Posts by lonegardener

Jerry Martinez5 said:Here’s the topic. Basically, there are two threads here:
What happens when someone without depression takes an antidepressant? Specifically Deprozel—never heard of that one, I guess.
Can you fake depression and anxiety? I guess maybe. It seems possible, though I doubt anyone would bother with all that drama unless they had a reason to.

Ugh, such a stickler for rules... 🤣

Doesn't taking antidepressants when you aren't depressed strike you as a bit 'Brave New World'? You can't really call me out just because my associations are a little darker than yours. 😍

Anyway, I won't drone on... 😬

Hannah Davis18 said:There’s nothing mystical about feelings.😉
I still feel like a human being, not some damn robot.

Anyway, I'll stop. Don't want to start an argument with Jerry Martinez5. 😘

edit; sure, you could fake it. Why not... but there's also that thing where a doctor helps out by writing down a "slightly different" diagnosis just so your medical records don't look a certain way. 😉

You said it! 👍

But that’s exactly my point—I’m not entirely sure how your version of "feeling human" actually differs from being a robot. To me, they sound suspiciously similar. 🤷

Hannah Davis18 said:I never said anything about feeling miserable. Emotions are what make us human, I guess. Besides, I already mentioned that cocaine and booze are pretty good mood lifters. For certain things. 😳

When you say emotions, are we talking about something supernatural, or just basic brain activity?

If it's the latter, I don't see why we couldn't just engineer a pill to trigger whatever specific emotion you're looking for. 🤷 😬

Hannah Davis18 said:God damn it, man. 😬
So just say right away that being a donkey is what gets you going.
Why couldn't Hannah Davis18 just be donkey-like? After a while, you realize having periods of sadness, joy, peace... it's the ups and downs that actually make us feel alive.
Besides, there's plenty of things in real life similar to being a donkey, so it's not exactly bliss when you get hooked: :diego maradona:.

So, what you're saying is that once you feel great, you get bored after a few days (or months? years?) and suddenly crave feeling miserable just to prove you're still breathing? 😬

Unknown, I'm not... entirely convinced. 😈

Jerry Martinez5 said:And why is it that you never actually start your own threads, but instead just hijack everyone else's? ☕

In technical terms, I guess you could call it trolling. 😬

Can we please get back to the topic at hand?

I don't follow—how is this even a derailment?
😲🤷
If I had started talking about quantum mechanics, that would be a detour. To me, there seems to be a very direct link between the title and my question.

edit: Or maybe there isn't. It looks like Nemrut has something specific on their mind and just wants a practical answer. But personally, I was more interested in the general concept of chasing a "good mood" through external chemicals.

Hannah Davis18 said:Quote:>

lonegardener says: I'm not even talking about the pills we have now. I mean like, hypothetical future super-pills. Stuff that makes you feel amazing all the time, no matter what's going on around you. So, there wouldn't be any reason to actually do anything—because if you're only acting just to chase that happy feeling, why bother if you *already* feel happy without having to lift a finger? 😬 (basically, the only thing left to do is swallow the pill. 😈)

Yeah, you're totally tripping. 😁 Huxley described this pretty well 🙂 and it's called Soma. 😉.
anyway, I don't see any motivation that would make me pop a pill just to sit around and do nothing.😲

Is it stuck? 😍 Does "lonegardener" sound like a female name to you? 😬

Exactly. That’s my point—I'm aiming at something much bigger than just a scapegoat. Even the citizens living in a Brave New World still find ways to stay busy... but why? There isn't even a reason to do it. 🤷

In short, could you explain to me *why* that option is such a dealbreaker for you? Is it because you don't want to be stuck feeling constant, uninterrupted happiness? 😬

Hannah Davis18 said:Look, a pill isn't going to fix any of your problems. It might dull some symptoms, maybe.

It basically just "lifts" people enough so they can actually get moving.👍 If you're feeling okay, everything's easier.🙂

I’m not talking about the pills you see on the shelves today.

Let’s talk about those hypothetical "super-tablets" from the future—the kind that could supposedly keep you feeling amazing no matter what life throws your way.

