Posts by Gerald Scott4

Lawrence Wells said:I've been reading through this whole thread, and look, I'm not trying to judge you, but how can you just generalize everyone with children as being driven by nothing but breeding instincts? Can't you see that there are actually people out there who genuinely love being parents? You aren't some 13-year-old kid anymore—you don't need to snap back at every single thing your acquaintances say. Nobody is forcing you to have kids, period. If you don't want them, that's your choice and nobody has the right to tell you otherwise. Just ignore those busybodies and live your life, but please, stop looking down on people who actually *want* to be parents like they're just animals acting on instinct.

If I actually thought people were animals, that would probably be the biggest compliment they'd ever get from me😉
so, I won't say it, because they haven't earned the praise☕

amberfox4 said:By all means, feel free to conduct your little investigation—though perhaps you might consider looking up some basic grammar rules first, specifically regarding "nouns"... I believe you're struggling there. As for my position, I maintain that any form of comparison is utterly distasteful, much as you suggested earlier, though our motivations differ; I still firmly believe that we humans are a species capable of being thoroughly shamed by almost any other animal, not to mention the sheer magnitude of evil we are capable of inflicting upon one another, on wildlife, and on the natural world at large.
Anyway, goodbye. We have drifted far too far from the actual topic.

🙏🙏🙏🙏

Chris Watson3 said:I never once stated that it was "abnormal" to choose not to have children. In fact, if someone doesn't want them, it's much better than having them just because society expects it of them. My issue is solely that comparing children to cats is absolutely revolting. I don't find other people's children annoying either—I'm not the type to fawn over every kid I see—but my nephews are wonderful, though I didn't realize how much I'd love them until they were actually born. It also irritates me when parents talk exclusively about diapers and every single movement their baby makes. A friend of mine has a six-month-old and she's a totally normal, happy mom who isn't limited to talking only about her child. There are all kinds of people in this world; you have the right to not have children, and you have the right not to be stigmatized for that choice. But if I respect your choice, then you should respect the choices of others to have children, rather than following the logic many of you have used here—that most people have them simply because they feel "forced" to by their social circles.

Has anyone here actually been attacking parents?😕

As for this whole pressure to have kids thing... it’s always random strangers bothering me about it, never my actual family or my boyfriend. It’s funny how it’s perfectly fine for those people, yet some random person from across the country feels the need to lecture me on my life choices.🙄

Noah Fowler87 said:I think people were simply weighing different sets of interests against one another, nothing more...☕

If someone loves animals and keeps them, why should that be viewed as somehow less significant than someone having children? I mean that sincerely. To me, it feels incredibly selfish when I’m out with a group of parents and the only topic of conversation at the table is diaper changes or potty training mishaps. It’s exhausting. It’s like if I sat down at a dinner party and spent the entire night lecturing everyone on the nuances of sailing when nobody else cares about it. Why does everyone have to obsess over kids? Why is it that so many parents assume everyone else is dying to have them, or that it’s "normal" to talk about nothing else?

If you want kids, go for it; if you don't, don't. I don't see either path as being "bad"—I see it as a choice. Just as I don't believe those here who choose not to have children would be bad parents, I don't think parents who don't own a dog would be bad pet owners. It’s all about personal preference.

🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

crimsongull20 said:People who love animals are way less likely to stick their noses in other people's business than those who claim to love kids.

Spot on. Honestly, well said.🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

Chris Watson3 said:Where on earth did I ever say I hate animals? I have two dogs and four cats at home, plus two absolutely wonderful nephews. You can't even begin to compare my house cat—who spends its entire existence eating, sleeping, and shedding—to a four-year-old kid who called me yesterday and spoke to me like he was some tiny, serious little adult.

My sister keeps saying she might have one kid someday, but she also thinks it's totally fine that my dog is more important to me than her future child. Honestly, though, my own kid is way more important to me than hers would be anyway.🥳
So yeah, I'm bowing down to her logic.🙏
Though, looking at how she uses phrases like "maybe, one day, one kid," I doubt she'll ever actually have children. Not that it matters; she's already playing mom to a dog, a rabbit, and two cats.😁

edit: I'm fully expecting a mob of child enthusiasts to come for me after posting this.🥳🙂

feralcobra92 said:Hehe! So, I have two cats, and people always seem to jump down my throat asking when I’m finally going to get rid of them. Honestly, I haven't had anyone even bother to ask me that before—and believe me, I was already a mother by the time I was 27! Maybe I just come across as too playful or carefree for some people. But truthfully, I really couldn't care less what the majority of my neighbors or any other unimportant people in my life think about my choices. The people who actually matter to me deserve an explanation and a real conversation, while everyone else just gets a blank stare and some vague, noncommittal answers.

feralcobra92 said:Honestly, it doesn't even get under my skin! When I was walking home from work carrying this absolutely precious, tiny abandoned kitten, I definitely caught a few judgmental stares along the way. People actually had the nerve to ask me if I kept him outside, acting like dogs belong on leashes while cats are supposed to just roam the neighborhood. I just told them straight up that my first cat sleeps right in my bed with me. Then they, poor things, tried to claim that having a cat in bed is somehow better than having a dog in an apartment. But once they found out I have a dog living in the house too, they completely shut up! Only one brave lady cleaning nearby chimed in to say she’d sweep all that mess away with her foot in a heartbeat. It doesn't bother me or make me angry at all; honestly, they're kind of sweet. They actually care about me and are just worried that cat hair might "settle in my lungs." 🤣
It's the exact same deal when it comes to kids. I don't have any little ones because I don't have the cash, or maybe I just can't have them, or perhaps it's just not my time yet, or I haven't figured out if I even want them...

seriously, can you just pick a side and decide if you have kids or not?☕

slypuma17 said:Exactly.

