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Posts by Nicole Barrett76

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Schizophrenia - General Discussion in Psychology & Therapy ·
Carol Barrett2 said:Give it a rest, man. 😵 Age doesn't have anything to do with this—you should've known better than to go looking for your own medical fixes. 🤦 As for the rest of what you wrote, I honestly didn't catch half of it since I’m totally clueless about this stuff.

I went through something similar where my liver was acting up, but somehow it managed to bounce back. Maybe that’s why I’m dealing with vision issues and other random health headaches now, just like you. Could be some lingering fallout from all that.

I guess I just got lucky that things cleared up eventually.

I also consider myself a novice in these matters.

My vision problems stem from being born prematurely at seven months. That alone compromised my sight. I spent two months in a neonatal intensive care unit, and given the medical technology available back then, infants were required to keep their eyes open for twenty-four hours a day, which only exacerbated the damage to my vision.

If my liver function is indeed impaired—which suggests so based on a diagnostic test I found in a book regarding traditional Chinese herbal medicine—improving my liver wouldn't fix my eyesight due to those early complications. However, if I could just regain some energy, stop this constant ringing in my ears, and finally move away from relying on benzodiazepines, would I not be absolutely overjoyed?
Schizophrenia - General Discussion in Psychology & Therapy ·
Carol Barrett2 said:Honestly, over where @Rebecca Rivera3 hangs out, any kind of medical cannabis is ridiculously overpriced—mostly because it’s still technically illegal here. Since it's off the books, people end up paying a massive premium just to get their hands on it compared to what you guys deal with. They're only just now having the big debates about whether to actually legalize it for medical use.

Actually, it isn't even that much cheaper in the States. @Rebecca Rivera3, I think I'll head over to Google and search for "CBD resin" to see what the deal is.
Schizophrenia - General Discussion in Psychology & Therapy ·
Carol Barrett2 said:They’re giving you way too much Apaurin. Way more than they give me. I used to be on 15mg a day, maybe even more, but my psychiatrist at the CDC helped me scale it back.

And yeah, I know that whole forgetting thing. It sucks. Total side effect.

I think I know what I need to slow me down, though—it's because of these songs and voices in my head. These songs loop in my brain for a long time, and sometimes those voices just pop in out of nowhere. But you're right, I should try to manage without the meds. Maybe I'll just get used to it.

You're right about the rest of it, too. Now that I'm sleeping this much, I'm actually being a bit more useful. But it's minimal. I do the dishes, which helps me stay calm, but that's about it. Like I said, I'm mostly living in my own little world lately.

Unfortunately, my sleep was messed up again last night. Hopefully, it doesn't get totally ruined. I was wide awake most of the night and didn't crawl out of bed until noon. Slept for almost 12 hours again.

Has anyone actually figured out what this ringing is? Is it tinnitus, or blood pressure, or something else entirely? If it's a side effect of the medication, I don't get why they aren't switching it up for you.

If I remember correctly, you have thyroid issues too, right? Could it be coming from that?

Supposedly, the thyroid isn't the root cause because my hormone levels are balanced like a Swiss watch thanks to Letrox. According to Chinese Medicine, the thyroid isn't the main culprit; rather, the liver is malfunctioning, and the thyroid is simply a victim caught in a domino effect triggered by poor liver function.

After reading on Wikipedia about how much thyroid hormone is processed in the liver and just how complicated those biochemical conversions are, it really seems like those ancient herbalists and medical practitioners were onto something.

Even Ayurvedic medicine, which I am currently experimenting with, indirectly blames poor liver function for thyroid issues, though they operate under an entirely different system. I'm trying it out because I'm not particularly fond of the way Chinese Medicine utilizes fungi; according to Ayurveda, consuming mushrooms leads to even greater ignorance, inertia, and lack of knowledge than eating meat does.

The issue with Ayurvedic medicine is their use of certain natural minerals—uric acid, if I'm not mistaken—but I personally believe there is no need for us to ingest trace elements through artificial means. We don't need calcium, potassium, or magnesium in pill form when the entire landscape is built from them! If we are to take trace elements, they should be bonded with an amino acid, citric acid, or some other organic compound.

