for the lucky ones. 😍

electricraven11 said:I was totally crushing on the same guy back when we were still stuck wearing those mandatory school slippers through most of high school. We actually made out halfway through the year. It wasn't some weird obsession or anything, he was just easily the most interesting person around.

A-ha! 😍

Hannah White2 said:Ugh... here we go, another starry-eyed dreamer...
Just picture this: some guy finally hits his jackpot, starts living the dream with the woman he worships, but then—after three years when that initial hormone rush inevitably dies down—he spends the next few years convincing himself he’s been wronged. He ends up posting on some infidelity forum because he decided she "isn't the same person" he met back in the day.
The kicker? She was never that person to begin with.
But hey, that's "love" for ya.😍

Yeah... but those aren't the *real* dreamers. Real dreamers don't wake up, because they're dreaming while they're wide awake. 😉 And there's the irony in that, too. 🙂

Get this... the ones who are awake. 😍 Uh... yeah... wow...

velvetbear11 said:...besides, wasn't it love itself that drove every knight toward his greatest feats?

"Love strips away all masks. Those who fear taking off their own masks are the ones who flee from love," as Jung says. And damn, he’s right!

Long live, long live, long live love!!!

Hahaha!

I don't know, I think I'm getting swept up in something here—maybe a sudden bout of romantic fever is hitting me again. Is it a full moon or something? I feel like I'm turning back into some funky, old-school knight! Argh!

👍

Oh, yeah... we've got knights... but we've also got kingdoms. Places where princes and princesses rule the show 😍

...and even the knights knew how to become royalty eventually. 😉

Cheers to that! 🙂

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m7Rqyp-LDCo&feature=fvw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8ODD...eature=related

Here's something for your late-night scrolling... 🙂

So what have you guys actually done to love... why would it be some fixed obsession? Maybe that guy just loves her way more than he ever managed to say out loud.

What kind of "love" are we even talking about if you aren't idealizing your partner? Is it better to just spend your time insulting them? Or maybe just viewing them as some totally mediocre person? (unless they actually *are* mediocre 😬). What are you even falling for here? Do you even know? What’s the draw for you?

...like when, after twenty years, he looks at her and says, "hey gorgeous," and he actually means it. Does it even matter if it's "idealization" or whatever in that moment? It fills him up; it makes him feel light, happy, alive. And hey, maybe she really is "objectively" stunning. 🙂

Maybe the person in the original post is hurting for a completely different reason... and trust me, there are plenty of those. Maybe he just needs a specific part of her—something that actually moves him...

Love lives in poetry, it shows up in a touch, it's caught in a glance... man... it hurts... when you can't feel it somehow. Nobody complains about the quantity... because you can't measure it. 😉

Ah... love, man... that love... 😍

Man, looking back on it now... it’s not even stupidity. It's just total aimlessness. Pure laziness. I mean, you can actually put some brainpower into things if you try...