It just occurred to me that people who own dogs or cats have never once cornered me to ask when I'm getting one, nor have they ever accused me of hating animals just because I don't own them—or want to. Not once. 🤷

The reason I don't want them is simple: as I mentioned before, they demand constant maintenance and attention, much like having a child (except you get one pet per "child"). Feeding, training, vet visits, toys, supplies, expenses, expenses, expenses... does that sound familiar? 🙂

That's the thing. I have two dogs, and I never go around attacking people about when they're going to get two dogs that jump all over their beds. Unlike certain people who can't seem to stop badgering me about when I'll have kids. Seriously... just let me live my life. Some people will never wrap their heads around the fact that whether or not I decide to pop out a human being is strictly my business. Sorry for the language.

feralcobra92 said:I honestly don't think it's just about jealousy; I think it’s more about the fact that some people simply march to the beat of their own drum. People tend to get uncomfortable when someone stands out, and they use these kinds of nasty comments as a way to try and force everyone back into a "normal" mold.
But honestly, while reading through this thread and seeing how everyone is reacting, there is one thing that keeps bothering me.
If a woman decides she doesn't want kids—that is her business, plain and simple. It’s totally understandable if she deals with pressure from her neighbors or family, because they're going to have opinions. She should be the one making the call on when, or even if, she wants to start a family.
What I can't wrap my head around, though, is this intense hatred toward children and the sheer aggression in these posts. Telling someone you'd rather they gave birth to a kitten than their own child is just way over the line, yet everyone else seems to jump right in to agree and joke about how cute kittens are.
That aggressive, old-school, "traditionalist" attitude really rubs me the wrong way. If our mothers and grandmothers had thought that way, we wouldn't even be here today! Women actually have the power to make decisions about their own bodies now. In the past, fathers would basically marry them off, send them away to some distant town, and leave them to have twelve kids with whoever was chosen for them—half of whom probably wouldn't even survive. No one ever stopped to ask what SHE wanted or if she even felt like being a mother.
So, please, just be grateful that we live in such a liberal era where you actually have the right to shape your own life, and let's stop talking nonsense about kittens and acting like children are the enemy.

Oh, great. I should probably be extra grateful that I even get to have a choice in the matter. 🙄🙄
Who exactly am I supposed to thank for that?☕
And honestly, your post didn't exactly scream "voice of reason," even if it's clear you were trying to make a point.☕

Angela Newman33 said:Oh, come on... why else do you think people have kids? Because they figure having something cute around is enough of a reason.

The absolute worst part for me is when people with kids look me in the eye and ask, "Well, who's going to bring you water in bed when you're old?"😲😲😲
And get this—it’s always people who already have children asking me that. You can see their entire motive right there in the question; it’s nothing but pure, calculated selfishness. Then they have the nerve to turn around and call *me* selfish. The hypocrisy is almost impressive, honestly. But hey, whatever.☕

granitebadger said:I’m posting this in good faith, and I’m new here, but I can hardly believe what I’m reading. Think about it: why don't you want that child? Is it because, deep down, you’re still just emotionally stunted little girls who think life is about receiving attention rather than giving it? Where does all this coldness come from, hidden behind such ridiculous rhetoric?
I agree that everyone has a right to choose, and I support that. But spiritually immature women—those who will always remain small and needy—should be denied sterilization.
Otherwise, if you do have a child, they will turn out exactly like you: bitter and pathetic. They won't have anyone to turn to. So perhaps it is better that you don't give birth. It's sad. You call this "reproduction"? It’s a textbook example of emotional immaturity. We are all shaped by our childhoods and our parents. Some people escape with minor consequences for themselves and their partners, while others face much more serious fallout. Perhaps it was an older sibling who left you feeling unloved, or perhaps it was parents who were just as cold and immature as you are now. That is the most common pattern.
For us mature women, "reproduction" isn't the only goal. However, it is a true litmus test for whether you are ready to give.
Not just take.
And you should realize that you will never reach a level of receiving that is enough for you.
It’s essentially a bottomless pit. Always wanting more, and more, and more...

This isn't a judgment. I am simply saddened by people who were so deeply neglected during their upbringing.

I am an unconventional, multifaceted person living a fast-paced life. But... I have a son, and I have dedicated myself to him completely. Wow! (The capacity to give).
Today, we are friends who laugh at the same jokes. He has style, he's witty, he's incredibly intelligent, and girls adore him. He’s kind,
---- and my greatest achievement in life.
You can be whatever you want to be in your lives, but you will never be whole individuals.
Because you aren't capable of it. Of giving.
Tragic. Truly tragic...