I have no idea why my ears are ringing; I suspect it's the benzos, as I mentioned before. When I went to see a neurologist and an audiologist over a decade ago (I'm 45 now) regarding this exact problem, he told me: "Sir, you're too old for this." For heaven's sake, I was only in my early thirties!

So, what now? Should I just start walking slowly toward the cemetery, perhaps drop dead somewhere along the way, just so they don't have to transport my corpse from my house to the graveyard?

I am speechless; I truly have no words left.
Schizophrenia - General Discussion in Psychology & Therapy ·
Carol Barrett2 said:I was just doing some digging on Google earlier, and apparently, that stuff they prescribed you is actually pretty heavy-duty. I know exactly what you’re talking about—you mentioned this before, actually. My brain just slipped on it for a second. Honestly, though? It doesn't feel right to handle things that way. They move so fast sometimes, it ends up feeling a bit sloppy, if you know what I mean.

How are you holding up, @Piskavac? As for me... I'm alright. Things were better before, I guess. But I've got this lingering anxiety now—just a fear that things might take a turn for the worse. I've been getting these little... I don't even know how to put it... these repetitive songs stuck in my head daily. It’s not constant, but then there are these voices, like little flashbacks of my own. Maybe it's because I haven't been sleeping much lately? Either way, things are mostly better, fingers crossed.

I'm honestly a little worried I might need something to take in the afternoon, just to take the edge off. I seem to be way more hyperactive than usual lately. But hey, I'll probably adjust. The brain is plastic, right? I'll get used to the new normal eventually.

Thank you for looking up information regarding Tegretol. If I have been tiresome by constantly writing about my diagnosis, please forgive me. My head is ringing incessantly, and I suspect it is due to the benzodiazepines; I truly wish I could wean myself off them, but I simply cannot find a way to quit. My memory is failing me because of them. I struggle to remember what I did yesterday, whereas my memories from years ago remain vivid. Before bed, I take 10mg of Apaurin, which is quite a high dose, though sometimes I opt for Sanval instead of Apaurin.

While I was taking Ashwagandha, I shouldn't have been using benzos, but I used them for a short period because money was tight, and the ringing in my ears didn't subside. I suppose one would need to take it continuously for about a year to see results. However, I feel I need other herbal supplements as well. Aside from researching them, the only true way to determine which herbs might help is to trial the ones you believe could be beneficial. Even when I have the funds to buy a specific supplement, I often find myself choosing something else instead.

Carol Barrett2 said:I was just doing some digging on Google earlier, and apparently, that stuff they prescribed you is actually pretty heavy-duty. I know exactly what you’re talking about—you mentioned this before, actually. My brain just slipped on it for a second. Honestly, though? It doesn't feel right to handle things that way. They move so fast sometimes, it ends up feeling a bit sloppy, if you know what I mean.

How are you holding up, @Piskavac? As for me... I'm alright. Things were better before, I guess. But I've got this lingering anxiety now—just a fear that things might take a turn for the worse. I've been getting these little... I don't even know how to put it... these repetitive songs stuck in my head daily. It’s not constant, but then there are these voices, like little flashbacks of my own. Maybe it's because I haven't been sleeping much lately? Either way, things are mostly better, fingers crossed.

I'm honestly a little worried I might need something to take in the afternoon, just to take the edge off. I seem to be way more hyperactive than usual lately. But hey, I'll probably adjust. The brain is plastic, right? I'll get used to the new normal eventually.

I am not quite sure why you feel the need for something to slow you down in the afternoon if you spend most of your day sleeping. When you are in that heightened state—perhaps due to the agitation or the rapid speech—couldn't you use that energy to finally tackle those tasks you've been putting off for ages? Or perhaps engage in activities you actually enjoy?

Even if you accomplish nothing else, "simply" sweeping the house or washing the dishes would be a tremendous help to your mother, whom you mentioned is getting older.

Do you experience any other sensations when you are feeling sped up? Do you feel euphoric, or perhaps "excessively" cheerful? Are there any other symptoms besides the ones you feel when you are lethargic or sleeping?
Schizophrenia - General Discussion in Psychology & Therapy ·
Economic freedom is the foundation upon which all other liberties are built. If we work ourselves to death only to face problems that feel akin to schizophrenia, yet we visit a psychiatrist once a week paying $250-$167per session, isn't it absurd how easily a doctor might just slap a diagnosis of schizophrenia on you?