Think about it this way: there won't be any need to take action. If you're only acting because you want to chase that feeling of happiness or satisfaction, then why bother? If you already feel happy and fulfilled right now—without doing a single thing—then the drive to act just disappears. 😬

The only thing you’ll actually have to do is swallow a pill. 😈)

Jerry Martinez5 said:Personally, I'll pass. 👍

I want to fix my life. I want to actually feel good because of my own damn effort.

But why exactly? 😍

Let’s play a little thought experiment. Imagine there were these pills—they don't exist yet, obviously—that you could take regularly with zero side effects. They would simply make you feel happy and content, regardless of your circumstances.

Would you take them? And if not, what's the reason?

James Ramirez10 said:Fair enough, but we established over a thousand posts ago that you're relatively sane and have a pretty standard life setup.

Hmm, well now... 😬 the real question is what "normal" even means.

That’s strange, isn't it?

I honestly feel like I underestimate them way more often than they ever do me.😬

swiftotter95 said:I was just sitting here thinking about what lonegardener mentioned earlier... it really does make you wonder how much we overlook in our daily routines, doesn't it? It's like that feeling you get when you're driving down a quiet stretch of highway in the Midwest, just watching the landscape shift, and suddenly you realize how much noise we usually carry around with us... anyway, I suppose my point is that there's a certain weight to these observations that most people just breeze right past without a second thought...
Well, I find myself in the exact same boat... 😍 But Ali—does it never weigh on you, even just a little bit, that what you’re chasing might simply be an illusion... that maybe this ideal version of things doesn't actually exist in the real world? I can't help but wonder if it’s just a beautiful dream we tell ourselves, one that we eventually have to let go of, sooner or later... 🤷

I can't help but feel that all this nihilism and cynicism you’ve been leaning into is really just a bit of a mask... though I suppose we all have our ways of shielding ourselves from the world, don't we?
You wouldn't happen to be here, would you... if you were truly, absolutely, one hundred percent certain about that...

Not at all. I never claimed to be 100% certain... that’s why I phrased it as "does this question haunt you?" If I actually had a definitive answer, the question itself wouldn't bother me—it would be the answer that did. And if I were truly settled on an answer, I definitely wouldn't feel the need to write it out loud...

swiftotter95 said:I appreciate the interest from Jerry Martinez5, we happen to be the same gender.
And yes, my self-confidence is definitely lacking.
It’s mostly when I’m out in social settings... there’s this nagging sensation that I’m being judged by everyone around me, a feeling I just can't seem to shake while it's happening, though I can process it better later on...
As for love, well, when it comes to love, I feel like a child who just wants to cling desperately to the one they care about. Instead of being guided by a healthy, balanced affection, that desperate need to hold on too tight comes out of me like some sort of vampire... And it always ends up the same way, I become overly serious, paralyzed by fear, and the outcome is all too predictable...

Yeah, I figured you were a guy too. 😬

swiftotter95 said:When I truly lock in and give it my absolute all, the results I see are honestly way above average...
The problem is, I tend to drift, just sort of lingering in this sort of aimless limbo where I lose all my drive...

Hmm, that sounds strangely familiar...

swiftotter95 said:I definitely recognize that feeling of hibernation. But for me, it isn't about a lack of meaning. It’s more of a deep, aching hunger for love—the sheer joy of it. Connecting with art and beauty provides me with this sense of radiance and transcendence that fills me up in certain moments... though connecting with people is a much harder road to travel.

I'm right there with you on that one. 😍 Ali, does it ever cross your mind that what you’re looking for might just not exist? Maybe it’s nothing more than an illusion you eventually have to let go of, sooner or later. 🤷

Jerry Martinez5 said:Great. 👍👍

Look, it works. That’s vital. Here’s another practical tip: set smaller goals. Or better yet, just break your main goal down into bite-sized pieces. For instance, if you're aiming to graduate from medical school, that can feel like an impossibly distant, overwhelming mountain to climb—let's face it, med school is brutal. But if you instead celebrate passing the entrance exams, or find some small win in every single exam you clear... it changes things. Usually, we just end up killing ourselves with goals that are set way too high, which leads to total despair because we assume we're incapable before we even start. 😢

I find myself bragging every single time I actually tidy up my apartment. Or when I finally settle the utility bills. Even if I force myself to grab coffee with someone when I’d much rather just stay curled up on the couch at home. 😉

How do you feel about that approach—shorter goals and giving yourself a pat on the back?