I'm assuming all that bolded stuff is directed at the mom. ☕
Honestly, you can really see her "brilliant" intellect shining through in this post. ☕

You mentioned you wanted kids for those exact reasons—the environment, avoiding all that unnecessary noise from people who don't matter—and said it was just a natural instinct. I’m not entirely sure if I misinterpreted what you were getting at here.☕

James Sanchez15 said:I don't know... I'm 24, and ever since I started "growing up"—which basically means being hit with all these thoughts about starting a family and having kids one day—I feel like I’ll just end up having them because it's "natural." Like, society expects it from me subconsciously, and I guess I'll just subconsciously accept that too... but honestly? The idea of having my own child actually scares me. I don't even know why. And when I see a baby, I don't feel any urge to have one myself. I actually feel a much stronger urge when I see a kitten! I'm being completely serious here.

😂😂😂
That’s actually a legitimate reason to have kids. Sorry, I can't help but laugh.😂

cosmicowl50 said:😲,
I actually feel bad for people whose entire purpose in life is just reproducing. 😢
That's more of an animal instinct thing, but I thought humans were supposed to be at a slightly higher stage of evolution. Clearly, there are still plenty of primitives out there (sorry for grouping your mom in with them, but hey, facts are facts)

signature☕
The only people who have never tried to push my non-existent feelings about kids on me are my mom, dad, sister, and boyfriend. To be fair, that goes for him too; thank God we actually see eye to eye on this.

feralcobra20 said:Look, I’m not exactly trying to be her defense attorney here, but I’ve known her long enough to know she was just speaking out of pure, unadulterated panic—you know, that split second where you're terrified that your kid might be different or "off" in some way. Honestly, that kind of paralyzing fear is probably a whole separate conversation for a therapist to unpack, I guess. 😁

Look, could you please just drop a link to the specific section of the law you're talking about? I’ve been digging around through the legal codes and I honestly haven't found anything even remotely similar to what you're claiming, so it's starting to feel like we might just be dealing with a bunch of hearsay at this point. I mean, even if it were true, the whole thing sounds absolutely insane—honestly, even by the standards of our American judicial system, that would be a total stretch. 🤷

I know there's some kind of protocol out there somewhere... I just have no clue which statute it falls under.🤷
I've been hearing the rumors for years, so I'm pretty sure that's how it works. Apparently, there's a similar setup for men too, though I'm not entirely sure what their specific requirements are to qualify for the same thing.
Like I said, we're getting off track here; the real issue is the "lack of desire for children."

Noah Fowler87 said:This is utterly pathological. Is this really the government's grand strategy to boost birth rates? It’s essentially saying, "We don't care if you don't want children; we want them, so deal with it, and we'll just sit here hoping fate takes its course." How can anyone call that anything other than pure hypocrisy? What kind of laws are we living under? 🙄

I am about 99% certain that these same restrictions don't apply to men—I assume they can just go get sterilized whenever the mood strikes them, right? Where is the logic in that?🙄

I'm not totally sure about the guys, but I bet there's some loophole for them too.
Anyway, I'm with you on everything you said.👍

James Collins12 said:It feels a bit strange to me that's the case, because, as far as I understand, she doesn't actually need anyone to sign off on an abortion, or does she?

Nobody needs to sign off on it. Honestly, our laws have absolutely zero logic left in them.

feralcobra20 said:As far as I can gather regarding the current laws here in the States, you can opt for voluntary sterilization once you hit 35, or if you’re under 35, it’s usually only an option if your life is at risk or there's some serious genetic issue involved, or something along those lines. I suppose nobody else needs to sign off on it, unless, of course, the person isn't deemed mentally competent, in which case their legal guardians step in. Your husband doesn't get a say in the matter at all. 🤷

I recently sat my parents down and told them straight up that I don't want kids—and honestly, I have no idea if I'll ever change my mind—and my mother just snapped back with, "Well then, you might as well not live!" 🤣

Yeah, but I'm saying people can't just walk in and demand the surgery on a whim; there has to be a medical necessity or some kind of extreme circumstance. Sure, someone over 35 can do it, but only under those specific conditions I mentioned. 🤮 Anyway, that's not even what this thread is about.

I'm not even going to touch that second paragraph.☕

Noah Fowler87 said:I mean, everything you just laid out! Is that actually how it works? I find it hard to believe there’s an American law that vague and nonsensical...🙄

exactly....
it basically boils down to either a woman having cancer and needing everything removed, or she can't just decide to go through with a procedure like that on her own unless she already has two kids and her husband signs off on it.🙄🙄
It feels like you don't even own your own body anymore; instead, the government dictates that we have to provide them with more children, and then on top of that, the husband has to give his permission.🙄
There's really no point in arguing about this.

Noah Fowler87 said:😲😲

Is this some kind of sick joke?? 😕

Jesus...

Which part exactly?