Admittedly, even the practitioner might exaggerate our struggles simply to ensure we return more frequently, securing their own steady income. That is the inherent downside when dealing with any private physician.

By my third session, a psychiatrist in Washington, D.C. actually labeled me mentally deficient in her notes, yet she never had the decency to tell me the diagnosis to my face; instead, those three times, she merely wrote my name in the files. Once she realized during the fourth session that I was far from being deficient, and when I questioned her about her notes, she began addressing the records with "Sir" followed by my full name.

In the USA, or perhaps in other developed nations in Europe, such conduct would likely earn her a formal reprimand or even force her to offer an apology without me having to demand one.

Fortunately, she recognized her error quickly. Honestly, I am not even concerned with the diagnosis itself; diagnoses come and go. What truly matters is that she didn't confront me directly, leaving me to grapple with that label and the shock of seeing it written down while standing at a crowded bus station, surrounded by commuters, making my way through the city to a general practitioner who prescribed Tegretol because that was what the psychiatrist had ordered; he looked at me and asked, "So, Nicole Barrett76, why are you doing this to yourself?"
Schizophrenia - General Discussion in Psychology & Therapy ·
I paid a visit to my friend who struggles with schizophrenia today. He seems to be doing even worse than he was about ten days ago when he came to see me. I didn't actually get a chance to speak with him at all, finding myself instead only able to converse with his mother. I had truly hoped that if we could just find a moment to talk privately, I might be able to persuade him to quit smoking and save himself a small fortune; wouldn't it be wonderful if he could just move past this intense paranoia that someone might secretly lace his tobacco with poison?

How can he not realize that anyone capable of such a thing could just as easily lace his cigarettes?
Looking for a specialist... in Health ·
wiredrider8 said:Can anyone recommend a top-tier endocrinologist? I am looking for either private practice or someone covered by Medicare, traveling between Cleveland and Chicago. Thanks!

Finding the absolute best endocrinologist is nearly as difficult as trying to land an audience with the President or the Prime Minister. If you are searching for that elite tier, Dr. Milan Vrkljan over at Vinogradski would be my pick.

However, if you can find satisfaction in an excellent, reliable specialist who will truly listen to you and take the time to understand your needs, then Dr. Tanja Škorić at Mayo Clinic is the one.

Here is a little bit about my experience with her.

Even though my endocrine issues are quite complex, Dr. Vrkljan eventually referred me to another physician because his schedule was so packed, and after that, the doctors at the hospital seemed to rotate through like they were on an assembly line. Every seven or eight months when I showed up for a checkup, I would be greeted by a completely different doctor. This cycle continued for years until I finally went out of my way to ask about an endocrinologist who had decided to stay in America for good, which led me to Dr. Škorić. And look at where we are now—I have seen her three or four times in a row.

Since I have been receiving treatment at that hospital since I was a young child, saying goodbye to that institution felt perhaps even more profound than going through a divorce (assuming, of course, that I ever had a wife).

There are many things a patient can endure when seeing a doctor, but I simply cannot—and should not have to—tolerate a different physician every few months.
Schizophrenia - General Discussion in Psychology & Therapy ·
Is it not far more prudent to opt for powdered herbal supplements rather than those processed tablets? Tablets tend to carry a much higher price tag and are often cluttered with unnecessary fillers.
Looking for a specialist... in Health ·
Forgive me if I am repeating myself...

Does anyone know of a reliable psychiatrist at the local general hospital in Požega? And tell me, do they actually take the time to listen to their patients, or is a ten-minute appointment considered a luxury there?
Looking for a specialist... in Health ·
Does anyone know of a reliable psychiatrist practicing at the Požega General Hospital? Is it even possible to find a professional there who will actually listen to a patient for more than ten minutes?
Schizophrenia - General Discussion in Psychology & Therapy ·
Nicole Barrett76 said:I once had the opportunity to spend time with a "schizophrenic from the VA" who takes a massive amount of medication; he even begged for higher doses, but his psychiatrists refused because they were already pushing the absolute maximum. He was taking ten to twelve different types of psychotropic drugs two or three times a day. If there is any silver lining, it is that he has a military pension, having been diagnosed with schizophrenia in his early twenties. I suspect he had a genetic predisposition, and his service in the military was merely the "trigger" that violently set the illness in motion.