Whew, you certainly seem upbeat... 😍

swiftotter95 said:How can I start helping myself? Deep down, there’s this heavy sense of despair and listlessness that I feel like I’ve been tripping over my own feet over for my entire life... Every single time I face a new experience, holding onto this tiny flicker of hope that I might finally encounter something truly authentic, something liberating and joyful, I just seem to stumble at the very first hurdle, as if this profound state of being is woven into the very fabric of who I am.
Has anyone else here, dealing with a similar internal struggle, actually managed to find their way out of this darkness???

Well... not yet. 😬

Maybe I never will, who knows. You sort of just adapt and keep moving, though maybe at a significantly reduced capacity... kind of like a bear going into hibernation. For me, it’s tied to this profound sense of existential emptiness—something I felt even back when I was just a kid. I wouldn't even call it a byproduct of how I live my life; it feels more "deeply rooted" than that. Maybe it's a lack of faith or something else entirely. I've spent time observing how other atheists live, trying to grasp what "purpose" actually means to them, but I haven't cracked the code. To me, both believers and atheists remain an enigma.

Chris Cooper5 said:Why isn't anyone replying to this thread anymore? I don't know... is it just me? Am I being avoided? It feels like I can't ever seem to actually connect with people, you know? I keep wondering if the issue is actually me, or if maybe it's everyone else. But honestly, it's probably not that simple. This is... I guess you could call it a pretty serious problem.

Well, let's start by addressing what you said above. What exactly is your motivation for wanting to "socialize"? You mentioned earlier that people really get on your nerves and that you aren't actually interested in hanging out with them. Are you trying to say that one casual hookup isn't enough and you need a whole crowd instead? Or maybe you were just exaggerating because you're actually lonely and don't have anyone at all. Apple... if that's the case, I don't really feel qualified to give you life coaching on that. My only suggestion would be to find a hobby that involves being around other people indirectly. 🤷

In short—find an interest, something you actually care about. But find it because it genuinely interests you, not just as a way to "socialize." If your only goal is meeting people, then the activity itself isn't the point, right? It becomes just a tool rather than the purpose. So, maybe start by figuring out if there is anything you actually enjoy doing. That might be the first step. Though even that isn't easy, since so many people sadly find themselves with absolutely nothing that sparks their interest. 🤷

Chris Cooper5 said:man, you just don't get it at all☕

It's possible... 😬 - but are you really sure about that? 😍

Chris Cooper5 said:Look, I have one damn friend and frankly, it isn't enough. I don't really feel like hanging out with people because, I don't know, most of them just gross me out.

😬 You say you don't want to socialize—so where is the actual issue with socialization then? Why even worry about it if you have no desire to be around people? It doesn't quite add up. 😉

Chris Cooper5 said:I mean, look at me, I never even leave my apartment—especially not out at night—so I have no clue where someone would even meet a friend. It would probably just be the mailman, or the guy from Comcast coming to fix the cable, the cleaning lady, or the cashier at the grocery store downstairs. There aren't exactly many options there. Then again, it's a different story if you're out and about every day, being part of the world. Even if you are social and always down to hang out.

I don't know, I deal with enough mental health stuff that life itself feels more boring than anything else, I guess. And, well, maybe you can live without friends if you're a peaceful person and you're okay with what you've got. But then again, humans are social creatures, and they say you're only worth as much as your circle of friends. Sometimes I'd love to just grab a coffee with someone, talk about interesting things, hang out, and share the highs and lows. When I don't have anyone, I just have to find other ways to stay busy. It would all be fine if I were healthy. But like this... it's not great whether I'm alone or out in a crowd.

