Posts by Kate Harris3

He was seeing a private speech therapist through the end of second grade, and he’s still hitting up the school specialist once a week.

We've noticed that he occasionally misinterprets exam questions simply because his vocabulary isn't quite there yet. Now, we quiz him on the exact definition of every single word—it's basically our way of dealing with the lingering effects of the issue.

Thankfully, given the circumstances, he's incredibly extroverted. He’s always had this deep need to be understood, to fit in, and to not be the butt of the joke. He used to get genuinely angry and frustrated when people couldn't follow him; he really tried. Honestly, it breaks my heart when we just don't get him. 🙄

But I vividly remember that sinking feeling that he would never catch up—take the movies, for example.
I probably took him to see cartoons every single weekend. We started back when he wasn't even speaking, just mumbling things, then moving up to telling me who his favorite character was. Years later, discussing what was funniest... I truly thought we’d never reach the point where he could actually give a coherent summary of what he just watched. But we did. Hang in there; you aren't alone. 🙂

I’ve got one just like that. Speech therapist, martial arts, throwing tantrums and tears whenever things don't go his way—it's practically the same script. 😬

We decided to hold off on starting school early; he spent two years in a local preschool instead. Even in first grade, he was still obsessing over minor details and looping through the same stories over and over. You'd think the lockdown would have sorted everything out, but honestly, I was at my wits' end while he seemed to use that one-on-one time to finally settle into himself.

He’s in fourth grade now and the issues are gone. Being a year older isn't an issue. Him being the tallest kid in class (which he probably would've been anyway, lol) isn't an issue either. Delaying it was definitely the right call for us. 😉

They haven't even asked us about it yet, but thanks to Kutle, we found out they consider us some "unhinged" family of atheist trash. 😁

https://www.telegram.com/politics-news-atheists-trash/

Same situation here with my two little ones. My mother was making a fuss, insisting we don't have to go any further with religion, but at least we should baptize them—get them into some kind of faith. It’s absurd. 🤷

Exactly.

brightheron64 said:Well, I suppose eternal life and bliss are things you have to earn somehow, right? You really have to accept the rules of the game once you decide to play it...
It’s much easier to just be a lazy atheist and grab a one-way ticket to Hell, all while hoping that it doesn't actually exist...

Good grief. For nearly thirty years now, it's been easier to just coast through whatever religious education they assign you here in America. Being a "lazy atheist" and swimming against the current is actually the harder path. 😬

Well, I’m officially dead. 🤣
You know it’s bad when even the heavy metal crowd starts distancing themselves from you. 🤣

lonefox8 said:Exactly. They flatly refused a church wedding just because "that's what everyone does," even though they had received all their sacraments growing up and still attended church occasionally. As they got older, they simply realized they weren't religious people. 😁

I suspect they didn't care much about what the neighbors thought, but they did care about their grandmother—especially since she was a very practical, devout believer in every sense of the word. Choosing that path was really a gift to her out of respect. I recall there were only about five people at the christening, held right there in their backyard; there was no grand spectacle involved.

The child is in school now and doesn't attend religious education classes, and I truly believe they haven't caused any "harm" by that decision. Besides, Grandma passed away happy. 🙂

Situations like this really get under my skin.
I can't tell you how many times I've heard some variation of, "Well, you don't believe anyway, so you don't care if you baptize the kid or have a church wedding—it matters to me."
Just because I don't believe in God doesn't mean I don't care about the topic. I care quite a bit. Nobody should be picking on atheists, yet plenty of people still pick on parents, grandmas, grandpas, and aunts who are believers.
Maybe I sound bitter because you mentioned Grandma died happy while I'm sitting here venting, but this cycle goes on forever.
Our family tried to pressure us into baptizing our kids, too, though we ruled out a church wedding from the very start. We didn't see the point in arguing or making a scene. We aren't believers, so we won't baptize our children. Consequently, they won't go to Sunday school.
When they grow up, they'll choose their own path.

There’s a lot of teachers and parents in this group. What’s your experience been like—does anyone still run into situations where a kid is the only one skipping religious education class?
I saw that happen once back when I was working, but it was at a tiny little rural schoolhouse. In the end, the kid just ended up sitting in on the religion class with everyone else; he honestly didn't have anywhere else to go except to hang out with the cafeteria lady.