Harold Anderson3, please forgive me if I offended you with that post. I intended to add more but forgot, so I am adding it now: your posts, just like those from Jose Ward4, Carol Barrett2, and the others who stop by occasionally, sound completely coherent. I do not consider any of you to be a "schizophrenic from the VA."

That acquaintance of mine, the schizophrenic I spent time with, has ended our friendship. I find myself at a crossroads, wondering: if I attempt to push our connection a little further in hopes of mmmmmmaybe helping him even slightly, would that constitute a violation of his free will? And yet, if I refrain from reaching out, am I truly respecting his autonomy? Is his true free will to remain isolated, or is the illness itself imposing this self-isolation upon him?

He told me he smokes heavily and spends nearly $500 on cigarettes alone. When I asked why he wouldn't just switch to rolling his own tobacco—which would be about three times cheaper—he said he simply lacked the willpower. It breaks my heart to see him waste so much money on smoking, and I feel such profound sorrow that I cannot impart knowledge regarding nutritional approaches to mitigating schizophrenic symptoms, which might eventually allow him to reduce his antipsychotic intake, especially since he is near the ceiling of what is safe. Unfortunately, American psychiatrists tend to scoff at nutritional or any other holistic approaches.

Out of nowhere, that friend visited me today after several months of silence. I was genuinely moved by his visit. He appeared much better than when I last visited his home a few months ago. Regrettably, however, he is suffering from leg thrombosis and spent eight days in the internal medicine ward of the hospital because of it. Aside from the antipsychotics, I suspect his heavy smoking played a significant role. We once again touched upon the subject of smoking and why he wastes so much money on cigarettes instead of rolling his own. He told me that if he were to roll his own, he would fear that someone might pour poison into them. My mother was present during this exchange. Had she not been there, I would have asked him: "Well, couldn't they just pour poison into your cigarettes then? If you lack the will to roll them and live in fear, do you at least have someone you trust enough to roll them for you? You would save so much money that way." But I refrained from asking. My mother! She was standing so close to me in that moment that it felt as though she gave me a look, signaling us to drop the subject, so we transitioned into shallower conversation. He sounded remarkably coherent—perhaps even more coherent than he did a few months ago.
I simply wish to correct an inaccurate statement made to me by a nurse in the proctology department over a month ago.

Is it not wonderful that you don't actually have to trek over to the main white building just to get a travel authorization stamped? Instead, they handle all those verifications on the first floor of the white building that sits right against the green wing. That specific counter is located directly above the patient registration desk on the ground floor. You can have your paperwork validated there, where both the proctologist's nurse and the specialist themselves can add their necessary notes, and then you are finished! There is absolutely no need to delay your day by heading to the main white building—at least, not when dealing with proctology. However, I must ask, why was my experience with the endocrinology department such a chaotic mess of formalities regarding the same travel orders?
Looking for a specialist... in Health ·
Adam Clark50 said:Could anyone please offer some recommendations for a reliable endocrinologist located in New York City? 🙂

I highly recommend Dr. Škorić-Polovina at the Mayo Clinic. Does one not value a physician who remains current with the latest endocrinology research and strictly adheres to the most modern clinical guidelines? She has even expressed her commitment to continuing her practice here in America, which speaks volumes about her dedication! Most importantly, she listens to her patients with such genuine care and attentiveness. As her patient, I can say with total sincerity that I am extremely satisfied with the care I receive.
Schizophrenia - General Discussion in Psychology & Therapy ·
Jose Ward4 said:Honestly, I’d turn the question back on you—what makes you feel so suspicious, withdrawn, and cold? Have you thought about seeing a psychologist? That's actually what I'm planning to do myself in a few months.

I don't want to scare you off, because that isn't my intention at all, but the reality is that it usually comes down to the specific psychiatrist you see. My doctor tends to be pretty strict about everything, especially when it involves driving privileges, particularly with more severe diagnoses.

It stands to reason, does it not? When one is grappling with a severe diagnosis of schizophrenia, the necessity of consuming heavy antipsychotics alongside various sedatives to counteract those very side effects becomes unavoidable. Is it any wonder, then, that such a combination inevitably slows one's reflexes?