I’m not so sure it’s ever that simple, even when you have plenty of "opportunities" at your fingertips. Take my situation, for instance—I have a massive network of professional contacts. In fact, I run in circles where I could easily steer things toward something more personal than just business if I actually wanted to. Between current colleagues, former coworkers, and various industry connections, the options are there. But even with all that, I still think finding a true friend is nothing more than a total lottery. 🤷 It often starts back in childhood or during those high school years... and more often than not, it just gets darker as you go, much like it did in my case.
Honestly, it would probably be for the best if you found a hobby or something to keep you busy outside of this forum...

Chris Cooper5 said:I mean, look at me, I never even leave my apartment—especially not out at night—so I have no clue where someone would even meet a friend. It would probably just be the mailman, or the guy from Comcast coming to fix the cable, the cleaning lady, or the cashier at the grocery store downstairs. There aren't exactly many options there. Then again, it's a different story if you're out and about every day, being part of the world. Even if you are social and always down to hang out.

I don't know, I deal with enough mental health stuff that life itself feels more boring than anything else, I guess. And, well, maybe you can live without friends if you're a peaceful person and you're okay with what you've got. But then again, humans are social creatures, and they say you're only worth as much as your circle of friends. Sometimes I'd love to just grab a coffee with someone, talk about interesting things, hang out, and share the highs and lows. When I don't have anyone, I just have to find other ways to stay busy. It would all be fine if I were healthy. But like this... it's not great whether I'm alone or out in a crowd.

Pure nonsense (this last part). People who judge their worth by their friend count usually have what I’d call "strictly professional" relationships. I know folks out there with 450 'friends' on Facebook. You really have to wonder—what kind of 'friends' are those, actually? 😁

Just to be clear—I’m not trying to gatekeep how anyone chooses to define a "friend." If you have a specific definition in mind that works for you, then sure, maybe it really is possible to claim 450 friends. 🤷

Chris Cooper5 said:It doesn't always boil down to luck, I guess. Honestly, a lot of it comes down to who you actually are as a person. Looking back at my old school days, I noticed so many people were always surrounded by these huge groups of friends, mostly just because they were social butterflies or whatever. I wasn't really that type—I never really hung out with anyone outside of class. And those massive friend groups? Most of them don't even speak to each other anymore. For me, if I decide someone is a friend, I’m that kind of person for life. It's just... well, I don't really have many friends to apply that to right now. I have a few left over from high school, but we never actually see each other. They're good people, and they've helped me out plenty of times—I really do care about them—but they aren't exactly what I picture when I think of a "best friend." There are just so many different factors involved in all of this, I suppose.

Boredom is usually defined as this lack of purpose or meaning, I guess. Or maybe that's just it. For me, honestly... I don't know, everything feels pretty tedious all the time. It’s probably just hit this weird, unhealthy phase in my life. Not that there’s much sense to anything anyway, if I'm being real. Some people can spend their whole lives alone and never feel bored, but for others—people like me—everything just feels flat. Even hanging out with people gets old fast. So, I don't really get why I'm even typing this out, saying I need friends or whatever.🙄

Like I said, it’s a total lottery. You either get lucky or you don't. I highly doubt you can manufacture a friendship through some calculated strategy or forced effort. If you do, it isn't a friendship; it's more like a business partnership. You should check out the Tennessee Williams novella, *Suddenly Last Summer* by Stone. I think you might enjoy it... and it's a quick read, maybe around 60 pages or so.

Chris Cooper5 said:It doesn't always boil down to luck, I guess. Honestly, a lot of it comes down to who you actually are as a person. Looking back at my old school days, I noticed so many people were always surrounded by these huge groups of friends, mostly just because they were social butterflies or whatever. I wasn't really that type—I never really hung out with anyone outside of class. And those massive friend groups? Most of them don't even speak to each other anymore. For me, if I decide someone is a friend, I’m that kind of person for life. It's just... well, I don't really have many friends to apply that to right now. I have a few left over from high school, but we never actually see each other. They're good people, and they've helped me out plenty of times—I really do care about them—but they aren't exactly what I picture when I think of a "best friend." There are just so many different factors involved in all of this, I suppose.