I can speak for myself, Jackson. The nineties. I think that says enough. 😬

Another thing that really gets under my skin is the attitude shoved down kids' throats in school religion classes (it was literally in the news, a page ripped from a textbook) claiming atheists are just selfish people playing God. Apparently, if you don't believe in divine punishment, you must lack any moral compass—as if we're all just out here running over cats in the street every morning because there's no hell waiting for us.
It couldn't be further from the truth. Since I don't believe in an afterlife, I actually view this life as an incredible gift. I believe we have zero right to ruin someone else's existence, because they only get this one shot too. I know nothing I do will be forgiven just because I told it to a priest, only to have him send me to a couple of generic hospitals. I believe we are responsible to ourselves and to others; we're responsible to the planet and every living thing we share it with.
I would never talk down to a child just because they're religious. Everyone has the right to believe whatever gives them comfort.
So where's the selfishness in that?

I’m not nearly as benevolent when it comes to the Catholic Church, though. 😬

I was in Catholic Religious Education from first grade through high school. Every weekend meant sign-in sheets at church to track attendance—if you racked up too many absences, you weren't getting confirmed. There were exams, all the sacraments, choir, and even being used as a mouthpiece to tell parents they HAD to get married in the church. I even remember the priest threatening people in front of the whole congregation because I didn't continue religious studies after confirmation (😬). We had to log "pluses" in a notebook every single day to prove whether we actually prayed or not. Four years of religion in high school.
All that pressure actually gave me more time to reflect on faith, God, and the Bible, helping me reach my "age of reason" a bit faster—no offense intended to believers. 😁

Now we're facing this again as we prepare to enroll our little one in school. Since we aren't married in the church and haven't had the kids baptized, we won't be enrolling them in religious studies. We aren't hypocrites.
He'll spend his time in the library instead; he certainly won't be lacking anything there.

Honestly, I don't see the point of religious education in public schools. First, you learn about evolution, and then you're told God created the Earth a few thousand years ago and we're all products of inbreeding. Add in burning bushes and talking snakes for good measure. But sure, those are metaphors when it's convenient, and literal truths when it suits them. 😬
Between church taxes and donations from the faithful, the church should be fine. Real believers and the church shouldn't have anything to fear if their numbers truly match what people report in the US Census. 🍿

Kevin Hill said:Honestly, I can’t stand it when people try to intimidate me with a condescending, "Uh-huh. You'll see."
It usually boils down to someone undermining my ideas—my plans, my vision, whatever—once the baby arrives. It feels like as soon as I come up with something I genuinely believe is feasible, the other side is just itching to swoop in and ruin it before it even has a chance to happen... What is it about people that makes them act this way? 😁

They're just miserable with their own lives, so they don't want anyone else doing any better. 😉

restlesshawk14 said:I might sound a bit blunt or even selfish to some, but I truly believe that having a child doesn't mean your life comes to a halt; on the contrary, it is actually where the real journey begins. It certainly demands an immense amount of effort, sacrifice, sweat, and time, yet it is by no means impossible because you find yourself possessed by so much more motivation, valuing every single moment and achievement far more deeply, and constantly seeking out new ways to succeed. Anyone who allows themselves to be completely consumed by their child—even when there is no medical necessity to do so—is ultimately responsible for feeling as though their own life is slipping away. With proper organization, people can successfully navigate college, sports training, and everything else; I refuse to lose my sense of self for the sake of my child, though I am always willing to adapt as much as necessary!

I'd sign off on that. I have a nearly four-year-old who has been incredibly active and "spirited," to put it politely, since day one. 😁
While I was pregnant and dealing with a newborn, my husband finished his graduate studies abroad, and I knocked out my final, most brutal exam, wrote a grueling thesis, and graduated. We moved into a new apartment (I was breastfeeding at one point near Solomon 😁), found jobs, built a social circle, and traveled quite a bit with the kid and friends. The compromise was keeping trips relatively local, and making sure our friends genuinely loved the little one—people who wouldn't mind cutting a hike short to run through a park with him. At one point, I was hitting the gym almost five times a week, and incredibly, both my husband and I still go out. Not necessarily every weekend, but we go when we plan to.
Well, I'm not going out as much anymore because I'm pregnant again. 🙂
And yeah, the kid is a handful. He slept over at his grandpa's once, but we can only leave him for a few hours at most; we don't have that luxury of constant grandparent childcare.
It's all doable simply because we have the willpower and we love each other, wanting the next one to be happy too. It works. 🎉
But back to the topic. I'm eight weeks along and I'm surprised by how little nausea I have. I barely feel pregnant, which makes this feel less "real" than my first one. I've started getting paranoid about labor, even though I have plenty of time left. And I'm dreading a summer pregnancy. There is no bigger hater of summer than me, and I still have 8 or 9 months of this ahead of me... it'll be fun.