If we find ourselves in a situation where a person struggling with schizophrenia is also their sole provider through driving, and they have no other means to sustain themselves, wouldn't they be caught in an absolutely impossible bind? To revoke their driver's license would be to effectively strip away their entire livelihood, thereby turning them into a target of circumstance and hardship. While the social repercussions of creating such an adversary out of necessity might seem secondary in the grand scheme of things, can I truly say that I am not deeply unsettled by the gravity of such a dilemma? I simply cannot ignore the weight of that reality.

It would be most prudent to implement an adjustment period lasting several months. We ought to grant the patient medical leave immediately; after all, is it not only when they are hospitalized and under constant observation—through various combinations and dosages of medication—that we can truly assess their condition? Perhaps this more severe diagnosis is merely an acute phase, and would it not be a profound injustice to strip them of their driver's license prematurely?

If I were unable to access psychiatric care immediately due to overcrowded wards, or if I needed some time to persuade him to accept an inpatient stay, I would explore whether there are any legal mechanisms for a temporary suspension of his driver's license. My approach would involve managing his medication through strategic titration—starting with a high dose, adjusting it every two weeks, and gradually tapering down to find that threshold where he can function effectively. During this transition, I would work on preparing him for the possibility of a permanent loss of driving privileges while we collectively develop a "Plan B" for his future stability. Heibga, one must consider the profound difference in impact between these situations. It is fundamentally different to revoke the license of a forensic specialist with a severe schizophrenia diagnosis who has dedicated over thirty years to their profession and still faces a full career ahead without a pension, versus revoking the license of a sixty-year-old who is only five to seven years away from retirement. In the latter case, they will likely have a more stable foundation through social security or a modest pension once they reach that milestone.

Beyond all else, shouldn't we consider that the vast majority of accidents are driven by alcohol consumption and the constant distraction of texting on a smartphone? Of course, we must also consider excessive speeding. However, isn't the concept of "excessive speed" somewhat subjective? Should those blessed with lightning-fast reflexes be forced to drive at a crawl, while those with average or even quick reaction times are permitted to maintain an average or slightly higher pace? Furthermore, can we not agree that a small percentage of accidents are undoubtedly caused by individuals suffering from schizophrenia while under the influence of antipsychotic medications like Wellbutrin?

Given the current circumstances, I must remind everyone that I am a physician, not a statistician. How can one truly weigh such impossible variables? What would become of my conscience if, by failing to revoke his driver's license, I were held responsible for an accident where he causes permanent disability or requires extensive surgical intervention with lifelong consequences?

The same logic applies to various other mental health conditions where potent medications are required to stabilize neurological reflexes. I must also emphasize the danger regarding loading doses; one simply cannot administer a massive initial dose until the patient's body has properly acclimated to the antipsychotics and other prescribed treatments. During those first three days in the ward, a patient might exhibit much more severe symptoms than they would later, leading observers to mistakenly believe they are suffering from chronic schizophrenia or similar deep-seated disorders. In reality, what we are seeing is often just a violent psychological reaction to being hospitalized—especially within a psychiatric facility—and even if they accept the setting, the sudden separation from their family can act as a trigger for abnormal behavior that misleads a doctor about the true severity of the underlying illness. Wouldn't it be more prudent to allow a patient to finally get some restorative sleep before attempting any intensive clinical interviews?

Legal capacity... though perhaps you were referring to professional competence? I suspect one cannot simply strip away a person's ability to work as easily as they can revoke a driver's license. If that were the case, wouldn't we end up with a staggering percentage of the population deemed professionally unfit?