Boredom is usually defined as this lack of purpose or meaning, I guess. Or maybe that's just it. For me, honestly... I don't know, everything feels pretty tedious all the time. It’s probably just hit this weird, unhealthy phase in my life. Not that there’s much sense to anything anyway, if I'm being real. Some people can spend their whole lives alone and never feel bored, but for others—people like me—everything just feels flat. Even hanging out with people gets old fast. So, I don't really get why I'm even typing this out, saying I need friends or whatever.🙄

Hmm. Nothing makes sense to me either, yet I never feel bored. Though, perhaps we define "boredom" differently.

Thomas Howard93 said:I wasn't speaking in general terms; I was just saying that I'm perfectly fine with myself.

😍 See? It's obvious to me that what you said above was a provocation, yet I still can't resist responding. Well, shoot.

But tell me—how exactly did you conclude that I am "perfect just the way I am"? Because if you truly perceive me that way, then you've managed to read me better in a moment than I have in all these years. In that case, I have no choice but to tip my hat to you. 🙏

Thomas Howard93 said:Alright then, why are you always so perfect yet so gloomy?🤷

😱 😲 😲
Sure, if you define "perfect" as having this obsessive-compulsive need to nitpick everyone else's logic—even when there’s zero payoff—then yeah, call me perfect. If that compulsion stems from a professional habit or some other psychological quirk, then fine. I guess I really am flawless. 🤣

Chris Cooper5 said:Maybe people aren't actually that boring. You don't really know until you actually meet them. But how do you even do that? I don't know. Every time I do meet someone, we never become friends. It almost never happens. The thing is, I just can't bring myself to do it. I don't have the energy to go out and hunt for friends or try that hard. I've got way too much other stuff going on. But then, in the end, I just get lonely.

Take my major, for example. There are about a hundred people in my program, and they all hang out in these little groups, while I'm always just... there by myself. I really don't understand why. And I guess it's pretty normal that people gossip about me since I'm always alone. To be fair, I am a bit of a loner, so maybe they're laughing at me, but the truth is I've always had a million things running through my head and I just don't have the drive to socialize. Then boredom hits, and I realize I don't actually have any friends. I don't really see how a psychologist could help with that part. I don't know.

Yeah, you're describing a really tricky situation here. It truly is, and personally, I don't have some magic recipe to "overcome" it—something that's guaranteed to work. I often get the feeling it just comes down to pure luck, or maybe just a lack of interest.

To be honest, I’d say the only real difference between us is that I never actually get bored. I can't remember a single time in my life when I felt that way. Even if I wasn't doing anything particularly important. For instance, even being here on this forum isn't boring at all; if anything, it's the opposite. I'd go as far as to say that "boredom" is a state of being that I don't really understand. 😕

Chris Cooper5 said:No, it's not that. You're telling me that *I* think you're different from everyone else, and then you explain how you aren't actually special and are just like everyone else. It's like... I never even said you were different in the first place. I'm just a totally regular person.

Have you considered the possibility that you might have misread the situation? 😉

Look, you even admitted that people constantly misinterpret you. Do you think it’s impossible that you might be doing the same—misinterpreting things yourself?

You wrote, "ignore me, just like everyone else." While it doesn't follow with mathematical certainty that you view yourself as "different," it certainly implies it. Human conversation isn't a logic puzzle where everything has to be stated with 100% precision. There are nuances, implications, and subtext at play here.

But let's move past that. So, you believe you're a completely normal person. If that's the case, what exactly is the issue? Why are you struggling with socializing when other "normal" people aren't? I assume you have some sort of initial theory on why that is.

Chris Cooper5 said:Yeah, okay, but which logical error did I actually make?

It wasn't you. 😕

You asked "why am I like this," so I gave you an answer. I assumed you were asking about the concept in general, rather than just focusing on your specific situation.

(To be fair, I haven't scrolled through your entire profile—I'm sure you've made plenty of logical slips yourself. And I certainly have my own. 😍 )