Timothy Morgan38 said:So, here’s the thing... I’m trying to wrap my head around what stress actually *is*. How do you tell if your stress levels are spiking, and more importantly, if you’re actually handling it effectively?...
The reason I’m asking is that I keep seeing doctors chalk everything up to "stress." In way too many cases, they just stop there and don't bother with further testing...
Given that I've been hit with one thing after another over the last two years, I have no doubt I'm under massive amounts of pressure, but at the same time, I feel like I'm holding up pretty well...
How do you actually spot it? Does "poor coping" mean someone is slowly unraveling, or can you be under fire without showing any obvious signs of being on edge?...
Because my situation is a bit of a mess...
Last year was just a constant stream of inflammations, issues with blood in my urine (prostate inflammation), and having gum surgery performed across all four quadrants of my mouth... This year has been even worse. My mom was diagnosed with lung cancer, and my wife had some gynecological "mysteries" that—thankfully—turned out to be nothing serious... On top of that, we've been dealing with a financial crisis and a string of other stupid setbacks that only made things harder... I haven't had a decent vacation in three years, and this year, I didn't get a single day off...
Yet, despite all that, I’m not falling apart. Most of the time, I’m calm, I handle problems well, and I don't panic...
Recently, I had some pretty serious health issues, and my doctor's first question was whether I was under stress... and if these symptoms could be caused by stress...
My response was simple: "nothing out of the ordinary"
Her comeback? "you are one of the rare ones"
So, now I'm wondering... how do you know if stress is actually messing with your daily life and your physical health?
Like I said, I think I'm doing fine (in my own opinion). I don't bottle things up; I talk about my problems immediately and deal with them right away instead of waiting for them to "cool off," and generally speaking, I feel mentally solid, despite all the nonsense and misfortune we've faced...
Is my good mental state a sign that I'm managing well, or are there non-psychological indicators that stress is present and slowly taking "control" of my body?
I hope I'm not overcomplicating this, but it really threw me when my doctor suggested she didn't believe I wasn't stressed. She told me that the signs of stress aren't just "shaky hands" or "wild eyes with a manic stare"—she meant you don't need visible symptoms for the stress to be actively impacting your overall physical condition...
The doctor is likely right. If I had to explain stress, I’d use the analogy of a single hair causing a camel's back to snap. People use camels to haul heavy loads, and those animals have a specific carrying capacity. You wouldn't pile the maximum weight on a young camel immediately; you increase the load gradually. Regardless, if you push too hard, the camel's back breaks.
Humans have a built-in tolerance for stress. Back in the day, that usually meant worrying about finding a decent spot to sleep in a cave, looking out for the tribe, or tracking down enough food.
Nowadays, we’ve basically piled everything onto our own necks—our housing, our commutes, our careers, plus increasingly distant and complicated social webs, along with all the ambitions and anxieties that come with them.
Stress is just a part of life, and most people manage it reasonably well. Like the doctor said, shaky hands or, say, aggressive outbursts aren't the only indicators. A weakened immune system is often the most common fallout. Think about it: maybe you've caught more minor bugs over the last three years, or maybe you find yourself feeling a bit more drained at the end of the day than you did three years ago. That’s stress. Shaking hands, irritability, or panic attacks generally happen to those who have a harder time processing it.
I think I lost my original train of thought in this long-winded rant, but the bottom line is this: go take a vacation. 🙂