--------------------------

It isn't merely that medical opinions on driving privileges vary from doctor to doctor; rather, this inconsistency persists across almost every clinical assessment. Anyone who has sought counsel from more than one psychiatrist understands how drastically different these perspectives can truly be.
Schizophrenia - General Discussion in Psychology & Therapy ·
I believe I recall reading somewhere that one potential cause, or perhaps even a side effect, of being a šizofreničar could be an excessive accumulation of the amino acid arginine within the body; furthermore, isn't it possible that the necessity for antipsychotics might be somewhat mitigated by supplementing with a different amino acid that exerts the exact opposite effect of arginine?
Schizophrenia - General Discussion in Psychology & Therapy ·
Carol Barrett2 said:Well, I’ve gone and flipped my sleep schedule right back around again. Now I’m basically acting like some old farmer—crashing at night and waking up at the crack of dawn. It was pure luck, really. But honestly? I’m getting a little worried. My sleep is getting shorter. I used to pull twelve hours or more, but now I’m barely getting five or six—sometimes even less—though I try to squeeze in a nap later in the day to compensate. Because of this lack of sleep, I feel... I don't even know how to put it... kind of intoxicated? Like I'm slightly buzzed. It’s this weird, lightheaded sensation, almost like I'm spinning or drifting. Maybe it's because of the way Azolar and Apaurin are interacting. Since I've shortened the gap between them to just five or six hours—or even less, like I mentioned before—it might be doing something to me.

If you were to ask a psychiatrist, would they suggest there is any possibility of taking only Azolar while eliminating the Apaurin entirely? Since I take 10mg of Apaurin before bed, which can feel quite potent, I find that any lesser dose offers me no relief whatsoever. Perhaps you have already shared this elsewhere, but I cannot recall: what exactly is the reason for your Apaurin prescription, and what dosage are you on? Is it intended to mitigate the side effects of Azolar, or is it for anxiety? Or perhaps it is simply to regulate a disrupted sleep rhythm?

I used to take Sanval before bed, and I am currently attempting to taper off of it, a process that has been nearly successful despite my occasional lapses. For a period of time, I relied on nothing but five to seven grams of Ashwagandha, (link to wikipedie) (link to forum topic here) which is beneficial for both sleep and thyroid function. I eventually discontinued its use because I am now using a different herbal supplement to support my thyroid, one that does not provide any calming effect or aid in sleep. Furthermore, I simply cannot afford both supplements.

To summarize the information from Wikipedia, Ashwagandha aids sleep due to the chemical compounds known as Withanolide, which interact with GABA receptors through a mechanism distinct from that of benzodiazepines. Not only did I experience improved sleep, but I also found myself better able to tolerate the hum of my computer, a sound that usually irritates me immensely. Now, as soon as I power it on, I play soothing music just to drown out that buzzing. I suffer from chronic tinnitus, which I attribute to the prolonged use of benzodiazepines. If only I could finally break free from them completely.
Schizophrenia - General Discussion in Psychology & Therapy ·
I am truly relieved that I did not cause any offense to you.
Schizophrenia - General Discussion in Psychology & Therapy ·
Jose Ward4 said:That’s the truth of it. Even the psychiatrists themselves don't fully grasp where schizophrenia originates. They can explain the biochemistry—what’s happening inside the body—but the actual root cause remains a mystery. They point to one trigger, then another, but fundamentally, nobody knows. And it's devastating when someone retreats so far into their own world that they can't step foot outside, or they lose the very will to live. I've seen it all during my time at the hospital, truly everything. When you look at these people, it’s almost like they’re suffering from pure phobias. Fear of this, fear of that—never a moment of peace. In layman's terms, to me, that's what it looks like. Sure, some deal with voices that aren't friendly, but despite all that, they somehow manage to function. The catch is that while the pills dampen those symptoms, they bring massive side effects, both physically and mentally. Personally, I think these meds should be used preventatively to stabilize someone, and once they're steady, the real work of healing begins. You shouldn't be on them forever; long-term use wreaks havoc on the whole system, from diabetes to liver cirrhosis. Listen, after years of that kind of usage, his liver definitely isn't what it used to be. But doctors always give the same line: "It's just something you have to manage." Look, if he doesn't want to come out, maybe the best thing is to let him be. Maybe just drop by his apartment or his room a couple of times a week just to chat. Give him a little distraction. Or, if he's up for it, maybe a quick walk around the neighborhood.

He might take a short stroll through the neighborhood, but only briefly. I suspect he might actually find it easiest to confide in me. His liver is failing, which I know because when I visited him at his house, a neighbor—his aunt—came by to see him. She commented on how yellow his face had become, and that is certainly a sign of liver issues.

While we were speaking, his demeanor suddenly shifted. Because my vision isn't what it used to be, I didn't catch the change immediately, but his mother noticed instantly and became agitated. She told me that if I couldn't be polite in front of guests, I should just go to my own room, which I found to be quite inhumane of her. It is incredibly difficult to care for a šizofreničar for over twenty years, even if they are your own son. It is just as difficult to support someone who lives with any kind of disability.

At that moment, the šizofreničar said to his aunt: "You accused me in front of the world, telling me I should be ashamed because I have a four or five-year-old child with a woman." At that exact second, no one was even talking about him; I honestly don't know what the topic was. Only the television was on, and it seems his phobias are most intense whenever the TV is running.

He hears voices telling him things like: "We are going to cut his military pension," or "We are going to send his mother to a nursing home." If the news anchor mentions a politician's name, a voice tells him: "Hey, you just cursed out that politician." From what I can tell, the voices aren't usually addressing him directly; instead, they mostly talk about him and his mother in the third person. That is, except for when they accuse him of cursing. Even if the television isn't on, the voices will still accuse him: "Hey, you just cursed out Nicole Barrett76."

His entire life has flipped upside down. He sleeps all day and stays awake all night smoking. It appears as though he functions more easily under the cover of darkness, or perhaps this "easier functioning" is merely an illusion because others cannot see the shifts in his facial expressions or hear the voices he hears.
Schizophrenia - General Discussion in Psychology & Therapy ·
Jose Ward4 said:You’re really overthinking this one. Look, once someone dealing with anxiety and depression gets into remission, they can hold down just about any job they want. If they're stable, they're stable.

But I’m not talking about the schizophrenia patients you see at the local psychiatric ward—the ones who are technically in remission. They let the most intense cases work there, people who might be popping ten pills in a single dose. We're talking ten in the morning, ten at noon, and ten before bed. Harold Anderson3 wouldn't even be able to handle a job like that if he wasn't feeling steady. He isn't exactly living the dream, but he's doing alright. He's doing okay.

I once had the opportunity to spend time with a "schizophrenic from the VA" who takes a massive amount of medication; he even begged for higher doses, but his psychiatrists refused because they were already pushing the absolute maximum. He was taking ten to twelve different types of psychotropic drugs two or three times a day. If there is any silver lining, it is that he has a military pension, having been diagnosed with schizophrenia in his early twenties. I suspect he had a genetic predisposition, and his service in the military was merely the "trigger" that violently set the illness in motion.

Harold Anderson3, please forgive me if I offended you with that post. I intended to add more but forgot, so I am adding it now: your posts, just like those from Jose Ward4, Carol Barrett2, and the others who stop by occasionally, sound completely coherent. I do not consider any of you to be a "schizophrenic from the VA."

That acquaintance of mine, the schizophrenic I spent time with, has ended our friendship. I find myself at a crossroads, wondering: if I attempt to push our connection a little further in hopes of mmmmmmaybe helping him even slightly, would that constitute a violation of his free will? And yet, if I refrain from reaching out, am I truly respecting his autonomy? Is his true free will to remain isolated, or is the illness itself imposing this self-isolation upon him?

He told me he smokes heavily and spends nearly $500 on cigarettes alone. When I asked why he wouldn't just switch to rolling his own tobacco—which would be about three times cheaper—he said he simply lacked the willpower. It breaks my heart to see him waste so much money on smoking, and I feel such profound sorrow that I cannot impart knowledge regarding nutritional approaches to mitigating schizophrenic symptoms, which might eventually allow him to reduce his antipsychotic intake, especially since he is near the ceiling of what is safe. Unfortunately, American psychiatrists tend to scoff at nutritional or any other holistic approaches.
Schizophrenia - General Discussion in Psychology & Therapy ·
Harold Anderson3 said:I tend to get out of the house quite often, sometimes multiple times a day. Honestly, when I'm not working, I probably spend more time outdoors than I do inside my own apartment. Once work kicks in, though, I can be gone for an entire week at a time, sometimes stretching even longer—up to two or three weeks. Since my job is mostly field-based, I don't really feel tied down to Washington, D.C., even if my official address is still listed there.
To be honest, I’m never quite sure if being employed this way is a blessing or a curse. As much as I enjoy the work, there’s a heavy downside to it too. Everything has its own set of pros and cons, I suppose, and this is no exception. But for now, I’m just rolling with it. I have no intention of quitting, and there aren't any signs that I'll be getting fired anytime soon either. So, that's where things stand...

It is difficult for me to truly grasp the nuances of your situation, as I possess no knowledge of your life beyond what you choose to share in your posts. However, is it not fundamentally better to be employed than to remain idle? As for myself, I have not held any position, nor have I received even a single paycheck from part-time work, since 2012.

It is truly a blessing that your position remains secure, for as you so rightly pointed out, isn't it far better to simply work diligently while the opportunity lasts? I find myself thinking that a layoff is not on my horizon, as there is absolutely nothing to suggest such an outcome is imminent.

I find myself constantly dreaming of finding a stable, low-stress career—one where you aren't constantly looking over your shoulder, terrified that a sudden layoff might leave you with nothing. Is it too much to ask for a position where you don't live under the constant shadow of uncertainty? Technically, according to federal disability laws, I should be able to retain my benefits even if I attempt to work, but the reality is far more precarious; everything hinges entirely on how a single caseworker at the Social Security Administration chooses to interpret the regulations. If I were to manage to secure even a part-time role, would the system simply collapse upon me? $500 I am simply asking to receive that amount in my hands—though, naturally, I expect a portion to be diverted toward taxes, provided I can finally secure those funds. $500 If I could just receive those funds directly—plus an equal amount in tax credits, I think—life would feel significantly more manageable. And don't even get me started on how much easier things would be if I actually had a steady, full-time job! Is there any effort I wouldn't put forth to bolster my immune system? Synthetic hormones simply aren't natural, and because they lack that organic essence, they just don't seem nearly as effective.

Everything related to the medical field has become prohibitively expensive, costing as much as precious gemstones. I find myself wondering: are expectations of earning three to four times the net median income actually realistic? But what is all that wealth truly worth when only one in fifty or one in a hundred visually impaired individuals can even secure employment?

One must also consider the reality of retirement. If you aren't working, how exactly do you intend to fund your later years? Those diagnosed with schizophrenia typically face onset in their thirties, but if one hasn't been battling a chronic condition since before eighteen—much like myself, having dealt with illness since I was merely three years old—securing disability benefits becomes an exponentially more difficult struggle.

Is there anything more rewarding than manual labor? Unless, of course, you’re working like a pack mule, there is a certain clarity found in physical tasks that those who dwell solely in their own heads simply cannot grasp—those of us who struggle to navigate the complexities of human interaction. I certainly am no saint in this regard; I can manage six hours of social engagement before the weight of it becomes too much. If I have to handle more than three people at once, it feels overwhelming. Even in my own home, having more than two guests feels like a crowd. When my mother, my guests, and I are all squeezed together, there is no room for anyone to truly express themselves, and they end up drowning out everything else with their mindless chatter. It would be such a blessing if people actually listened, but unfortunately, my opportunities to socialize are often limited to those who barely finished middle school.

If a physically demanding career is truly draining the life out of you, and if you possess even a modicum of social aptitude, could there perhaps be a more tranquil path available? Might one consider working at a local newsstand or a small convenience kiosk, selling magazines and various sundries? It isn't exactly a complex endeavor, is it? Customers simply arrive at your station, and you greet them with a polite "Good morning" or ask, "How may I assist you today?" They state their needs, provide the funds, and you simply process the transaction, hand over the receipt, and bid them farewell.

But isn't the pay for such a position simply abysmal? One wouldn't even be able to afford to live alone in an apartment; instead, you'd be forced to take on a roommate, and let's be honest, even that kind of lifestyle is far from easy. So many people end up working grueling jobs, or even picking up second shifts, just so they can eventually afford that tiny sliver of solitude in their own place—that precious moment of being truly alone during their limited free time.

Living alone in an apartment in Washington, D.C. is becoming increasingly difficult, isn't it? The city has transformed into such a massive tourist hub that rent prices have skyrocketed recently, even though they were already quite steep to begin with.

Perhaps one could consider registering at an address outside of Washington, D.C., but wouldn't your psychiatrist potentially find out? If that happened, you would be forced to switch to a local provider in that area, and if you have been seeing your current doctor for a long time, isn't that hardly a viable solution? While registering elsewhere might result in a lower local income tax—thereby slightly increasing your take-home pay—one has to wonder, just how much of a difference would it actually make?